"Seven and the Ragged Tiger"
By Kativic
Flames/more flames: luke_sky_rulz@hotmail.com

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, George Lucas does (but he can feel
free to give them to me, 'cause I certainly wouldn't mind the soul rights to
mess with their lives, or whatever Lucas claims to be doing with them. Nor do
I claim to have written this song, I'm not entirely sure that the band even
admits to it anymore.

Summary: Wedge and the Rogue in the SongFic to end all song fics. (Sorry, it had to
be done)

Wedge Antilles walked into the Pilots' lounge like he did almost every
morning since he joined the Rebel Alliance. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.
Tycho was drinking some caff, Gavin was downing the blue milk stuff that he noticed
people from Tatooine seemed to enjoy. Basically, it was a very boring scene.
Needless to say, Wes, the eternal child, had yet to pull himself out of bed.
Wedge poured himself some caff and seated himself next to his second in command.
Tycho gave him a nod and a half smile from around his mug and went back to reading
whatever was so engrossing on his data pad. Wedge leaned back in his chair. Boring
was very good, sometimes.
Then, suddenly, Wes was standing in the doorway. He wasn't doing anything
particularly spectacular, just scratching at his chest. This wasn't too unusual of
a sight, at least, until Wes actually stepped into the room.

//Shake up the picture the lizard mixture
With a dance on the eventide//

Wedge looked up with confusion. Had he just heard something? He looked around
the room, where the other pilots were also looking perplexed.
"Did you hear something, Wes?" Wedge asked.
Wes glanced up from pouring sugar into his caff, "Naw, why? Did you say
something?"
"Never mind," Wedge said.
Everything settled down, and the pilots forgot about the weird noise they
heard, attributing it to a misconnected comm call.
Then Hobbie entered the lounge.

//You got me coming up with answers
All of which I deny//

There it is again!, Wedge thought. Tycho looked up from his reading to give
Wedge a weird look.
"Should we call control about this?" Tycho inquired. "If this is a comm call,
I'm not sure I want to hear the rest of it."
"No," Wedge replied. "I doubt they'd get to the problem until tomorrow."
Tycho nodded in agreement, and that ended the conversation. It wasn't as if the little
comm mess was really that annoying.
Hobbie sat down next to Nawarra Ven, and weird noise started up again.

//I said it again
Could I please rephrase it
Maybe I can catch a ride//

Wedge wrinkled his nose in disgust. This was sounding less and less like a
bad comm call and more and more like a joke of Wes's.
"Wes," Wedge began, and the other man looked at the commander, "have you been
messing with the comm system in some weird plot to drive me insane again?" Wedge
glared accusingly at the eternal child.
"No, boss!" Wes practically shouted, "I'm just as confused by this as you are,
really!" The look of shock on Wes's face made Wedge figure that the man was probably
innocent of wrong doing, but still...

//I couldn't really put it much planer
But I'll wait till you decide//

There it was again! Hobbie got up out of his seat and started to investigate
the speakers. He fiddled with a few connections, but it didn't do any good. In fact,
it got louder.

//I light my torch and wave it for the
New Moon on Monday
With a firedance through the night
I stayed the cold day with a lonely satellite//

Gavin pressed his hands to his ears and let out a terrible wail.
"Make it stop! Make it stop! 'Shake up the picture the lizard mixture?' It
makes no sense!" With that he ran out of the lounge.
Wedge watched as Gavin left, but decided not to follow. He was much more
interested in finding the perpetrator who was torturing his pilots. The individual
would die a slow and painful death, but not before he paid off all the therapy bills
he knew Gavin was going to run up.

//Breaking away with the beast of both worlds
A smile that you can't disguise//

"GAAAAAAHH!" came Hobbie's high pitched scream. The dour looking man huddled
into the corner furthest from the offending speaker. Wes rushed over to his friend,
but he too was soon consumed by the sheer terror of what was happening.

//Every minute I keep finding
Clues that you leave behind//

No one can dare say the pilots of Rogue Squadron are not brave individuals,
but even they could not stand up to the abomination streaming through the comm speaker.
Nawarra Ven sat in a stupor, his lekku twitching. Tycho was rocking back and forth
mumbling "my head is full of chopstick and I don't like it." Others were hitting their
heads against the wall to try and block out the sounds.

//Save me from these reminders
As if I'd forget tonight
This time La Luna----//

Wedge screamed and pulled his blaster. He shot the entire clip into the comm
speaker, not stopping until there was no sound but the sizzling metal.
The horror was over. The pilots shook themselves out of the numbness that had overcome
them, calling to each other to see if they were all OK.
The door to the lounge opened, and Corran Horn walked in. "You've gone too far
this time, but I'm dancing on the Valentine," he sang softly. He stopped dead in his
tracks as he noticed the deathly silence around him.
"Hey," he said, "What happened to the Duran Duran song I was piping through the
comm system?"
He never had a chance of escaping.


Author's Note: I would like to apologize to any and all Duran Duran members, fans, or
others who are offended by the use of their song(s). I love the band, personally, but
you must admit that their stuff from the 80s is pretty much all on crack. The song
used was "New Moon on Monday" with little snippets from "The Reflex" and "(I'm Looking
For) Cracks In the Pavement."