alt8


Alternate Routes
Chapter 8

Stories and Play

It was early Monday morning before Lupin made it back up to Dumbledore's rooms. He poured out a goblet of wolfs bane potion and sat down at the table with Dumbledore. Snape was still asleep, the aftermath of the potion coursing through his system.
So, I talked to Harry about wandless magic, Lupin started the conversation after a cheery greeting.
Seems our Potions Master has a habit of shutting doors
without a wand as well as turning off all the fires in the
class when a spill occurred, he smirked. Hermione noticed
it, too. She didn't think about it since she'd seen you do
it on another occasion.
Dumbledore nodded as if Lupin had shared the weather report. He continued to eat his hot cereal as he sized up the rasher of bacon in front of them. Lupin stared at him.
Albus! Don't you have anything to say?
Did you want that last piece of raisin toast? I quite
enjoy it with a bit of bacon sometimes. He reached over and took the toast in question. Lupin now glared.
ABOUT SNAPE! he yelled. Then looked at the bedroom door.
he covered his mouth quickly. They both waited to see if the man had woken up because of the shout. After a minute, and he'd swallowed his bite, Dumbledore turned to face the younger man.
And what would you have me do? Test his abilities? Bring
the strength to his notice? He's tearing himself up over
Voldemort calling him back to be a play toy before he's
killed outright by Malfoy and his gang. I don't think he
really needs the pressure of trying to master this particular
skill right now. It is a wonderful gift but he needs to
focus on his health. Once he's back up to speed and
strength we will talk with him. I will work with him. But
not now, Remus. Let him rest. The headmaster returned his attention to the toast and bacon.
Well, I guess you're right, Albus. It just seems like such
a great thing to be able to do....
It takes a great deal of energy. Why do you think
he basically collapsed yesterday morning? Throwing
that lightening bolt even in jest took more energy
than he is able to spare. Practicing would strip him down
to naught, he reached over and touched Lupin's hand.
Give him time, Remus. Just enough to get over the
worst of the exhaustion. Lupin lowered his head,
Sorry, Albus. I just get so excited I plunge ahead without
thinking it through.
That's ok, Remus. We need something to be excited
about.
They returned to their breakfast for a few minutes, Dumbledore noted with a smile the sugar being spooned over the hot oatmeal. He knew the transformation into werewolf that was coming up Wednesday used a lot of energy, too. Lupin just had the luxury of being healthy so he only needed to eat heavier, more caloric meals before the event.
Plus the man had a sweet tooth that beat anyone else!
You know, Albus, Severus said something strange to me
yesterday morning, Lupin poured out more tea for both of them.
Only one thing? Dumbledore teased, causing Lupin to grin.
Yes, unusual, isn't it? he sipped at the hot tea, grimaced, then added some more sugar. The Headmaster encouraged him with a nod.
Well, I asked him if he'd been angry with me. He'd
gone to bed without a word the night before. He was
surprised and said he hadn't been angry but that he was
being selfish and just went to bed. I've been thinking about
it, but I can't figure out what he's referring to. Do you?
Dumbledore thought a moment.
Yes, I think he was referring to the candy tin. I don't
know if you remember, I put it away after you took a
second piece.
The sweets? Were those his? he asked.
Harry, Hermione and Ron brought them back, although it
seems Rosemerta bought them. Dumbledore replied.
So I was eating his sweets? He should have said
something.
And you would have teased him, right? Dumbledore asked evenly.
Lupin grinned sheepishly.
I don't think he's being truly selfish, Dumbledore mused.
let me tell you about something that happened years
back when Severus first began teaching for me. The older wizard settled back onto the chair. Lupin sat forward very interested. It wasn't often Dumbledore shared stories.
After Voldemort's first demise Snape was finally free
from his bonds. Although both he and I knew that
Voldemort wasn't really dead we couldn't convince any
one else in the wizarding community and settled down
here at Hogwarts to teach. He wasn't readily accepted,
as you can imagine. Being a death eater seemed to
matter more to some than his working for us during the
battles.
I had gone to a meeting at the Ministry; Minerva and
Louise had joined me. They learned a bit more about
Snape's service then and resolved to be nicer, pleasant
around him instead of so cold.
We'd stopped for lunch at the Leaky Cauldron and Tom had
a fresh plate of divinity he'd put on the table. I nicked a
piece and wrapped it in a napkin to bring back with me,
to eat later with my tea.
When we returned there had been some sort of row
between the staff, mostly the staff against Severus. He
had gone into my study, which was perfectly all right, but
some people took exception to it. Dumbledore stopped to sip tea and chuckle.
Dunderheads thought they could take on Snape. They
should be glad he is opposed to killing; even hurting
another bothers him greatly after years watching the
tortures. Severus sustained a few hexes but managed to
de-wand the lot of them before he locked himself in his
rooms. I went down to the dungeons to see how he was
and retrieve the wands.
We didn't talk about the row; there didn't seem to be any
point to it. I charmed the hexes off him and he gave me
all the wands back. For whatever reason zipped through
my brain at the time I reached into my pocket and found
the piece of divinity. Here,' I told him, I thought you might
like a little treat,' and said something about picking it up
at the pub. He was very appreciative, especially for
Severus. He mumbled something about saving it for his
tea.
Did you straighten the rest of the staff out? Lupin interjected.
Oh, yes. Minerva actually got them all in hand and berate
the heck out of them. They were all quite cowed by the
time I started returning wands. But that isn't the end of
the divinity. He nursed that piece of candy along for a
week, cutting a bit off at a time. I was a little surprised
when Minerva and I went down to his office a week later
to ask about a potion or something. It was sitting on a
small plate and he covered it up when we came in.
A week? I gather it wasn't a very big piece to start
with since you were surprised, Lupin commented.
No, just a square. Enough for a mug of tea. Minerva has
a terrible sweet tooth, almost rivals yours, the headmaster's eyes twinkled with silent laughter. Lupin blushed slightly.
and she sniffed that divinity out. You don't mind, do you?'
she asked and popped the entire piece left into her mouth.
I have never seen a more devastated look in my life. I really
thought he was going to cry. But being Snape he pushed
up from the desk and turned away from us, effectively
hiding his face. He moved some bottles around while I
told him what we needed and he said he'd take care of
it. Turned very cold. He and I had developed a good
friendship but this simple action completely cut him off.
He'd been attacked by the entire staff and it didn't bother
him at all. One piece of candy and he couldn't cope. I
managed to get Minerva out without any trouble. She was
completely oblivious to his drastic change of mood. I got
back to the dungeons awhile later. It was very apparent
he'd cried. But he was busying himself brewing the potion
for us and didn't say anything when I came in. I just sat on
the low stool and watched him. Sometimes it helps, just
being nearby. He doesn't need much interaction, but he
doesn't like being alone as much as he pretends. When
I tried to bring it up, he snarled something about it being
just a piece of stupid candy. I retorted saying but it was
your piece of stupid candy'. He just drooped, yes, it was
mine. and he moved away from the cauldron and
would have left if I hadn't stopped him. He tried to break
away saying he was just a nasty, selfish ass but I wouldn't
let him go until I calmed him down. He admitted he didn't
often get candy, much less a gift of any sort, and it hurt
when Minerva ate it. He tried to laugh it off, his being so
selfish and all. But I just held on until he stopped. I've
been very careful about giving him things since. That's
why he told you he was being selfish' because he probably
wanted to grab the tin of sweets and keep it from you.
I'd already teased him and snagged a lemon cream.
He'd eaten one piece and even shared it with Harry,
Hermione and Ron which was a huge ordeal, I'm sure.
You, and he wagged a finger smiling,
can plow through sweets faster than a rabbit through
carrots. He wanted to share, but you exceeded his
capacity. He probably left because he was tired and didn't
want to get into an argument. Especially one where he'd
act more irrational than normal.
Lupin sat quietly thinking about the candy and Snape.
Don't feel bad, Remus, even he admits it's irrational, Dumbledore said gently.
No, I just wonder what happened to him. Some long past
hurt he has never healed from, I'm sure. I will remember to
restrain myself around his sweets because you are right,
Lupin grinned,
I could definitely eat the entire tray without a second
thought.
Dumbledore just smiled and refrained comment. He knew enough about Snape to understand why he acted much of the way he did. Including this particular incidence. He wasn't going to nonchalantly share it with anyone. If Snape wanted to explain his past, then Snape would. This one story wouldn't betray any confidences and would help Lupin be a better friend.

Snape wandered out around 8:30, a bit groggy but mobile. He went to the table and Lupin stood up, holding the chair.
I'm off to teach. See you around lunch, Severus, he pushed the chair closer to the table and kissed the Potions Master on the top of his head. Confused, he managed to mumble goodbye' before accepting a hot mug of tea from Dumbledore.
I'm not sure I understood that, he said sleepily.
Don't worry about it, Severus. He's just glad you're up
and about on your own, he reached over and ran a small silver bell which summoned Dobby for more breakfast.
Snape's day was spent reading, resting and finally going over his and Pomfrey's lesson plans. He was pleased to see she'd been very thorough covering basic healing potions with each class and had even taken in consideration the abilities of each age group. He took a moment to write an owl to her actually being pleasant, thanking her for the considerations. He also mentioned he would still need her teaching as the doctor had not released him for a full teaching load. He indicated he'd try Tuesday afternoon, following her plans and then Wednesday and Friday afternoons if allowed, again following her plans. He or the Headmaster would let her know over the weekend regarding the following week. He gave the note to Dobby who was delighted to be his go-fer'.
Dobby was always delighted, Snape thought. Always bouncy. He stared out the windows over the grounds beginning to show the definite signs of spring musing about the house elf's happy nature. He'd been Malfoy's servant for ever, since birth. He'd been punished and abused and caused to do horrendous things in that dark, evil home. In fact, the only time Dobby wasn't bouncy' was if Draco was anywhere nearby. Then the ears drooped and the usually squeaky voice dropped to a harsh whisper. How could he be so unreserved? Happy Snape could understand, to be away from the darkness and working for someone as kind and light as Albus Dumbledore. But ecstatic? He wondered.
Would he become so happy? So bouncy when the dark lord was overthrown for good? Could Severus Snape actually be as delighted as that elf? He shook his head slightly. He'd been in the darkness far too long. He'd probably just be killed by one side or the other, especially if Malfoy or Moody had their way.
knut for your thoughts, child, came a soft voice. Snape stretched back into his chair and grinned sheepishly looking into his Mentor's eyes.
Not worth that much, Albus. Idle speculations of a Death
Eater, he said self-deprecatingly.
Worth every galeon in my vault, Dumbledore replied with warmth, allowing himself to brush Snape's hair gently back, off his face.
Just wondering how it would feel to be as happy as
Dobby, he blushed slightly and turned away, again taking in the glorious day spread before them. Dumbledore had the good grace not to answer too quickly or all-knowing.
I suspect, he said, pouring out fresh tea for the two of them,
it would be a little like a dose of that energy potion, but
permanent.
Snape chuckled, Yes, that may be close to the mark.
Just not quite so sleepy.
Dumbledore smiled in agreement and sat to sip tea and join Snape in reviewing the spring day.
A short while later they were walking in that spring scene. Dumbledore felt a walk would be pleasant enough and that Snape needed to test his legs. Most students were in class and the few they met were courteous. It was a rare treat, in fact, not to have to share the garden and lawn with the riot of youth.
Making it to the lake, Dumbledore selected a bench in the sun and sized up Snape. He looked fine, not strained in the least. Color had returned to face and the dark circles were nearly gone from under his eyes. Snape even swirled around once in his borrowed robes before settling down next to his friend.
You must love turning corners in this robe, Albus, he sighed, arranging the cloth about him.
I couldn't get away with wearing anything so much fun.
Dumbledore merely chuckled, glad he was able to play in them for a short time at least. The giant squid noted the Headmaster was near and broke the surface, sending out a long tentacled arm. The older man ran his hand over the slick appendage, cooing soft words. Snape tentatively touched the beast, sending a ripple down into the water. The end of the limb lifted and gently touched Snape's face while he sat perfectly still. With a splosh' the arm retracted under the surface and the squid slowly sank into the depths.
You've always had the neatest pets, Headmaster, he teased the older man.
Pet? I always had the impression I was the pet, he laughed aloud.
They wandered around the edge of the lake, turning back when dinner time neared.
We'll eat in the hall tonight, Severus. Let the Slytherins
know their House Head is up and about.
You just want to show off your latest project, he snarled,
trying to convert a death eater. Dumbledore stared at him a moment when a flurry of robes caught his attention. Draco Malfoy and his little gang hurried from around the corner. He watched as the three boys fawned around the Potions Master and he was edged out.
Dinner, Professor Snape, he said sharply, getting a cold look in return.
Then back upstairs. I will not have you over-exert
yourself yet again, he turned, slightly angry, and walked up the stairs into the hall. Damn. He should have expected the students would find him out. Malfoy probably had snitches all over from his own house. He knew that Snape could handle dinner and get back upstairs, he just hoped they wouldn't be dealing with one of the more annoying set of hexes when they got there.
A hush fell over the hall when Snape entered. He walked purposefully to his house's table and greeted his students. Snatches of conversation rose slowly until the hall was again filled with young voices waiting for dinner. He lingered a bit, granting his attention to some of his more exuberant' students. A little time now would curtail a lot of potential problems. He was sure to give darting, angry looks at a few staff members as the students filled him in on problems during the past week. His harshness seemed to soothe them and the Slytherin table settled down quietly when dinner began to appear.
He moved to the head table taking his normal chair next to Dumbledore. McGonagall and Sprout sat across this time, attempting to hold a conversation. Snape was distant, cool, but not rude. Making small talk was not something he would be interested in. He did ask about his students, mentally noting any problems that were brought up.
Dumbledore, on the other hand, was his bright and vibrant self. He easily conversed with the staff near him relating the giant squid's visit. Snape sat up straighter, rather disgusted by the retelling. Rather disgusted by the entire event.
Slimy beast. He is too dangerous a creature to have
around these children, he glanced at Dumbledore before sipping some juice.
Now, Severus, this is my pet we're talking about. He's
harmless!
The look on Snape's face belied that belief. He refrained from speaking further on the point. He knew where he was sleeping that night. At least, that was how most of the listeners perceived the look to mean.
Best watch his mouth, Sinistra whispered to Pomfrey, who nodded in agreement. Although Pomfrey was a little uncomfortable. She'd gotten Snape's note and it had been very nice. It was hard to resolve the note and the live person. Maybe the Headmaster had encouraged the note. But even then, Snape had a way of twisting words so they looked to say one thing but actually meant quite another. She glanced at the missive in her hand one more time. It seemed very straightforward. She pushed it deep into a pocket and returned to her meal. No use showing Sinistra. She'd rip it apart and make it sound like a threat for ruining his classes. Pomfrey glanced at the Astronomy teacher. She really hated Snape, to the point she wouldn't enter the staff room if he were in it except for a compulsory staff meeting.
At least Snape was rarely in the staff room!

Snape was first to leave, his stamina was dwindling and he knew he had all those bloody stairs to climb. Which he made a point of saying as he ground out his good nights. Lupin watched as Sinistra dropped her napkin and followed him out. Curious, he made his excuses and went after them.
Since he was close to the full moon, his senses were heightened. He could smell both Snape and Sinistra trail. He wondered how far the astronomy teacher would follow the Potions Master.
Turning an ear he heard Snape's definite steps; he was tired because he noted the slight drag. Sinistra's tread had lightened, almost difficult to hear. He was one turn back when he heard Snape stop, near the entry to the Headmaster's stairs. He was waiting.
Show yourself, I hear your breathing, Snape said sharply. Lupin stopped and heard Sinistra's pace slow, then stop. He peered around the corner and saw the woman's back. She'd put herself behind a convenient statue and had her wand out.
Snape drew his wand and murmured a charm. But instead of pointing it down the hallway, he ran the wand over his own body. Lupin could just make him out in the shadows cast by the statue guarding Dumbledore's door. Frowning, he pulled out his own wand. Was Snape cursing himself? Was it all some huge deception and Snape was really Voldemort's spy?
But then why was Sinistra following him? Hmmmm. This one bore waiting and watching. Snape stared down the hall a full minute before he turned back to the doorway. He was fully exposed to Sinistra. She pulled her wand back and twirled the tip moving her lips and then sent the curse straight at Snape.
Lupin was ready to jump out and protect his friend, but he didn't have to move. The curse flew down the hallway and hit Snape in the middle of the back. It then bounced backwards and streaked back on its original line hitting Sinistra full in the face. Snape walked through the portal without looking back.
Sinistra fell to her knees vomiting.
Cool! Lupin grinned and walked down the hallway towards the doorway.
Good Evening, Professor, he said sincerely to Sinistra as he passed by. He made it to the doorway and went up the stairs. The vomiting professor paused to glare at the retreating back. Damned werewolf!