alt9


Alternate Routes
Chapter 9

Perfecting Roles

Snape managed to pull himself into the headmaster's office before he slid down to the floor. Rather stupid to waste his energy on that idiot. But then, there was the pleasure in hearing Sinistra vomiting. A thin smile played on his lips.
Of course, now he had to drag himself to the couch and act casual until bedtime. Dumbledore would be furious if he found him flat on the floor. He breathed deeply and studied the ceiling. He never realized there were patterns up there. He studied the concentric circles.
The door flew open and Lupin came hurrying in laughing.
gods, Sev that was......ooof!! the DADA professor tripped over the lounging man and hit the ground flat on his stomach. He quickly rolled to his side and crawled back to Snape.
Severus! Are you ok? What happened? worried, Lupin pulled him up onto his lap.
I was fine, he huffed, rubbing his side, until some idiot
caught me in the ribs. Lupin ran his hand down Snape's side sending healing energy into the abused area. Snape tried to push him away.
It's ok, Remus. Save your energy for the moon! He managed to grip Lupin's hand in his own and halt the energy flow.
I went for a walk with Albus before dinner and I was a little
tired from that so I decided to go up to rest. I realized
I was being followed back to the rooms. I knew it wasn't
you so I used a shielding charm to protect myself. It takes
a lot of energy to set the shield, he smiled softly
but damn, it was worth it!
Lupin chuckled and looked at the man in admiration.
Shielding charms are difficult to cast, let alone maintain,
I know, I know, Snape yawned and leaned against Lupin's shoulder. Lupin ran a comforting hand down his back and then began to move him to the couch, levitating the semi-limp body.
Let me get some sleep clothes, and he left Snape in mid air.
Dumbledore walked in shaking his head. Poor Professor Sinistra! She seemed to have some reaction to something she ate at dinner. At least Dobby would clean up the debris. Pomfrey had offered to help the ill witch and freed him to return to his rooms.
Looking over towards the couch, he immediately saw Snape floating. Curious, he wandered over to the professor and peered into his face.
Just hanging around? he ask with a smile. Snape turned his head to more easily see the Headmaster.
Lupin. Lupin wants to play dress-up.
You look uncommonly tired, even for you, Severus, he said with a hint of concern.
Oh, I don't feel as tired. I played a little joke on Professor
Sinistra, and he smiled at the visual. Dumbledore frowned. What did the wizard think he was doing? That vomiting hex was not a joke' and he launched into lecturing him about hurting other people. Snape's face fell, Dumbledore wouldn't let him break into the lecture. No anger, only guilt at causing such disappointment in Dumbledore's eyes. In midair he curled up into a semi-fetal position as he listened to the tones and not the words of the lecture.
Lupin returned, cheerfully shaking out leggings and shirt. He stopped short when he saw Snape's position. He turned to look at Dumbledore's face and saw the disapproval. The one-sided conversation had stopped as soon as he had gotten close so he didn't know what had been said.
Silently Snape shrugged out of the robe and clothing, allowed Lupin to pull on clean leggings and shirt.
Let me down, I'm going to bed, he said with a defeated tone. Lupin lowered him and watched as first Snape lifted his hand towards Dumbledore; the Headmaster turned around and went towards his desk. Snape's hand fell and he trudged into the bedroom closing the door.
Looking right at the closed door, then left at the silent older wizard, Lupin chose to try the Headmaster first.
So, what did I miss? he asked carefully. Dumbledore did not look up.
You saw Professor Sinistra in the hallway? there was an edge to his voice, an anger.
Well, yes. It's hard to miss someone vomiting, he replied crisply.
He shouldn't have thrown that hex, Dumbledore ground out. We've talked about revenge and retribution. I thought he
was above it.
Lupin was momentarily confused, then he figured it out,
You think Severus threw the hex?
Yes, he did. He said he played a joke' on Sinistra. He
knows damned well how I feel about those kinds of
he added darkly.
Lupin looked at him shocked,
But Albus, he didn't throw any curses or hexes at Professor
Sinistra! Dumbledore looked up now confused.
But he said...
He said he played a joke. Not a hex. He covered himself
with a shielding charm. Pretty sophisticated and it took
more energy than he should have used. When Sinistra
threw the hex at him it bounced back and hit her. She
hexed herself, Albus. He didn't.
Dumbledore's face fell as he realized what he had done. Lupin put his hand on his shoulder.
I thought he'd been cursing himself for a minute, when I
saw him charm himself. I thought he was on Voldemort's
side, a double agent playing us for fools. You're not alone
in thinking the worse about Snape.
But I'm his closest friend. I should know better.
You're human. He'd been his charming' death eater
self at dinner. If you think it's hard to bounce back and
forth from acting to reality, how do you think Severus feels?
I think the only constant for him is you.
sighed Dumbledore, that makes me feel better, his voice thick with sarcasm.
He must understand, Albus. He's been at this game too
long with you not to know how hard it has become.
Nodding Dumbledore looked at the bedroom door.
You'll excuse me? he asked as he moved around towards the door.
I'll see you in the morning, Lupin squeezed his shoulder and headed for his own rooms.

Dumbledore paused at the edge of the doorway. The bed was empty. He glanced around the room until he spied a dim shape in the corner curled against the wall. An exhausted face was slack in sleep. He was reminded of a injured predator trying to seek the safest haven. The corner protected his back but little else.
Pulling the covers back, he levitated the sleeping Potions Master into bed. He changed into his own sleeping shirt and crawled in after him. Snape was limp, absolutely out. Carefully the Headmaster arranged the body over his, making sure the sleeping man's ear was on his chest, head snugged under his chin.
Slowly the chill dissipated and in his sleep Snape curled tightly against the warmth. Taking a firm hold on his much maligned friend, Dumbledore fell asleep.
He was awaken hours later as Snape tried unsuccessfully to remove himself from his grasp.
Severus? Where are you going? he tightened his hold and pulled him back.
It appears nowhere, he answered quietly. A slight tremor was quickly tamped down.
I'm sorry I disappointed you, Headmaster, he offered, the slight tremor was now in his voice and he cursed his weakness.
Dumbledore drew him close, brushing a kiss on his forehead.
Child, you have done nothing wrong. I am the one
who asks forgiveness. I was very quick to judge you and
unfairly at that, Dumbledore said quietly.
You have every right to mistrust me, Headmaster, Snape replied, fighting the tears.
No, I do not, he pulled him back onto his chest to listen to his heart beat, slowly running a light hand over the man's back.
You have always been truthful to me. Even when you've done something you're ashamed of you've told me and I've
never known you to hurt someone for fun.
Snape sighed.
You fell into your role perfectly, you know, Severus. I
can see why Dr. Barnes thought you so formidable.
Snape smiled miserably,
I'm good at being a heartless bastard. Lots of practice, and fell silent again, listening to the soothing heart beat. Dumbledore continued to run gentle circles over his back.
Sleep, child. I love you, he stoked hair from his face, holding it back lightly against the resting man's shoulder.
Love you too, Albus, he whispered, nestled tightly in that secure place.

In the morning Snape woke easily, feeling rested. He rose and showered dressing in another set of borrowed robes. These were deep green, nearly black, with dragons along the edges. He mused over the little beasts moving and breathing flames. Where did Albus find such wonderful robes?
Lupin stood when he came out and hugged him, received a strange look for that from the recovering patient. But Lupin just snickered and poured out tea for him, passing the toast and eggs. He ate lightly. Dumbledore pushed a protein shake towards him.
You need to eat more; these are loaded with calories
and vitamins and take little room in that stomach of yours.
I expect you to have another before lunch.
The tone was serious and Snape sighed
Yes Headmaster, he said morosely, lifting the tall glass
he drank deeply, licking off the resultant vanilla mustache. He snagged a section of the Daily Prophet and began reading the latest news. Lupin pushed up and left to teach, merely patting Snape on the shoulder. Another kiss might earn him a bop on the nose.
Abandoning the paper, Snape returned the one mystery to the shelves and nosed around for another book. He did not want a spy novel, something which Albus had several copies of at hand. Another by this American writer, Hillerman, might be nice. Dumbledore was right, it was nothing like the current affairs they were embroiled in. Plus he found Leaphorn an interesting character.
Upon asking, Dumbledore left his rumination of daily events and societal notes and pulled a couple paperbacks off the shelf. Checking publication dates, Snape chose the older book and thanked his friend. He curled up in the lounge and lost himself in the mystery.
At some point a protein shake appeared, strawberry and banana mix. He drank it slowly and managed to finish it before it melted. He had flipped the book over and was napping when Dr. Barnes arrived. Dumbledore let him in and quietly waved him to the desk.
He's just dozed off, probably working on the second
protein shake.
smiled Barnes, he needs to build up his system.
Shifting, the doctor reached into his satchel and pulled out the medical charts for Snape. He'd noted that since the new ministry doctor appeared in the records injections had become standard operating procedures whenever he'd gone in ill. Most of them weren't necessary.
Here's his records, he said and I'd like to keep on being
his primary doctor, if that's ok with you. I know you have
Pomfrey here and there is a small additional cost of supplies,
but I rather enjoy working with him, he gave a lopsided grin trying to avoid talking about the real reasons he wanted Snape as his own patient. If Dumbledore thought it hero worship, that was just fine by him.
But Albus Dumbledore did not achieve his position in life by being easily tricked. He looked at the seemingly innocuous file and then at the puppy-like smile of Barnes.
So, what did you find in the files, Dr. Barnes, he asked curiously.
Oh, not much, you tend to handle him quite well; very little
is noted, he hedged.
Mmm hmmm, the Headmaster's eyes now bore into the
much younger man's. What is noted?
Barnes licked his seemingly dry lips and adverted his eyes.
There seems to be a lot of follow-up treatment that
requires injectibles. Not that there's anything wrong with
that, but there are other preps just as effective,
or more so, Dumbledore broke in.
Or more so, agreed Barnes.
pressed the older man.
And I have no proof whatsoever there's been any cruelty
in the treatment process, but, he looked over to be certain Snape was actually asleep and out of earshot. The man in question turned slightly, burrowing into the pillow oblivious of time or place.
But based on observation I'd say the patient was subject
to a low level of abuse at the hands of both the nurse and
the substitute physician from the ministry. He demonstrated
a great fear of needles, which I felt rather odd given the
extremes he's been subject to over the years. Upon
displaying my syringes for cattle he indicated they were
the type used on him, he suddenly rubbed his eyes.
Those large bores have left slight scars on his upper
arms and thighs. I can't prove it, it's his word against
them and their pristine records, but I'd rather take care
of him when you can't. Mostly because I detest abuse,
but also because I really do like him.
Dumbledore glanced at Snape, the file and finally rested his eyes on the doctor. He was right, there was no use in going after either practitioner because it was a known death eater's word against theirs. The idea of abuse' would be laughed out of court because it was only needles, not something important.
That sounds acceptable, Dr. Barnes. As long as I can
get hold of you in a reasonable amount of time, he began.
I'll get you a direct message line. the doctor bounced in.
You only need to send a message to me at the clinic and I'll
come right up or as soon as possible. You can even give
me an idea of what's wrong so I can bring the right
equipment.
Dumbledore's interest was piqued.
Direct message line? That sounds rather like
muggle-magic, he smiled.
It is. Arthur Weasley figured it out in his spare time
and we were his test subjects. It is actually easier than
trying to apparate to the clinic. And quicker and cleaner
than owls coming in and out. All the homes and businesses
in Hogsmeade are hooked up by something called a low-
frequency wave. A lot of the outlying farms are, too. We'll
get you set up easily.
Trust Arthur to find useful muggle stuff, chuckled Dumbledore.
Hey, it comes with internet access, added Barnes. Dumbledore looked at him confused.
It's some international network of muggles. You can
find out all sorts of interesting things if you look. They
call it surfing the net'. I'm not sure what it's good for,
but dad got hooked on something called and the
. He confers with other doctors, magical and
muggle world-wide. He seems to find some value in it.
Dumbledore looked suitably impressed, although still a bit doubtful about the surfing' part. A line into the clinic could be useful at times. Running down the road before being able to apparate was a problem at times. Even using a broom took time that was sometimes precious to begin with.
I'll call up lunch while you tend to your patient, Doctor, Dumbledore smiled and rang for Dobby.
Soon the three of them were sitting at table eating thick sandwiches and soup. The protein shake stood at ready by Snape's place.
Chocolate and almonds, he reported, after taking a long
sip. Barnes had been happy with his progress and cleared him to teach a few half-days. Dumbledore insisted he returned to his rooms afterwards to sleep.
I know you can manage, Severus, he said, but I want
certain individuals to think you are still weak. It's only
to your ultimate advantage.
Fortunately, Snape agreed readily enough. He felt better, but still wanted the security of these rooms. He would sleep and heal more quickly. He also didn't trust his luck in staving off additional curses with the shielding charms. They worked well, but they required a lot of energy.
Plus on Tuesday afternoons he had 5th year with Slytherins and Gryffindor. He would definitely need the soothing of these walls after dealing with that group!
Barnes himself walked Snape down to the dungeons, wanting to see where he taught. They walked into the dank, dark room with the cauldrons set out in a loose grid. A few students were just setting down their materials and glanced up as they entered.
A witch up at the front of the room was writing notes up on the blackboard. Snape heard Barnes draw in a sharp breath.
Madame Pomfrey, Snape said quietly, drawing her attention. She looked over at them and gave a quick smile.
Well, Professor Snape. You are looking better. Come to
pick up the reins this afternoon? she was pleased, no mistake there.
he said shortly. As you can see, my healer had
to see me down, the scowl on his face transmitted his disgust. Barnes smiled tightly and held out his hand.
Nurse Pomfrey, he said curtly.
So, you find our Potions Master as delightful as the rest
of us do, she said equally. Barnes was glad he could act angry, since he felt a great deal of it built up inside.
Oh, just charmed, he ground out. He then turned to Snape.
Remember, teach your class, hold your office hours, eat
dinner in the hall if you feel strong enough, and in any case
you return to the Headmaster's rooms to sleep tonight.
At a reasonable hour.
He looked at the sneer building on the man's face.
No later than 9:30, Professor. I will be checking on
you tomorrow morning.
Is that a threat, Doctor? the smile looked benign, but the tone was a growl.
If you want it to be, Professor. Teach well. Good day,
Nurse Pomfrey, Barnes nodded at them and walked out.
Pomfrey went over the two lessons for that afternoon. He nodded gruffly and watched as she left, promising to be back for the morning lecture and labs.
The next ninety minutes were grueling. Snape patrolled the cauldrons and preparation areas, criticizing the Gryffindor' work while praising the Slytherins. The only subtle difference Harry could discern was that Snape concentrated his criticism on Hermione instead of Neville. Although for all the smoke that was blown only twenty points were taken away (from Hermione for answering back disrespectfully) and 10 given (Goyle correctly shredded his roots for his potion).
As Snape leaned against his tall stool glaring at the departing students he considered running for the tower. Would it be considered weak if he hid under the bed? Fifth year between Malfoy and Potter would be the death of him. The first because he wanted Snape dead, the other because he wanted to save him. Oh, and add Granger. She was willing to draw detention, too. They needed some ground rules or he'd really give them detention. At the very least Weasley stayed out of it.
His brothers would more than make up for it on Friday. What was their latest project? Everything centered on gag potions for their business venture. He wondered how Pomfrey did with them last week; he'd barely survived the reformulation of the canary creams. (he secretly wanted to slip one to Albus) The ton tongue toffees required a lot of professor intervention when the timed formulae they were trying to develop didn't work. He had become tired of reversing the potion when test subjects began to choke. They'd actually offered to give him a cut of the business if he'd just help them make each gag safe. He was currently letting them try to convince him. It did sound like fun. gods knew he wanted to agree the first day they offered. Being a death eater certainly took all the fun out of his life. He supposed he could accept on the proviso he was a silent partner. He'd have to see what happened before they graduated.
Snape was ready to crawl upstairs and collapse. He looked at his office door. Maybe just crawl to his office. Dinner was nearly four hours off and he was sure there were enough Slytherins around to note where he went to. Dumbledore's rooms were out of the question and finally went into his office.
Two seventh-year students were waiting, wanting to confer over a potion to enhance ward charms. They were hoping to add an alarm that would signal the person who wove the charm. It was an interesting idea and over an hour slipped by as they looked over the basic ingredients and possible reactions to the additional ingredients they wanted to add. They left, grousing when they found out Snape would not be available for the morning class session on Friday.
Quiet again, he shelved the ingredients left over from the afternoon's lessons. He noted a few items to be reordered. He slipped back into his routines. It was almost frightening how quickly the Potions Master persona took over. He growled and threw himself down and opened the lesson planner.
He began to review what he'd wanted to cover against what had been taught. He'd have to drop a couple potions and demonstrate a few to show how to brew them. Of course, he no longer had to cover healing potions as thoroughly and reached for his favorite potions guide.
Dobby woke him nearly two hours later. Good thing; he would have been late for dinner. With robes billowing behind he climbed up out of the dungeons and swept through the great hall taking his place at the head table. Dumbledore was not happy at all, although he hid this from the majority of the room with his rather amused smile.
Snape attempted to not enter into a discussion with anyone at the table. He was too tired to keep up a facade long. Unfortunately, the Headmaster wished to share his good will' and began to ask about his day.
It went well, Headmaster, he answered quietly, picking up his spoon.
Ah, I'm sure it did, Severus. Did you encounter any
difficulties? again the force cheer. Snape sipped at the soup before him.
None that I couldn't handle, Headmaster, he bit the words off, anger simmering.
Really? What were those, he drilled into Snape. Snape sat up straight and reached for his napkin.
Headmaster, only the difficulties one encounters with
children; proper preparation problems, some minor
disasters putting the potion together in its proper order.
Nothing of grave concern, Snape wiped his mouth and reached for a piece of bread hoping the conversation was over.
I noted Gryffindor lost some points, I gather Longbottom
failed somehow? there was a hint of threat in the voice.
No, Headmaster, he managed nearly politely, Ms. Granger
had difficulty keeping a civil tongue about herself. I do
not tolerate disrespect.
a knowing glare. What was Albus playing at? Snape was too tired to try to figure it out in public. He dropped the bread back on its plate.
Really, Headmaster. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have work
to do before retiring, the Potions Master in full snit stood and stalked out of the hall. He walked through connecting hallways and realized he could not return to his own rooms. As he turned towards Dumbledore's rooms a familiar, and not welcome, feeling enveloped his body. SHIT! He had been so wrapped up in being driven from dinner he didn't think about being cursed.
Swallowing the bile rising in his throat, he managed to open the door and climb onto the moving stairs. He quickly opened the door and crossed the room but did not quite make it to the loo, launching the little bit of food in his stomach out and onto the borrowed robes.
He curled around the basin, feeling his muscles spasm as he retched, flushing to make the last remnants swirl down. Now he just had to wait a few minutes for the worst of the spasms to cease and he could clean up. He kicked off boots, thankfully spared from splatter, then began opening the clasps on the robes.
Sorry little dragons, he whispered ruefully to the miniature beasts that continued to blow their pretend fire. These were tossed into the clothes basket.
Quickly, he leaned back over the porcelain receptacle and lost a little more. As the muscles clenched he wondered exactly how much was left. Not a lot. He wiped the residual on his shirt sleeve. Then pulled the shirt off. Noting his hand was shaking he scooted over to the bath tub instead of trying to stand. gods he hated this hex. Reaching over the side he started the water and then resettled on the floor, listening to the soothing sounds of pouring water.
Lupin came into Dumbledore's rooms. Albus had keyed him in to his plan of driving Snape up into the rooms as quickly as possible. There had been some concern from Pomfrey that a few staff members were going to hex him again. She had mentioned it in passing to the Headmaster, offered no names or explanations. Which led to the quick decision to simply push Snape into retreat. It was easy enough, the man had left nearly immediately.
Not seeing Snape in the main room he went into the bedroom and found it empty too. Which left the lavatory. He opened the door and spied Snape, eyes closed, leaning against the cool of the enamel as the water filled the tub. The lingering tell-tale scent let Lupin know he'd been hit even with their precautions. He leaned over the silent body and turned the taps off.
Hi Severus! he said cheerfully, pulling out his wand. Snape nodded not trusting himself to open his mouth.
Finitum incatantum! Lupin brought the wand down hard and was rewarded with a shimmering cloud of gray. He dispatched it without a hitch.
he again ran his wand over the lagging form. A second cloud rose and was quickly dispatched. He put his wand back into his pocket and checked the limp body, pulling Snape's head back. He was rewarded with a sneer and two tired eyes doing their best to glare at him.
he just managed to snarl out.
Hey, Sev, having fun?
I was having a bath, Lupin, he growled. Although the sneer slid into a tired frown.
Better take these off first, Lupin removed socks and helped him stand, stripping his leggings off. Carefully Snape was put into the tub.
Now, you just rest here a bit. I'll go see Dobby about
more dinner, he fixed a towel behind Snape's neck so he'd be more comfortable.
I am hungry, Snape said grudgingly. As disgusting as
that may seem.
Not disgusting, from what I've seen, your stomach is empty!
Snape just glared then closed his eyes to relax into the warmth of the tub. Lupin left the door wide open as he went out.