Everyone, but one person. He remained inside, looking out the window. Much as he had felt his whole life. Except this time, he was not on the outside - looking in.
He was trapped within an inner prison, looking out.
The glass started to distort, as did the outside world. Blue sky became gray, the people outside nothing more then mere shades. The town of Balamb became a wasteland, all within the space of a minute. And then... she appeared. The woman who had caused all this. Black wings arched gracefully as she walked forward to Seifer. Ruby hued lips turned upwards at the corners, gold eyes taking him, drowning him within her.
~Seifer - You will never be free.~
Seifer awoke with a gasp, reaching up with a trembling hand to wipe away the sweat that had formed on his brow. That damned dream again. He grabbed the bottle on his nightstand, gulping down the amber liquid.
Will you, walk me... To the edge again...
Shaking, lonely, and I am drinking again...
Woke up tonight and no one's here with me...
I'm giving in to you...
The nightmare had been plaguing him for the past few evenings. Even though it had been a month since her defeat. Rinoa was the new Sorceress, and Squall was her Knight. So why were the dreams haunting him? His bondage had been ended at her death. Unless she hadn't actually died. Emerald eyes widened at that thought. He couldn't go through that again.
Take me under, I'm giving in to you...
I'm dying tonight, I'm giving in to you...
He buried his face in his hands, chills racking his body. If she hadn't died, then he could fall under her influence again any minute. Then no one would be safe, even his friends.
Watch me crumble...I'm giving in to you...
I'm crying tonight, I'm giving in to you...
They had all tried to save him from himself. Edea, Quistis... Even Squall. He had been at the orphanage for the past two weeks, with Matron trying numerous spells to help battle his inner demon. But his guilt could not be erased, and he knew why. Because a part of her, lived on in him. If he ever fathered a child, he *knew* it would be a girl. And she would inherit all of her powers.
Why had he so longed to be a Knight? Why had he cursed himself to this?
Caught up, in life... Losing all my friends...
Family has tried, to heal all my addictions...
Tragic it seems, to be alone again...
I'm giving in to you...
He let his hands fall to his sides, then tore off the thin cotton sheet that had covered him. He rose, making sure to grab the bottle of whiskey. He then exited the bedroom, going down the stone steps to the beach.
The water here soothed him. The color was almost the same light shade of Quistis' eyes. He had finally admitted to her how he felt, just three nights ago. And of his jealously of Squall, whom she had liked, while he liked her. But now, looking at it wasn't helping him. Instead, the ebon waters reminded him a bit too much of someone else.
Take me under, I'm giving in to you...
I'm dying tonight, I'm giving in to you...
And as a ghost, the figure appeared before him once again. But not proud, as she had been. No, she was wounded, and in need of help. Her black wings were tattered, one broken and misshapen. She was limping towards him, one hand held out, beseeching his help.
He flinched, taking a step backwards without knowing it, but another figure appeared. A woman in black... Matron?! Was he seeing the past? She went towards the broken woman, and took her hand. A strange aura surrounded them both, and the woman in red disappeared. Matron turned, eyes glowing with power.
~You saw the boy in black with the sword. You saw how he drew his sword, even though I was already gone in body. And you swore, to protect me from him...
And you failed me... Twice.~
Boy in black with the sword. Squall had seen this as a child, he recalled him telling him what it had been like to be lost. They had both been. But Siefer trusted Fujin and Raijin, and so had found his way. Squall had seen what he had just seen, and had seen himself a child.
Seifer now remembered the vow he had made. To protect that woman, and Matron. From that older boy in black. At this, a sudden wave of pain hit him, and he sank to his knees in the sand.
Watch me crumble, I'm giving in to you...
I'm crying tonight, I'm giving in to you...
Crystal tears traced a path down his cheeks, as let loose a cry of mental anguish. His childish vow, had been that... but she had held him to it.
~Will you be a boy? Or will you be a man?~
(Oh fuck)
I look forward, to dying tonight...
Drink till I'm myself, life's harder every day...
The stress has got me...
He raised his head upon hearing her voice, and shivered at her closeness to him once again. His blood was calling for him to go to her, to embrace her. To be one with her. As though it would defend him somehow, he lifted the bottle of whiskey, and then smashed it against one of the stones littered around on the beach.
~You think that will harm me Seifer? You are my Knight... You can *not* kill me.~
I'm giving in....
"Stay away from me..." She moved closer.
Giving...
~Come to me, Seifer.... Our pain is one.~
The hand holding the jagged edge of bottle faltered, and he cursed inwardly as she took another step closer. She was calling him again, luring him with her Siren's song.
Giving in...
There was only one way to end this. He looked at her, and she smiled, reaching out to press her fingers against his flesh.
NOO!!
"Your pain, your failure, is your own."
Seifer snarled, jamming the edge of the glass into his left wrist. Thin lines of red appeared, and he ripped it back out, flinging the neck of the bottle into the ocean. He whispered softly, "reflect." before allowing the sky to fall onto him. Ultimetica screamed as he fell forward, and through her arms.
Take me under (I'm killing all the pain)...
I'm dying tonight (I'm sick of all this pain)...
Watch me crumble (I'm killing all the pain)...
I'm crying tonight...
Seifer jerked awake, then looked at his left wrist. Nothing. He took a cautious glance around, noting that someone was snuggled against his side, and a slim arm was draped around his waist.
He glanced to his right, eyes widening, as he didn't see gold hair as expected. Instead, the woman's hair was of spun moonlight. Her eyes opened, crossed between gold and blue.
"I was afraid I'd lost you, Seifer. I was afraid that I lost me. But I see now, you can never forgo your vow. It made you what you are, and it made us...."
Then her eyes narrowed slightly. "If you ever try a stunt like that again, I'll let you bleed to death, Understand?"
Seifer said nothing, and closed his eyes again. He had failed them all. Again. He felt something damp against his cheeks, and then dropped once again into a dreamless sleep.
I'm giving in to you, Take me under...
I'm giving in to you; I'm dying tonight...
I'm giving in to you...
Watch me crumble, I'm giving in to you...
I'm crying tonight, I'm giving in to you...
Take me under...
I'm giving in to you; I'm dying tonight...
I'm giving in to you...
------
A/N - I was listening to this song last night, and started thinking about Seifer. About him giving into her. But, I didn't want to do an in-game one about them, rather I wanted one where she still resides in his memory. And maybe a possible reason as to why she choose him, and not Squall in the beginning. I think that being under someone's spell for that long, would warp someone's mind, and leave a residue of the caster there. And so... that idea gave birth to this. Hope it was an engaging read.
Disclaimers: Square owns everyone portrayed within, lyrics - Adema: "Giving In."