Dear Geo
by ohfan007
author's note and disclaimer: this is a sequel to "But You're..." The characters do not belong to me, except for Sandy and Leila.(this Sandy is not the same one who is Frances's friend.)
"Dear Geo,
I love you. I am so sorry. You can't know how sorry I am. I need you, Geo, you are my strength. I do not deserve you though, you deserve so much better. I have hurt you so much, and put you through so much. You need someone to be your rock, your pillar of strength. Instead, you get stuck with people who become dependent on you. You are the greatest, most humane person, I have ever known. The only thing you ever did to hurt me was to try to save people's lives through your work, as all the people working with you do. You don't deserve some person who never fully grew up, like me, you and your co-workers deserve medals. I have never loved anyone as much as I have you, Geo. You were always so sweet to me, and always, always there when I needed you. Please forgive me for failing you. This is so hard for me to write, and I am sure it will be hard for you to read this.
I am a coward. I am sorry. You are the greatest. Damn, this sounds like that spiel you always told me women gave you when they broke up with you. I don't want to give you that. I want to apologize for everything. We had such good times, and you were so good to me. I never realized how much you loved me, how good you were for me. You were my anchor. I cannot live without you. It is my own fault though, I pushed you away with all my affairs, and such. I could say, your passion was too strong for me, but that sounds like an excuse.
I was wrong. You always provided me with everything I wanted and everything I could ever need, and I was so proud of you.I am proud of you. You are the most wonderful, sensitive, passionate, loving, caring, giving person I know. I am sorry if I am sounding repeative. I need you to see. You were the only person I ever met who cared enough about me to remember my all-time favourite movie list, and why. Which I am sure you know that movies were important to me. You should have been more important to me, though, I put too many barriers in your way. Yet, in your sweet manner, you moved them aside, to show me multiple times, that you loved me, and wanted to be in my life. Yet, you respected my barriers, and let me have my obessesions that I thought were more important than you. They aren't even worth your weight in gold. They are not even good enough to weighted against your thumb ring. I found this out to late.
When you gave up women, almost a year after Julie's death, I figured it was my time to move in.You didn't need me.I should have remained just your friend.I, with my immaturity, complicated things when we became lovers.I felt when I first got the idea, we were kindred spirits, having both been straight at one time. I should of realized like I ruined it with Sandy, my dear ex-wife, I would ruin it with you. In the four years we were together I had twenty affairs. Twenty that is five every year almost. Your passion was always there, your deep concern, and I remember you once telling someone I was your best friend, I think it was your mom, when you were talking to her on the phone,once. I wanted you to be my best friend, and you tried repeatively to reach out to me, to get me to see we were life partners, and we needed each other.Yet, I still kept feeling I had to distance myself from you. I know you knew about the affairs, you are a genius, yet, you never said anything because you wanted me to know you were always there.You were my best friend, and yet, I made it seem as the opposite was true. I could have been your best friend, I should have been, but I had no concern over you.
You have such strong convictions, and I commend you for this. I wish I could say that I did. I have always only cared about myself.I am an idiot. I don't know what you saw in me. I shouldn't have brought you into my life as a lover. You needed someone better suited for you. Someone who would always be there for you, instead of going out and delibrately going behind your back.
Please forgive me for my transactions.
I want you to understand why I have to do this. I need you to understand. I don't deserve to live anymore. Maybe, you don't understand, and I will never be able to convience you, too. Please give Sandy my love, and tell her I am sorry, I was a bad husband, and I am sorry I was a bad father to Leila. Tell her I hope she finds someone to be a real father to the girl.
I love you, Geo, and I hope you are able to carry on. I hope you find someone who deeply loves you, and worships the ground you walk on. Someone who wasn't showing you kindness sometimes, to hide the fact they were seeing someone else.
Goodbye, my dear sweet Geo.
- Thank you so much for coming into my life,
Your little cupcake,
Rich."
by ohfan007
author's note and disclaimer: this is a sequel to "But You're..." The characters do not belong to me, except for Sandy and Leila.(this Sandy is not the same one who is Frances's friend.)
"Dear Geo,
I love you. I am so sorry. You can't know how sorry I am. I need you, Geo, you are my strength. I do not deserve you though, you deserve so much better. I have hurt you so much, and put you through so much. You need someone to be your rock, your pillar of strength. Instead, you get stuck with people who become dependent on you. You are the greatest, most humane person, I have ever known. The only thing you ever did to hurt me was to try to save people's lives through your work, as all the people working with you do. You don't deserve some person who never fully grew up, like me, you and your co-workers deserve medals. I have never loved anyone as much as I have you, Geo. You were always so sweet to me, and always, always there when I needed you. Please forgive me for failing you. This is so hard for me to write, and I am sure it will be hard for you to read this.
I am a coward. I am sorry. You are the greatest. Damn, this sounds like that spiel you always told me women gave you when they broke up with you. I don't want to give you that. I want to apologize for everything. We had such good times, and you were so good to me. I never realized how much you loved me, how good you were for me. You were my anchor. I cannot live without you. It is my own fault though, I pushed you away with all my affairs, and such. I could say, your passion was too strong for me, but that sounds like an excuse.
I was wrong. You always provided me with everything I wanted and everything I could ever need, and I was so proud of you.I am proud of you. You are the most wonderful, sensitive, passionate, loving, caring, giving person I know. I am sorry if I am sounding repeative. I need you to see. You were the only person I ever met who cared enough about me to remember my all-time favourite movie list, and why. Which I am sure you know that movies were important to me. You should have been more important to me, though, I put too many barriers in your way. Yet, in your sweet manner, you moved them aside, to show me multiple times, that you loved me, and wanted to be in my life. Yet, you respected my barriers, and let me have my obessesions that I thought were more important than you. They aren't even worth your weight in gold. They are not even good enough to weighted against your thumb ring. I found this out to late.
When you gave up women, almost a year after Julie's death, I figured it was my time to move in.You didn't need me.I should have remained just your friend.I, with my immaturity, complicated things when we became lovers.I felt when I first got the idea, we were kindred spirits, having both been straight at one time. I should of realized like I ruined it with Sandy, my dear ex-wife, I would ruin it with you. In the four years we were together I had twenty affairs. Twenty that is five every year almost. Your passion was always there, your deep concern, and I remember you once telling someone I was your best friend, I think it was your mom, when you were talking to her on the phone,once. I wanted you to be my best friend, and you tried repeatively to reach out to me, to get me to see we were life partners, and we needed each other.Yet, I still kept feeling I had to distance myself from you. I know you knew about the affairs, you are a genius, yet, you never said anything because you wanted me to know you were always there.You were my best friend, and yet, I made it seem as the opposite was true. I could have been your best friend, I should have been, but I had no concern over you.
You have such strong convictions, and I commend you for this. I wish I could say that I did. I have always only cared about myself.I am an idiot. I don't know what you saw in me. I shouldn't have brought you into my life as a lover. You needed someone better suited for you. Someone who would always be there for you, instead of going out and delibrately going behind your back.
Please forgive me for my transactions.
I want you to understand why I have to do this. I need you to understand. I don't deserve to live anymore. Maybe, you don't understand, and I will never be able to convience you, too. Please give Sandy my love, and tell her I am sorry, I was a bad husband, and I am sorry I was a bad father to Leila. Tell her I hope she finds someone to be a real father to the girl.
I love you, Geo, and I hope you are able to carry on. I hope you find someone who deeply loves you, and worships the ground you walk on. Someone who wasn't showing you kindness sometimes, to hide the fact they were seeing someone else.
Goodbye, my dear sweet Geo.
- Thank you so much for coming into my life,
Your little cupcake,
Rich."