For the Love of a Child
by Star Kindler
Chapter Three
Disclaimer: I don't own GW, never have and never will
Author's Note: Sorry it's taking so long to get this fic finished. Damn, has it really been nearly two months since my last update? I can't believe it. *sigh* I've had the worst case of writer's block for the past few months that refuses to go away…
Warnings: Yaoi, angst (?) and OOC
***
I glanced at the cloudy shower door and sighed as ran a brush through my hair. I could see Heero's blurry form standing still underneath the spray of water. He had been in there for the past half-hour; I don't understand why. After I finished telling him the news this evening, he actually seemed…dare I say it? He seemed happy – well, almost anyway. Now, I don't know what he was thinking or feeling. He had closed himself up in that shower for too long, now. I had to find out what he was doing.
"Heero? Are you almost finished?" I called out over the roar of the water.
No reply.
"Aw, Hee-chan, you're going to get waterlogged…"
Silence.
I set my brush aside, and approached the shower door. Casually, I knocked on it.
"You've been showering for a long time. Don't make me come in there after you, koi." This time I expected a smart comeback. Well, I didn't get what I expected, but surprisingly, he did respond.
"Hn."
It wasn't much of a reply, but it was enough for me to take a hint. So he wants to be left alone. I can handle that.
"All right Heero, stay in there the whole night for all I care. I'm going to bed." This time I heard nothing from him, so I turned and walked back to the bedroom. Crawling into bed, I stared at the bathroom entranceway, waiting patiently for Heero to emerge – he had to sooner or later. And I wasn't going to even attempt to fall asleep until I made sure he was all right. The thing with Ayanna was big – I wonder if I hurt his feelings by not telling him about her sooner? Now this was going to be bothering the hell out of me until I could talk to him.
Finally, after an eternity, I heard the water from the shower shut off. After a few more moments, Heero emerged clad in pajama pants. I eyed him as he walked across the room and sunk down on the bed.
"What took so long Heero?" I asked curiously.
He shrugged and laid down. I stared at him, shocked. Okay, so maybe I was more hurt. The least I deserved was an answer. I knew one thing; I wasn't going to go to sleep until he told me what he was thinking. I leaned over him, and waited for a reaction.
"Is there something you want, Duo?" He looked up at me emotionlessly.
"What – no goodnight kiss?" I smirked.
Much to my surprise he smiled back, pulled my head down, and pressed his lips against mine. Submitting to the kiss, I let him overpower me and pin me against the bed. His powerful arms felt so good around my body.
As the kiss ended, I felt a twinge of relief. "You aren't upset, Heero?" I asked, practically out of breath.
"About your daughter? I told you earlier, I wasn't." He paused for a moment, and it looked as if he were deep in thought. "Duo, I was thinking…maybe I shouldn't go with you tomorrow."
My mouth dropped open. I pushed him away and sat up on my elbows. "What the hell do you mean? You have to go – you have no choice. You have to get to know her sooner or later; why wait?"
He turned away from me. "I don't know anything about kids. I'll just be in the way; she's going to hate me."
Sympathy tugged at my heart. "Heero, she won't hate you. Give her a chance, you'll see."
He sat up, his eyes still downcast. "I don't think I want to go through with this."
That comment scared me. "What does that mean?" I asked fearfully.
"This is going to change everything – nothing will be the same."
He was making no sense whatsoever. "Heero…Oh god, you don't want me to choose between you and her, do you?
"No, I don't want you to do that." He turned back to me, his eyes full of confusion. "I don't even know what I'm saying. I've never felt these emotions before."
I smiled, hoping to offer some sort of comfort. "I understand, love. This is new to me, also, but I can't back down. And I said it earlier; I don't want to go through this without you. Please don't leave me…"
"I love you, Duo. I'm not going to leave." He sighed. "Alright, I'll go; but only for you. I have no idea what to expect." He ran his hand through his hair.
I laughed. "To tell you the truth, I don't either. But don't worry about it, Heero – I promise, everything will be okay."
He smiled slightly and nodded. Both assuming we had solved the problem, we kissed and laid down. But as I closed my eyes, I couldn't help but think about the confusion in his eyes. Never before had I seen him so unsure and confounded. That just didn't fit his personality. In the past, he had self-destructed, conquered the Zero system and faced off against hordes of mobile dolls without blinking an eye. Now he was going to come face to face with a little girl he may have to help take care of, and he seemed almost terrified. But the one thing I know about Heero is that in his mind, nothing is impossible, and nothing is insurmountable. I can take comfort in the fact that he will get through this. Then why am I so worried?
***
I watched nervously from the driver's seat as Duo brought the small girl out to the car. She smiled enthusiastically as Duo held her tightly in his arms. I couldn't help but think as I saw her that first time that she looked a lot like Duo; her smile, her heart shaped face, those beautiful eyes, and her chestnut colored hair. The resemblance was amazing; I suppose that makes sense, however.
Duo opened the backdoor of the car and sat her in the backseat. He looked over at me and smiled.
"That's Heero, Ayanna." He told her, pointing at me.
"Hi…Ayanna." I muttered softly.
She looked at me; her smile now faded, and said nothing.
"Say hello to Heero." He urged her.
"Hi." She mumbled.
I nodded and turned to look out the front windshield. Duo climbed in the front passenger seat and turned to me.
"Great, isn't she?" He asked in a whisper.
I nodded, trying to think of an appropriate answer. "Yeah Duo, she's…great." I replied half-heartily.
The trip to the circus was uneventful. I tried to concentrate on the road while Duo chatted incessantly to the small child. She answered him happily and eagerly.
I don't really understand the feelings I that were tugging on my heart at that moment. Something about Duo's voice just did made me feel indescribable. I decided to glance over at him; I just had to see the look that graced his face. But as I looked over I could see nothing but the side of him as he leaned over the seat, talking enthusiastically.
"Duo, sit down and hook in! The car is moving." I told him, getting slightly annoyed. Typically, I wouldn't give those actions a second thought, but for some reason, it made me even more nervous than I already was. From the corner of my eye, I could see him turn around and give me a funny look.
"What's the matter, Heero?" I could hear the bit of confusion in his voice.
Not knowing what to say, I didn't reply, and kept my eyes on the road ahead of me. The car became silent – too silent. I wondered if my voice had been too harsh.
All remained quiet until the tip of the circus tent appeared and Ayanna noticed it immediately.
"That's it! That's it, isn't it?" She yelled happily.
"Yeah!" Duo replied with the same eagerness. "Hurry up, Heero!" He said quickly.
Sighing, I turned into the parking area, which was now already brimming over with children and adults alike. After a while, I found a parking spot, and Duo bounded gleefully out of the car, pausing only to help Ayanna out. The two practically ran to the gate while I followed far behind. Once they reached the entranceway of the circus area, Duo turned and waited impatiently for me; all the while, the small girl tugged at his hand urging him to go on.
"C'mon Heero! Walk faster." he called out. I walked faster until I caught up with them. As we entered the gates, I felt anger build up inside me – I don't know why. I didn't like what was happening. I loved Duo, but that didn't make up for the feelings of regret seemed to overtake my body.
~~End of Chapter Three~~
***
Wow, I've finished chapter three. I promise chapter four will be up soon. Anyway, comments are appreciated! ~Star Kindler