Search For The Ocarina Of Time: Part 2, Chapter Seven
An Exchange With Death -An Exchange of Many Bad Words
(or Day 2, Akai at The Northern Mountain)
DISCLAIMER: A disclaimer I stole offa' somebody who stole it from somebody else:
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I no own,
So you no sue!
Gregg is ripped off shamelessly from Conker's Bad Fur Day *watches people run* Wait!! He's not a sick.... *sighs* Never mind....
I am so sorry this took so long! *does the Anju bow* I had a little family crisis, but everything's fine now.
On with the show!
**********DAWN OF THE SECOND DAY***********
------------------48 Hours Remain-----------------
*~*~*~*~MOUNTAIN SMITHY*~*~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI: *blink blink* Hey, Tael, we're not dead!
*dead silence*
AKAI: Ta....el? *looks around. Sees a sleeping, drooling, SKINNY GUY, and a hunched over, presumably sleeping, STRONG MAN. Continues staring around the tiny cabin until she hits pay-dirt* TAEL!!!
TAEL: *is frozen in a little block of ice*
AKAI: Uh-oh.... This is bad.... {What are my options? Let's see here...
#1 Wake those two freaks up. Naw, they'd just fight, or look for stinkin' _hot_ _spring_ _water_.
#2. Use the Fire Arrows! Oh shoot.... I'm out of MP.... Must've fired too many at the disturbing Goron geeze- erm, _Elder_....
#3. Well, I don't have any blue or green potions... Wait a second...!
#4. For some reeally stupid, though perhaps in this case, convienient, reason, bottles of green potions are under the snowballs! Just a matter of going outside and gettin' 'em!!} Yes, I know I'm a genius, baby!
*goes to open the door, but entire body is temporarily frozen due to touching the iced-over lock with her pinky*
Drat! Wait... I have an idea... A BRILLIANT idea.... A painful one, too. *pause* Well, here we go...
*takes deep breath* Fuuuuuuuuuu- CENSORED!!! THIS GETS REALLY BAD IT JUSTall you GOES ON AND ON AND ON. EVERY OBSENITY the IN EVERY LANGUAGE IMAGINABLE IS HERE. LET'S JUST yo' mamma SKIP THIS. PLEASE HOLD
***************************************************************************************************************************************************************************
AKAI: *pant pant* Eek, even _I_ feel guilty about THAT. Well, let's see what it- Uh-oh...
(the floor begins to tremble. Suddenly, a small volcano emerges from the floor. It spews molten lava everywhere, and AKAI sees TAEL defrost before she blacks out)
*~*~*~*~*~??? ??? ???~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI: Uhhn... What the- *is in a cold room made out of gray marble. Carvings of skulls and torches burning with blue flames are on the pillars* Oh jeez...
GRIM REAPER: *cannot be seen yet; Only shadow is visable looming toward AKAI* *in a deep booming voice* Yooooou are deeeaaaaad Akaiiiiiiiii...
AKAI: oO;
GRIM REAPER: *shadow getting closer* Yoooou are deeaaaaad Akai!! Yoooou areeee- *a "clang" followed by a "thud" is heard* *in higher-pitched voice* Aw, screw this thing! *megaphone comes bouncing toward AKAI, followed by a four-foot-tall Grim Reaper*
AKAI: Uhm...
GRIM REAPER: Hell with it, let's start over again. Ahem: My name is Gregg. I am, as you can tell, the Grim Reaper.
AKAI: Erm... Aren't you a bit... Short?
"GREGG": Well what the hell do you expect me to look like?!!! How many bloody Grim Reapers have you met?!
AKAI: Good point.
GREGG: Well obviously, Miss Akai-Bloody-Ku, you're dead. Now piss off. *begins to walk away into the inky blackness*
AKAI: o.o *snaps out of it* H-hey! Wait! What do I do now?! I need to find that ocarina!!
GREGG: *turns around and sighs, burrying his skull in a bony hand* Oh bloody hell... *returns to where AKAI is, sticks his scythe in the ground, snaps his skeletal fingers, causing a scroll to appear, and begins running one of his fingers up and down it* Akai Ku... Akai Ku... That's one of those bloody two-word names, like Billy-Bob, right? Tell me your surname!
AKAI: Uhm..ah... Oh yeah! Maxwell!
GREGG: Thank you, you little twit! *goes back to searching*
AKAI: *grumbles and begins kicking a rock around*
GREGG: Maxwell... Maxwell... *finds it* Oh bloody _hell_...
AKAI: *looks up with a bored expression on her face* What?
GREGG: Any relation, by chance, to that cursed _Duo_ Maxwell?
AKAI: *with curiosity* Yes...
GREGG: *swallowing* Close?
AKAI: *getting annoyed; starts tapping shoe* YESSS...
GREGG: By....blood?
AKAI: *sarcasticly* No, he's my husband. Of _course_ by blood!! He's my frikkin' BROTHER!!
GREGG: ...
AKAI: WHAT??!!!
GREGG: Oh _shit_....
AKAI: *gets the scheaming Duo look in her eyes* Whaaaat isss itttt?
GREGG: *sighs and snaps his fingers, causing his scroll to dissapear* Right, let me explain this sweetly and simply, so clearly that even you should be able to understand it, you little twit.
AKAI: *growls*
GREGG: Your....*said with a sneer* brother calls himself the bloody "God Of Death". Well the thing he doesn't know is, it's true. *taps floor tiles with his scythe*
AKAI: O.o I thought it was just a ludicrous battle-cry!
GREGG: *shrugging* Well, it's that too. In any event, it's true, and anyone related to a Maxwell is like those frikkin' cats. *mumbling* I HATE those things... No matter how many times you swing the scythe, they still live to...
AKAI: *cough cough* *ahem!*
GREGG: Oh shit, right....
AKAI: So HOW am I like a cat again?!
GREGG: Ahem: Anyone related to a Maxwell in any way can have as many bloody lives as they think they can get away with.
AKAI: As many...as I think...I can get....away with...?
GREGG: *annoyed* Is there a bloody echo in here?
AKAI: Well actually, it is kinda-
GREGG: Oh just shut the bloody hell up.
AKAI: Meanie...
*a long pause follows. Akai then slowly begins to grin*
AKAI: Soooooooooooo.... Going up?
GREGG: *nursing his head* Oh just _PISS_ _OFF_.... *waves his scythe, causing Akai to vanish*
*~*~*~*~MOUNTAIN SMITHY*~*~*~*~*~*~
TAEL: *tapping Akai's body* Akai! Akai! Please wake up! Pleeeeaaseeee....
AKAI: *eyes flutter open*
TAEL: *gasps* Akai! You're alive!
AKAI: *smirks* The Angel of Death has returned from Hell!
TAEL: *grumbling* Good, 'cause you owe me 1600 Rupees.
AKAI: *sweatdrop* C'mon, let's get the hell outa' *gets hit with a mallet labeled "CENSORS"* Itai.... No swearin' in the land of the living...
TAEL: ??
AKAI: *sigh* Never mind....
TAEL: Uhm, were we going to Snowhead?
AKAI: *sigh* Yes... *plays the Song of Soaring; disappears in a flash of wings*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~SNOWHEAD*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI/TAEL: *appear*
AKAI: For comedy's sake, I am going to PRETEND I do not know of that stupid tempest-breathing
biggoron...
LINK: *pops in with NAVI* I NEED that sword!! *pleads and grovels*
AKAI: *tries to shake Link off of her leg* I meant the GORON not the sword! Now zark off!!
LINK: "Zark"?
AKAI: We're not in the Underworld any more. Go kill the ghoulies yerself. *LINK and NAVI vanish*
TAEL: Now to move this Goron...
AKAI: YOU CAN'T SEE IT YET!! *whap!*
TAEL: OWWW!!! Sorry...
AKAI: Tael, I have an idea!
TAEL: What?
AKAI: *puts on Iron Boots and shoves TAEL in a bottle*
TAEL: Mphh!!
AKAI: *trudgs dramatically towards the gates of Snowhead Temple, blinded by the snow, her cloak blowing everywhere in the white winds*
WHITE WOLFOS 1 and 2: *pop out of the ground*
WHITE WOLFOS #1: Woo! Woore woo!! (Hey, deli-meat to go!)
WHITE WOLFOS #2: GRAA!! Snort!! WooOOOO!!! (Shut up, you moron: We never eat them anyway!!)
WHITE WOLFOS #1: whiiiiiiiine (We don't?)
WHITE WOLFOS #2: *snap!* GRAA!! Woo waaaroooo *snap* grrr! WOOOOWLOOOOOO!!! (No, moron! We attack people until they get to three hearts, then the beeping starts!!)
WHITE WOLFOS #1: whine (Huh?)
WHITE WOLFOS # 2: whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinee!! Whoo who Woore WOOWLWOOO!!! (Arrrr.... That alone is enough to kill them!)
WHITE WOLFOS #1: Yipyipyipyip- Grrr!! Whoo WOOORE grr *snap*!! (Hahahahaha- Hey! But we STILL don't eat them!)
WHITE WOLFOS #2: grrr *snap!* rrrrrerggg!! (Zark off!) *goes back under ground*
WHITE WOLFOS #1: ... (...) *goes back under ground*
AKAI: *shiver* I think... This is the entrance... *enters*
*~*~*~*~SNOWHEAD TEMPLE~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI: *collapses on the ground* Dang it's c-cold... *uncorks TAEL's bottle*
TAEL: *flies out* Ahh... Nice and toasty....
AKAI: Nani?
TAEL: *content sigh* Well, you were kind enough to put some lovely Blue Fire in there, which always burns warm, never hot, and never scolds the skin.
ANNOYING FEMALE SINGERS: Blue Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiire!
ANNOYING ANNOUNCER: Buy some at your local Hylian Potion Shop today!
TAEL/AKAI: ...
AKAI: Hn, that can't be too recent...
TAEL: Huh? Why not?
AKAI: Because there IS no Blue Fire in Termina! I must've picked it up in Hyrule a few months ago. Either that or that's one those bottles Link gave me and forgot to remove the contents. *sigh* Oh well. *stands on the glowing floor panel and disappears with TAEL*
*~*~*~*~*~GOHT'S DUNGEON~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI: *whispering* There's Goht, frozen in a block of ice...
TAEL: *gulp* Why don't we just leave him like that...?
AKAI: 'cause that'd be nooooo fun!!
TAEL: Heh... I can live without fun...
AKAI: *strings bow*
TAEL: NO AKAI DON'T-!
*TWANG!!!*
*****MASKED RUSTY GOATY-THING*******
===========GOHT================
GOHT: *charges at Akai and Tael*
TAEL: *dodges*
AKAI: *just stands there and goes flying*
AKAI: WHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA *OOMPH!!*
TAEL: AKAI!! *rushes over to her* Are you OK?!
AKAI: Do I LOOK OK? *gag*
TAEL: Why didn't you move?!
AKAI: Because I always moved automatically *Goht comes around the corner again, knocking Akai another twenty feet* IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN *whump!*
TAEL: *was so small he wasn't hit; rushes over to where Akai is*
AKAI: *gasping for air* ...the cinema scene.
TAEL: Akai, you're gonna' die if you don't move it!
AKAI: B-been there d-done that...
TAEL: *jumps in Akai's dimensional closet, hauls out the Feirce Deity's Mask and slaps it on her face*
AKAI: Uhg...Ugh....AIIIIIIIYAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! *SSHHHHEEEEEEEEEEN*
GOHT: *comes around the corner again*
TAEL: *cowering inside Omni Akai's cap* Wait for it... Wait for it...!
OMNI AKAI: I DON'T HAVE TIME TO WAIT FOR IT!! HERE HE COMES!!!
GOHT: *is about to connect to-*
************NIGHT OF THE SECOND DAY**************
============36 HOURS REMAIN==============
GOHT: *stops* WHAT THE-RARRRRAGGGGAG!!!!
OMNI AKAI: *slashes Goht to ribbons*
(Don-don-don. DOOOOOOOOOOONNN Dadadadada!!)
OMNI AKAI: Hey cool. Kick-ass. *axe labeled "CENSORS" comes flying toward her, but she neatly slices it in half* NO ONE messes with Omni-Akai *grins, then takes off mask and steps into crystal with TAEL*
*********MOUNTAIN VILLAGE********
AKAI/TAEL: *appear*
AKAI: Oooh, it's spri- OWWWWW!!!
BEE #21: *snickers*
AKAI: Spring!! The chirping OUCH frogs!
TAEL: Spr-OWIE-ing! Rains 'till you're water OWWWW!! Logged!!
AKAI: Let's just get outta' heeeeeeeeeeeeeeereeeeeee!! *runs off with TAEL*
***2***
********PATH TO GORON VILLAGE*********
AKAI: I am _so_ glad I have no allergies.... *takes out her Gerudo Membership Card and starts scraping her skin*
TAEL: What _are_ you doing?!
AKAI: *matter-of-factly* How else am I to get them out?
TAEL: Just use a pair...*slumps for a sec* A pair of tweezers!
AKAI: Baka! If you use tweezers, all of the poison inside the stinger will come surging into your veins! *scrapes out another sting* Do you know in my entire life, I've ever been stung by anything other than a mosquito? And even they don't like me!
TAEL: Uhnn...Tweezers are bad...eh? *hits the ground with a sickening thud*
AKAI: ...Tael, my question is not "Why?", as in "Why do you use tweezers when the health channels and parents are always screaming at you?" My question is "How?" in fact, as in, "HOW DOES A FAIRY USE TWEEZERS????????!!"
*breaks a snowball (once a snowboulder) and grabs the Green Potion from it. Mixes it with her Red Potion, and as you all know Green and Red make Blue, that's what she gets: A Blue Potion*
This should heal you in awhile. *shoves Tael in the bottle and skips along*
WOLFOS #1: *pops out of the ground* And where are you going little girl, all alone in the middle of the night in a place like this?
AKAI: *shrugs* I dunno where I'm going; I never prewrite!
WOLFOS #1: ...
AKAI: Well I DON'T! Not for this fic, anyway.
WOLFOS #1: ............you mean you're NOT going to Grandma's house?
AKAI: ....
WOLFOS #1: ...
AKAI: This is stupid.
WOLFOS #1: I agree.
AKAI: Tell you what: Why don't YOU tell ME where to go?
WOLFOS #1: Sure, I guess. You see that cave up there? *points with a paw*
AKAI: *flatly* No.
WOLFOS #1: Hm? Just a sec.... Stupid contacts... *pops red contacts out of his eyes, revealing that they are in fact sky-blue* Ah! There's a big huge boulder in front of that cave! Behing it is a Goron Racetrack. You'll have to blow up the boulder, though.
AKAI: Uhhhhhh.... I dunnoo....
(thinks of the last time she went to a Goron Race [1])
I'll pass.
WOLFOS #1: OK. *pops contacts back in*
AKAI: Thanks though! *tosses a biscuit to the wolfos* Hmm...where should I go...? I know! *takes out Fairy Ocarina and plays the Song Of Soaring; dissapears in a flash of wings*
*~*~*~*~*~*~MILK ROAD*~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI: *appears* Well, I'm sick of the Mountain. I'd better check the ranch-
**********DAWN OF THE FINAL DAY************
-------------------24 HOURS REMAIN--------------------
AKAI: Eesh... Well, I'd better check around the ranch today. Still, I wonder what Mikau's been up to...? *stares at plushie*
=======================================================
***2***: Once again, another secret to be devulged in the epilouge.
[1] I'm writing a SHORT fanfic explaining why Akai doesn't go to Goron Races.
Ack, this one is the first chapter that's SHORTER than the one before it!! AHHH!!! I'm really sorry it took so long, so I hope y'all like it. I'd like to thank my readers for being so patient with me:) Next Time: Mikau and Ruto at the Great Bay Temple.
Move out!
An Exchange With Death -An Exchange of Many Bad Words
(or Day 2, Akai at The Northern Mountain)
DISCLAIMER: A disclaimer I stole offa' somebody who stole it from somebody else:
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I no own,
So you no sue!
Gregg is ripped off shamelessly from Conker's Bad Fur Day *watches people run* Wait!! He's not a sick.... *sighs* Never mind....
I am so sorry this took so long! *does the Anju bow* I had a little family crisis, but everything's fine now.
On with the show!
**********DAWN OF THE SECOND DAY***********
------------------48 Hours Remain-----------------
*~*~*~*~MOUNTAIN SMITHY*~*~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI: *blink blink* Hey, Tael, we're not dead!
*dead silence*
AKAI: Ta....el? *looks around. Sees a sleeping, drooling, SKINNY GUY, and a hunched over, presumably sleeping, STRONG MAN. Continues staring around the tiny cabin until she hits pay-dirt* TAEL!!!
TAEL: *is frozen in a little block of ice*
AKAI: Uh-oh.... This is bad.... {What are my options? Let's see here...
#1 Wake those two freaks up. Naw, they'd just fight, or look for stinkin' _hot_ _spring_ _water_.
#2. Use the Fire Arrows! Oh shoot.... I'm out of MP.... Must've fired too many at the disturbing Goron geeze- erm, _Elder_....
#3. Well, I don't have any blue or green potions... Wait a second...!
#4. For some reeally stupid, though perhaps in this case, convienient, reason, bottles of green potions are under the snowballs! Just a matter of going outside and gettin' 'em!!} Yes, I know I'm a genius, baby!
*goes to open the door, but entire body is temporarily frozen due to touching the iced-over lock with her pinky*
Drat! Wait... I have an idea... A BRILLIANT idea.... A painful one, too. *pause* Well, here we go...
*takes deep breath* Fuuuuuuuuuu- CENSORED!!! THIS GETS REALLY BAD IT JUSTall you GOES ON AND ON AND ON. EVERY OBSENITY the IN EVERY LANGUAGE IMAGINABLE IS HERE. LET'S JUST yo' mamma SKIP THIS. PLEASE HOLD
***************************************************************************************************************************************************************************
AKAI: *pant pant* Eek, even _I_ feel guilty about THAT. Well, let's see what it- Uh-oh...
(the floor begins to tremble. Suddenly, a small volcano emerges from the floor. It spews molten lava everywhere, and AKAI sees TAEL defrost before she blacks out)
*~*~*~*~*~??? ??? ???~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI: Uhhn... What the- *is in a cold room made out of gray marble. Carvings of skulls and torches burning with blue flames are on the pillars* Oh jeez...
GRIM REAPER: *cannot be seen yet; Only shadow is visable looming toward AKAI* *in a deep booming voice* Yooooou are deeeaaaaad Akaiiiiiiiii...
AKAI: oO;
GRIM REAPER: *shadow getting closer* Yoooou are deeaaaaad Akai!! Yoooou areeee- *a "clang" followed by a "thud" is heard* *in higher-pitched voice* Aw, screw this thing! *megaphone comes bouncing toward AKAI, followed by a four-foot-tall Grim Reaper*
AKAI: Uhm...
GRIM REAPER: Hell with it, let's start over again. Ahem: My name is Gregg. I am, as you can tell, the Grim Reaper.
AKAI: Erm... Aren't you a bit... Short?
"GREGG": Well what the hell do you expect me to look like?!!! How many bloody Grim Reapers have you met?!
AKAI: Good point.
GREGG: Well obviously, Miss Akai-Bloody-Ku, you're dead. Now piss off. *begins to walk away into the inky blackness*
AKAI: o.o *snaps out of it* H-hey! Wait! What do I do now?! I need to find that ocarina!!
GREGG: *turns around and sighs, burrying his skull in a bony hand* Oh bloody hell... *returns to where AKAI is, sticks his scythe in the ground, snaps his skeletal fingers, causing a scroll to appear, and begins running one of his fingers up and down it* Akai Ku... Akai Ku... That's one of those bloody two-word names, like Billy-Bob, right? Tell me your surname!
AKAI: Uhm..ah... Oh yeah! Maxwell!
GREGG: Thank you, you little twit! *goes back to searching*
AKAI: *grumbles and begins kicking a rock around*
GREGG: Maxwell... Maxwell... *finds it* Oh bloody _hell_...
AKAI: *looks up with a bored expression on her face* What?
GREGG: Any relation, by chance, to that cursed _Duo_ Maxwell?
AKAI: *with curiosity* Yes...
GREGG: *swallowing* Close?
AKAI: *getting annoyed; starts tapping shoe* YESSS...
GREGG: By....blood?
AKAI: *sarcasticly* No, he's my husband. Of _course_ by blood!! He's my frikkin' BROTHER!!
GREGG: ...
AKAI: WHAT??!!!
GREGG: Oh _shit_....
AKAI: *gets the scheaming Duo look in her eyes* Whaaaat isss itttt?
GREGG: *sighs and snaps his fingers, causing his scroll to dissapear* Right, let me explain this sweetly and simply, so clearly that even you should be able to understand it, you little twit.
AKAI: *growls*
GREGG: Your....*said with a sneer* brother calls himself the bloody "God Of Death". Well the thing he doesn't know is, it's true. *taps floor tiles with his scythe*
AKAI: O.o I thought it was just a ludicrous battle-cry!
GREGG: *shrugging* Well, it's that too. In any event, it's true, and anyone related to a Maxwell is like those frikkin' cats. *mumbling* I HATE those things... No matter how many times you swing the scythe, they still live to...
AKAI: *cough cough* *ahem!*
GREGG: Oh shit, right....
AKAI: So HOW am I like a cat again?!
GREGG: Ahem: Anyone related to a Maxwell in any way can have as many bloody lives as they think they can get away with.
AKAI: As many...as I think...I can get....away with...?
GREGG: *annoyed* Is there a bloody echo in here?
AKAI: Well actually, it is kinda-
GREGG: Oh just shut the bloody hell up.
AKAI: Meanie...
*a long pause follows. Akai then slowly begins to grin*
AKAI: Soooooooooooo.... Going up?
GREGG: *nursing his head* Oh just _PISS_ _OFF_.... *waves his scythe, causing Akai to vanish*
*~*~*~*~MOUNTAIN SMITHY*~*~*~*~*~*~
TAEL: *tapping Akai's body* Akai! Akai! Please wake up! Pleeeeaaseeee....
AKAI: *eyes flutter open*
TAEL: *gasps* Akai! You're alive!
AKAI: *smirks* The Angel of Death has returned from Hell!
TAEL: *grumbling* Good, 'cause you owe me 1600 Rupees.
AKAI: *sweatdrop* C'mon, let's get the hell outa' *gets hit with a mallet labeled "CENSORS"* Itai.... No swearin' in the land of the living...
TAEL: ??
AKAI: *sigh* Never mind....
TAEL: Uhm, were we going to Snowhead?
AKAI: *sigh* Yes... *plays the Song of Soaring; disappears in a flash of wings*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~SNOWHEAD*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI/TAEL: *appear*
AKAI: For comedy's sake, I am going to PRETEND I do not know of that stupid tempest-breathing
biggoron...
LINK: *pops in with NAVI* I NEED that sword!! *pleads and grovels*
AKAI: *tries to shake Link off of her leg* I meant the GORON not the sword! Now zark off!!
LINK: "Zark"?
AKAI: We're not in the Underworld any more. Go kill the ghoulies yerself. *LINK and NAVI vanish*
TAEL: Now to move this Goron...
AKAI: YOU CAN'T SEE IT YET!! *whap!*
TAEL: OWWW!!! Sorry...
AKAI: Tael, I have an idea!
TAEL: What?
AKAI: *puts on Iron Boots and shoves TAEL in a bottle*
TAEL: Mphh!!
AKAI: *trudgs dramatically towards the gates of Snowhead Temple, blinded by the snow, her cloak blowing everywhere in the white winds*
WHITE WOLFOS 1 and 2: *pop out of the ground*
WHITE WOLFOS #1: Woo! Woore woo!! (Hey, deli-meat to go!)
WHITE WOLFOS #2: GRAA!! Snort!! WooOOOO!!! (Shut up, you moron: We never eat them anyway!!)
WHITE WOLFOS #1: whiiiiiiiine (We don't?)
WHITE WOLFOS #2: *snap!* GRAA!! Woo waaaroooo *snap* grrr! WOOOOWLOOOOOO!!! (No, moron! We attack people until they get to three hearts, then the beeping starts!!)
WHITE WOLFOS #1: whine (Huh?)
WHITE WOLFOS # 2: whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinee!! Whoo who Woore WOOWLWOOO!!! (Arrrr.... That alone is enough to kill them!)
WHITE WOLFOS #1: Yipyipyipyip- Grrr!! Whoo WOOORE grr *snap*!! (Hahahahaha- Hey! But we STILL don't eat them!)
WHITE WOLFOS #2: grrr *snap!* rrrrrerggg!! (Zark off!) *goes back under ground*
WHITE WOLFOS #1: ... (...) *goes back under ground*
AKAI: *shiver* I think... This is the entrance... *enters*
*~*~*~*~SNOWHEAD TEMPLE~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI: *collapses on the ground* Dang it's c-cold... *uncorks TAEL's bottle*
TAEL: *flies out* Ahh... Nice and toasty....
AKAI: Nani?
TAEL: *content sigh* Well, you were kind enough to put some lovely Blue Fire in there, which always burns warm, never hot, and never scolds the skin.
ANNOYING FEMALE SINGERS: Blue Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiire!
ANNOYING ANNOUNCER: Buy some at your local Hylian Potion Shop today!
TAEL/AKAI: ...
AKAI: Hn, that can't be too recent...
TAEL: Huh? Why not?
AKAI: Because there IS no Blue Fire in Termina! I must've picked it up in Hyrule a few months ago. Either that or that's one those bottles Link gave me and forgot to remove the contents. *sigh* Oh well. *stands on the glowing floor panel and disappears with TAEL*
*~*~*~*~*~GOHT'S DUNGEON~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI: *whispering* There's Goht, frozen in a block of ice...
TAEL: *gulp* Why don't we just leave him like that...?
AKAI: 'cause that'd be nooooo fun!!
TAEL: Heh... I can live without fun...
AKAI: *strings bow*
TAEL: NO AKAI DON'T-!
*TWANG!!!*
*****MASKED RUSTY GOATY-THING*******
===========GOHT================
GOHT: *charges at Akai and Tael*
TAEL: *dodges*
AKAI: *just stands there and goes flying*
AKAI: WHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA *OOMPH!!*
TAEL: AKAI!! *rushes over to her* Are you OK?!
AKAI: Do I LOOK OK? *gag*
TAEL: Why didn't you move?!
AKAI: Because I always moved automatically *Goht comes around the corner again, knocking Akai another twenty feet* IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN *whump!*
TAEL: *was so small he wasn't hit; rushes over to where Akai is*
AKAI: *gasping for air* ...the cinema scene.
TAEL: Akai, you're gonna' die if you don't move it!
AKAI: B-been there d-done that...
TAEL: *jumps in Akai's dimensional closet, hauls out the Feirce Deity's Mask and slaps it on her face*
AKAI: Uhg...Ugh....AIIIIIIIYAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! *SSHHHHEEEEEEEEEEN*
GOHT: *comes around the corner again*
TAEL: *cowering inside Omni Akai's cap* Wait for it... Wait for it...!
OMNI AKAI: I DON'T HAVE TIME TO WAIT FOR IT!! HERE HE COMES!!!
GOHT: *is about to connect to-*
************NIGHT OF THE SECOND DAY**************
============36 HOURS REMAIN==============
GOHT: *stops* WHAT THE-RARRRRAGGGGAG!!!!
OMNI AKAI: *slashes Goht to ribbons*
(Don-don-don. DOOOOOOOOOOONNN Dadadadada!!)
OMNI AKAI: Hey cool. Kick-ass. *axe labeled "CENSORS" comes flying toward her, but she neatly slices it in half* NO ONE messes with Omni-Akai *grins, then takes off mask and steps into crystal with TAEL*
*********MOUNTAIN VILLAGE********
AKAI/TAEL: *appear*
AKAI: Oooh, it's spri- OWWWWW!!!
BEE #21: *snickers*
AKAI: Spring!! The chirping OUCH frogs!
TAEL: Spr-OWIE-ing! Rains 'till you're water OWWWW!! Logged!!
AKAI: Let's just get outta' heeeeeeeeeeeeeeereeeeeee!! *runs off with TAEL*
***2***
********PATH TO GORON VILLAGE*********
AKAI: I am _so_ glad I have no allergies.... *takes out her Gerudo Membership Card and starts scraping her skin*
TAEL: What _are_ you doing?!
AKAI: *matter-of-factly* How else am I to get them out?
TAEL: Just use a pair...*slumps for a sec* A pair of tweezers!
AKAI: Baka! If you use tweezers, all of the poison inside the stinger will come surging into your veins! *scrapes out another sting* Do you know in my entire life, I've ever been stung by anything other than a mosquito? And even they don't like me!
TAEL: Uhnn...Tweezers are bad...eh? *hits the ground with a sickening thud*
AKAI: ...Tael, my question is not "Why?", as in "Why do you use tweezers when the health channels and parents are always screaming at you?" My question is "How?" in fact, as in, "HOW DOES A FAIRY USE TWEEZERS????????!!"
*breaks a snowball (once a snowboulder) and grabs the Green Potion from it. Mixes it with her Red Potion, and as you all know Green and Red make Blue, that's what she gets: A Blue Potion*
This should heal you in awhile. *shoves Tael in the bottle and skips along*
WOLFOS #1: *pops out of the ground* And where are you going little girl, all alone in the middle of the night in a place like this?
AKAI: *shrugs* I dunno where I'm going; I never prewrite!
WOLFOS #1: ...
AKAI: Well I DON'T! Not for this fic, anyway.
WOLFOS #1: ............you mean you're NOT going to Grandma's house?
AKAI: ....
WOLFOS #1: ...
AKAI: This is stupid.
WOLFOS #1: I agree.
AKAI: Tell you what: Why don't YOU tell ME where to go?
WOLFOS #1: Sure, I guess. You see that cave up there? *points with a paw*
AKAI: *flatly* No.
WOLFOS #1: Hm? Just a sec.... Stupid contacts... *pops red contacts out of his eyes, revealing that they are in fact sky-blue* Ah! There's a big huge boulder in front of that cave! Behing it is a Goron Racetrack. You'll have to blow up the boulder, though.
AKAI: Uhhhhhh.... I dunnoo....
(thinks of the last time she went to a Goron Race [1])
I'll pass.
WOLFOS #1: OK. *pops contacts back in*
AKAI: Thanks though! *tosses a biscuit to the wolfos* Hmm...where should I go...? I know! *takes out Fairy Ocarina and plays the Song Of Soaring; dissapears in a flash of wings*
*~*~*~*~*~*~MILK ROAD*~*~*~*~*~*
AKAI: *appears* Well, I'm sick of the Mountain. I'd better check the ranch-
**********DAWN OF THE FINAL DAY************
-------------------24 HOURS REMAIN--------------------
AKAI: Eesh... Well, I'd better check around the ranch today. Still, I wonder what Mikau's been up to...? *stares at plushie*
=======================================================
***2***: Once again, another secret to be devulged in the epilouge.
[1] I'm writing a SHORT fanfic explaining why Akai doesn't go to Goron Races.
Ack, this one is the first chapter that's SHORTER than the one before it!! AHHH!!! I'm really sorry it took so long, so I hope y'all like it. I'd like to thank my readers for being so patient with me:) Next Time: Mikau and Ruto at the Great Bay Temple.
Move out!