DISCLAIMER:
Yippee!! Another stolen disclaimer:
I own nothing. Except for you. Dance, my little slave, dance. (Made up by Cherry Blossom)
The Search For The Ocarina Of Time
Part Two, Chapter Eight: Mirror, Mirror, On The Wall: Who's The Fairest Zora Of Them All?
======DAWN OF THE SECOND DAY=====
**********48 Hours Remain*************
*~*~*~*~GREAT BAY COAST~*~*~*~*
Mikau: *sighs* So, like, now where do we go?
Ruto: To Great Bay Temple, bimbo!
Mikau: Like, do you even know how to get there?!
Ruto: ...
Mikau: *smirks* _I_ know how to get there. *jumps into the water and begins swimming at bullet-speed*
Ruto: H-hey! Wait up!! It's been ages since I've been able to swim like that!
XIIIRedXIII: *appears* *snickers* More like 36 hours....
Ruto: Can it!
Red: *shaking head in mock sorrow* Tsk, tsk. One of my own creations telling me to
'can it'...
Ruto: *ringing angrily* I am NOT one of YOUR creations! I, The Zoran Princess Ruto IV, was created by Shigeru Miyamoto and am owned by Nintendo!!
Red: In this ficcy you are, because I put you in the story, turned you into a fairy, made you Mikau's partner, and am controlling every move you make.
Ruto: What the heck do you mean?! YOU CAN'T CANRO- *eyes glaze over*
Red: *smirk*
Ruto: *bobbing around and singing* Happy feet!! I've got those happy feet!! You play that happy beat!! And I can't stop daaaaaaaaaaaaancing!!
Red: *chuckles*
Ruto: *still bobbing/dancing* Ba-da-da-ba-dum la-la-lala! Ba-da-da-ba-dum la-la-lala...
Meanwhile...
*~*~*~GREAT BAY TEMPLE~*~*~*
Mikau: *pops out of water* The great thing about being a Zora is that you can access the local temple without paying turtle-fare, eh Ruto?
...
Mikau: Ruto?
*suddenly, a vortex opens up in a corner, sucking in and spewing out various objects*
Mikau: *grabs onto a barrel so he doesn't get sucked into oblivion* AHHHHHH!!! A PLOTHOLE!!! *gets bonked on the head with the **** Dragon Ball*
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Impa's College Dictionary would like to supply you, the reader, with a dictionary definition of "plothole".
plothole (plot-hole) n. 1: A detail, event, or character in a literary work that is inconsistent or even interferes with the current plotline. (circa 1970s) 2: The physical manifestation of such a glitch, sucking in and/or spewing out various characters and materials that are inconsistent or interfering into a literary work. (circa 1997) SEE ALSO: VERTEX
Thank you.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Piccolo: (walks coolly and dramatically out of the plothole, cape flowing behind him, then walks up to Mikau) Here. (thrusts a small box into Mikau's hand, snatches the Dragon Ball, and walks back into the plothole, which closes up behind him)
Mikau: ... *opens up the box to reveal a very dazed Ruto* !!!
Ruto: *blinks a few times* Stupid authors think they own the universe....
Mikau: *opens mouth*
Ruto: DON'T say it!
Mikau: Sorry...
Ruto: My turn to ask: Now what?
Mikau: Let's fight the bossy-thing or whatever...
Ruto: Okaaaaay...
Mikau/Ruto: *jump into portal*
*~*~*~GYORG'S PIT~*~*~*~*
Mikau/Ruto: *fall* AAAAAAAAAAAA!!
*THUD!*
Ruto: *rubbing "head" with her wing* How can Link do that so nonchalantly?!
Mikau: More importantly, like, how can a fairy fall?
Ruto: ...
*creepy dripping noise echoes in empty room*
Mikau/Ruto: CLLLLLLLLIIIICCCCCCCHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
*dripping stops*
*quake starts*
Ruto: MORONS TWO: RETURN OF THE CLICHE!!!
Mikau: *sweatdrops* Uhm, I think you SHOULD be worried this time, Ruto...
Ruto: Wh-
======GARGANTUAN SUSHI TO-GO OF EVIL=======
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~GYORG~~~~~~~~~~~~
GYORG: *comes slamming down onto the platform, squashing Ruto*
Mikau: AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! *goes flying*
Red: *appears with popcorn* Yay! Blood and guts!!
GYORG: *sweatdrop* *summons up all of his power to flop back into the water so as to escape from Red*
Red: *sniffle* No one likes me...
Mikau: *head pops up* That was- *sees Gyorg coming* WHOA! *jumps onto the platform* Ruto, help! *sees Ruto* RUTO?!
Red: *smirk* I LOVE being evil...
*ruto's tiny fairy body lies squished and bloodied on the platform, no longer shining. It's the body of a human with wings, like a 3-D silouette*
Mikau: Red, that's gross.
Red: *shrugs as she gorges popcorn* I guess that's what you get from seeing "The Mummy Returns" on a sugar-high.
Mikau: Was it good?
Red: Excellent. Mikau, couldja' get on with your scene?
Mikau: Oh, ah, yeah. *sweatdrop* *picks up a script written in scribbles and crayon* Ruto... *stands up, holding the body in his hands* You may have been an annoying pain in the scales, but you were my friend! I WILL AVENGE YOU!!
Red: Uhm, Mikau...
Mikau: *still reading*QUIET!! I'm TRYING to be dramatic!!
Red: But, Mika-
Mikau: SHUT U- *is knocked over by Gyorg, and goes flying into the water*
Gyorg: *grabs Mikau in his jaws and shakes*
Red: *sighs*
Mikau: AAAARRRRG!! *manages to free himself from Gyorg's jaws, but is so horribly wounded that he sinks to the bottom of the pool with blood trailing*
Red: And I am NOT revealing what color Zoran blood is :P
Readers: *chuck Cukoo eggs at Red*
Gyorg: *closes in on the defenseless guitarist*
Mikau: *muffled by water* HIYAA!! *slashes at Gyorg*
Red: An "unexpected" come-back...
Mikau: Would you just SHUT UP!!?
Red: Ask me again in fifteen minutes.
Mikau: Grrr...
Gyorg: *howls/bleeds**blinks* *grins evily*
Mikau: Uh-oh....
Red: Yousa' in big doo-doo dis time!
Gyorg: *releases dozens of fish to attack Mikau*
Gyorg: *laughs creepily underwater somehow as the fish close in*
Mikau: *weakly* I love my life! I will die, and I will no longer have to face Red or Akai OR JAR-JAR BINKS!!
Red: *muches*
???: (from above water) EAT SHARDS, UGLY BUGGGER!!!
Gyorg: When'd we get to Englan-
*thousands of ice shards smash into Gyorg and his minions, ripping them to little pieces. A lighting flash blur jumps into the water and drags out Mikau*
Gyorg: I want my laaaaaaawyyerrr.... *dies*
Mikau: Damn... *flaming arrow labeled "CENSORS" comes flying at Mikau, but is extinguished by the water and bobs to the surface harmlessly*
Bum-Bum-Bum! Da-dddduuuuuum!! Dadadadadum!!
Mikau: Darn, I thought it might've killed me... *passes out*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
**********NIGHT OF THE SECOND DAY*******
~~~~~~~~~~36 Hours Remain~~~~~~~~~~
Female Zora: Heyloooo? Mister guitar!?
Aqua Fairy: *floats up* Uuuuuu....*blinks*Hey, you're Ruto!
Ruto: *sarcastically* No, it's Jabu-Jabu.
Aqua Fairy: Oh. Ok then. *floats to the ground*
Ruto: *rolls all four eyes* Iddjut!! Of COURSE it's me!!
Aqua Fairy: Oo; You look just like LuLu.
Ruto: Your saying your girlfriend looks like Jabu-Jabu?
Aqua Fairy: !!!! NOO!! SHE'D FILLET ME!! Speaking of which, you jumped into bloody water to save ME?
Ruto: ?? There was no blood. The censors made us take it away.
Aqua Fairy: Oh.... Freaks. *gets whapped with a "giant" frying pan*
Aqua Fairy: Eesh, like, FOUL PLAY!! Just 'cause they don't like me calling them freaks doesn't mean they hafta' through some frying pan at me!! And how did it get so huge?!
Ruto: *sweatdrop* Mikaaaauu.... It ISN'T huge....
*creepy music plays*
Aqua Fairy: Huh?
Ruto: *polishes frying pan so Mikau can see his reflection -guess*
Mikau (Aqua Fairy): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ruto: *sighs*
Mikau: WHY?! WHY?! WHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYY?!
Ruto: *shoves Mikau into a bottle* Listen!!
Mikau: *bangs about inside angrily* NOOOOOO!!1
Ruto: You were so terribly wounded it was the only way to save you!!
Mikau: *still banging* I DON'T CAAAAAAREEE!!
Ruto: *sweatdrop* Uhm, it was her idea? *points over to Red, who is asleep with an up-side-down popcorn bucket on her head*
Mikau: ...whatever.
Ruto: It WAAAAS...!!
Red (sleeptalking): Imhotep....Imhotep....RASHEEM OOLOO KASHKA!! *rolls over and splashes into water*
Mikau/Ruto: *sweatdrop*
Ruto: *lets Mikau out* Listen, it isn't permanent.
Mikau: Like, thank saphires! How long will it be?
Ruto: Eh, about... Noon tomorrow...
Mikau: Oo;;;;;
Ruto: You'll, ah, get used to it?
Mikau: Mommy...
Red: *pops out of water* MUMMY?! WHERE?! FAKOOSHKA THE MU- *a train labeled "CENSORS" hits Red*
Red: *is totally unharmed* Heh, you can't hurt ME! I'm the AUTHOR!! And besides, that was ancient Kemet, not what YOU thought. *poofs away*
Ruto: ...
Mikau: ...
Ruto: ...let's get moving.
Ruto/Mikau: *step on the warpy-thing*
*~*~*~*~GREAT BAY COAST~*~*~*~*
Ruto: *breathes* Ah, Great Bay Coast is beautiful at night, ain't it, Mikau?
Mikau: *whining* I want my body back...
Ruto: You can't yet. They're still working on it.
Mikau: ? Where?
Ruto: Uhm... The body shop?
*cymbal crash*
Mikau: That was...
********DAWN OF THE FINAL DAY*********
~~~~~~~~~~~24 HOURS REMAIN~~~~~~
Ruto: Wha?
Mikau: Lame.
Ruto: ;P
Mikau: Where's Link?! At least he's not a FAIRY!!
=============================
Blar, I wrote it once, thought it sucked, and re-did it. I was grounded for a week and couldn't write. Gomen!
Yippee!! Another stolen disclaimer:
I own nothing. Except for you. Dance, my little slave, dance. (Made up by Cherry Blossom)
The Search For The Ocarina Of Time
Part Two, Chapter Eight: Mirror, Mirror, On The Wall: Who's The Fairest Zora Of Them All?
======DAWN OF THE SECOND DAY=====
**********48 Hours Remain*************
*~*~*~*~GREAT BAY COAST~*~*~*~*
Mikau: *sighs* So, like, now where do we go?
Ruto: To Great Bay Temple, bimbo!
Mikau: Like, do you even know how to get there?!
Ruto: ...
Mikau: *smirks* _I_ know how to get there. *jumps into the water and begins swimming at bullet-speed*
Ruto: H-hey! Wait up!! It's been ages since I've been able to swim like that!
XIIIRedXIII: *appears* *snickers* More like 36 hours....
Ruto: Can it!
Red: *shaking head in mock sorrow* Tsk, tsk. One of my own creations telling me to
'can it'...
Ruto: *ringing angrily* I am NOT one of YOUR creations! I, The Zoran Princess Ruto IV, was created by Shigeru Miyamoto and am owned by Nintendo!!
Red: In this ficcy you are, because I put you in the story, turned you into a fairy, made you Mikau's partner, and am controlling every move you make.
Ruto: What the heck do you mean?! YOU CAN'T CANRO- *eyes glaze over*
Red: *smirk*
Ruto: *bobbing around and singing* Happy feet!! I've got those happy feet!! You play that happy beat!! And I can't stop daaaaaaaaaaaaancing!!
Red: *chuckles*
Ruto: *still bobbing/dancing* Ba-da-da-ba-dum la-la-lala! Ba-da-da-ba-dum la-la-lala...
Meanwhile...
*~*~*~GREAT BAY TEMPLE~*~*~*
Mikau: *pops out of water* The great thing about being a Zora is that you can access the local temple without paying turtle-fare, eh Ruto?
...
Mikau: Ruto?
*suddenly, a vortex opens up in a corner, sucking in and spewing out various objects*
Mikau: *grabs onto a barrel so he doesn't get sucked into oblivion* AHHHHHH!!! A PLOTHOLE!!! *gets bonked on the head with the **** Dragon Ball*
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Impa's College Dictionary would like to supply you, the reader, with a dictionary definition of "plothole".
plothole (plot-hole) n. 1: A detail, event, or character in a literary work that is inconsistent or even interferes with the current plotline. (circa 1970s) 2: The physical manifestation of such a glitch, sucking in and/or spewing out various characters and materials that are inconsistent or interfering into a literary work. (circa 1997) SEE ALSO: VERTEX
Thank you.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Piccolo: (walks coolly and dramatically out of the plothole, cape flowing behind him, then walks up to Mikau) Here. (thrusts a small box into Mikau's hand, snatches the Dragon Ball, and walks back into the plothole, which closes up behind him)
Mikau: ... *opens up the box to reveal a very dazed Ruto* !!!
Ruto: *blinks a few times* Stupid authors think they own the universe....
Mikau: *opens mouth*
Ruto: DON'T say it!
Mikau: Sorry...
Ruto: My turn to ask: Now what?
Mikau: Let's fight the bossy-thing or whatever...
Ruto: Okaaaaay...
Mikau/Ruto: *jump into portal*
*~*~*~GYORG'S PIT~*~*~*~*
Mikau/Ruto: *fall* AAAAAAAAAAAA!!
*THUD!*
Ruto: *rubbing "head" with her wing* How can Link do that so nonchalantly?!
Mikau: More importantly, like, how can a fairy fall?
Ruto: ...
*creepy dripping noise echoes in empty room*
Mikau/Ruto: CLLLLLLLLIIIICCCCCCCHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
*dripping stops*
*quake starts*
Ruto: MORONS TWO: RETURN OF THE CLICHE!!!
Mikau: *sweatdrops* Uhm, I think you SHOULD be worried this time, Ruto...
Ruto: Wh-
======GARGANTUAN SUSHI TO-GO OF EVIL=======
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~GYORG~~~~~~~~~~~~
GYORG: *comes slamming down onto the platform, squashing Ruto*
Mikau: AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! *goes flying*
Red: *appears with popcorn* Yay! Blood and guts!!
GYORG: *sweatdrop* *summons up all of his power to flop back into the water so as to escape from Red*
Red: *sniffle* No one likes me...
Mikau: *head pops up* That was- *sees Gyorg coming* WHOA! *jumps onto the platform* Ruto, help! *sees Ruto* RUTO?!
Red: *smirk* I LOVE being evil...
*ruto's tiny fairy body lies squished and bloodied on the platform, no longer shining. It's the body of a human with wings, like a 3-D silouette*
Mikau: Red, that's gross.
Red: *shrugs as she gorges popcorn* I guess that's what you get from seeing "The Mummy Returns" on a sugar-high.
Mikau: Was it good?
Red: Excellent. Mikau, couldja' get on with your scene?
Mikau: Oh, ah, yeah. *sweatdrop* *picks up a script written in scribbles and crayon* Ruto... *stands up, holding the body in his hands* You may have been an annoying pain in the scales, but you were my friend! I WILL AVENGE YOU!!
Red: Uhm, Mikau...
Mikau: *still reading*QUIET!! I'm TRYING to be dramatic!!
Red: But, Mika-
Mikau: SHUT U- *is knocked over by Gyorg, and goes flying into the water*
Gyorg: *grabs Mikau in his jaws and shakes*
Red: *sighs*
Mikau: AAAARRRRG!! *manages to free himself from Gyorg's jaws, but is so horribly wounded that he sinks to the bottom of the pool with blood trailing*
Red: And I am NOT revealing what color Zoran blood is :P
Readers: *chuck Cukoo eggs at Red*
Gyorg: *closes in on the defenseless guitarist*
Mikau: *muffled by water* HIYAA!! *slashes at Gyorg*
Red: An "unexpected" come-back...
Mikau: Would you just SHUT UP!!?
Red: Ask me again in fifteen minutes.
Mikau: Grrr...
Gyorg: *howls/bleeds**blinks* *grins evily*
Mikau: Uh-oh....
Red: Yousa' in big doo-doo dis time!
Gyorg: *releases dozens of fish to attack Mikau*
Gyorg: *laughs creepily underwater somehow as the fish close in*
Mikau: *weakly* I love my life! I will die, and I will no longer have to face Red or Akai OR JAR-JAR BINKS!!
Red: *muches*
???: (from above water) EAT SHARDS, UGLY BUGGGER!!!
Gyorg: When'd we get to Englan-
*thousands of ice shards smash into Gyorg and his minions, ripping them to little pieces. A lighting flash blur jumps into the water and drags out Mikau*
Gyorg: I want my laaaaaaawyyerrr.... *dies*
Mikau: Damn... *flaming arrow labeled "CENSORS" comes flying at Mikau, but is extinguished by the water and bobs to the surface harmlessly*
Bum-Bum-Bum! Da-dddduuuuuum!! Dadadadadum!!
Mikau: Darn, I thought it might've killed me... *passes out*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
**********NIGHT OF THE SECOND DAY*******
~~~~~~~~~~36 Hours Remain~~~~~~~~~~
Female Zora: Heyloooo? Mister guitar!?
Aqua Fairy: *floats up* Uuuuuu....*blinks*Hey, you're Ruto!
Ruto: *sarcastically* No, it's Jabu-Jabu.
Aqua Fairy: Oh. Ok then. *floats to the ground*
Ruto: *rolls all four eyes* Iddjut!! Of COURSE it's me!!
Aqua Fairy: Oo; You look just like LuLu.
Ruto: Your saying your girlfriend looks like Jabu-Jabu?
Aqua Fairy: !!!! NOO!! SHE'D FILLET ME!! Speaking of which, you jumped into bloody water to save ME?
Ruto: ?? There was no blood. The censors made us take it away.
Aqua Fairy: Oh.... Freaks. *gets whapped with a "giant" frying pan*
Aqua Fairy: Eesh, like, FOUL PLAY!! Just 'cause they don't like me calling them freaks doesn't mean they hafta' through some frying pan at me!! And how did it get so huge?!
Ruto: *sweatdrop* Mikaaaauu.... It ISN'T huge....
*creepy music plays*
Aqua Fairy: Huh?
Ruto: *polishes frying pan so Mikau can see his reflection -guess*
Mikau (Aqua Fairy): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ruto: *sighs*
Mikau: WHY?! WHY?! WHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYY?!
Ruto: *shoves Mikau into a bottle* Listen!!
Mikau: *bangs about inside angrily* NOOOOOO!!1
Ruto: You were so terribly wounded it was the only way to save you!!
Mikau: *still banging* I DON'T CAAAAAAREEE!!
Ruto: *sweatdrop* Uhm, it was her idea? *points over to Red, who is asleep with an up-side-down popcorn bucket on her head*
Mikau: ...whatever.
Ruto: It WAAAAS...!!
Red (sleeptalking): Imhotep....Imhotep....RASHEEM OOLOO KASHKA!! *rolls over and splashes into water*
Mikau/Ruto: *sweatdrop*
Ruto: *lets Mikau out* Listen, it isn't permanent.
Mikau: Like, thank saphires! How long will it be?
Ruto: Eh, about... Noon tomorrow...
Mikau: Oo;;;;;
Ruto: You'll, ah, get used to it?
Mikau: Mommy...
Red: *pops out of water* MUMMY?! WHERE?! FAKOOSHKA THE MU- *a train labeled "CENSORS" hits Red*
Red: *is totally unharmed* Heh, you can't hurt ME! I'm the AUTHOR!! And besides, that was ancient Kemet, not what YOU thought. *poofs away*
Ruto: ...
Mikau: ...
Ruto: ...let's get moving.
Ruto/Mikau: *step on the warpy-thing*
*~*~*~*~GREAT BAY COAST~*~*~*~*
Ruto: *breathes* Ah, Great Bay Coast is beautiful at night, ain't it, Mikau?
Mikau: *whining* I want my body back...
Ruto: You can't yet. They're still working on it.
Mikau: ? Where?
Ruto: Uhm... The body shop?
*cymbal crash*
Mikau: That was...
********DAWN OF THE FINAL DAY*********
~~~~~~~~~~~24 HOURS REMAIN~~~~~~
Ruto: Wha?
Mikau: Lame.
Ruto: ;P
Mikau: Where's Link?! At least he's not a FAIRY!!
=============================
Blar, I wrote it once, thought it sucked, and re-did it. I was grounded for a week and couldn't write. Gomen!