Sailor Senshi Deathmatch
Episode 6: The Outer Senshi vs. Buzz Lightyear, Woody, Hamm & Slink the Slinky Dog
By Fire Angel & Satan's Angel
Disclaimer: None of the characters in this deathmatch belong to us. So don't go trying to sue us
because… well, just don't. Yes. It's the same thing yet again. So don't even think about telling
us that we write the same thing every time… okay? Because writing a disclaimer is not something
that takes much talent, and we don't want to use up any of ours (heh heh, just joking!).
A Very Small Note from Fire Angel: Hello all, hope you get a kick out of this episode. As was
said last time, we haven't done Ronin Warriors because we know nothing about them. We are
considering a series two (due to the popularity of this set), and if we get enough requests for
various people that are to be killed, we'll do them in that (as we've already got this entire
series planned out). So, please e-mail us requests!
A Very Small Note from Satan's Angel: Hello everybody!! Yes, well… HI!!! I am proud to say that
Toy Story is cool and I like it lots and it's really funny and… well, you get my drift… But I
shall enjoy annihilating the little critters. As was said by F.Angel, who the hell are Ronin
Warriors and do you want another series? E-mail us your opinions at fizzy86@hotmail.com (ME!!!)
or rinoa_heartilly86@hotmail.com (HER!!!). Have fun and enjoy life!
Minako: *flirtatiously* Hi everyone, and welcome to the sixth episode of Sailor Senshi
Deathmatch, the show in which the warriors of love, justice and short skirts defeat anyone who
dares to go against them. I'm Aino Minako, but YOU can call me Mina-chan. I'm also known as the
gorgeous guardian of love, Sailor Venus, or the one, the only, Sailor V! I'm your commentator for
today, and our guest commentator is a dead ugly T-Rex toy, by the name of… err… Rex.
Rex: Am I on television? I'm on television!? Really!? REALLY!? HI EVERYONE!!!!! I'M ON TV!!!! HI,
HI, HI, HI…
Minako: *sweatdrop* I think we get it, Rex.
Rex: HI, HI… oh… OK. Hi, I'm Rex… I'm a dinosaur and I like playing Buzz Lightyear on Nintendo…
and I'm on TV… and uhh… HI.
Minako: Err… anyways, I'd like to introduce the defending side for the senshi… the outer senshi
of the outer planets… ahh… the senshi of the outer planets, I mean; Sailor Uranus, Sailor
Neptune, Sailor Saturn and Sailor Pluto!
Uranus: She is SUCH a blonde.
Neptune: *whispering* You're blonde too, Haruka.
Uranus: Oh. Yeah.
Saturn & Pluto: Konnichiwa, everyone. We are the Outer Senshi, the defenders of the Sailor
Senshi's champion title. Five wins in a row!
From the audience… Squall Leonhart (FF8): I bet they'd lose if they actually had to transform
while they were on stage. Anyone could kill em while they were transforming!
Minako: Shut it, cutie.
Rex: So I'm really on television? Yes? I'm glad I got that sorted… Oh, I'm on! And to challenge
the senshi, are everyone's favourite toys, ON TV FOR TONIGHT ONLY… Buzz Lightyear, Woody, Hamm
and Slink the Slinky dog!!!!!!!!!
Buzz: Buzz Lightyear to the rescue!!! Hi everyone I'm Bu…
Woody: Buzz!! Stop hogging the limelight!!
Buzz: Woody… It's not lime… it's white, and you would've noticed it if you had paid more
attention.
Woody: WHAT!? Well excuuuuuuse mmmme!
Buzz: What?! I'll… *Grabs Woody and wrestles him to the ground. They begin punching each other*
Slink: You two stop it! We're on live TV!
Hamm: TV?! I always wanted to be a star! *A spotlight hovers over him and everything else goes
black. Hamm appears from the darkness wearing a brown suit and a little bowler hat, and starts
reciting a scene from his favourite TV show*
Buzz & Woody: Ahh!!!! *Tackle Hamm from behind and the three of them start rolling around on the
ground*
Slink: *Shaking his head* Oh well… I'm Slink.
Minako: Anyway… let's get on with this, shall we?
!!DING!!
Saturn: Ohh… is that Slinky dog?! Oh, he's so cute! C'mere, you gorgeous little doggie you! Come
on, Slink! Come on, boy!
*Saturn starts chasing a frightened Slink around the arena*
Minako: And they're off! And around the first bend they go, Slink in the lead! Saturn is gaining
quickly though, as her behind seems to be going where she tells it to. Unfortunately for Slink,
he has to keep stopping and waiting for his hindquarters to catch up to him.
Rex: As his behind catches up to him, Saturn takes a dive and grabs his tail. She reels him in
and starts fussing over him.
Slink: Let me go! Let me go! This isn't funny! LEMME GO!!!!
Saturn: Ohh… you're so cute! Cute little doggie!
Minako: Slink looks like he's getting a little sick and tired of Hotaru's fussing. Be careful
Hotaru, or he'll bite you!
Saturn: He won't bite me, will you, Slinky Dog? You're such a cute little… oww!
Minako: Oops. Looks like he bit her. Fury in her eyes, and still holding onto his tail, Sailor
Saturn gets to her feet. She pulls her glaive out of nowhere and casts her 'Ribbon Revolution'
attack, a slightly less powerful version of 'Reborn Revolution'. Sharp, metal ribbons are cutting
into Slink, and he is falling into little pieces.
Rex: NOOOOOOO!!!!!! *sobbing* How could this happen? Why did she do that… WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
Minako: Geez, I'm glad I'm up here. Those ribbons look pretty sharp, and I don't want my poor,
poor face too… YAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
*One of Saturn's ribbons smashes through the glass of the commentator box and cuts Venus across
the face, leaving her with a scar reminiscent of Squall Leonhart's*
Minako: AAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!! I AM SOOOOO SICK OF THIS!!! MY POOR FACE! MY POOR, POOR
FACE!!!
Saturn: Oops! Sorry, Minako-sama!
Minako: THAT'S IT, I AM SOOOO OUT OF HERE!!!! *storms out, and a few seconds later Artemis walks
in to replace her*
Hamm: Ha! Look at that! She made quite a big fuss over a tiny scratch.
Squall: Hey, when I got a scratch like that I leapt up and gave the person I was fighting a
mirror imaged one!
Hamm: Oh… really… I'll just go and stand over here now… *tries to sneak unsuspiciously off to the
side of the ring*
Artemis: Hey, guys! That… PIG TOY is getting away! DON'T LET HIM GET AWAY! HE MADE FUN OF POOR
MINAKO'S SCRATCH!!!!
Uranus: Don't worry, Artemis. I'll take this one out!
Artemis: Hamm squeals in horror as, with one single move, Uranus unsheathes her Space Sword and
runs it through his middle! WOOOHOOOO!! The PIG is DEAD!
Rex: NOOOOOOO!!!!!! *sobbing* How could this happen? Why did she do that… WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
Artemis: Is that your favourite saying or something?
Rex: What?! I wasn't paying attention… I was watching the Deathmatch on TV…
Artemis: You're an IDIOT! THIS IS THE DEATHMATCH! WHY THE HELL ARE YOU WATCHING IT ON
TELEVISION?!
Rex: Then… you mean… HAMM AND SLINK REALLY DIED!?!?!? NOOOOOOO!!!!!! *sobbing* How could this
happen? Why did she do that… WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
Artemis: *sweatdrop* Anyways… meanwhile, Sailor Pluto is trying to grab Woody. Due to his… err…
shortness… he seems to be more agile, and is easily getting away. Finally, in a move of
desperation… YEAH! GO PLUTO! She just grabbed him by the drawstring, and she's holding him up
like a hung man! WOOHOO!
Woody: Reach for the sky! Somebody's poisoned the waterhole! There's a snake in my boot! Reach
for the… help me!!!!
Artemis: Now that she's actually got him, Pluto-san's job is much easier. In a single move, she
wraps the drawstring around Woody's throat, therefore strangling him. WOOOHOOOOOOO!!!! GO FOR IT,
SAILOR PLUTO!!! KILLLLLLL HIIMMMMM!!!!!
Rex: NOOOOOOO!!!!!! *sobbing* How could this happen? Why did she do that… WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
WOOOOOOOOODYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!! How could this happen? Why did she do that…
WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
Artemis: Oh, shut up, you useless, good-for-nothing piece of plastic! There's only one of your
friends left! Why don't you just surrender so poor ol' Buzz won't die, like the rest of your
loser plastic friends?
Rex: Well… I guess it would be best, so I guess….
Buzz: NO!!! I will fight til the end! I'll use my laser against you!! *presses little button on
his arm and a little red dot of light appears on Sailor Neptune's fuku*
Neptune: Ohh, ahh… I'm sooooo scared…
Buzz: See? I told you? I have everyone shaking in their boots… because I am BUZZ LIGHTYEAR!!!!
Neptune: *looking at her shoes with a sweatdrop* Firstly, they're pumps, not boots, and secondly,
you are getting on my nerves.
Artemis: Looks like this battle's over, everyone! Sailor Neptune moves forward to Buzz and pulls
out her Aquamarine Mirror… oh, damn! He just flew off! Hey wait a minute! He's not supposed to
fly!
Rex: That was in the movie! GO BUZZ!
Neptune: NOW I'M REALLY MAD!!!!!!! TIME TO DIE, BUZZ LIGHTYEAR!
Uranus: Michiru, remember what happened last time when you…?
Neptune: SHUT UP HARUKA! THE TOY HAS TO DIE!
Uranus: Calm down. *starts to put a comforting arm around Sailor Neptune* Just calm down, Michi…
Neptune: *grabbing Uranus' sword and holding it to the latter's throat* DON'T TOUCH ME!!!!!
Uranus: Okie dokie. You just go ahead and kill him then. I am going to go find an umbrella… and a
dinghy. Be right back.
Michiru: All right then, here goes nothing! DEEEEEEEEEEEP SUBMERRRRRRRRRRRRGE!
Artemis: I'm so glad we're not down there. The whole place has been flooded with water! That
Squall dude is floating around, thrashing wildly… but the main thing is… BUZZ LIGHTYEAR IS DEAD,
DUDE! THAT MEANS THAT THE SENSHI WIN!
Rex: NOOOOOOO!!!!!! *sobbing* How could this happen? Why did she do that… WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
Squall: HEEEELLLLLPPPPP ME, I CAN'T FRICKING SWIM!!!!!!
Uranus: *holding a sopping umbrella above her as she floats out of the arena in a rubber dinghy*
Geez. That was worse than last time.
Artemis: Well, I'm proud to say that the senshi have once again annihilated all opposition that
stand in their way. Next week… no… next fortnight, as we'll have to rebuild the arena now… the
senshi will go against yet another tough opposition! See you next time. Ja mata!
Episode 6: The Outer Senshi vs. Buzz Lightyear, Woody, Hamm & Slink the Slinky Dog
By Fire Angel & Satan's Angel
Disclaimer: None of the characters in this deathmatch belong to us. So don't go trying to sue us
because… well, just don't. Yes. It's the same thing yet again. So don't even think about telling
us that we write the same thing every time… okay? Because writing a disclaimer is not something
that takes much talent, and we don't want to use up any of ours (heh heh, just joking!).
A Very Small Note from Fire Angel: Hello all, hope you get a kick out of this episode. As was
said last time, we haven't done Ronin Warriors because we know nothing about them. We are
considering a series two (due to the popularity of this set), and if we get enough requests for
various people that are to be killed, we'll do them in that (as we've already got this entire
series planned out). So, please e-mail us requests!
A Very Small Note from Satan's Angel: Hello everybody!! Yes, well… HI!!! I am proud to say that
Toy Story is cool and I like it lots and it's really funny and… well, you get my drift… But I
shall enjoy annihilating the little critters. As was said by F.Angel, who the hell are Ronin
Warriors and do you want another series? E-mail us your opinions at fizzy86@hotmail.com (ME!!!)
or rinoa_heartilly86@hotmail.com (HER!!!). Have fun and enjoy life!
Minako: *flirtatiously* Hi everyone, and welcome to the sixth episode of Sailor Senshi
Deathmatch, the show in which the warriors of love, justice and short skirts defeat anyone who
dares to go against them. I'm Aino Minako, but YOU can call me Mina-chan. I'm also known as the
gorgeous guardian of love, Sailor Venus, or the one, the only, Sailor V! I'm your commentator for
today, and our guest commentator is a dead ugly T-Rex toy, by the name of… err… Rex.
Rex: Am I on television? I'm on television!? Really!? REALLY!? HI EVERYONE!!!!! I'M ON TV!!!! HI,
HI, HI, HI…
Minako: *sweatdrop* I think we get it, Rex.
Rex: HI, HI… oh… OK. Hi, I'm Rex… I'm a dinosaur and I like playing Buzz Lightyear on Nintendo…
and I'm on TV… and uhh… HI.
Minako: Err… anyways, I'd like to introduce the defending side for the senshi… the outer senshi
of the outer planets… ahh… the senshi of the outer planets, I mean; Sailor Uranus, Sailor
Neptune, Sailor Saturn and Sailor Pluto!
Uranus: She is SUCH a blonde.
Neptune: *whispering* You're blonde too, Haruka.
Uranus: Oh. Yeah.
Saturn & Pluto: Konnichiwa, everyone. We are the Outer Senshi, the defenders of the Sailor
Senshi's champion title. Five wins in a row!
From the audience… Squall Leonhart (FF8): I bet they'd lose if they actually had to transform
while they were on stage. Anyone could kill em while they were transforming!
Minako: Shut it, cutie.
Rex: So I'm really on television? Yes? I'm glad I got that sorted… Oh, I'm on! And to challenge
the senshi, are everyone's favourite toys, ON TV FOR TONIGHT ONLY… Buzz Lightyear, Woody, Hamm
and Slink the Slinky dog!!!!!!!!!
Buzz: Buzz Lightyear to the rescue!!! Hi everyone I'm Bu…
Woody: Buzz!! Stop hogging the limelight!!
Buzz: Woody… It's not lime… it's white, and you would've noticed it if you had paid more
attention.
Woody: WHAT!? Well excuuuuuuse mmmme!
Buzz: What?! I'll… *Grabs Woody and wrestles him to the ground. They begin punching each other*
Slink: You two stop it! We're on live TV!
Hamm: TV?! I always wanted to be a star! *A spotlight hovers over him and everything else goes
black. Hamm appears from the darkness wearing a brown suit and a little bowler hat, and starts
reciting a scene from his favourite TV show*
Buzz & Woody: Ahh!!!! *Tackle Hamm from behind and the three of them start rolling around on the
ground*
Slink: *Shaking his head* Oh well… I'm Slink.
Minako: Anyway… let's get on with this, shall we?
!!DING!!
Saturn: Ohh… is that Slinky dog?! Oh, he's so cute! C'mere, you gorgeous little doggie you! Come
on, Slink! Come on, boy!
*Saturn starts chasing a frightened Slink around the arena*
Minako: And they're off! And around the first bend they go, Slink in the lead! Saturn is gaining
quickly though, as her behind seems to be going where she tells it to. Unfortunately for Slink,
he has to keep stopping and waiting for his hindquarters to catch up to him.
Rex: As his behind catches up to him, Saturn takes a dive and grabs his tail. She reels him in
and starts fussing over him.
Slink: Let me go! Let me go! This isn't funny! LEMME GO!!!!
Saturn: Ohh… you're so cute! Cute little doggie!
Minako: Slink looks like he's getting a little sick and tired of Hotaru's fussing. Be careful
Hotaru, or he'll bite you!
Saturn: He won't bite me, will you, Slinky Dog? You're such a cute little… oww!
Minako: Oops. Looks like he bit her. Fury in her eyes, and still holding onto his tail, Sailor
Saturn gets to her feet. She pulls her glaive out of nowhere and casts her 'Ribbon Revolution'
attack, a slightly less powerful version of 'Reborn Revolution'. Sharp, metal ribbons are cutting
into Slink, and he is falling into little pieces.
Rex: NOOOOOOO!!!!!! *sobbing* How could this happen? Why did she do that… WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
Minako: Geez, I'm glad I'm up here. Those ribbons look pretty sharp, and I don't want my poor,
poor face too… YAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
*One of Saturn's ribbons smashes through the glass of the commentator box and cuts Venus across
the face, leaving her with a scar reminiscent of Squall Leonhart's*
Minako: AAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!! I AM SOOOOO SICK OF THIS!!! MY POOR FACE! MY POOR, POOR
FACE!!!
Saturn: Oops! Sorry, Minako-sama!
Minako: THAT'S IT, I AM SOOOO OUT OF HERE!!!! *storms out, and a few seconds later Artemis walks
in to replace her*
Hamm: Ha! Look at that! She made quite a big fuss over a tiny scratch.
Squall: Hey, when I got a scratch like that I leapt up and gave the person I was fighting a
mirror imaged one!
Hamm: Oh… really… I'll just go and stand over here now… *tries to sneak unsuspiciously off to the
side of the ring*
Artemis: Hey, guys! That… PIG TOY is getting away! DON'T LET HIM GET AWAY! HE MADE FUN OF POOR
MINAKO'S SCRATCH!!!!
Uranus: Don't worry, Artemis. I'll take this one out!
Artemis: Hamm squeals in horror as, with one single move, Uranus unsheathes her Space Sword and
runs it through his middle! WOOOHOOOO!! The PIG is DEAD!
Rex: NOOOOOOO!!!!!! *sobbing* How could this happen? Why did she do that… WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
Artemis: Is that your favourite saying or something?
Rex: What?! I wasn't paying attention… I was watching the Deathmatch on TV…
Artemis: You're an IDIOT! THIS IS THE DEATHMATCH! WHY THE HELL ARE YOU WATCHING IT ON
TELEVISION?!
Rex: Then… you mean… HAMM AND SLINK REALLY DIED!?!?!? NOOOOOOO!!!!!! *sobbing* How could this
happen? Why did she do that… WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
Artemis: *sweatdrop* Anyways… meanwhile, Sailor Pluto is trying to grab Woody. Due to his… err…
shortness… he seems to be more agile, and is easily getting away. Finally, in a move of
desperation… YEAH! GO PLUTO! She just grabbed him by the drawstring, and she's holding him up
like a hung man! WOOHOO!
Woody: Reach for the sky! Somebody's poisoned the waterhole! There's a snake in my boot! Reach
for the… help me!!!!
Artemis: Now that she's actually got him, Pluto-san's job is much easier. In a single move, she
wraps the drawstring around Woody's throat, therefore strangling him. WOOOHOOOOOOO!!!! GO FOR IT,
SAILOR PLUTO!!! KILLLLLLL HIIMMMMM!!!!!
Rex: NOOOOOOO!!!!!! *sobbing* How could this happen? Why did she do that… WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
WOOOOOOOOODYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!! How could this happen? Why did she do that…
WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
Artemis: Oh, shut up, you useless, good-for-nothing piece of plastic! There's only one of your
friends left! Why don't you just surrender so poor ol' Buzz won't die, like the rest of your
loser plastic friends?
Rex: Well… I guess it would be best, so I guess….
Buzz: NO!!! I will fight til the end! I'll use my laser against you!! *presses little button on
his arm and a little red dot of light appears on Sailor Neptune's fuku*
Neptune: Ohh, ahh… I'm sooooo scared…
Buzz: See? I told you? I have everyone shaking in their boots… because I am BUZZ LIGHTYEAR!!!!
Neptune: *looking at her shoes with a sweatdrop* Firstly, they're pumps, not boots, and secondly,
you are getting on my nerves.
Artemis: Looks like this battle's over, everyone! Sailor Neptune moves forward to Buzz and pulls
out her Aquamarine Mirror… oh, damn! He just flew off! Hey wait a minute! He's not supposed to
fly!
Rex: That was in the movie! GO BUZZ!
Neptune: NOW I'M REALLY MAD!!!!!!! TIME TO DIE, BUZZ LIGHTYEAR!
Uranus: Michiru, remember what happened last time when you…?
Neptune: SHUT UP HARUKA! THE TOY HAS TO DIE!
Uranus: Calm down. *starts to put a comforting arm around Sailor Neptune* Just calm down, Michi…
Neptune: *grabbing Uranus' sword and holding it to the latter's throat* DON'T TOUCH ME!!!!!
Uranus: Okie dokie. You just go ahead and kill him then. I am going to go find an umbrella… and a
dinghy. Be right back.
Michiru: All right then, here goes nothing! DEEEEEEEEEEEP SUBMERRRRRRRRRRRRGE!
Artemis: I'm so glad we're not down there. The whole place has been flooded with water! That
Squall dude is floating around, thrashing wildly… but the main thing is… BUZZ LIGHTYEAR IS DEAD,
DUDE! THAT MEANS THAT THE SENSHI WIN!
Rex: NOOOOOOO!!!!!! *sobbing* How could this happen? Why did she do that… WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?
Squall: HEEEELLLLLPPPPP ME, I CAN'T FRICKING SWIM!!!!!!
Uranus: *holding a sopping umbrella above her as she floats out of the arena in a rubber dinghy*
Geez. That was worse than last time.
Artemis: Well, I'm proud to say that the senshi have once again annihilated all opposition that
stand in their way. Next week… no… next fortnight, as we'll have to rebuild the arena now… the
senshi will go against yet another tough opposition! See you next time. Ja mata!