17 years and 58 seconds
Chapter 5
When I look back on the time I spent with Mystique and the Brotherhood, it wasn't all bad. Truly, she did understand my angst and isolation. And truly, she did help me find my place, though I would never have ever guessed how and how much it would cost.
With Magneto still incarcerated, Mystique was the head of the Brotherhood again. She had assumed Senator Kelly's position and slowly extracted him from public life. The real Senator Kelly was dead, of course, but she could always pull him out of 'retirement' if she needed his influence somewhere. Like Magneto, Mystique and the Brotherhood believed that the way to power was through humans, not with them. The Brotherhood did not have the respect for humans that the Professor has. The more time I spent with them, the more I understood the differences between these two sets of mutants.
The mutants who find their way to the Brotherhood all have the same thing in common - startling and sometimes grotesque physical mutations that make them obvious targets of discrimination. They all had felt the harsh rejection of humans and returned that rejection with an outlash of their powers.
The Professor's mutants could pretty much all pass for normal. They had powers that didn't draw attention or cause people to stare. Even Scott's visor was passable to the average person. Maybe even a little cool.
And even though I could also pass for normal, I fit more with the Brotherhood than I cared to admit. I had a rage growing inside me that was threatening to take over. I didn't see it at the time, but Mystique was feeding that rage. She believed that once I fully accepted my rage then I'd be a permanent member of their side. She helped me through my depression and taught me how to be thankful for what I did have. But she did these things with an ulterior motive.
She asked me what I most wanted out of life. I told her in generalities but she eventually got me to mention a specific. Logan. I was afraid to bring this up with her because everyone knew of their fight at the Statue of Liberty. Logan had stabbed her and left her for dead. But she showed no signs of being upset.
"Wolverine, eh? I can't say I blame you. He's very good looking... and a good fighter."
"He sees me as a child"
"Well aren't you?"
My glared at her in defiance.
"I am NOT. I'm a woman."
Mystique just shook her head and chuckled to herself.
"You might have the body of a woman, but you're still a scared little girl, looking for a man to protect you." She looked me up and down. "Protect YOURSELF. Don't rely on anyone to come rescue you. Save yourself."
Words I live by, even today.
During my time with the Brotherhood I became proficient at the more frowned upon arts. I became a marksman with handguns, I learned to pick locks with ease and I mastered using and misdirecting humans. Guards, particularly.
Mystique told me that like other organizations, they too need to recruit people. She asked me to evaluate a new member who had joined. I first saw her in the drawing room, talking to Mystique. She was a little taller than me, and a little older, maybe 23 or 25. She was beautiful too. She had black hair, and a curvacious womanly body. But like Mystique, she was marked by her skin. She had greenish tinted skin that matched her eyes. She was dressed in a form-fitting pair of jeans, a black leather jacket and a white t-shirt. I couldn't take my eyes off of her for some reason. She was so oddly beautiful but completely comfortable with her attractiveness. When she walked, she swayed her hips and smiled at the men, a devilish glint in her eyes.
A femme fatale in living flesh.
Later that evening, we all sat down and had dinner together. She ignored me and talked to Mystique and the others. She told them of her powers and how they could benefit their cause. She had the power of flight, near imperviousness and super human strength. As a demonstration, she picked up a fire place poker and twisted it into a pretzel. Mystique nodded her approval. Mystique questioned me later that evening.
"So what do you think of her?"
"She's definitely powerful, that's for sure. What's her name?"
"She calls herself Siren." I was about to say 'What kind of name is Siren' but I held my tongue. Afterall, what kind of name is Rogue?
"Where's she been until now?"
"Europe. Alaska. Canada. She, uh, claims to know Wolverine."
My head snapped up so fast I nearly hurt myself but I tried to act non-chalant.
"Oh? How does she know him?"
"To quote her, 'intimately'."
Jealousy. It's an ugly feeling. And I was feeling it all over. Logan had been with her?
"Does she know where Wolverine is now?"
Mystique shook her head. "She was last with him about 4 months ago."
I tried to hide my disappointment. The one thing I hadn't mastered yet was a poker face. My emotions were still broadcast across my face.
"Don't worry, Rogue, you'll find him again. And you'll blow him away. He won't know what to think."
"I hope you're right."
Siren hung around the castle for a few days and my reaction to her was growing stronger all the time. I'd thought my feelings about Jean were strong, but here was a woman who'd slept with Logan after he left me at the mansion. Bastard! BASTARD! Siren made it worse by talking about those exploits in front of me. She talked about how animalistic he was, how powerful he'd been. It amused her to see me upset. I tried to avoid her, but we were forced together all the time.
Then came my eighteenth birthday. Mystique said she had a special gift for me but I'd have to wait until after the day's workout. The workout was when members sparred with each other in an effort to keep sharp. Today, I was paired with Siren. Oh joy.
The workout area was outside in the fresh air and sun. I welcomed this, even if I didn't want to fight Siren. I didn't know if she knew of my 'power' so I decided to wait and see how she attacked. To my surprise, Siren apparently had no love for me, either. She started off the match by punching me in the head and knocking me down. I got up and brushed the dirt from my butt and tried to ignore the throbbing pain. Siren taunted me, daring me to attack, to show her something. As I moved toward her, she grabbed my arm and flipped me over onto my back, knocking the wind from my lungs. I lay gasping for air as the sound of her mocking laughter filled my ears.
"My god, is THIS the quality of mutants the Brotherhood's attracting these days? What's your power, little girl, the ability to act like a punching bag?" She kicked my ribs and spat on the ground next to my head.
It's hard for me to describe how full of wrath I was at that moment. I was seething with rage as I staggered to my feet. Think, idiot. Think. I clutched my side where she kicked me and put one hand out in front of me.
"Wait, you win. I give up."
Siren laughed and danced around like Rocky. I tried to stand up straight and casually took off my gloves in a show of giving up the fight. I extended my hand and in her excitement of winning, she didn't notice or care that my glove was off. As her hand touched mine, she immediately knew something was wrong.
Siren immediately tried to pull her hand away, but the process had already begun. I could easily control her hand in mine and not allow her to remove it. The smug smile that had lived on her face disappeared from her and appeared on mine. She fell to her knees and begged for mercy but my mind was blurred by anger, revenge. The seconds ticked by and as they did, more of her power flowed into me. But when Siren's eyes rolled back in her head I suddenly snapped out of what I was doing. I don't want to KILL her! I shook my head as though to clear some kind of cobwebs and let go of her hand.
But to my surprise, Mystique appeared out of no where and clamped my hand back onto Siren's with her own gloved hand. I'd held onto Logan a total of 58 seconds, the longest was only 39 seconds. I was well over a minute and half with Siren. Mystique was smiling as Siren struggled against the pain. She eventually made a gurgling sound and collapsed, a dead weight pulling on my hand. Only then did Mystique allow me to remove my hand from Siren's. I staggered backwards, confused, upset, in shock.
"Oh my God, what did I do? Is she dead?" I whispered. My eyes were wide with fright, fear that I'd taken a life.
Mystique touched Siren's throat and then opened her eyelids, one at a time.
"She's not dead. She's probably in a coma." My hand flew to my mouth to cover the gasp. No, what did I do?
"Will she be alright?" I watched as two Brothers carried Siren's body inside.
"I don't know, but we'll watch her. I'm more concerned about you. How do YOU feel?"
"What do you mean? Upset, of course! I didn't mean to - "
"Not that! I meant, can you feel her powers in you? Her strength, her ability to fly."
I didn't want to admit it before, but yes, I could. Physically, I felt fantastic.
"Yes, I can feel them."
"Try them. Go on." Mystique urged me on, eager to see what I could do.
I pushed off with my toes and suddenly I was flying through the air. Tears of joy blurred my vision as I danced in the air. Nothing compares with the joy of flying, soaring through the air like a bird. Storm had been the only other person I knew who could fly and she'd never told me how beautiful it was. I was having so much fun with my new 'toy' I barely heard Mystique on the ground calling me. I made a clumsy two footed landed but my face was beaming with happiness. Mystique was holding a six foot long piece of pipe in her hands.
"Are you ready to see about the other powers? Her imperviousness?" I nodded hesitantly and braced myself as I saw the pipe being swung around to hit me. I felt the contact, but no pain. I opened my eyes to find Mystique laughing. The pipe had bent around my body. Rather than knocking me down, the pipe had bent. I started laughing too. She handed the bent pipe to me and nodded. Siren's strength. With seemingly no effort, I bent the pipe back straight and then into a knot.
"This is incredible! I feel fantastic! How long do you think it will last?" I danced around the grounds, my feet barely touching the ground. Mystique waited until I came back to her to answer. I was giddy and flushed with happiness.
"Last? My dear Rogue, 'this' will last until you die. It's permanent. THIS is your gift. Happy Birthday."
My heart sank like a rock. As high as I had been feeling, that's how low I suddenly felt. No, it couldn't be true. Siren wouldn't recover her abilities? I'd stolen them? Stolen. I was a thief. A villain. I was the bad guy. I shook my head in disbelief and denial. No. No, Siren will get better. She has to. I can't live with that kind of guilt.
Mystique must have noticed my devastation because the next thing I felt was her gloved hand slapping me across the face. I glared at her and saw she was furious at me.
"What's WRONG with you?! I gave you a wonderful gift. You're now one of the most powerful mutants out there! Everyone will fear you! And this is how you react? This is how you repay me? Have a backbone, woman. I've given you the tools to do anything. ANYTHING!"
"At what price? I've destroyed someone. Siren's gone. She'll never be the same again because of me. I never wanted THAT! You've given me tools alright, now I'm more of threat to the people I care about than before. I can't believe you thought I'd want this!"
I stormed away from her and made my way to the infirmary. Siren was there, comatose. I pulled up a chair and stared at her still body. I was responsible. Argh. I rested my head in my hands and felt the tears come. Dear God this isn't what I wanted. I wanted to be strong and independent. I wanted to be a woman and have a normal sexual life. Look where I am. Look what I've done.
I stayed by Siren's side for two weeks, avoiding Mystique and the other Brothers. Siren never regained consciousness. I decided enough was enough. One morning I woke early and packed my bag. Then I snuck down to the infirmary and wrapped Siren in some blankets and a sweatsuit. Once I was satisfied, I picked her up and cradled her in my arms. As I climbed the stairs to leave, Mystique met me at the landing. She looked angry and sad at the same time.
"Can I ask what you're doing?"
"I'm leaving. Isn't that obvious?"
"And Siren?"
"I'm responsible for her. I'm taking her to get some help. And help for myself."
"You mean back to Professor Xavier?"
"Yes" She shook her head and a snarl grew on her face. "Coward! You're so weak it makes me sick. You don't have the backbone to help yourself. You have to run back to those people who failed you first time. Run. Run away again."
"They didn't fail me. I failed them. Things will be different now. You did help me. You did show me that *I* have to take control of my future. That's what I'm doing. I'm admitting I need help, but not your help. I'm sorry."
"When we meet again, we will be enemies."
"I wish it could be different, but if you feel that way, so be it."
She was so angry I started to feel guilty. But then I looked at Siren, unconscious, and my resolve strengthened. I stepped past her and launched myself into the air. I wasn't sure how long of a flight it would be but I kept my concentration by studying the landscape as I made my way back to the Professor.
What would I say to him? Would he take me back? Would the others? Did they think I was dead? Would they care that I wasn't? And Logan. Damn Logan.
I recognized the estate from a distance and lowered myself to the ground, next to the bench where I'd almost taken my own life. I closed my eyes and tried to concentrate on the Professor.
~Professor? Can you hear me? It's me, Rogue.~
~Rogue! Where -- Come in! Come in!~
I realized I'd been holding my breath, waiting to see if he'd welcome me back. He sounded genuinely happy to hear from me and that was wonderful news! Still carrying Siren, I walked up the grounds to the main house. Some of the students were outside, either playing or practicing their skills. They looked at me with curiosity - after all, I WAS carrying a comatose woman. Some started whispering when they realized who I was. I straightened my back and continued walking.The front doors swung open and the Professor was there, smiling. Ororo came up behind him, then Scott and Jean. They were all smiling until they saw what I was carrying.
"Rogue, who is that? What's wrong?"
I shook my head to the questions and carried her down to the X-men's medical room. I felt good being back here. I hoped Siren would be comfortable here as well. When I laid her on the table, Jean immediately started checking her out.
"Rogue, what's going on? Where have you been? We thought - Who is she?" Scott was anxious and I couldn't blame him.
"Her name is Siren. She's a mutant, or at least she was. She's in a coma because of me. I-I-I was fighting her, sparring really. But it turned ugly. I touched her. Too long. Way too long. She collapsed, comatose. She's been like this for more than two weeks."
"How are *you*?" the Professor asked, concern written all over his face.
"Physically? I couldn't be better. I absorbed her powers ... apparently permanently."
"Permanently? What were her powers?" Scott asked. I told them.
Dead silence in the room. Was is fear? Fear of me?
"How are you mentally?" the Professor asked, touching my arm.I shrugged as the tears welled up in my eyes.
"She's inside me, you know? Her memories, her thoughts, her personality." I said quietly. "Can you help her, Professor?"
"I don't know, Rogue. We'll see. Why don't you take your bag upstairs and get some sleep. Storm, could you ...?"
Ororo, always so gentle with me, guided me up the stairs and to an empty room. I put down my bag and sighed. Suddenly she hugged me, tight. The tears spilled out on their own and I sobbed.
"So much is different now. I'm so afraid of what I've become."
"Shhhh. Don't worry about this for now. Just get some sleep and we'll talk in the morning, ok?"
I nodded, grateful for the hug and the acceptance she showed me. She finally let me go and started to leave the room. As she was about to close the door, she smiled at me warmly.
"Welcome home, Marie."
Chapter 5
When I look back on the time I spent with Mystique and the Brotherhood, it wasn't all bad. Truly, she did understand my angst and isolation. And truly, she did help me find my place, though I would never have ever guessed how and how much it would cost.
With Magneto still incarcerated, Mystique was the head of the Brotherhood again. She had assumed Senator Kelly's position and slowly extracted him from public life. The real Senator Kelly was dead, of course, but she could always pull him out of 'retirement' if she needed his influence somewhere. Like Magneto, Mystique and the Brotherhood believed that the way to power was through humans, not with them. The Brotherhood did not have the respect for humans that the Professor has. The more time I spent with them, the more I understood the differences between these two sets of mutants.
The mutants who find their way to the Brotherhood all have the same thing in common - startling and sometimes grotesque physical mutations that make them obvious targets of discrimination. They all had felt the harsh rejection of humans and returned that rejection with an outlash of their powers.
The Professor's mutants could pretty much all pass for normal. They had powers that didn't draw attention or cause people to stare. Even Scott's visor was passable to the average person. Maybe even a little cool.
And even though I could also pass for normal, I fit more with the Brotherhood than I cared to admit. I had a rage growing inside me that was threatening to take over. I didn't see it at the time, but Mystique was feeding that rage. She believed that once I fully accepted my rage then I'd be a permanent member of their side. She helped me through my depression and taught me how to be thankful for what I did have. But she did these things with an ulterior motive.
She asked me what I most wanted out of life. I told her in generalities but she eventually got me to mention a specific. Logan. I was afraid to bring this up with her because everyone knew of their fight at the Statue of Liberty. Logan had stabbed her and left her for dead. But she showed no signs of being upset.
"Wolverine, eh? I can't say I blame you. He's very good looking... and a good fighter."
"He sees me as a child"
"Well aren't you?"
My glared at her in defiance.
"I am NOT. I'm a woman."
Mystique just shook her head and chuckled to herself.
"You might have the body of a woman, but you're still a scared little girl, looking for a man to protect you." She looked me up and down. "Protect YOURSELF. Don't rely on anyone to come rescue you. Save yourself."
Words I live by, even today.
During my time with the Brotherhood I became proficient at the more frowned upon arts. I became a marksman with handguns, I learned to pick locks with ease and I mastered using and misdirecting humans. Guards, particularly.
Mystique told me that like other organizations, they too need to recruit people. She asked me to evaluate a new member who had joined. I first saw her in the drawing room, talking to Mystique. She was a little taller than me, and a little older, maybe 23 or 25. She was beautiful too. She had black hair, and a curvacious womanly body. But like Mystique, she was marked by her skin. She had greenish tinted skin that matched her eyes. She was dressed in a form-fitting pair of jeans, a black leather jacket and a white t-shirt. I couldn't take my eyes off of her for some reason. She was so oddly beautiful but completely comfortable with her attractiveness. When she walked, she swayed her hips and smiled at the men, a devilish glint in her eyes.
A femme fatale in living flesh.
Later that evening, we all sat down and had dinner together. She ignored me and talked to Mystique and the others. She told them of her powers and how they could benefit their cause. She had the power of flight, near imperviousness and super human strength. As a demonstration, she picked up a fire place poker and twisted it into a pretzel. Mystique nodded her approval. Mystique questioned me later that evening.
"So what do you think of her?"
"She's definitely powerful, that's for sure. What's her name?"
"She calls herself Siren." I was about to say 'What kind of name is Siren' but I held my tongue. Afterall, what kind of name is Rogue?
"Where's she been until now?"
"Europe. Alaska. Canada. She, uh, claims to know Wolverine."
My head snapped up so fast I nearly hurt myself but I tried to act non-chalant.
"Oh? How does she know him?"
"To quote her, 'intimately'."
Jealousy. It's an ugly feeling. And I was feeling it all over. Logan had been with her?
"Does she know where Wolverine is now?"
Mystique shook her head. "She was last with him about 4 months ago."
I tried to hide my disappointment. The one thing I hadn't mastered yet was a poker face. My emotions were still broadcast across my face.
"Don't worry, Rogue, you'll find him again. And you'll blow him away. He won't know what to think."
"I hope you're right."
Siren hung around the castle for a few days and my reaction to her was growing stronger all the time. I'd thought my feelings about Jean were strong, but here was a woman who'd slept with Logan after he left me at the mansion. Bastard! BASTARD! Siren made it worse by talking about those exploits in front of me. She talked about how animalistic he was, how powerful he'd been. It amused her to see me upset. I tried to avoid her, but we were forced together all the time.
Then came my eighteenth birthday. Mystique said she had a special gift for me but I'd have to wait until after the day's workout. The workout was when members sparred with each other in an effort to keep sharp. Today, I was paired with Siren. Oh joy.
The workout area was outside in the fresh air and sun. I welcomed this, even if I didn't want to fight Siren. I didn't know if she knew of my 'power' so I decided to wait and see how she attacked. To my surprise, Siren apparently had no love for me, either. She started off the match by punching me in the head and knocking me down. I got up and brushed the dirt from my butt and tried to ignore the throbbing pain. Siren taunted me, daring me to attack, to show her something. As I moved toward her, she grabbed my arm and flipped me over onto my back, knocking the wind from my lungs. I lay gasping for air as the sound of her mocking laughter filled my ears.
"My god, is THIS the quality of mutants the Brotherhood's attracting these days? What's your power, little girl, the ability to act like a punching bag?" She kicked my ribs and spat on the ground next to my head.
It's hard for me to describe how full of wrath I was at that moment. I was seething with rage as I staggered to my feet. Think, idiot. Think. I clutched my side where she kicked me and put one hand out in front of me.
"Wait, you win. I give up."
Siren laughed and danced around like Rocky. I tried to stand up straight and casually took off my gloves in a show of giving up the fight. I extended my hand and in her excitement of winning, she didn't notice or care that my glove was off. As her hand touched mine, she immediately knew something was wrong.
Siren immediately tried to pull her hand away, but the process had already begun. I could easily control her hand in mine and not allow her to remove it. The smug smile that had lived on her face disappeared from her and appeared on mine. She fell to her knees and begged for mercy but my mind was blurred by anger, revenge. The seconds ticked by and as they did, more of her power flowed into me. But when Siren's eyes rolled back in her head I suddenly snapped out of what I was doing. I don't want to KILL her! I shook my head as though to clear some kind of cobwebs and let go of her hand.
But to my surprise, Mystique appeared out of no where and clamped my hand back onto Siren's with her own gloved hand. I'd held onto Logan a total of 58 seconds, the longest was only 39 seconds. I was well over a minute and half with Siren. Mystique was smiling as Siren struggled against the pain. She eventually made a gurgling sound and collapsed, a dead weight pulling on my hand. Only then did Mystique allow me to remove my hand from Siren's. I staggered backwards, confused, upset, in shock.
"Oh my God, what did I do? Is she dead?" I whispered. My eyes were wide with fright, fear that I'd taken a life.
Mystique touched Siren's throat and then opened her eyelids, one at a time.
"She's not dead. She's probably in a coma." My hand flew to my mouth to cover the gasp. No, what did I do?
"Will she be alright?" I watched as two Brothers carried Siren's body inside.
"I don't know, but we'll watch her. I'm more concerned about you. How do YOU feel?"
"What do you mean? Upset, of course! I didn't mean to - "
"Not that! I meant, can you feel her powers in you? Her strength, her ability to fly."
I didn't want to admit it before, but yes, I could. Physically, I felt fantastic.
"Yes, I can feel them."
"Try them. Go on." Mystique urged me on, eager to see what I could do.
I pushed off with my toes and suddenly I was flying through the air. Tears of joy blurred my vision as I danced in the air. Nothing compares with the joy of flying, soaring through the air like a bird. Storm had been the only other person I knew who could fly and she'd never told me how beautiful it was. I was having so much fun with my new 'toy' I barely heard Mystique on the ground calling me. I made a clumsy two footed landed but my face was beaming with happiness. Mystique was holding a six foot long piece of pipe in her hands.
"Are you ready to see about the other powers? Her imperviousness?" I nodded hesitantly and braced myself as I saw the pipe being swung around to hit me. I felt the contact, but no pain. I opened my eyes to find Mystique laughing. The pipe had bent around my body. Rather than knocking me down, the pipe had bent. I started laughing too. She handed the bent pipe to me and nodded. Siren's strength. With seemingly no effort, I bent the pipe back straight and then into a knot.
"This is incredible! I feel fantastic! How long do you think it will last?" I danced around the grounds, my feet barely touching the ground. Mystique waited until I came back to her to answer. I was giddy and flushed with happiness.
"Last? My dear Rogue, 'this' will last until you die. It's permanent. THIS is your gift. Happy Birthday."
My heart sank like a rock. As high as I had been feeling, that's how low I suddenly felt. No, it couldn't be true. Siren wouldn't recover her abilities? I'd stolen them? Stolen. I was a thief. A villain. I was the bad guy. I shook my head in disbelief and denial. No. No, Siren will get better. She has to. I can't live with that kind of guilt.
Mystique must have noticed my devastation because the next thing I felt was her gloved hand slapping me across the face. I glared at her and saw she was furious at me.
"What's WRONG with you?! I gave you a wonderful gift. You're now one of the most powerful mutants out there! Everyone will fear you! And this is how you react? This is how you repay me? Have a backbone, woman. I've given you the tools to do anything. ANYTHING!"
"At what price? I've destroyed someone. Siren's gone. She'll never be the same again because of me. I never wanted THAT! You've given me tools alright, now I'm more of threat to the people I care about than before. I can't believe you thought I'd want this!"
I stormed away from her and made my way to the infirmary. Siren was there, comatose. I pulled up a chair and stared at her still body. I was responsible. Argh. I rested my head in my hands and felt the tears come. Dear God this isn't what I wanted. I wanted to be strong and independent. I wanted to be a woman and have a normal sexual life. Look where I am. Look what I've done.
I stayed by Siren's side for two weeks, avoiding Mystique and the other Brothers. Siren never regained consciousness. I decided enough was enough. One morning I woke early and packed my bag. Then I snuck down to the infirmary and wrapped Siren in some blankets and a sweatsuit. Once I was satisfied, I picked her up and cradled her in my arms. As I climbed the stairs to leave, Mystique met me at the landing. She looked angry and sad at the same time.
"Can I ask what you're doing?"
"I'm leaving. Isn't that obvious?"
"And Siren?"
"I'm responsible for her. I'm taking her to get some help. And help for myself."
"You mean back to Professor Xavier?"
"Yes" She shook her head and a snarl grew on her face. "Coward! You're so weak it makes me sick. You don't have the backbone to help yourself. You have to run back to those people who failed you first time. Run. Run away again."
"They didn't fail me. I failed them. Things will be different now. You did help me. You did show me that *I* have to take control of my future. That's what I'm doing. I'm admitting I need help, but not your help. I'm sorry."
"When we meet again, we will be enemies."
"I wish it could be different, but if you feel that way, so be it."
She was so angry I started to feel guilty. But then I looked at Siren, unconscious, and my resolve strengthened. I stepped past her and launched myself into the air. I wasn't sure how long of a flight it would be but I kept my concentration by studying the landscape as I made my way back to the Professor.
What would I say to him? Would he take me back? Would the others? Did they think I was dead? Would they care that I wasn't? And Logan. Damn Logan.
I recognized the estate from a distance and lowered myself to the ground, next to the bench where I'd almost taken my own life. I closed my eyes and tried to concentrate on the Professor.
~Professor? Can you hear me? It's me, Rogue.~
~Rogue! Where -- Come in! Come in!~
I realized I'd been holding my breath, waiting to see if he'd welcome me back. He sounded genuinely happy to hear from me and that was wonderful news! Still carrying Siren, I walked up the grounds to the main house. Some of the students were outside, either playing or practicing their skills. They looked at me with curiosity - after all, I WAS carrying a comatose woman. Some started whispering when they realized who I was. I straightened my back and continued walking.The front doors swung open and the Professor was there, smiling. Ororo came up behind him, then Scott and Jean. They were all smiling until they saw what I was carrying.
"Rogue, who is that? What's wrong?"
I shook my head to the questions and carried her down to the X-men's medical room. I felt good being back here. I hoped Siren would be comfortable here as well. When I laid her on the table, Jean immediately started checking her out.
"Rogue, what's going on? Where have you been? We thought - Who is she?" Scott was anxious and I couldn't blame him.
"Her name is Siren. She's a mutant, or at least she was. She's in a coma because of me. I-I-I was fighting her, sparring really. But it turned ugly. I touched her. Too long. Way too long. She collapsed, comatose. She's been like this for more than two weeks."
"How are *you*?" the Professor asked, concern written all over his face.
"Physically? I couldn't be better. I absorbed her powers ... apparently permanently."
"Permanently? What were her powers?" Scott asked. I told them.
Dead silence in the room. Was is fear? Fear of me?
"How are you mentally?" the Professor asked, touching my arm.I shrugged as the tears welled up in my eyes.
"She's inside me, you know? Her memories, her thoughts, her personality." I said quietly. "Can you help her, Professor?"
"I don't know, Rogue. We'll see. Why don't you take your bag upstairs and get some sleep. Storm, could you ...?"
Ororo, always so gentle with me, guided me up the stairs and to an empty room. I put down my bag and sighed. Suddenly she hugged me, tight. The tears spilled out on their own and I sobbed.
"So much is different now. I'm so afraid of what I've become."
"Shhhh. Don't worry about this for now. Just get some sleep and we'll talk in the morning, ok?"
I nodded, grateful for the hug and the acceptance she showed me. She finally let me go and started to leave the room. As she was about to close the door, she smiled at me warmly.
"Welcome home, Marie."