*Author's note; I hate writer's block!
~
It was raining outside, so instead of the roof Abby went to stand under an awning in the ambulence bay. She would have stood in the rain if it wouldn't have evoked stares from everyone else in the ER. Abby loved the rain, especially the way it smelled. She always thought it was very cleansing.
"There you are."
Abby looked over to see Luka smiling down on her. She smiled back, glad to see he was happy. But the smile soon faded. She was too preoccupied to be happy.
"How have you been?" he asked her.
"I'm alright. And you?" she asked in reply.
"I've been pretty good. I've been looking for a house."
"What happened to the warehouse in the meat district?"
"I took your advice about the smell and I passed. Besides, a house will be a better investment."
"Luka," Abby said, "I'm sorry I was such a disappointment to you. I don't know what went wrong. I've never had anyone take care of me before."
"I was just trying to return the favor. And you weren't a disappointment to me. I'm disappointed it didn't work out, but I never thought down on you. You helped me get out of a very dark place."
"I don't know. I mean, I thought my problems were so stupid compared to what you went through. I just couldn't put that on you. Maybe it's better this way."
"It probably is, and you still mean a lot to me Abby. I still want to be your friend," he said.
"I'd like that," she said with a smile that quickly faded.
"So what's bothering you now?" Luka asked.
"He's leaving."
"Who? Carter?"
Abby took a deep breath and nodded.
"He got a call today that they want to hire him up in New York. I'm never going to see him again."
Luka's heart sank. He had always had a sneaking suspicion that Carter was the reason Abby never opened up to him. Now his suspicions were confirmed. She cared for Carter, probably as more than a friend, even if she'd never admit it.
But he and Abby weren't together anymore. More than anything he wanted to see her happy, and if he couldn't do it, who was he to hold her back from something that might?
"So why don't you tell him you don't want him to leave?" Luka asked.
"What right do I have to tell him that?" she questioned.
"You're his friend. Probably his best friend. If you don't tell him how you feel, how is he ever going to know?"
Abby stood silently, not knowing what to say.
"I've always been jealous over the fact that you talked to Carter and not me," Luka continued. "But now I realize that's exactly what you need. You need someone you feel you can talk to. Don't start holding back from him now, Abby. You'll regret it if you do."
Abby continued to be silent, staring straight ahead and pondering what Luka had just told her. Luka gently touched her shoulder before leaving her with her thoughts.
Abby couldn't believe what he'd just said. What had been holding her back the most was his feelings. She couldn't bring herself to do anything that might hurt him further. But here he was telling her to go with her feelings. He was right too. How was Carter supposed to know how she felt if she never spoke up? Abby knew deep down that Luka was right. She would regret it for the rest of her life if she didn't at least try.
~
"So you're really leaving?" Malucci asked Carter as he approached the front desk.
"Yup. Friday's my last day at County," Carter explained as he picked out a chart.
"So why are you going?"
"I guess I just need a change of scenery, Dave."
"So it has nothing to do with a certain brunette nurse?"
"No it doesn't. I'd just rather work at a place where my colleages didn't ask so many damn questions," Carter snidely replied as he grabbed a chart and walked away.
How dare Malucci ask him that. It was no one's business why he was leaving. No one needed to know why, not even the "certain brunette nurse." Carter wouldn't let anyone know the real reason. No one would care anyway.
"You did know that her and Luka broke up?" Malucci called down the hall as he was walking away.
Carter stopped in his tracks and then turned around.
"No. I didn't know that."
"Yeah, about two weeks ago."
Carter nodded slowly and then went on his way again.
Abby and Luka broke up and she never told him. In his mind, that sealed the deal. If she did have feelings for him, then she should have came to him right away. But she didn't, and that said a lot to John Carter.
~
"Abby, you're soaking wet," commented Dr. Weaver as Abby passed by her.
"Yeah. I went to Doc Magoo's for a sandwich," she explained, holding up the wrapped sandwhich she had in her hand. Abby really wasn't that hungry. The sandwhich was just an excuse to walk in the rain. She went to the storage closet and got a flimsy towel to dry her hair and some dry scrubs to change into. She then headed to the bathroom to change and dry off before heading to the lounge to eat.
Just as she took her first bite, Malucci burst through the door to inform her that a multiple trauma had come in and she was needed. She shrugged her shoulder's and put the sandwhich down on the table. She had been in a better mood ever since her walk in the rain.
Abby pushed open the doors to the first trauma room she came across. Low and behold, Carter was the doctor in charge of the trauma she'd just chose. Her heart jumped slightly, but she didn't miss a beat. Instead, she dove right in and proved to be a great help, predicting Carter's moves almost before he made them. Carter did a beautiful job himself, having the injured young man stable and on his way to surgery in approxiamately ten minutes.
"Good job Carter," said Dr. Weaver after she walked in the room to get the injured's status. "We're definitly going to miss you when you're gone."
"Thank you, Dr. Weaver," he said, truely apreciating those words since they came from the mouth of Kerry Weaver.
Turning to Abby he said, "That was great Abby. It's like you were reading my mind."
"Thanks," she replied, trying to decide what she was going to say next. "John, do you have a minute? I'd really like to talk with you."
"Yeah, I guess so," he replied, nervous about the topic she wanted to discuss. He had been waiting, well, more like hoping for her to ask him to stay. All she had to say was "don't go", and he'd change his whole world for her.
"Abby," said Lilly as she stuck her head through the door. "You have an urget phone call."
"Can it wait?" she replied.
"It's your brother. He sounds pretty anxious."
"Eric?" Abby thought to herself. "He never calls me."
"Okay," she said. "I'll be right there." She then told Carter, "Give me one minute." She then left the trauma room, leaving him with his thoughts.
"If she really wanted me to stay she would've said something by now. Stop getting your hopes up, John. You'll just get hurt." He snapped his gloves off and slammed them into the medical waste container.
~
"Abby Loackhart," she said when she picked up the phone. "Eric? Slow down. What happened? Wow, I didn't even know you had a girlfriend. Fiance? Congradulations. What'd you name him? That's great. I'm happy for you, Eric. Yeah. Thanks for calling me. Uh-huh. I really appreciate it. Okay, bye."
"What was that about?" asked Lilly, who happened to be standing by and was anxious to have a new piece of gossip to share.
"My brother just had a baby boy. They named him Samuel."
"Hey, congradualtions. I guess that makes you a new aunt, huh?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
Lilly smiled and patted Abby on the back before leaving her. Abby, however, wasn't smiling. Sure, she was happy that she was an aunt, but that phone call made it clear how little she and her brother talked. She didn't know he was engaged, or that his fiance was pregnant. All she really knew about him anymore was where he lived and what he did for a living. It was a sad realization. Abby had very little family in the world, and it hurt her a little to know that they weren't acting like a family at all. Once again she had let something good slip through her fingers. All she had to have done was pick up the phone every once in a while.
"Hey Abby, you okay?" asked Dave Malucci, pulling her out of her trance.
"What? Yeah. My brother just had a baby."
"Congradulations."
"Have you seen Carter?"
"Yeah, his shift ended, so he went home."
"Dammit," she mumbled as she took off out the ER doors, hoping to catch him. But she was too late. He was long gone.
She asked Weaver if she could take the rest of her shift off, but she refused, and Abby just about cried at the news.
"Calm down Abby," she told herself. "You have til Friday. As long as you tell him before Friday, he won't leave you. He can't leave you."
~
It was raining outside, so instead of the roof Abby went to stand under an awning in the ambulence bay. She would have stood in the rain if it wouldn't have evoked stares from everyone else in the ER. Abby loved the rain, especially the way it smelled. She always thought it was very cleansing.
"There you are."
Abby looked over to see Luka smiling down on her. She smiled back, glad to see he was happy. But the smile soon faded. She was too preoccupied to be happy.
"How have you been?" he asked her.
"I'm alright. And you?" she asked in reply.
"I've been pretty good. I've been looking for a house."
"What happened to the warehouse in the meat district?"
"I took your advice about the smell and I passed. Besides, a house will be a better investment."
"Luka," Abby said, "I'm sorry I was such a disappointment to you. I don't know what went wrong. I've never had anyone take care of me before."
"I was just trying to return the favor. And you weren't a disappointment to me. I'm disappointed it didn't work out, but I never thought down on you. You helped me get out of a very dark place."
"I don't know. I mean, I thought my problems were so stupid compared to what you went through. I just couldn't put that on you. Maybe it's better this way."
"It probably is, and you still mean a lot to me Abby. I still want to be your friend," he said.
"I'd like that," she said with a smile that quickly faded.
"So what's bothering you now?" Luka asked.
"He's leaving."
"Who? Carter?"
Abby took a deep breath and nodded.
"He got a call today that they want to hire him up in New York. I'm never going to see him again."
Luka's heart sank. He had always had a sneaking suspicion that Carter was the reason Abby never opened up to him. Now his suspicions were confirmed. She cared for Carter, probably as more than a friend, even if she'd never admit it.
But he and Abby weren't together anymore. More than anything he wanted to see her happy, and if he couldn't do it, who was he to hold her back from something that might?
"So why don't you tell him you don't want him to leave?" Luka asked.
"What right do I have to tell him that?" she questioned.
"You're his friend. Probably his best friend. If you don't tell him how you feel, how is he ever going to know?"
Abby stood silently, not knowing what to say.
"I've always been jealous over the fact that you talked to Carter and not me," Luka continued. "But now I realize that's exactly what you need. You need someone you feel you can talk to. Don't start holding back from him now, Abby. You'll regret it if you do."
Abby continued to be silent, staring straight ahead and pondering what Luka had just told her. Luka gently touched her shoulder before leaving her with her thoughts.
Abby couldn't believe what he'd just said. What had been holding her back the most was his feelings. She couldn't bring herself to do anything that might hurt him further. But here he was telling her to go with her feelings. He was right too. How was Carter supposed to know how she felt if she never spoke up? Abby knew deep down that Luka was right. She would regret it for the rest of her life if she didn't at least try.
~
"So you're really leaving?" Malucci asked Carter as he approached the front desk.
"Yup. Friday's my last day at County," Carter explained as he picked out a chart.
"So why are you going?"
"I guess I just need a change of scenery, Dave."
"So it has nothing to do with a certain brunette nurse?"
"No it doesn't. I'd just rather work at a place where my colleages didn't ask so many damn questions," Carter snidely replied as he grabbed a chart and walked away.
How dare Malucci ask him that. It was no one's business why he was leaving. No one needed to know why, not even the "certain brunette nurse." Carter wouldn't let anyone know the real reason. No one would care anyway.
"You did know that her and Luka broke up?" Malucci called down the hall as he was walking away.
Carter stopped in his tracks and then turned around.
"No. I didn't know that."
"Yeah, about two weeks ago."
Carter nodded slowly and then went on his way again.
Abby and Luka broke up and she never told him. In his mind, that sealed the deal. If she did have feelings for him, then she should have came to him right away. But she didn't, and that said a lot to John Carter.
~
"Abby, you're soaking wet," commented Dr. Weaver as Abby passed by her.
"Yeah. I went to Doc Magoo's for a sandwich," she explained, holding up the wrapped sandwhich she had in her hand. Abby really wasn't that hungry. The sandwhich was just an excuse to walk in the rain. She went to the storage closet and got a flimsy towel to dry her hair and some dry scrubs to change into. She then headed to the bathroom to change and dry off before heading to the lounge to eat.
Just as she took her first bite, Malucci burst through the door to inform her that a multiple trauma had come in and she was needed. She shrugged her shoulder's and put the sandwhich down on the table. She had been in a better mood ever since her walk in the rain.
Abby pushed open the doors to the first trauma room she came across. Low and behold, Carter was the doctor in charge of the trauma she'd just chose. Her heart jumped slightly, but she didn't miss a beat. Instead, she dove right in and proved to be a great help, predicting Carter's moves almost before he made them. Carter did a beautiful job himself, having the injured young man stable and on his way to surgery in approxiamately ten minutes.
"Good job Carter," said Dr. Weaver after she walked in the room to get the injured's status. "We're definitly going to miss you when you're gone."
"Thank you, Dr. Weaver," he said, truely apreciating those words since they came from the mouth of Kerry Weaver.
Turning to Abby he said, "That was great Abby. It's like you were reading my mind."
"Thanks," she replied, trying to decide what she was going to say next. "John, do you have a minute? I'd really like to talk with you."
"Yeah, I guess so," he replied, nervous about the topic she wanted to discuss. He had been waiting, well, more like hoping for her to ask him to stay. All she had to say was "don't go", and he'd change his whole world for her.
"Abby," said Lilly as she stuck her head through the door. "You have an urget phone call."
"Can it wait?" she replied.
"It's your brother. He sounds pretty anxious."
"Eric?" Abby thought to herself. "He never calls me."
"Okay," she said. "I'll be right there." She then told Carter, "Give me one minute." She then left the trauma room, leaving him with his thoughts.
"If she really wanted me to stay she would've said something by now. Stop getting your hopes up, John. You'll just get hurt." He snapped his gloves off and slammed them into the medical waste container.
~
"Abby Loackhart," she said when she picked up the phone. "Eric? Slow down. What happened? Wow, I didn't even know you had a girlfriend. Fiance? Congradulations. What'd you name him? That's great. I'm happy for you, Eric. Yeah. Thanks for calling me. Uh-huh. I really appreciate it. Okay, bye."
"What was that about?" asked Lilly, who happened to be standing by and was anxious to have a new piece of gossip to share.
"My brother just had a baby boy. They named him Samuel."
"Hey, congradualtions. I guess that makes you a new aunt, huh?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
Lilly smiled and patted Abby on the back before leaving her. Abby, however, wasn't smiling. Sure, she was happy that she was an aunt, but that phone call made it clear how little she and her brother talked. She didn't know he was engaged, or that his fiance was pregnant. All she really knew about him anymore was where he lived and what he did for a living. It was a sad realization. Abby had very little family in the world, and it hurt her a little to know that they weren't acting like a family at all. Once again she had let something good slip through her fingers. All she had to have done was pick up the phone every once in a while.
"Hey Abby, you okay?" asked Dave Malucci, pulling her out of her trance.
"What? Yeah. My brother just had a baby."
"Congradulations."
"Have you seen Carter?"
"Yeah, his shift ended, so he went home."
"Dammit," she mumbled as she took off out the ER doors, hoping to catch him. But she was too late. He was long gone.
She asked Weaver if she could take the rest of her shift off, but she refused, and Abby just about cried at the news.
"Calm down Abby," she told herself. "You have til Friday. As long as you tell him before Friday, he won't leave you. He can't leave you."