The Weakest Wizard
Chapter 4
McGonagall: Alright, 2 rounds down, 6 to go. You have FINALLY banked a pathetic 10,000 Galleons. Mr. Potter and Miss Chang have been 'voted off' as the weakest link, although 5 of you aren't far behind them. Right, well, we will start with the strongest link of last round, which is Hermonie.
Hermonie, what are the--
Hermonie- nuetrons, protons, and electrons...of the human body of course.
McGonagall- *flips through papers* uh, yes, thats right! Wow. Um, Draco, who fought in the French-Indian war?
Draco- Let me think.....um, I'm pretty sure it is the Yogosalavians (s/p? sorry) and the Djiboutians!!!!!
McGonagall- AHHHHHH! *pulls out some hair* ARE YOU COMPLETELY HOPELESS??????
Draco- Well, no, not completely.....
McGonagall- Crabbe, Russians recently got very upset because they believed there was a shortage of what alcoholic drink?
Crabbe- *looks down at the cheese he is snacking on and says very confidently* yellow cheese!
McGonagall- NO!!!!!!!! MAN! WHO LET YOU GET ONTO THIS SHOW?
Crabbe- cheese?
McGonagall- Seamus, and don't you dare say 'bank', what country is also called the Emerald Isle? *oh no*
Seamus-
McGonagall- correct! Parvati, who wrote the book "Little Women?"
Parvati- *instantly turns into a settler with old 'home on the range' music playing* (---what that has to do with the book...I don't know) Little Women, writtin by Louisa May Alcott, is one of those rare books that enjoy eternal youth and perpetual popularity. To young readers of today in almost anywhere in the world the lives of Meg and Jo and Beth and Amy March are as real as they were to young New Englanders in 1868, when the book was first published. It-
McGonagall- OK, ENOUGH! I JUST WANTED TO KNOW THE AUTHOR!!!!
GEEZ!!!! Ron, what is 2+2?
Ron- Oh, toughy.....not! How's about 4???
McGonagall- Geez, that was a givin one!!! Um, Draco, (screams bank, and banks 10,000 galleons) what rank of power is Muggle Prime Minister Tony Blarie?
Draco- Oh, man, isn't he the Queen????
McGonagall- NOOOOO! THAT WAS A GIVIN! WHYYYYY ARE YOU SOOOO STUPID!?!!? *sigh* Crabbe, oh never mind, I already know your answer!
Crabbe- Cheese?
McGonagall- um, its wrong neways. Seamus, name a large western island of the British Isle that starts with an "I."
Seamus- *(covered in scratches, missing teeth, and a black eye) looks around fearfully, as if looking for the S.W.A.T. members* I-I-Ireland? *winces and ducks, sees nothing happens and stands up with a sigh of relief, as soon as he does that the S.W.A.T. members drop down and tackle him again*
McGonagall- Parvati, when did the dinosaurs begin to become extinct?
Parvati- The dinosaurs are believed to become ultimatley extinct 65 million years ago, the cause is still un---
McGonagall- OK OK ENOUGH! You answered the question! Thats all I need! It's correct!!!! *buzzer beeps* Alright the time is up. You banked 15,000 Galleons with a grand total of 25,000 Galleons. You may now vote for your opinion on the weakest link.
Lupin- The strongest link in this round is Parvati (Hermonie didnt let McGonagall finish once and Seamus failed to answer the question completely once. And, in my opinon, that takes away points :)) The weakest are Crabbe and Draco (once again).
McGonagall- Alright, Mr. Weasly, who have you picked as the 'weakest link?'
Ron- Crabbe
Hermonie- Draco
Draco- Hermonie *Hermonie bursts out in tears for someone actually thinking she was a wink link*
Crabbe- Professor McGonagall
McGonagall- Mr. Crabbe, what is that supposed to mean.
Crabbe- Um, I think you are the weakest link, Professor. I mean, you have not answered ONE question!
*audience snickers* McGonagall- Honestly, Crabbe. I AM THE HOOOOST! I DONT ANSWER THE QUESTIONS, I ASK THEM!!!!!!! GEEEEZ!
Crabbe- Oh, in that case, Malfoy (stops his smirking and goes "WHAT?!?!?!?")
Seamus- Malfoy
Parvati- William Henry Harrison?
McGonagall- First, Parvati, why William Henry Harrison?
Parvati- *rolls her eyes as if it is obvious* Well, duh, professor, the guy was weak! He only lasted in office for, what, like 30 days? I mean, CRABBE can last longer than that!
McGonagall- Well, come to think of it, the guy was kind of weak. heh. *ghost of Harrison in the audience bursts out crying,"a-a-and I t-t-thought I was g-g-good for the short time I was in there." The ghost of Abe Lincoln, pats him on the back saying, "It's alright, you were good. Besides, you didn't want to be in there for a whole two terms. Let alone one. Its tough, man." Moody, who happens to be beside the two runs out of the audience screaming his head off about ghosts threating to kill him*
McGonagall- riiiiight. Well, the statistics show it....Mr. Malfoy, you ARE the weakest link......goodbye!
*BACKSTAGE*
Draco- It's not my fault! I got all the hard questions! I mean, 'when was the War of 1812?' Honestly! I don't memorize the years from each war! And then 'who is buried in Grant's Tomb?' Like I should know!!!!! I don't remember who is buried in every single tomb! Geez! It's like, this was planned!
*ONSTAGE*
McGonagall- Another round gone, and we are getting closer to the final two. We still have Ron, Hermonie, Crabbe (c'mon, guys, what are you thinking keeping this guy off??), Seamus, and Parvati!! You ask me if you are doing well? No.....no......no.......no......no.....oh wait, oops, false alarm, still no!!!!!
*remaining contestents all go 'awwwwwwwww, man!'*
McGonagall- We will be back with the 4th round, after this break!