The "Normal" Life of Mewtwo
Episode 2: Team Rocket Vs. the Super Annoying Sing Along!
"So, what do we do now?" Lord Voldemort asked.
"We wait." Mewtwo returned simply.
The two of them had opened up a fresh gym, got their gym license, and got their roster of pokémon all in less than five hours, thanks to the miracle of writing. They would put their gym into fruition, and unlike most gym leaders, they wouldn't need a second job to hold them through. Unfortunately, none seemed to notice their new gym.
"Good Lord, I'm bored..." Voldemort groaned. "No foolish challengers yet..."
"I feel a song coming on..." Mewtwo grinned evilly. He whipped out a guitar and began to strum. "OOOOOOOOO... OH my gosh I have a CAARR..."
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!" Voldemort sung horribly off-key.
"And ON that car I have a... SUPER BIG FRIGGIN' SHOTGUN!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"With a BAM-BAM here, and a COWPOOM there!"
"Here some gunpowder, and there some Firestone tires, here a BOOM! There a BLAT! Everywhere COWPOOM!"
"OOOHHH my gosh I have a CCAARR!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"AAAUUUGGGHHH!!! My eardrums have burst!!" a young junior trainer whined, running out of the gym. Unbeknownst to the singing duo, a young trainer had walked in during their singing, but they scared him away.
"I'm beginning to LIKE this song!" Voldemort crowed.
"It's just too bad we just lost our first challenger," Mewtwo rolled his eyes in sarcasm.
"Bummer! Ah well... let's go fer the second verse!"
"Okay..." Mewtwo pulled out his light tan guitar again and began to strum once more. "And ON that car I had a... COLLECTION OF CRUEL STICKERS!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"With a 'BEEP BEEP MY @$$' here and a 'Normal people worry me' there!"
"Here a 'Tell you kids to stop pointing at me' There a 'You say psycho like it's a bad thing' everywhere a 'I SEE DUMB PEOPLE!!!'"
"OOOHHH my gosh I have a CARRRR!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!" Voldemort finished.
"Umm... guys? Can I battle? I challenge you?" a Cool Trainer stared at the two of them with a raised eyebrow.
"Hmm? What? OOOO!!" Voldemort jumped up with glee. "So, you passed the test, huh?"
"What was the test?" The Cool Trainer and Mewtwo asked at the same time.
Voldemort nudged Mewtwo. "OOHH!! THAT TEST!" Mewtwo hopped happily. He then put on a much more serious voice. "You have passed the test, having survived the wrath of our Super Annoying Sing Along now allows you to challenge us. Which one will you take?" Mewtwo motioned between himself and Voldemort.
"I'll take you," said the trainer, pointing to Mewtwo.
"EXCELLENT." Mewtwo crowed. "My pokémon may look weak, but do not underestimate them. Go, my wickedly-useless-looking-but-very-powerful pokémon. GWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..." Mewtwo levitated a pokéball. It crashed to the ground and out came a Magikarp.
"HA! I'm not taking any chances. Raichu! Smoke 'em!" The trainer unleashed HIS pokéball with much more flair. Out came a demonic-looking Raichu, ready to pummel anything that got in his way. "Raichu! He may look pathetic, but don't underestimate him! Thunder Wave!" Raichu let out its wave of thunder, but Magikarp flopped and dodged it.
"Magikarp, Bubble breath," Mewtwo said casually. Magikarp let out a stream of bubbles, and Raichu was blinded.
"Raichu! Focus!' Shouted its trainer.
"Rai! RAI!" It cried. Mewtwo heard, however, "I can't see! I can't SEE!"
"Magikarp, Mysterious Beam," Mewtwo crowed. Magikarp showed no mercy as it fired a black beam. Raichu was blown away.
"Holy crud... Return.." the dejected trainer grumbled. He felt around, but suddenly he became VERY unhappy. "WHAT??!!! That's my only pokémon??!!! NNNOOOOOO-"
*POW!!* The trainer was smacked with a giant meteor, sending him flying out of the gym.
"Come back again, you hear?" Voldemort yelled out to the trainer. "That way, we can have more fun kickin' your rear! Bye-bye!!!"
"Nice Meteor," Mewtwo smirked.
"I learned that in Final Fantasy class!" Voldemort said.
"I guess it's back to singing..."
"More like it's back to Team Rocket. Mwahahahahahaha..." A mysteriously mysterious voice popped mysteriously from out of nowhere.
"Team Rocket is attacking us?" Mewtwo said with mock fear and respect. "I'm so honored!"
"Better get ready 'cause here we come!" a second mysteriously mysterious-
"HEY! Lay off of mysterious, will ya?" Mewtwo glared at the author.
What? I LIKE that word!
"But the way you say it, it's too annoying!"
HEY, I'll start with "shadowy" again if you don't stop interrupting your own story!
"Okay, okay!"
ANYWAY, a second voice rang from the ceiling. "Prepare for our motto!"
"I'm preparing, all right," Voldemort groaned, putting on earmuffs.
"PREPARRRREEE for TROUBLE!!!!"
"And make it double..."
"Better watch out! Team Rocket has come from afars!"
"We've come to kick your @$$ to the stars."
"We're going to spell your DOOM!"
"We'll smell up the place with evil faster than a dark Gloom."
"Taz!" A strawberry-blond boy landed in front of the two.
"Keeli." An almost albino girl, seriously attractive and evil looking landed.
"Team Rocket, the villains that always exit stage right!"
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all-goodnight." Keeli and Taz looked at each other before laughing hysterically.
"H**l yeah, that's... right?" A New Jersey accented Sneasel appeared, but his debut was ruined as he saw Taz and Keeli laughing for no apparent reason. "What's so funny?"
"Taz! What did those last two lines have to do with our motto?" Keeli said between laughs.
"I-HAHAHA-don't know-HAHAHAHA-it was-HOHOHEEHE-just-HA-funny-HAHAHAHAA!!"
"You IDIOTS!!!" Sneasel smacked the two of them. "We're supposed ta gets Mewtwo! Not crack motto jokes!"
"For your intrusion in my gym, I will make sure you exit stage LEFT," Mewtwo growled and unleashed his full psychic power. Of course it did nothing to Sneasel, but what shocked Mewtwo was that Keeli seemed to block it, and Taz only looked like he got caught in a sudden gust of wind. Keeli rose and her eyes glowered red.
"That's just too bad, eh?" She said, growing an EEEEEVIL smile. "We were genetically engineered to ESPECIALLY deal with you. We have resistance to psychic power and we even have mile-high special defense. Not your cup of tea, is it? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..."
"Put a sock in it!" Voldemort yelled. He summoned another Meteor, crashing into the maniacally laughing Keeli. Mewtwo used a Dynamic Punch on Sneasel to prove just how sorry his defense is.
"We're not giving up!" Taz sneered. He pulled out a bow and some arrows, tipped the first arrow with fire from his hand and shot at Lord Voldemort. Mewtwo, however caught the arrow with his hand just as it was about to render Voldemort kibbles and bits.
"I'm not about to leave a sorry mark!" Sneasel screamed. "RRAAARRRRR!!" He leapt towards Mewtwo.
"They never give up, do they?" Mewtwo groaned.
"They're about to. Cleffa! Sic' em!" Voldemort commanded, throwing out a pokéball. Cleffa appeared, gave Sneasel one glance and landed a wicked punch right on his face. Sneasel crashed. Cleffa picked him up with ONE "hand" and slammed him on the ground repeatedly, twirled him around and threw him at Taz, who barely dodged.
"Hmph, FEEL MY WRATH! GO, my super evil po-kay-mon!!! GWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" Taz threw out a pokéball and out emerged a Gyarados. "Sic' em!"
"I do not 'sic' pokémon. It is uncivilized," it said much to everyone but Taz and Keeli's shock. (Sneasel was unconscious)
"MAN!! I can never get you to do ANYTHING!!!!" Taz whined. "Umm... smite them with the words from your dictionary!"
"Now you are talking my language." The civilized Gyarados pulled out a dictionary and began to read in a boring tone. Taz and Keeli put on earmuffs and stuck out their tongues at Mewtwo and Voldemort.
Cleffa was driven crazy in a matter of seconds, and Voldemort had to call it back before it would try to kill itself to spare the horror.
"What do we do?" Lord Voldemort whined to Mewtwo.
"We'll have to fight fire with fire!" Mewtwo shot back. He pulled out his guitar and cackled evilly.
"Okay!"
"Here we go!!" Mewtwo began to strum the guitar, much to everyone's surprise. "OOOOOOOOO... OH my gosh I have a CAARR..."
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!" Voldemort sung horribly off-key.
"And ON that car I have a... SUPER BIG FRIGGIN' SHOTGUN!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"With a BAM-BAM here, and a COWPOOM there!"
"Here some gunpowder, and there some Firestone tires, here a BOOM! There a BLAT! Everywhere COWPOOM!"
"OOOHHH my gosh I have a CCAARR!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"ARRGGHH!!! That song is irritating!" Taz yelled. "Even my earmuffs can't block those notes!!!"
"It is driving me mad!!" The Gyarados whined.
"Ungah..." Keeli fell to the floor as if she were being tortured by super sonic sound.
"Let's torture them some more!" Mewtwo crowed. "And ON that car I had a... COLLECTION OF CRUEL STICKERS!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"With a 'BEEP BEEP MY @$$' here and a 'Normal people worry me' there!"
"Here a 'Tell you kids to stop pointing at me' There a 'You say psycho like it's a bad thing' everywhere a 'I SEE DUMB PEOPLE!!!'"
"OOOHHH my gosh I have a CARRRR!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!" Voldemort finished.
"AAAAHHH!!! LET'S GET OUTTA HERE!!!!" Team Rocket whined. They turned tail and ran, crashing through the wall on the right. "Team Rocket's blasting off again!"
"What's this?" Mewtwo crowed. "You idiots exited STAGE LEFT!!!!! GWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!"
"Sayonara, SUCKERS!!" Voldemort whooped. "HOOOHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"
"Well, I guess it's back to waiting..." Mewtwo sighed.
"I think NOT!" Voldemort said. As he said this, a Lugia crashed into the gym. It flew with magnificent grace and landed in front of the two of them. Off stepped a silver-haired man, strangely dressed in shades of dark purple and platinum.
The platinum-haired youth spoke. "Am I too late for a gym challenge? Hello, you two," he took a swift bow. "I am Kuja."
That's it for episode 2! Next up!: Episode 3: IT'S KUJA!!!!
KUJA??!! Yeah. That's him all right, and he wished to join the duo after his Lugia single-handedly defeats all of their pokémon. But his welcome doesn't last long, as Kuja's younger brother has joined Team Rocket and wants THEM!!! Will they survive?!! All this and a bag of chips await you in the next episode of "The 'Normal' Life of Mewtwo"!!!
Episode 2: Team Rocket Vs. the Super Annoying Sing Along!
"So, what do we do now?" Lord Voldemort asked.
"We wait." Mewtwo returned simply.
The two of them had opened up a fresh gym, got their gym license, and got their roster of pokémon all in less than five hours, thanks to the miracle of writing. They would put their gym into fruition, and unlike most gym leaders, they wouldn't need a second job to hold them through. Unfortunately, none seemed to notice their new gym.
"Good Lord, I'm bored..." Voldemort groaned. "No foolish challengers yet..."
"I feel a song coming on..." Mewtwo grinned evilly. He whipped out a guitar and began to strum. "OOOOOOOOO... OH my gosh I have a CAARR..."
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!" Voldemort sung horribly off-key.
"And ON that car I have a... SUPER BIG FRIGGIN' SHOTGUN!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"With a BAM-BAM here, and a COWPOOM there!"
"Here some gunpowder, and there some Firestone tires, here a BOOM! There a BLAT! Everywhere COWPOOM!"
"OOOHHH my gosh I have a CCAARR!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"AAAUUUGGGHHH!!! My eardrums have burst!!" a young junior trainer whined, running out of the gym. Unbeknownst to the singing duo, a young trainer had walked in during their singing, but they scared him away.
"I'm beginning to LIKE this song!" Voldemort crowed.
"It's just too bad we just lost our first challenger," Mewtwo rolled his eyes in sarcasm.
"Bummer! Ah well... let's go fer the second verse!"
"Okay..." Mewtwo pulled out his light tan guitar again and began to strum once more. "And ON that car I had a... COLLECTION OF CRUEL STICKERS!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"With a 'BEEP BEEP MY @$$' here and a 'Normal people worry me' there!"
"Here a 'Tell you kids to stop pointing at me' There a 'You say psycho like it's a bad thing' everywhere a 'I SEE DUMB PEOPLE!!!'"
"OOOHHH my gosh I have a CARRRR!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!" Voldemort finished.
"Umm... guys? Can I battle? I challenge you?" a Cool Trainer stared at the two of them with a raised eyebrow.
"Hmm? What? OOOO!!" Voldemort jumped up with glee. "So, you passed the test, huh?"
"What was the test?" The Cool Trainer and Mewtwo asked at the same time.
Voldemort nudged Mewtwo. "OOHH!! THAT TEST!" Mewtwo hopped happily. He then put on a much more serious voice. "You have passed the test, having survived the wrath of our Super Annoying Sing Along now allows you to challenge us. Which one will you take?" Mewtwo motioned between himself and Voldemort.
"I'll take you," said the trainer, pointing to Mewtwo.
"EXCELLENT." Mewtwo crowed. "My pokémon may look weak, but do not underestimate them. Go, my wickedly-useless-looking-but-very-powerful pokémon. GWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..." Mewtwo levitated a pokéball. It crashed to the ground and out came a Magikarp.
"HA! I'm not taking any chances. Raichu! Smoke 'em!" The trainer unleashed HIS pokéball with much more flair. Out came a demonic-looking Raichu, ready to pummel anything that got in his way. "Raichu! He may look pathetic, but don't underestimate him! Thunder Wave!" Raichu let out its wave of thunder, but Magikarp flopped and dodged it.
"Magikarp, Bubble breath," Mewtwo said casually. Magikarp let out a stream of bubbles, and Raichu was blinded.
"Raichu! Focus!' Shouted its trainer.
"Rai! RAI!" It cried. Mewtwo heard, however, "I can't see! I can't SEE!"
"Magikarp, Mysterious Beam," Mewtwo crowed. Magikarp showed no mercy as it fired a black beam. Raichu was blown away.
"Holy crud... Return.." the dejected trainer grumbled. He felt around, but suddenly he became VERY unhappy. "WHAT??!!! That's my only pokémon??!!! NNNOOOOOO-"
*POW!!* The trainer was smacked with a giant meteor, sending him flying out of the gym.
"Come back again, you hear?" Voldemort yelled out to the trainer. "That way, we can have more fun kickin' your rear! Bye-bye!!!"
"Nice Meteor," Mewtwo smirked.
"I learned that in Final Fantasy class!" Voldemort said.
"I guess it's back to singing..."
"More like it's back to Team Rocket. Mwahahahahahaha..." A mysteriously mysterious voice popped mysteriously from out of nowhere.
"Team Rocket is attacking us?" Mewtwo said with mock fear and respect. "I'm so honored!"
"Better get ready 'cause here we come!" a second mysteriously mysterious-
"HEY! Lay off of mysterious, will ya?" Mewtwo glared at the author.
What? I LIKE that word!
"But the way you say it, it's too annoying!"
HEY, I'll start with "shadowy" again if you don't stop interrupting your own story!
"Okay, okay!"
ANYWAY, a second voice rang from the ceiling. "Prepare for our motto!"
"I'm preparing, all right," Voldemort groaned, putting on earmuffs.
"PREPARRRREEE for TROUBLE!!!!"
"And make it double..."
"Better watch out! Team Rocket has come from afars!"
"We've come to kick your @$$ to the stars."
"We're going to spell your DOOM!"
"We'll smell up the place with evil faster than a dark Gloom."
"Taz!" A strawberry-blond boy landed in front of the two.
"Keeli." An almost albino girl, seriously attractive and evil looking landed.
"Team Rocket, the villains that always exit stage right!"
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all-goodnight." Keeli and Taz looked at each other before laughing hysterically.
"H**l yeah, that's... right?" A New Jersey accented Sneasel appeared, but his debut was ruined as he saw Taz and Keeli laughing for no apparent reason. "What's so funny?"
"Taz! What did those last two lines have to do with our motto?" Keeli said between laughs.
"I-HAHAHA-don't know-HAHAHAHA-it was-HOHOHEEHE-just-HA-funny-HAHAHAHAA!!"
"You IDIOTS!!!" Sneasel smacked the two of them. "We're supposed ta gets Mewtwo! Not crack motto jokes!"
"For your intrusion in my gym, I will make sure you exit stage LEFT," Mewtwo growled and unleashed his full psychic power. Of course it did nothing to Sneasel, but what shocked Mewtwo was that Keeli seemed to block it, and Taz only looked like he got caught in a sudden gust of wind. Keeli rose and her eyes glowered red.
"That's just too bad, eh?" She said, growing an EEEEEVIL smile. "We were genetically engineered to ESPECIALLY deal with you. We have resistance to psychic power and we even have mile-high special defense. Not your cup of tea, is it? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..."
"Put a sock in it!" Voldemort yelled. He summoned another Meteor, crashing into the maniacally laughing Keeli. Mewtwo used a Dynamic Punch on Sneasel to prove just how sorry his defense is.
"We're not giving up!" Taz sneered. He pulled out a bow and some arrows, tipped the first arrow with fire from his hand and shot at Lord Voldemort. Mewtwo, however caught the arrow with his hand just as it was about to render Voldemort kibbles and bits.
"I'm not about to leave a sorry mark!" Sneasel screamed. "RRAAARRRRR!!" He leapt towards Mewtwo.
"They never give up, do they?" Mewtwo groaned.
"They're about to. Cleffa! Sic' em!" Voldemort commanded, throwing out a pokéball. Cleffa appeared, gave Sneasel one glance and landed a wicked punch right on his face. Sneasel crashed. Cleffa picked him up with ONE "hand" and slammed him on the ground repeatedly, twirled him around and threw him at Taz, who barely dodged.
"Hmph, FEEL MY WRATH! GO, my super evil po-kay-mon!!! GWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" Taz threw out a pokéball and out emerged a Gyarados. "Sic' em!"
"I do not 'sic' pokémon. It is uncivilized," it said much to everyone but Taz and Keeli's shock. (Sneasel was unconscious)
"MAN!! I can never get you to do ANYTHING!!!!" Taz whined. "Umm... smite them with the words from your dictionary!"
"Now you are talking my language." The civilized Gyarados pulled out a dictionary and began to read in a boring tone. Taz and Keeli put on earmuffs and stuck out their tongues at Mewtwo and Voldemort.
Cleffa was driven crazy in a matter of seconds, and Voldemort had to call it back before it would try to kill itself to spare the horror.
"What do we do?" Lord Voldemort whined to Mewtwo.
"We'll have to fight fire with fire!" Mewtwo shot back. He pulled out his guitar and cackled evilly.
"Okay!"
"Here we go!!" Mewtwo began to strum the guitar, much to everyone's surprise. "OOOOOOOOO... OH my gosh I have a CAARR..."
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!" Voldemort sung horribly off-key.
"And ON that car I have a... SUPER BIG FRIGGIN' SHOTGUN!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"With a BAM-BAM here, and a COWPOOM there!"
"Here some gunpowder, and there some Firestone tires, here a BOOM! There a BLAT! Everywhere COWPOOM!"
"OOOHHH my gosh I have a CCAARR!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"ARRGGHH!!! That song is irritating!" Taz yelled. "Even my earmuffs can't block those notes!!!"
"It is driving me mad!!" The Gyarados whined.
"Ungah..." Keeli fell to the floor as if she were being tortured by super sonic sound.
"Let's torture them some more!" Mewtwo crowed. "And ON that car I had a... COLLECTION OF CRUEL STICKERS!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!"
"With a 'BEEP BEEP MY @$$' here and a 'Normal people worry me' there!"
"Here a 'Tell you kids to stop pointing at me' There a 'You say psycho like it's a bad thing' everywhere a 'I SEE DUMB PEOPLE!!!'"
"OOOHHH my gosh I have a CARRRR!!!"
"EEE-III-EEE-III-OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!" Voldemort finished.
"AAAAHHH!!! LET'S GET OUTTA HERE!!!!" Team Rocket whined. They turned tail and ran, crashing through the wall on the right. "Team Rocket's blasting off again!"
"What's this?" Mewtwo crowed. "You idiots exited STAGE LEFT!!!!! GWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!"
"Sayonara, SUCKERS!!" Voldemort whooped. "HOOOHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"
"Well, I guess it's back to waiting..." Mewtwo sighed.
"I think NOT!" Voldemort said. As he said this, a Lugia crashed into the gym. It flew with magnificent grace and landed in front of the two of them. Off stepped a silver-haired man, strangely dressed in shades of dark purple and platinum.
The platinum-haired youth spoke. "Am I too late for a gym challenge? Hello, you two," he took a swift bow. "I am Kuja."
That's it for episode 2! Next up!: Episode 3: IT'S KUJA!!!!
KUJA??!! Yeah. That's him all right, and he wished to join the duo after his Lugia single-handedly defeats all of their pokémon. But his welcome doesn't last long, as Kuja's younger brother has joined Team Rocket and wants THEM!!! Will they survive?!! All this and a bag of chips await you in the next episode of "The 'Normal' Life of Mewtwo"!!!