Vagrant Story Picture Show - Scene One
(Music starts, and two large FMV lips appear onscreen and begin to sing.)
Müllenkamp:
Dark knight Garland was fun
In Final Fantasy one
Though he swore he'd knock us down
Terra Branford was there
With her green-colored hair
To fight FF6's clown
And then something went down
In Cloud Strife's hometown
And Sephiroth walked through the flame
Squall found his mate
In Final Fantasy Eight
They were the only ones you could rename!
(Lips freeze as the credits begin, and read as follows:)
Vagrant Story Picture Show
Starring
ASHLEY RIOT (a riskbreaker)
CALLO MERLOSE (an inquisitor)
SYDNEY LOSSTAROT (a freaky cult leader)
JOHN HARDIN (a lackey)
ROMEO GUILDENSTERN (a knight)
SAMANTHA (a pawn)
TIEGER (a general)
NEESA (another general)
JAN ROSENCRANTZ (a fruity loser)
DUKE BARDORBA (an old dude)
Chorus:
Bad fanfiction RP-gaming
Solemn stories we'll be shaming
See zombies dancing with Ash and Callo
And Sydney acting really shallow
Oh oh oh oh oh
In this Squaresoft bad fanfiction picture show!
(Credits end and Müllenkamp begins to sing once more.)
Müllenkamp:
I knew Lucca and Robo
Would bring back ol' Crono
With the Trigger that Gaspar gave
But I felt really screwed
When the hero got stewed
By SoM's goblin knaves
Young Ramza and friends
May have died in the end
While Delita ascended the throne
And in FF4
The final boss was a bore
With a plot twist that made us all groan
Like this...
Chorus:
Bad fanfiction RP-gaming
Solemn stories we'll be shaming
See zombies dancing with Ash and Callo
And Sydney acting really shallow
Oh oh oh oh oh
In this Squaresoft bad fanfiction picture show!
Don't wanna know
Oh oh oh
What caused the Squaresoft bad fanfiction picture show!
It's gonna blow
Oh oh oh
It's the Squaresoft bad fanfiction picture show!
Please make it go
Oh oh oh
Stop the Squaresoft bad fanfiction picture show!
4:27 AM - Outside Duke Bardorba's Manor
(The camera pans down over the manor, which is burning. Dozens of people, Ashley and Callo among them, are lined up, passing buckets of water down the lines from the wells to douse the blaze.)
Callo: So you say Sydney crashed through a window on the upper stories to get away?
Ashley: Aye, he did. They've found no trace of his body on the ground below, nor any of his followers. It seems the Crimson Blades have all vanished as well, and I suspect Guildenstern has taken them to Leá Monde in pursuit.
Callo: Hmm... For any other, I would say it was impossible, but for Sydney? We've been unable as of yet to determine the limits of his strange powers. It may well be possible for him to have escaped to Leá Monde unharmed.
Ashley: True. If he was able to summon a wyvern...
Callo: A wyvern!?
(In her surprise, she misses the bucket of water being passed to her, and it spills all over the ground.)
Ashley: Pay attention to what you're doing.
Callo: I apologize... So what shall we do now?
(music starts)
Ashley: ...Inquisitor.
Callo: Yes, Agent Riot?
Ashley: I have something to say.
Callo: Yes...?
Ashley: (sarcastic) I really love the... clumsy way... you dropped the bucket... for the third time today.
Callo: (embarrassed) Agent Riot...
(Ashley begins to sing, with the other firefighters as a rather bored-sounding backup.)
Ashley:
As a Riskbreaker, I fly solo (Callo.)
Now to Leá Monde, I must go (Callo.)
Since you're my partner, you should know (Callo.)
I've one thing to say, and that's stay close, Merlose, I doubt you.
There may be a battle where we go (Callo.)
But you and your research, you don't know (Callo.)
How to use swords, nor a crossbow (Callo.)
I've one thing to say, and that's stay close, Merlose, I doubt you.
(Callo begins to look ticked off, as Ashley holds out a dagger, offering it to her.)
Ashley:
Here's a knife to show you I'm not kidding
I'm surprised you know which end to take
(Callo grabs the knife out of his hand angrily, but accidentally pricks herself and drops it.)
Ashley:
So come along but do my bidding
Oh, C-A-L-L-O, make no mistake
(Callo angrily stalks away from Ashley, but he follows.)
Callo:
How dare you say such a thing to me? (Ashley.)
I may be no fighter, but trust me (Ashley.)
We're partners, and must work discreetly (Ashley.)
I've one thing to say, and that's Riot, be quiet, or I'll hurt you.
(She turns back to him, irritated that he keeps following her.)
Callo:
Oh Riot...
Ashley:
Just stay close...
Callo:
Be quiet...
Ashley:
Oh Merlose...
Callo:
Please do.
Ashley:
If you will too.
Callo & Ashley:
There's one thing left to do...
Ashley:
And that's go to the city right pronto (Callo.)
This Losstarot man we must follow (Callo.)
It can't wait till tonight or tomorrow (Callo.)
Now I've one thing to say, and that's stay close, Merlose, I doubt you.
Stay close, Merlose.
Callo:
Riot, be quiet.
Ashley:
Stay close, Merlose.
(The two of them stare at each other dubiously.)
Callo & Ashley:
I doubt you!
