"I'm sure the kid will be fine—" Han was interrupted by a frantic princess.
"Fine? Fine?" Leia exclaimed incredulously. "That is what you said last week! Han, he's lost fifty pounds!" She rolled over in bed to face her husband, the worried expression on her pretty face clear to Han even in the darkness.
"Honey, I think you're—"
But Leia Organa Solo wouldn't let him finish. "Did you see how his clothes were hanging off of him!"
"Sweetheart, you're exaggerating," the smuggler managed to get in, suppressing the urge to place a pillow over his head and doze off into Dreamland. He was worried about the kid too, but he wasn't as young as he used to be, so doing that worrying at late hours was not something that appealed to him.
Leia sighed, forcing herself to take a deep breath,so she wouldn't snap at her husband and use him as an outlet. "Maybe I am..." Seeing the smug look on Han's face, she quickly added, "—a little."
Han opened his mouth to reply, but he was interrupted by the doorchime.
Giving Han a look that plainly said that the discussion wasn't over, Leia slipped out of bed, put on a robe, attempted to flatten her disarrayed hair into some semblance of order, and glided silently over to the door. She was a vision of loveliness and perfection, but when she slapped the door's open button it shattered the graceful image.
A concerned security guard was outside, appearing incredibly nervous at the message he had to relay.
Leia was suddenly alarmed. "What happened?" Security guards didn't call upon someone at midnight without good reason.
Biting his lip, the man answered shakily, although he built up more confidence the more he spoke. "S-sorry to disturb y-you at this late hour, but we had an anonymous call from someone that insisted we check on Jedi Master Skywalker. I sent one of my men inside, and they found him in an alarming state. Heinet immediately sent out a comm call for the paramedics. When they finally got him to the medcenter, he had been that way for approximately one hour."
"What happened?" Leia reiterated. Han appeared silently at her side, a supportive presence in case she chose that moment to faint, which was growing ever more likely.
The man averted his eyes to the floor, and said in a low voice, "It is believed that his condition was caused by a drug overdose, although I haven't talked to the doctors yet, so I'm not entirely sure." The married couple's eyes widened, and he continued, "We've been keeping it under wraps for various reasons. First off, we don't want to undermine the Alliance hero's image, as that might scare off prospective Republic members, and second off, we don't know whether it was a suicide attempt or he was deliberately drugged by someone who intended to murder him. The doctors are surprised that he's lasted as long as he has." Seeing the question in Leia's eyes he answered before she spoke, "I'm sorry we didn't contact you sooner, but it's been hectic, and quite frankly, we haven't had the time."
Han put an arm on his wife's arm, trying to remind her silently not to hyperventilate, something which she was close to doing. "Take me to him!" she ordered. She wanted to see her brother now!
"Calm down, Leia," Han muttered. He was glad that Chewie had persistently argued with him when he'd told the big lug to go to Kashyyyk and visit his family—the Wookiee would be able to keep an eye on the twins and Anakin. He thought about leaving a message, but he dismissed that idea. He could call Chewbacca later. He needed to see his brother-in-law now.
The security guard nodded, "Yes, ma'am."
After what felt like ages to Leia, they finally arrived at the medcenter. The security guard disappeared right after he directed them to the front desk.
Leia insisted on seeing her brother immediately, but the receptionist disagreed, telling them that Luke Skywalker was in a critical condition and could not, under any circumstances, be disturbed.
They were pointed in the direction of the waiting room, and both of them were surprised at the sight in front of them. Mara Jade was peacefully, albeit apprehensively, seated by two downcast Noghri who quickly stood up when they saw the two humans.
Han lifted an eyebrow in surprise, but Leia spoke first, "What are you doing here?"
One of the Noghri replied, "We heard of the son of Vader's condition and came here, although they would not let us in to see him...We feel that we should have been there to protect him."
"Ekhrikhor," Leia gently said, "—you cannot protect us from every unfortunate situation...And you don't have to be here. Luke is in the medical facility's hands now. You two should go get some rest."
"Exactly," Han agreed, pointing a finger at the short but vicious-looking alien.
"But Han clan Solo—"
"Don't you 'but' me!" Han snorted. "Now scram!"
Ekhrikhor mewled softly and reluctantly gestured at the other Noghri to follow. They disappeared silently.
"They're everywhere," Han stated in an amazed tone as he shook his head in mock-fascination, trying to ease the tension. The loyal Noghri did manage to cover a lot of ground...
Leia rolled her eyes at her husband and turned to Mara Jade, who was still sullenly seated. "And you?"
Mara Jade looked the Chief of State in the eye and stated firmly, "I'm here to see your brother."
"Sounds suspicious if you ask me," Han muttered, earning himself a jab in the ribs with Leia's elbow.
Ignoring him, Leia asked, "How did you find out about Luke?"
Mara shrugged, "I have my sources." The look on her face told them to drop the subject unless they both wanted two smoking holes in the middle of their chests.
"Do you know how he's doing?" Han asked quietly.
Mara shook her head. "No. They've been keeping it quiet."
"I guess all we can do is wait."
And wait they did.
But after about forty-five minutes of Han and Mara's gossiping about the fates of various smuggler contacts, Leia couldn't take it anymore. She walked up determinedly to the receptionist, with Han tailing behind warningly. Venomously, she spat in a commanding tone, "Listen here. I am Chief of State Leia Organa Solo, and no matter what you say, we are going to go see my brother."
"But—" the receptionist was cut off.
"Now." Leia looked more intimidating than Han had ever seen her (which was saying something), and apparently the woman behind the counter felt the same way.
Giving them a disapproving glance, the lady typed a few words and pulled something up on her computer screen. She gave them his room number, and Leia swiftly dragged her husband through the halls, Mara Jade striding sleekly behind them.
When they entered Luke's room they saw a 2-1B and a male and female doctor tending to the sick Jedi. The male doctor looked up at their entrance and started. "You're not allowed in here."
"Tough," Han smirked. "We're family."
Mara was about to make a smart-aleck comment aimed at Solo and his ancestors, but she reconsidered. She would probably be thrown out if she said she weren't related. So she opted to seethe silently inside. I'm going to kill you one of these days, Solo...If a bounty hunter or your wife don't get to you first.
"You're still not supposed to be in here," the white-coated man insisted.
Tired of wasting his time, Han brought out his blaster. "Deal with it." Now it was Leia that wanted to murder him.
The doctor's eyes widened, and he nodded frantically. Aggravated, Leia told Han, "Put that thing away before you kill us all!" She turned to the frightened man, "I'm sorry, but my husband gets carried away sometimes. Perhaps you've heard of him? Han Solo," she stated, as if it would explain it all.
And indeed it did. At the mention of the famous rogue's name the doctor understood the situation very well. "You may stay for a few minutes, but we need quiet." He threw a glare at Han, who was about two feet taller than him.
"Thank you," Leia sighed, glad that that was finally over.
During this exchange, Mara had walked over to Luke's side. He was sweating and shivering as he tossed and turned. She took one of his hands and held it in hers silently. She gently rubbed her finger across it and turned her sad gaze onto his face.
The droid spoke to her quietly, "Be careful. He's been vomiting frequently."
Mara just nodded in reply. Luke seemed to calm down in her presence, and his tossing and turnings gradually began to cease.
The 2-1B looked at her in as curious of a manner as a medical robot could pull off. "His fever appears to have dropped a few degrees...Perhaps it would not hurt if you did stay..."
Mara merely nodded her head again, minutely. She couldn't talk right then even if she wanted to.
"What kind of pills were they?" Han asked loudly.
Wincing, as if fearing that the smuggler would strike him, the medic replied, "It was a strange mix of a few variants of spice...as well as—" he coughed, "—aspirin."
"Aspirin," Han repeated non-believingly.
The doctor turned to the less-threatening Leia hesitantly. "It also appears that there is a slight remainder of vodka in his system."
"What?" Han was incredulous. "So basically what you're trying to tell me is that he had a headache and decided to drown it out with an entire container of pills...and a bottle of vodka for good measure?"
"Sounds like something he'd do," Mara quipped quietly from the ill man's side, trying to ease the tension in the room, which was so thick that it could have been cut with a knife.
Leia turned and glared at her, and Mara merely shrugged innocently.
"I'm merely telling you the facts. You can draw the conclusions," the doctor told them.
"Will he live?" Mara brought up the question that the Solos' had dreaded to ask.
"We pumped his stomach and gave him—" the medic was cut off by the rude ex-smuggler.
"Spare us the technical talk and answer the question!" Han jabbed the flustered man in the chest.
The doctor sighed, "There is a good possibility that he will live...But it is too early to tell. Had he not been a Jedi I am sure that he would have been dead long ago."
The statement hung in the air until the female doctor turned to them, "I hate to ask you to do this, but could you please leave?"
Han was about to shoot off his mouth and tell them that no, he couldn't leave, but Leia restrained him. "When can we be back?"
"We'll call you when his condition changes. You should go home and get some rest."
"Fine," Leia pulled her husband outside. She couldn't bare to see Luke's fever flushed face anymore. In her state of worry, she completely forgot that Mara had been in the room with them.
The male doctor ordered, "That goes for you t—"
But the 2-1B interjected, "Sir, his condition improved noticeably when she sat down beside him. Perhaps she should stay."
The exasperated doctor shrugged, "Sure. Why not? It's not like things can get much worse."
"How in space did Luke get his hands on spice...?" Leia inquired skeptically.
"Beats me," Han replied a bit too quickly.
Leia sensed the catch in his voice, and she cautiously dragged out her husband's name: "Han...."
"I don't know!" he declared, his voice a little squeaky. At a disbelieving look from his wife he muttered something incoherent.
"What was that?" she inquired, trying to look her husband in the eye.
"I said 'When you were away'," he repeated.
"Away?" Leia was confused. "Away where?"
"You were on some diplomatic mission to some planet that I wasn't allowed to go to, because they—" he adopted a nagging voice, "—'hate smugglers even more than the Mon Calamari do.'" Leia's facial expression instructed him to continue unless he wanted to sleep aboard the Falcon instead of on the couch.
And so he did. "I was basically bored out of my wits...and Luke looked like he needed a little action as well, so I convinced Chewie to watch the kids and promised not to do anything too dangerous. I inquired around with a few of my contacts and finally found someone who needed some cargo transported from Coruscant to a planet not far from here. It wasn't until we got the stuff aboard the Falcon that we found out what it was. It turned out that some Outer Rim druggies had done some strange mixing and found out that a few variants of spice mixed with aspirin would give you the ultimate high...And if you added a little alcohol it'd give it a much stronger kick. They developed a pill, and if you took one of them you'd be floating on Cloud Nine for days...But more than one could prove fatal. It was outlawed of course, and we had a few run-ins with the authorities..." Seeing his wife's face he added, "—but we didn't kill them, of course! We just...disarmed them. And they weren't Republic ships, they were from a neutral planet."
Han told the rest of his story in a rush, so that Leia couldn't get a word in edgewise. "When we finally got to our meeting spot, we brought a Rodian back to the ship. He examined the cargo, and seemed very displeased that a few bottles were missing, although everything else was unharmed. I didn't think anything of it at the time..." Han trailed off as he gave himself an inward kick.
Leia cleared her throat. Han shook his head to clear it. "But he was happy that we'd gotten it to him safely, so he paid us full price. I used the money to make a few repairs on the Falcon. It took the kid's mind off things for a while, although he eventually returned to his gloomy mood...But you can't blame a fellow for trying..."
"I can...And I will."
Yup. Han certainly wasn't lucky enough to get to sleep on the couch tonight.
Mara gazed down at Luke with a troubled look etched onto her face.
She'd always been so used to pushing people away...It wasn't completely her fault. Her former life as the Emperor's Hand hadn't allowed her to ever really get close to anyone. She hated how she'd had to live back then, but for some reason she still clung to the habits that she had made all those years ago.
It had been hard for her to accept the Jedi Master as a friend, but when it had finally happened she had felt like a load was taken off of her chest. But as the years went by, her feelings for him had begun to run deeper.
And now, because of her stubbornness, she might lose him...Before she could tell him how she felt about him.
And even if he did survive, he'd probably never want to see her again. He had become increasingly frustrated at her constant turning down of his request for her to complete her training, as well as his tentative attempts to get her to have dinner with him and the Solos.
And now it was probably too late.
Her habit of distancing herself from any emotions not linked to anger might have cost Luke his life.
All because of her fear.
She couldn't remember how many times Luke had said that fear was of the Dark Side...And indeed, it felt like the Dark Side had been conspiring against her even on the first day she'd met him in person.
Yes. Unfamiliar feelings had been stirred up within her even on that first day on Myrkr. And it was mostly because of those feelings and her master's teachings that she had rejected, from the beginning, all of the kindness he had showed her. Mara was so afraid of being hurt that she hadn't considered that holding herself back just served to put her through more pain and even served to make Luke go through it, too.
Admitting her real feelings was something that Mara Jade had never done. At least, admitting her true, non-aggressive feelings.
She knew that he felt something for her...And she knew that she felt something for him.
But she still remained afraid of commitment. It was one thing for her to commit to her business, because there was no way she could be hurt. Sure, she could be shot down by an angry employee, or she might get annoyed at a dishonest businessman, but they didn't have the power to rip a jagged hole in her heart if things went wrong.
The idea of being hurt by a relationship frightened her greatly. Her dark past hinted that that was exactly the thing that would happen if she got too close to someone. Yet she still yearned for a close relationship with someone without the fear of pain from rejection. But now her chance was gone like a dry leaf...carried away by a merciless wind.
She wanted to let herself love him, but she was so afraid at the thought of losing him entirely. And so she still clung to her dark past, despite Luke's giving her the hope of a bright light that could diminish any troubles.
Luke would have given her everything that he had in an instant. But she had still turned away from him, and now she had to pay for her non-thinking insolence.
She turned and looked down at the unconscious Jedi. And he would pay, too.
Mara knew that this was not just an accidental overdose...And she hated herself for it.
She hated her fear, she hated her past...and she hated her hate.
She felt a lone tear streak down her face, and she wiped it away shakily with a finger. She had to be strong right now...For him.
She took a tissue from the nightstand next to his bed and wiped his mouth gently with it. She set it down, then rested her head on his arm, placing her hand on his belly and lightly tracing circles on it. As she did so, she sent a Force tendril out to reassure his tortured soul. Then she set what little healing powers she had to work.