This chapter is dedicated to my mother who was pregnant with me while my dad was aboard ship during the Cuban missile crisis.

Part 17

Oh my baby, oh my love,
Gone the rainbow, gone the dove,
Your father was my only love,
Johnny's gone for a soldier.
-- traditional, c. 1770s

Dinah still hadn't decided which had been the harder call to make -- telling Alfred or telling Tim. Bruce, Alfred, Jim Gordon, and Dr. Leslie Thompkins all showed up at about the same time. Leslie then whisked Barbara off to her bedroom to give her a quick checkup, which left Dinah in a room with three grieving men who wanted answers she didn't have.

"So you don't know anything about what Dick was doing when he went missing?" Bruce asked harshly.

"I just told you everything the Navy told Barb," Dinah repeated. "He was reported missing and presumed killed in action. Period. That's all we know."

Soon, Leslie walked out of Barbara's bedroom. At the expectant looks from everyone, she sighed. "Barbara and the baby are in good shape, considering the circumstances. The thing that concerns me right now is making sure she doesn't neglect her health through all this," Leslie's voice wavered and trailed off as she finally allowed herself to think about the "circumstances." She started crying, and Alfred walked over and took her in his arms.

Tim walked in as Barbara rolled out of her bedroom. Dinah could tell he'd been crying, but as soon as he saw Barbara, he rushed over and wrapped her in a fierce hug.

"I'm so sorry, Barbara! I'm so sorry," he repeated over and over. After a few minutes, he stood up and walked tentatively over to where Bruce was standing.

"Bruce? I'm ..." his voice broke. To everyone's amazement (except Alfred's, perhaps), Bruce's face seemed to crumple a bit, and tears fell slowly down his face as well. Dick had always been a link between these two -- and now that link was gone. Tim and Bruce walked over to a corner and talked quietly for a while. Under other circumstances, Dinah would have been extremely interested in listening to a private conversation between Batman and Robin, but right now she couldn't get Bruce's lost-looking expression out of her mind. An expression that was mirrored on Tim's face as well.

Word of Dick's death trickled out, and the clocktower soon saw a barrage of people coming by to offer what comfort they could. The Titans, or at least those currently on Earth, were the next to arrive. Tim had told Victor Stone at S.T.A.R. Labs before he bolted back to Gotham City, so Vic called Jesse at the Tower. He also called Wally West, who showed up with his former teammates.

Dinah wasn't sure whether Wally called Superman or Alfred had, but Clark Kent and Lois Lane arrived right after the Titans. Clark had brought one of his mother's casseroles as well as his parents' condolences. Quite a few other past and present Justice Leaguers came by, either because they knew Dick or because they knew Bruce. Dinah found it almost amusing that most of them didn't know they were also visiting their fellow Leaguer, Oracle. Jim stayed by his daughter's side and left it up to her as to how much he was told about the visitor.

That evening, through the combined efforts of Dinah, Bruce, Alfred, and Jim, Barbara was persuaded to eat some dinner. They then put her to bed with a very mild sedative that Leslie had left.

The next day, the callers continued. As the day wore on, there were fewer friends of Nightwing and more friends of Dick Grayson. Somehow (Dinah suspected Alfred), his Bludhaven friends heard the news because Dick's former sergeant, Amy Rohrbach, and several others from the Bludhaven police department came by, followed by Bridget Clancy, John Law, and Hank Hogan and his family.

Barbara was polite to each visitor and managed to murmur something appropriate, but Dinah knew her friend enough that what she really wanted was to yell at them all to go away and leave her in peace. Each person was a reminder that Dick was gone.

The last batch of visitors probably qualified as the oddest lot, even by Dinah's standards. A slightly stooped man in his late fifties limped in using a cane, followed by a large, middle-aged man with the look of a bodybuilder, an older skinny man with a droopy face, and about ten other very assorted men and women.

For a moment, Barbara looked at the group in puzzlement, until she seemed to recognize the leader. "Mr. Haley?" she questioned.

The old man smiled sadly. "Yes, ma'am. Harry Haley. I ... never could get Dick to call me 'Harry,' even after he bought my circus," he said, his voice breaking. He cleared his throat and continued. "I don't think you've met any of the others, but this is Jacques Carberry," he pointed to the bodybuilder, "and Harry Windrow,"12 pointing to the skinny man, "and some of the others from the circus. Jacques and Harry ... knew Dick even longer than I did. Known him since he was born, actually. We just wanted to tell you how sorry we were to hear that Dick was ... gone. He was a good man and a great flyer."

Harry Windrow spoke up in a tear-filled voice, "I told Elinore about Dick. I think she understood me, 'cause she kinda moaned and wrapped her trunk around my arm."

Seeing their puzzled looks, Haley explained, "Elinore's an elephant who also knew Dick since he was born. Kid used to ride her in the opening parades. Even after more than ten years, she still remembered him when Dick came back and bought the circus. She's a grand old gal."

Barbara bit her lip and then burst out, "Mr. Haley, could you do something for me?"

"Certainly, ma'am. Anything I can."

"When my little girl is ... old enough," she said, forcing her voice through the tears that had started, "I want you to make sure she learns the trapeze just like Dick ... did. I want her to know that part of her father."

Tears slid down Haley's face as he and the others silently nodded agreement. After a few more minutes, the circus group filed out. Barbara wheeled off to her bedroom and shut the door.

~~~~~~~~~~

The late-afternoon sun shone weakly through the windows of the clocktower. The service flag in one of the windows now had a gold star laid over the blue one, courtesy of Alfred. Dinah and Jim sat in the darkening room watching a silent, unmoving Barbara. Once in a while, Barbara would clutch at one of Dick's last letters that she carried around in her jacket, but that was the only movement the watchers saw. The room was so quiet they could hear the bell being rung by the Salvation Army's kettle tender across the street.

"Barbara! There's something you need to see!" called out Tim from Oracle's workroom. Earlier, he had decided the best way to help was by keeping Oracle online. He came dashing into the room and handed Barbara one of her laptops.

"You got an email from Dick! It was pretty heavily encrypted, but I decoded it. He must have sent it through one of their system back doors instead of the regular military email servers. It was on a time-delay -- he'd instructed the Chaffee's computer to send it unless he got back and countermanded the command." Tim suddenly seemed to realize he was babbling and shut up.

Barbara opened up the email as if it might bite. As she read, a bit of light seemed to come back into her eyes. She looked up at her father and friends and said, "He might still be alive!" She routed the email to her big-screen TV so they could see.

Dear Babs,

I'm hoping you don't see this, but I've got a bad feeling about this mission. The idea itself is a good one, but I'm suspicious about the two officers in charge. Essentially, I'm ferrying some marines to the Ch'ton home world. I'm just the driver -- they don't want some navy flyer horning in on their mission, and I certainly don't intend to. At least not where they can catch me anyway! ;-)

If you've received this email, the operation has gone south, just as I expected. I want you to contact Vic and ask him to gather a team to take over the mission. I'm attaching our original mission profile as well as my proposed Titans profile. In it, I've told Vic, and I want to tell you, this is *not* to be a rescue mission. I can't even say whether I'm alive or not, although I'll certainly try my best to keep on breathing, but the main goal of the Titans should be to carry out this mission, since I believe it could effect a quick end to this war.

The second thing I would ask you, sweetheart, is if it's possible, that Bruce *not* be informed of my whereabouts or the Titans' mission. You and I both know Bruce would try to take over, and Vic doesn't need that kind of pressure. The Titans are perfectly capable of managing this on their own, and this really isn't Bruce's kind of fight anyway. If he's reading this with you right now, or he starts giving you trouble, there's a letter for him in my personal effects that I hope he will listen to.

Don't worry, sweetheart -- there's a letter for you too. And one for our baby girl. I will make every effort to come back to you, Barbara, but just in case I can't, know that I've loved you from the first moment I saw you, and that I still count myself blessed to have known you and known your love.

Take care, my darling wife. Tell my daughter I love her.

Love always,

Dick

~~~~~~~~~~

"They were going to kidnap the Ch'ton Queen?!?" exclaimed Dinah as she looked at the paper in front of her. Barbara had decided it would be easier for everyone to see what Dick had sent if she printed out copies of everything. Jim had been drafted into collating all the stacks of paper together for them to take to the Titans Tower where Vic had agreed to meet them.

"Yep. I can see why he'd want to continue the mission, though," Barbara mused. "If the behavior of the colonies is any indication, the Ch'ton can't afford to risk their queen."

Dinah was amazed at the rapid change that Dick's email had caused in Barbara's demeanor. It was still possible, even probable, that Dick was dead, but now she had something to do, something to work on.

Barbara frowned. "Mueller, Mueller, where have I seen that name before?" She tapped a pencil against her forehead in annoyance. Suddenly, all the color left her face, and Dinah was afraid she was going to faint.

"What is it, Barb?"

"I remember where I've seen Samuel Mueller's name -- it was in some of those files of Luthor's that I went through trying to find a smoking gun for the Barracuda upgrade scam. Luthor owns that man!"

Jim just looked puzzled, while Dinah felt a cold knot forming in her stomach.

"Oh my God!" Dinah whispered. "You've got Luthor's stooge showing up on a ship which 'just happens' to have the officer responsible for Luthor's losing an incredibly lucrative government contract. That officer 'just happens' to end up on the stooge's mission which is then lost."

"That's what it looks like to me," replied Barbara quietly.

"Wait a minute!" Jim exclaimed. "Ladies, I'm certainly not one of Lex Luthor's biggest fans, but surely even he wouldn't kill thirteen marines just to get one man!"

"Luthor would," said Barbara positively. Dinah nodded.

"Okay, but then how could he do it? It's one thing to put a staff puke like this Marchant in charge, it's another to assume that he'll get everyone killed, including the pilot. Also, according to these notes, Dick volunteered."

"I dunno, Dad. Maybe, Mueller would've requested Dick if he hadn't already volunteered. This whole thing just feels weird."

Dinah had a flash of inspiration. "Why don't you turn this over to Bruce?" she asked. "Let him focus on the domestic side of things, while the Titans take care of the Ch'ton side."

"Yeah," chimed in Tim, who had walked in earlier with the last of the printouts. "It would give him something to do, and he might be able to find a connection we can't."

Barbara considered the idea. "Are we sure we want to let Bruce think Dick might have been murdered?" she asked gently. "Tim, you remember how he was after Jason died. How do you think he'll act if he finds out Luthor ... killed Dick?"

"How will he feel if he finds out we've withheld information about his son's death?" countered Tim. "I think Bruce is our best bet right now."

"All right," conceded Barbara. "Why don't you present it to him as your having found the Navy's files on the mission, and you cross-referenced Mueller with my files." She stopped speaking as an idea struck her. "Tim? Did I ever show you those coded files of Luthor's I hadn't been able to figure out?"

"No, I don't think so," replied Tim, puzzled.

"I've got them filed under that whole Barracuda scam. Pull them out and take a look, would you? Maybe a fresh pair of eyes might find something."

"Sure thing, Babs."

Dinah saw Barbara wince slightly at the nickname. Dick, and thus Tim who learned it from Dick, were the only ones Dinah knew who called her "Babs." No matter how slim the chances might be, Dinah couldn't help hoping that Dick would be back to call her that sometime soon.

~~~~~~~~~~

"They were going to kidnap the Ch'ton Queen?!?" exclaimed Vic in astonishment.

Dinah snickered at his echo of her earlier statement. She and Barbara had driven from Gotham to the Titans Tower in New York City. As much as the two women had been involved with the team over the years -- Barbara with Dick, Dinah as a kind of big sister/foster mother to Roy Harper -- neither had ever been on the island before. They had known the huge "T" that stood on the island was only a hologram now, but it certainly looked solid. Vic met them as their skiff docked and led them into the complex. The three of them were soon sitting around a table in the Titans' library while Barbara explained about Dick's email and showed him the information Dick had sent her.

"Ohhh-kay. Yeah. He want to use a slight variation on scenario HR-704b -- makes sense," Vic muttered as he looked through the papers.

"I saw that -- what's he mean?" Dinah asked.

Vic looked up. "Oh, sorry. That's Hostage Rescue 704b. The '7' refers to the number of team members, and the '04b' refers to that particular seven-member hostage rescue scenario. The particular variation he wants is for me to include Raven in the team."

"But this isn't a hostage rescue," Dinah pointed out.

"704b is designed for a ... reluctant hostage. Basically, we go in and assume the person doesn't want to be rescued, whether because of mind control, drugs, whatever. We never really talked about it, but I think we all realized it could also work as a kidnapping scenario."

"That makes sense," Barbara said briskly. "Who are the other members supposed to be?"

"Me, Flash, Argent, Troia, Tempest, Arsenal, and of course, Dick," Vic replied. "That's one reason for Raven to be on the team -- once we're on site, she can find Dick and pull him out. Dick says this isn't solely a rescue op, but he's also not denying himself an opportunity to survive."

"So you think you can do this?" Barbara asked the deciding question, a slightly pleading tone entering her voice.

Vic looked at her steadily. "We not only can do this, we are going to do this. One way or another, we're bringing Dick home."

** End Part 17 **

__________
12 The New Titans #60 mentions a weightlifter named Jacques and a clown named Harry (who's also in Batman #436). They aren't given last names. Nightwing Secret Files #1 lists a weightlifter named Irving Carberry and a clown named Sammy Windrow. I split the difference and gave Jacques and Harry the others' last names.