Well, I'm writing this in protest to one of my friend's fanfics, in which during a game of Strip Truth or Dare (Don't ask, the guys were drunk!) Trowa is asked if he would screw Rali (her character), to which he replied that he would…I DO NOT THINK SO – My Trowa would never say that. So this is what would really happen if they all got drunk…
(In this fanfic, no-one is married)
There was a big thump on the door, Duo was trying to open the door but in his drunken stupor he couldn't work out which way up the key went. As Duo was fumbling with the keys, Rali and Kaliah were giggling and shushing each other, Quatre had a humongous grin on his face, Heero and Wufei were singing Christmas carols (in the middle of summer I might add!), and Trowa was wrestling with a thorn bush which he drunkenly believed was trying to attack Malia (How and why…no-one knows!) "I fink I gos sa door sopen" Duo slurred. As they all bundled for the door, they landed on the floor with a thud, all of them that is except for Trowa who had now managed to tangle himself up in the thorn bush, Malia had ended up falling into the bush as well whilst trying to help Trowa out. Quatre and Wufei realised that Trowa and Malia weren't there they went outside to help them. Once they finally got out they crawled into the lounge where the others were flopped on the couch, Duo had found a bottle of Baileys in the kitchen and was now pouring it into glasses for everyone. Trowa had now slightly sobered up from the pain of the scratches all over him from the thorn bush. "Owww…help" Malia walked back into the room with a bottle of calamine lotion, "Ssss sis might help"
"Can't move, hurts…you do it"
"It's snot my fault sat you got scra…scra…tched" Malia sat down next to him, handing Trowa the bottle. Trowa refused to take it and started grinning like a little kid; he pushed the bottle back into Malia's hands. "Can't move, hurts…you do it" Trowa repeated looking down at his torn shirt. "Why sss…ssss…should I?" Malia asked trying to give Trowa the bottle. But Trowa still refused to take it, "You do it, youu…nice…like you" Duo handed each of them a glass of Baileys.
"Malia…fix him" said Quatre before he downed the entire glass of Baileys he'd been given. "Yeah, go on…" everyone started agreeing with Trowa. Malia rolled her eyes and helped Trowa undo the buttons of his ripped-up black shirt, "…I won" he said trying to cuddle Malia. "Get off you sss…stupid…stupid person"
It took about twenty-five minutes to finally sort Trowa out, during this time they all had to endure Trowa and Quatre doing a unique rendition of My Heart Will Go On. (It would be bad enough if Celine Dion was singing it, but two drunken boys!!)
"Soooo swot we gonna do now?" Asked Kaliah, sprawled out on the floor. A few idea's came up, but none of them were very good (i.e. strip musical chairs!)
"I sno, let's play s…strip poker" Duo's idea seemed like a good one;
"We don't got sno cards tho" Rali pointed out,
"How bout strip spin the bottle?" Suggested Heero, they all agreed on this game and sat down in a circle on the floor, using the Baileys bottle they had just polished off for it. "Sos who'ss gonna go firssst?" Wufei questioned, sitting directly opposite Kaliah.
Duo ended up volunteering, he spun the bottle – and it landed on Wufei! "Does dis mean I hafta kiss Wufei?"
"Yep, you don't hafta kisss him on the lips tho. You could just kisss him on the cheek" Duo grudgingly kissed Wufei on the cheek, and the fell about laughing.
"Ya'know, you could've taken off a piece of clothing Duo!" Malia said staring at the ceiling. "You're kidding?"
"Nope, she's right! Your turn Wufei!" Said Kaliah giggling. He grumbled, then spun the bottle, it landed on Rali. He crawled over and kissed her, then sat back down. Rali span the bottle, it landed on Heero. His eyes lit up, they kissed. "Dis could take a while!" said Quatre laughing. About five minutes later they sat back down and it was Heero's turn. It landed on Malia, who he quickly kissed and then fell down in a sleepy heap. I want the bottle to land on me, then she'll have to kiss me thought Trowa as he watched the bottle spin, he had to stop looking at it though, as all that spinning was making him dizzy.
The bottle finally came to a stop, pointing straight at Trowa. Yesss! Malia looked over at Trowa who was trying to scratch at the cuts from the thorns. She crawled over to Trowa and pinned his hands on the floor to keep him from making the cuts worse, "Don't scra...scra…atch, it'll make them worse" she said as she moved her face closer to his. "Okay, I'll ss…stop…as long as you kiss me on the lips!" He's up to something, oh well; I'll just get on with kissing him. Malia kissed Trowa quickly on the lips and went to pull away, but Trowa had put his hand on the back of her neck and started kissing her back hard before she could hit him, he put his other hand over her wrist to keep her still (and also cuz she could punch him!). Rali and Kaliah started singing "Trowa and Malia, sittin ina tree…" and Duo, Quatre, Wufei, and Heero were hooting and cheering. Trowa still didn't let go of her, falling on top of her on the floor, Malia wasn't paying attention to the others either, she was too busy concentrating on getting Trowa off her. Trowa's a really good kisser; maybe I shouldn't be in such a rush to get him off me.
"Hey, ss…should we carry on without those two?" Quatre asked grinning at the pair of them. "No, we'd better ss ss…separate them."
"Aw, but you guys they look so cute. And he's been wanting to do that for a while"
As Duo and Wufei pulled Trowa off of Malia, Trowa gave them a glare, then started looking sorry for himself "I wassn't finished"
"We know that, but we want to play anover game now" Said Wufei watching as Quatre helped Malia up off of the floor.
"Let'ss play strip tooth or dare" Said Duo trying to get any last drop of drink out of the Baileys bottle. "Don't you ss…mean strip truth or dare?" Rali questioned him, grinning at Heero. "Sats what I said tooth or dare!" No-one at this point could be bothered to argue with Duo as it would go on for hours! "SS…So, who's gonna go firsst?" Asked Rali with a dazed expression on her face. Duo shrugged before answering, "Dunno, Quatre…you go firsst cuz…CUZ!" Quatre looked around for someone to ask, "Heero, truth or dare?" Heero thought about it for a second.
"Dare"
"Go run down the ss…street naked!"
"Change my mind, truth!" Heero said quickly as he took off his shoes,
"Pathetic, you have to take off an item of clothing and you choose ss…ss…shoes!" Rali said still looking kinda dazed. "Okay, Heero…what do you really think of Rali's jokes?" Heero looked around worried, no one was giving him any support here.
"Well, they're…um…in…inter…essting?"
"You're turn to asssk ss…ssomeone…ss…something" Heero looked straight at Trowa who was staring in Malia's dreamily. I'm gonna kiss her again, no matter what. "SS…So Trowa, truth or dare?" Trowa looked over to Heero, whilst pulling silly faces at Duo and Quatre. "Truth" Heero looked at Malia before asking. "Right, what girl in this room would you like to ss…screw and why?" Not a hard question to answer really, my answer would be Malia because I 'like' her!
Trowa walked over to where Malia was sitting looking up at the walls, "Which girl in sis room would I like to ss…screw and why? The girl I'd like to ss...screw in this room would be Malia, and I'd like to because I want to and am going to do that right now, bye!" As Trowa finished speaking he picked Malia up and ran off with her.
"Get off you bastard!" Malia shouted, kicking and screaming as Trowa ran into his room with her giggling, before closing the door. "Well, das that den. What ss…should we do now?" Said Duo,
"We ss…should go ss…save Malia. SS…She didn't look very happy when Trowa grabbed her." Quatre stood up and walked to Trowa's door, kicking it open, before Malia ran out giggling and Trowa ran off after her. "Hey, come back Malia…pleez?"
After about half an hour, Trowa finally stopped chasing Malia round the house and sat back down to play strip truth or dare. Trowa looked over to Malia and asked her "Malia…truth or dare?" she looked up from a magazine.
"Dare"
"SS…Stay in my bedroom with me for the night" Trowa winked as he said it.
"In that case, can I have a truth pleez?"
"Okay then, take off an item off clothing firsst – I think you ss…should take off your ss…shirt." Malia took off her shirt, but it didn't really bother her as she had a vest top on underneath. Trowa looked disappointed when he saw that she had a top on under her shirt. "Your truth iss…are you a virgin?" There was a silence, Malia shifted uncomfortably, blushing slightly. "Well Malia, come on, are you a virgin or not, it'ss a ss…simple yess or no question." Malia looked at him sharply before standing up, bastard. "YES I AM, OKAY" She ran off down the hallway. Trowa looked around at the girls, who didn't look too pleased at him. He stood up and ran after her, "Juss go on wivout uss"
Malia stopped at the end of the corridor, ran into her room and threw herself onto her bed sobbing. Trowa knew exactly where she was; he quietly tiptoed towards her door. "Malia?" He whispered, unsure whether to come into the room or not.
"Go away" said a mumbled voice under a pillow. He stepped in and closed the door.
"I'm not going Malia. I upset you, I'm…" Before he could finish he was interrupted,
"Ya'know what, I don't wanna hear it…just go" But he didn't, Trowa walked into Malia's room, pulled the pillow off her head and pulled Malia up into his arms and cradled her, kissing the back of her neck and stroking her hair. "Malia, I'm ss…sorry. I ss…shouldn't have asked that…anything I did tonight that's upset you I'm ss…sorry and I'm gonna make it up to you." Malia sighed and relaxed in Trowa's arms a little. "Come on, please?" He said, watching Malia's eyes close slowly, whilst tears still ran down her face. I really upset her; I didn't mean to make her upset. "…Juss…go…" said the curled up bundle he was holding in his arms, he still didn't leave. He really won't listen, why won't he just go? "I'm not going…deal with it" As Trowa spoke, Malia opened her eyes and looked up at him. "Why won't you go?" Trowa looked into Malia's eyes and kissed her again on the cheek before answering "Doessn't matter now…sssshh". He picked Malia up and put her down in her bed, pulling her duvet over her to keep her warm. He turned round and went to walk out of the door, "Trowa…ss…stay?" She tried to get up out of bed but couldn't, and instead fell out of bed onto the floor. "Owww…hurt" She wants me to stay, I hope she isn't joking. He thought as he lifted Malia back up into his arms and laid her on the bed. "Goodnight Malia"
"Stay" pleaded Malia with a sweet smile on her face "Pleeze?" He sighed and sat down on the edge of her bed. "You ss…sure?" Malia looks so cute
"SS…Stay…I mean it" Trowa moved over to where Malia was lying in bed, sat her up and moved behind her so he could cuddle her better. "Do you want me to ss…stay like this?"
"Yep, and you have to now!" Malia slid down into his arms and laid her head on Trowa's chest. Trowa smiled, something he very rarely did, I have wanted to do this for what feels like forever. He stroked Malia's hair out of her face, before kissing her gently near her lips, Malia stopped Trowa "What are you doing?"
"Kissing you" he murmured before going back to kissing her,
"But why…" Trowa stopped Malia mid-question, he put his finger over her lips to silence her, smiled again and started kissing her. Malia pushed Trowa off, "Why?"
"Doesn't matter now, be quiet" He went back to kissing her again. Quatre was standing at the door to Malia's bedroom, smiling. Trowa finally got his wish…better give them some privacy.
"SS…So, you gonna get undressssed before you fall asleep, or don't you trusst me?"
He asked, grinning and playing with Malia's hair. "Why? You wan me to sstrip?" Malia replied as she cuddled up to Trowa, pulling his arms around her closer. "Well, if you're offering to ss…strip for me, then…" Malia put her index finger over Trowa's mouth, before kissing him back and getting up out of her bed "I want a drink" Trowa pulled Malia onto the bed and pinned her down. "You aren't having anymore alcohol and…" he laid Malia down on the bed and rested his head on her's.
"And what Trowa?"
"I love you Malia"
"I love you too Trowa. I feel sleepy" Malia closed her eyes as she spoke. Okay, I could stay like this forever, Trowa's perfect. "Go to sleep Malia. I'm not going anywhere. But I'm going to have to take your clothes off for you!"
"Fine by me, night Trowa" she moved closer to him and kissed him gently on the lips.
"Goodnight Malia" This is going to be a great night, now how do I help her undress without making it seem like a come-on? "I thought you were gonna help me Trowa?"
Trowa wasn't really listening, as he was still thinking. "Oh yeah, I was going to help you out. You sure you want me to?" Malia opened her eyes again, looking up at Trowa. "Of course I do, if you're not going to then…"
"I just wanted to check that you were sure"
"I'm sure Trowa, come on" Trowa obliged and helped her take off her vest top, throwing it on the floor and undoing her zip on her skirt, throwing that on the floor too. He went to take off her bra and underwear, but Malia stopped him. "Don't strip me that much!" She helped him undress, leaving him in a black pair of boxers, and they got into bed, cuddling up and kissing. They looked cosy together. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her neck again smiling as she sighed happily. "Trowa?"
"Yes, what? Did I do something wrong?" Malia looked at Trowa's worried face, bring her hand closer to his face before pulling him over and kissing. "No, nothing's wrong. I just wanted to know something"
"What do you want to know?"
"What your answer would be to the question you asked earlier"
"Oh, you mean, am I a…Yes, I am. Surprised?" He blushed slightly; he wasn't usually so open with anyone about things like this. "I'm not surprised, but I didn't expect it either. I just wanted to know" He slid lower into bed with Malia, cuddling her so close she almost couldn't breathe. "Trowa…you're suffocating me" Malia managed to choke out, Trowa loosened his grip a little, stroking Malia's black hair out of her face. "Sorry, I was just worried…never mind, it's stupid"
"No, tell me"
"I was worried that this was all a dream, that if I let you go you'd disappear and wake up" Malia laughed, settling her head on Trowa's muscular chest, closing her eyes.
"Well, this isn't a dream. We ss…should go to sleep, good night"
"Sweet dreams Malia" He kissed her on the forehead and closed his eyes too, falling to sleep quickly.
An hour passed, Malia woke up abruptly shaking. Trowa woke up and sat up holding her, "What's wrong?" She rested her head on Trowa's shoulder, still shaking.
"Nightmare…" Trowa made her lie back down and moved over, massaging Malia's shoulders to try and calm her shaking. She still couldn't sleep, and turned round to go back to kissing Trowa. He pulled away momentarily, "You need to go back to sleep Malia…" but stopped speaking What am I saying? If she stays awake then we can kiss and cuddle till it's time to get up. He pulled her into his arms and started kissing her, sliding his hands up and down her back. Malia grinned, suddenly forgetting her bad dream. She pushed him off and began kissing his neck, tickling Trowa to make him laugh. "Stop it! You know I'm ticklish Malia" He went back to kissing her, burying his face in the curve of her neck. She giggled a little and he looked at her.
"Your hair is tickling me," she said, pushing his long auburn bangs away from his forehead. "You're ticklish, hmm," he said, a hint of wickedness in his voice, as he moved his hands teasingly over her waist and wiggled his fingers a little.
"No, please," she said, laughing and squirming.
"Well, since you said please nicely," he answered, covering her lips with his again.
It was some time later, Trowa and Malia were still kissing each other. In the lounge, Quatre finally decided to tell the guys the good news "You know I came in here smiling? Do you guys want to know why I was smiling?" Rali, Kaliah, and Duo looked at Quatre. "Yeah, we remember you coming in smiling, why were you smiling? And where have Malia and Trowa got to?" Rali asked going through a pile of CD's on the floor. "At the moment, they're making up"
"So, they had a fight, now they're making up, big deal Quatre" said Kaliah who was hugging Duo. "No, you don't understand, I meant making up in the way that Heero and Rali make up. I think they might have finally got together" Wufei sat up abruptly,
"Do you know for certain? What proof have you got?" Quatre stood up grinning.
"Come with me, and I'll show you the proof. Hurry up!" Duo, Heero, Wufei, Rali and Kaliah stood up and followed Quatre to the end of the corridor. They peeked in through the door, Heero whispered to the others "That is actually kinda sweet" Duo smiled as he saw Trowa and Malia kissing and cuddling. "Finally, I thought those two were never gonna get together!" They crept off back to the lounge and flopped back down on the sofa. "It's so great that those two are together now, Malia's liked Trowa for ages" Rali said whilst ruffling Heero's hair. Heero looked kinda angry when Rali did that. "I know, Trowa told me he liked her a while back, and Malia told me the same thing!" Quatre reached for the packet of aspirin on the table as he spoke.
"So why didn't you set them up together?" Kaliah asked as she glanced over at Wufei.
"Easy, because I knew it would be better if they got together without help. You guys, it's four in the morning, we should go to sleep." They all agreed that it was a good idea and crawled off to bed.
Trowa watched as Malia fell back to sleep, he closed his eyes and relaxed. He was starting to sober up now and had the beginnings of a very bad hangover. He groaned at the pain in his head, accidentally waking Malia up. "You okay Trowa?" She asked, stroking Trowa's hair gently out of his eyes. "Hangover…sorry, did I wake you?" She nodded in answer to his question, getting up and walking out of the room. Trowa sat up and looked at her. "Where are you going?"
"To get you some aspirin…I'll be back in a minute," She said as she disappeared down the hallway. She rummaged through the cupboard in the kitchen, trying to make as little noise as possible. Quatre and Duo had walked into the kitchen to make some coffee, yawning and moaning at the painful headaches they had. "Morning Malia, how's Trowa?" she looked up, seeing the dark circles under the hung-over boys eyes.
"Trowa's fine, I'm getting him an aspirin – you two should take a couple as well, not meaning to be rude…but you look awful!" She passed the boys a couple of aspirin from the packet, before taking out a few for Trowa and herself and standing up.
"Thanks Malia, I feel worse than I look, believe me! So, are you and Trowa…you know…together?" Quatre asked as he got a glass of water and took the painkillers quickly with just one gulp of water. "I'm not sure Quatre, I mean…we've been kissing and stuff but we aren't going out" Duo chucked the painkillers down his throat before adding, "But, you'd like to go out with him right?" Malia blushed before answering, "Yes, I would like to…but he'd have to be an idiot to wanna ask me out"
"Well then…I believe that makes me an idiot Malia!" She turned round to face Trowa, who was standing in the doorway to the kitchen in a black unbuttoned shirt. "Trowa…huh? What the…?" Trowa walked over to Malia, pulling her into his arms and kissing her. Duo wolf-whistled as he watched them kiss, Quatre smiled at the sight. As they stopped kissing Trowa whispered quite loudly in her ear. "So Malia, do you want to be my girlfriend?" Malia looked up at the half-asleep Trowa, who was staring at her intently. "Yes, I'd love to be your girlfriend Trowa" Heero, Kaliah, Wufei, and Rali had just come into the kitchen having seen the events that had just happened. They all sat around the table in the kitchen nursing their hangovers, Rali was sitting next to Heero with her head resting on his shoulder. It was amazing; he was smiling at Trowa and Malia. They hadn't noticed though, they were too busy holding hands and gazing into each other's eyes. "Aw…those two are so cute!" Kaliah said as she sipped her strong black coffee. "Hmph! I think it's disgusting" Wufei grumbled watching Trowa and Malia kissing. Rali and Kaliah glared at Wufei, he glared back before going back to staring at the clock, it was nine-thirty in the morning – they'd had five hours sleep at the most. "Trowa…Malia, get a room!" Heero joked as he tucked Rali's hair behind her ear. "Fine by me, see you later!" Trowa remarked as he picked Malia up and carried her off back to bed. "Ya'know they're probably gonna do it…" Duo said whilst trying to sort out his hair.
"Thanks for stating the obvious Duo, but we already realised that!"
"ACTUALLY WE'RE GONNA GO BACK TO SLEEP, SO YOU'RE WRONG AGAIN GUYS!" Trowa's voice shouted, echoing through the hallway into the kitchen. Everyone winced as the shouting hurt their heads (Which was really their own fault for drinking too much!) Heero dragged Rali off to the lounge where they ended up falling asleep on the couch. Duo came in and placed a blanket over the two of them before walking off back to bed. Wufei got changed and began to train (apparently, only the weak go back to bed with hangovers – I disagree big time. He sneaked back in minutes later, making sure no-one saw him as he skulked off back to his bedroom!)
Three hours passed, it was now twelve-thirty. All was quiet. Well, that was until Duo came flying headlong down the stairs. There was a large crash as he hit the ground with a thump, the picture on the wall had fallen and smashed on the ground with millions of tiny triangles of glass lying on the deep red carpeting. "Oops!" Duo muttered as he picked himself up. He looked down at the broken glass on the floor, sighing and sitting on the bottom step. "Hey! What happened? You okay Duo?" Kaliah said as she stood at the top of the stairs. "Yeah, I'm fine…but the picture isn't"
"How do you manage to do these things Duo?" Quatre asked as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes and started walking down the stairs. "I really don't know Quatre. Mind the glass, you'll cut yourself on it"
"I'll be careful, we'd better clear this up. I wonder if Trowa and Malia are awake yet" Quatre asked himself as him and Duo brushed up the shards of glass.
There was a yawn…then a big groan in pain. Trowa sat up holding his aching head, holding Malia close to him hoping not to wake her. "God, I shouldn't have drunk so much last night, what time is it?" Trowa looked over at his alarm clock. It was twelve forty in the afternoon. Gently shaking Malia awake, he whispered in her ear. "Wake up Malia" She murmured and opened her eyes, looking up at her new boyfriend who was smiling at her. "Morning Trowa" She sat up and rested her back against the wall.
"Technically it's the afternoon Malia!" Trowa remarked as Malia picked up a pillow and hit him with it. "Yeah, but 'Morning Trowa' sounds better than 'Afternoon Trowa'!"
"That's true"
"I'm glad you agree Trowa"
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Well, that's the end…for now – ya never know when I'm gonna decide to add something to my fanfics. So, if you have any questions, comments, insults…etc, send 'em to me at shaws394@thegrid.org.uk