Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Mahou Tsukai Tai!, I am just borrowing them. No profit is being made from this. Or in other words: this is just for fun!

Author's Note: This is a short POV for Aburatsubo. Angst abundance (very angsty), and, of course, this is shounen-ai. If you do not like, please, please do not read.

I Can't
by Anthy

I did not ask for this! Do you think that I wanted to fall in love with you, Takeo? I can't say when I started to have these feelings, but they are there. I tried to deny them, pretend I was normal. . . until the day I met you. I'm not society's definition of normal, am I? All of my dreams where vesseled into your being. Whatever it was about you, there were so many things. I fell deeply in love with you. I thought that we were made for one another. Turns out, I was wrong. I see you stare at her, with your glassy eyes, eyes that never turned that way for me.

I tried, Takeo. I did anything I could think of to make you love me. Each time I tried, I failed. My heart breaks a little each time you run the other direction, or cringe at my touch. I want to give up. I want to be your friend.

I can't.

I see her, standing there. She loves me, I know she does. Every little blush, every smile is meant for me. She's such a sweet girl, why can't I love her the way I love you?

I can't.

It would make life so easy, wouldn't it? Go out with Nanaka, betray my heart, ignore my mind. I tried Takeo. I want to be happy. I want to be in love with someone who loves me in return.

I can't.

Don't sacrifice your happiness, I could never ask you to do that. I want you to be happy above all else. I want to tell Sae to go after you, or to push her in your direction and end this sordid affair. I wish I can say she loves you more. To admit that fact is right.

I can't.

The End