DISCLAIMERS: I own zipola. Leave me alone.
(A/N) Woah, please don't ask me why I wrote that... let's just say that math class can have weird effects on the brain. This is a parody of the Weird Al song "The Night Santa Went Crazy." I'm a big fan of all things Al. Ten House points to anyone who can figure out who's singing this! Flames are welcome, they will help Dumbly barbecue Sinistra.
THE NIGHT ALBUS WENT CRAZY
Down in the classroom
all the kids were really bored
Sitting like good little girls
and good little boys
When the Headmaster busted in
nearly scared 'em half to death
Had a wand in his hand
and cheap whiskey on his breath
From his beard to his boots
he was covered with ammo
Like a big old drunk, disgruntled, wizard Rambo
And he smiled as he said,
with that twinkle in his eye
"Merry Christmas to all-
now you're all gonna die!"
The night Albus went crazy
the night Dumbledore went insane
Killed his students, like a Death Eater
something finally must have snapped in his brain
Well the castle is gone now
he decided to bomb it
Everywhere you'll find Peeves
throwing pieces of Colin
And he tied up the teachers
and he held them all hostage
And he ground up poor Fawkes into
phoenix sausage!
He got Snape and Trelawney
with an old German Luger
And he slashed up Flitwick
just like Freddie Kruger
And he picked up a flamethrower
and he barbecued Sinistra
And he took a big bite and said
"It tastes just like chicken!"
The night Albus went crazy
the night the Headmaster went nuts
Now you can't hardly walk around Hogwarts
without stepping in somebody's guts
There's the Ministry and Aurors
There's Rita from the Daily Prophet
And broomsticks circling 'round in the sky
The curses are flying, the body count's rising,
And everyone's dying to know oh Albus why?
My my my my my my
You used to be such a jolly guy
Yes Virginia, now the Headmaster's doing time
Off in Azkaban for his infamous crime
Hey little sister, don't you cry no more tears
He'll be out with good behavior in 700 more years
But now Dobby's in therapy
and Winky's still nervous
And the house elves all got jobs
working for the postal service
And they say that McGonagall
she's sending owls every night
To the Ministry negotiating the movie rights
They're talkin' bout- the night Albus went crazy
The night Dumbledore flipped
Broke his back, kicking Voldie's heiney
Sounds to me like he was tired of getting tricked
Wo, the night Albus went crazy
The night Dumbledore went insane
Realized he'd been getting a raw deal
Something finally must have snapped in his brain
Wo, something finally must have
snapped in his brain
Tell ya, something finally must have
snapped... in his brain