~So you believe that having children gives humans a sense of immortality, do you?~
How Vegeta Obtained Immortality.
By the Angel of Death
Disclaimer: Not mine.
A/N: Yet another sad attempt at humour from me! R&R guys! I wanna know if I'm the only one who likes this!
Sometimes Vegeta thought himself to be the dumbest creature in the universe! (Aside from Kakorott, of course!) This was one of those times.
He had just come out of the gravity room to find that woman he lived with crying. For some god awful, out of character reason, he had asked her what was wrong. So impressed had she been that one thing quickly lead to another, as they say. Human males wined about not being able to find mates. He had to laugh at them after mating with that woman. It was so easy. Ask the weaklings questions, wait for the answers and they were yours! Well at least that was how it had happened with this woman. He had been told though, that not all women were like her.
Some were actually quiet!
Well, getting back to why the woman had been crying. She had looked up at him so pitifully and said that her boyfriend (what a dumb term!) had cheated on her again. Then she had said something about something breaking? He wished the woman could use plain English sometimes… Really, was it that hard? He didn't think so and it wasn't even his langue!
So, he had listened to her sob story and promptly told her to stop her complaining and get over the weakling. (And you men can't find mates? Look how easy it was for him! Geez…)
She hadn't glared at him, or hit him, or threatened him, or screamed. Needless to say he was getting a little nervous! She had merely smiled and praised him for his intelligence. (He was beginning to think she had finally gone off the deep end.)
He had snorted and had been about to agree with her on that point when she had kissed him! Kissed the prince! A lowly weakling woman! Well he hadn't been about to stand for that! But as soon as her hands started…. Well never mind what they were doing… he had decided to forget she was such a pathetic life form and allow her ahem! Kiss.
Now having this upset woman in his arms made Vegeta think. His mind started to wonder and he began to think about being immortal. (The prince was not know for his way with the opposite sex…) And eventually, after much of the rust had left the wheels in his mind he had thought of something. Something so wonderfully simple it couldn't fail! (The prince was not informed that this would be a good time to knock on wood. Sadly enough.)
He would simply make the woman unable to leave him, and force her to get the Dragonballs for him! It was so easy! And what better way to make a woman unwilling to leave her mate then with a child! It could work! It would work! It had to work! (Vegeta latter wondered what the hell he had been on at this moment.)
Ahem! So Vegeta and the woman, 'hopped on the good foot and did the bad thing' so the expression goes. (For those who don't know the expression they went at it like two ferrets in a paper bag! Get the picture? Excellent!)
And so the woman ends up pregnant. Time passes, many horrible, horrible months of nothing but mood swings and food cravings passed. Vegeta was starting to wish he had remained dead on Namek! Just when he was about to save himself further pain and suffering, the brat, make that child, was born! It was a great day of rejoicing! For everyone except of course Vegeta. Who was still trying to figure out what the hell was in that damned blue blanket!
Finally the blanket (and child!) was passed to him and he looked down.
The first thought that came to his mind was that the child had the ugliest purple hair in existence! And after the urge to throw the brat out the window had passed Vegeta noticed something else.
He was holding his son!
Now that thought really blew the prince away. He had made life? Nu-uh! Not possible. He took lives, he didn't make them, or so he had thought. He thought back to the reason why the brat had been conceived in the first place.
His wish for immortality.
Looking down at the squirming brat Vegeta finally understood something; he didn't need to wish for immortality. It was staring him in the face!
As soon as he realized that of course he immediately began telling the third class moron how his son would be the greatest fighter in the universe! And would kick the snot out of that freaky, not to mention ugly thing Kakorott consider a son!
The third class moron had only smiled and congratulated Vegeta. The prince had given the brat back to the woman and had proceeded to beat the snot out of the moron. For no other reason then the fact that he could.
~End!~
Lol! I like this one! Come on guys! R&R!
AoD