Barely Breathing pt. 1 of 10
By: Richess a.k.a. A.N.H. Richards
Feedback: I love it. Please send it. richess78@hotmail.com
Disclaimer: All Characters belong to J. Whedon, Mutant Enemy Productions, the W.B. and/or Fox Production and etc, except, Rainne, Raul, N'Sheena, Katherine and Mickey were created by me
Song Barely Breathing, By Duncan Sheik 1996 Atlantic Records
Summary: Riley breaks up with Buffy at the Bronze and Spike witnesses the whole thing. But something the Riley did in the recent past will come back to haunt him. Also someone from Spike past is in town. Set After Listening to Fear (S.5) Spike/Buffy and Buffy/Riley
Author's Notes: All actions have consequences
________________________________________
"You just missed a real nice time.'" Riley said mocking Spike's British accent, while taking another gulp of the beer in front of him. "Why is he always there?"
"Who?" Willie asked then quickly added, "Not that its any of my business, but you and the Slayer, that's ok . . . right?"
"Right." Riley replied sarcastically swigging down the whole bottle of beer in one gulp. Willie quickly handed him another.
"That's your fifth Riley, don't you think . . ." Willie started. But the look that Riley gave him stopped Willie mid-sentence. So Willie let him wallow in his self pity for another night.
Everything was pretty regular until she walked in.
* * *
"Willow, thanks for coming over, you too Tara." Buffy said answering her door. They had all left the hospital about two hours after the doctors said that her mom's surgery went extremely well. Dawn was exhausted, but Buffy wanted to go patrolling and vent off some energy, and she couldn't let The Key' stay by herself.
"No problem Buffy. I'll go check on Dawn." Tara replied, headed up the stairs.
"Buffy are you sure that you want to go patrolling tonight?" Willow asked cautiously.
Buffy looked drained, emotionally and physically.
"I'm fine, Will. I've been trying to call Riley, but he isn't home. Did he say if he going patrolling tonight?"
Willow quickly averted her eyes to her shoes.
"What is it Will?"
"Riley, I think has been feeling kind of, you know, out of the loop. You guys at one point were inseparable and then your mom got sick and he's probably feeling kind of neglected." Willow explained then added, "I am not sure, . . . but that's what I am guessing."
**I've been put through the ringer these last couple of weeks. I can't deal with this stuff**
"Thanks for the input. I'll see if Riley is patrolling tonight." Buffy said putting on her green leather jacket, "Bye Will, I should be back around one."
Willow gave Buffy a quick hug and watched her walk out the door.
* * *
Buffy walked to the Collins Cemetery where three vampires just emerged from the ground. Buffy drop kicked the first vampire with ease who fell back onto his own headstone. Buffy staked him quickly the other two vampires looked at the pile of dust under the Buffy's feet and took off running in opposite direction.
**Which one do I follow?**
That question was quickly answered when Spike caught one of the vampires in the throat with his forearm. It sent the vamp to the ground hard. Buffy quickly chased the other vampire going north. And caught her with ease. This female vampire went down hard from Buffy's tackle. They both quickly regained there composure. But the vamp now held a boxing stance.
**What the . . . **
Buffy felt an right jab hit her fast, then a left, a right and then rib shot. She hit Buffy in the bread basket which caused Buffy fold on the ground. More from shock then actual pain. Buffy got up quickly.
"That's it . . ." Buffy hits the vamp with a roundhouse kick.
"No more, hitting . . ." Buffy levels the vamp with a upper cut of her own.
"ME." Buffy stakes the vampire. Then turns to Spike who is smiling.
*God she looks amazing. Beginning to look like my old slayer again*
"Got the boxing chick, uhh." Spike said laughing. His eyes danced when the moonlight light them.
**He is so annoyingly cute**
"Thanks for the help Spike." Buffy said gritting her teeth.
*You're welcome cutie*
"There ain't goin' be too much action tonight. Checked the obit's in today's paper. They were the only three buried today." Spike added.
"It's only 11:30. I don't want to go home yet." Buffy whispered to herself.
"So let's go to the Bronze." Spike suggested uncertainly. *Why the hell did I say that? She is just going to laugh in my face and say you think that I would seen anywhere with you gain, after that last episode at the Bronze.' I am really stupid.*
"Sure Spike. The crazy pain loving couple back at the Bronze. The freak show continues." Buffy said smiling at Spike.
"Yeah, . . . people must have thought we were crazy." Spike said as he followed Buffy.
Buffy and Spike walked to the Bronze in silence. Not even knowing that they were being watched by someone.
* * *
When they walked inside the Bronze, they moved to table near the back of the club, that way they wouldn't be seen by anyone who came through the door, whether is be human or demon. But it didn't work out that way.
"Hi Buffy!!"
Spike and Buffy turned to see N'Sheena. She had been in Professor Walsh's class with Buffy last year and was in Buffy's Behavioural Psychology class this semester.
"Hi N'Sheena." Buffy smiled and gave the girl a quick hug. Buffy had felt so guilty for stealing her sandwich last year during class, because of the whole beer thing, that when the effects wore off she bought N'Sheena lunch and they became friends.
N'Sheena looked at Spike up and down and then smiled at Buffy, "You sure know how to pick cute ones B."
"Uhh, . . . this is Spike. Spike this is N'Sheena" **Cute ones? This cute one has tried to kill me like a dozen times.**
Spike smiling mischievously extended his arm to N'Sheena, who shook it. *This one is kind of cute herself. If I had this chip out of my head, I would have sired her*
"Well, B, my date is probably wondering where I ran off to. So I will leave you and Spike here to start your date. Bye Buffy, Spike." N'Sheena turned and disappear into the crowd.
"We're not . . ." Buffy started but realized that her words were falling on deaf ears as N'Sheena left.
"You want something to drink?" offered Spike, as he took off his duster and placed it on the chair in front of him. Buffy looked at Spike as if he were speaking chinese.
"Uhh, sure. Just a coke." Buffy replied. **Spike offering to buy me a drink. Spike helping me tonight. Spike comforting me a couple of weeks ago on my back porch. We ARE on a Hell Mouth. But what about that dancing' reference and his attempt to kiss me. Ohh my God he does like me.** Buffy's eyes went wide as the realization hit her.
Spike turned and walked through the crowd to the bar.
* * *
"He still looks good." She said as they walked through the door of the Bronze.
"Will Spike be happy to see you again? You know after Prague and everything." He said.
"We've talked since Prague. We've made amends."
"I didn't know that you two talked that much."
"He calls me when he needs. Like Brazil . . . that was something." She said rolling her eyes.
"Rainne, what are going to say to him. How are you going to . . . make him understand?"
"I have no clue, Raul. But it will happen with or without his consent. I just hope that he will be able to forgive me in the end." They both turned and walked out of the Bronze.
* * *
"Hey Mickey."
"What's up Spike. You and that blond back again. You two must really be into the whips and chains. After that last time you two were here . . ." Mickey's voice trailed off, because of Spike glare.
*Whips, chains. I wish. I really do*
"Just get me a coke and a beer, something Canadian." Spike requested, Mickey obliged, and Spike handed him a ten, "Keep the change."
Spike weaved in and out of the crowd toward their table. He saw Riley entering the club as two others left. Spike handed Buffy her drink and set down his beer.
"I'll be back in a minute, Buffy." he whispered in her ear. *Captain Cardboard would probably have made some comment, on the sweater sniffing or something else. Ain't going to be around for that humiliation.*
His lips that close to Buffy's ear made her shiver. **I hope that he didn't notice that** She turned around to see where Spike had gone, but he simply disappeared. Buffy went back to her coke and looked up to see Riley standing in front of her. Riley looked at the beer then back to Buffy.
"I've been looking for you. I called you after I went home. You didn't answer." Buffy started and reached for his hand. But he kept them close to his sides.
"Who's is this??" Riley gritted through his teeth pointing at the beer. He was wearing a dark blue turtleneck sweater with black jeans. The dark circles underneath his eyes told the tale of sleepiness nights.
"It's Spike's, that's besides the point. Where have you been?"
"I've always been here. That is the point! You just never bothered to acknowledge that." He replied quietly still standing.
**Willow was right. He was angry. I've had never seen him like this before**
"I'm sorry, but with the whole mom thing, I've been . . ."
"You've been, what? Confiding in Spike, keeping secrets from me. Buffy these lasts couple of weeks. I have put myself, my feelings, my pride on the line for you. And you what? You ignore me, you turn from me, you don't even care." Riley choked out as he looked at his love. The only girl that he ever really loved.
Buffy's heart raced. **I had no idea that he felt this way. That he was jealous of Spike. That he felt unwanted** Buffy swallowed hard and started, "Riley I'm sorry. I . . "
"You told me once that you weren't transferry. I highly doubt that. Angel. Dracula. Now Spike. You seem very transferry to me. What's wrong with breathing guys, a little to alive for you. A pulse too much for you to handle Buffy??"
Riley words cut her like a knife. Tears filled her eyes. Tears of anger, hurt, sadness and on some level truth. The music and chatter seemed far away.
It was only them. Only his words. Only her tears. **He wants out. He wants to leave. I want to scream at him, and tell him that I wasn't afraid of a normal relationship. That I wasn't interested in Spike. That I wasn't trying to push him away. But it would all be lies**
She tried to talk. "Riley I . . ."
A song blared through the speakers. For some reason the music filtered into her stirring mind. As their eye locked.
I know what you're doing, I see it all to clear
I only taste the saline when I kiss away your tears
You really had me going, wishing on a star
But the black holes that surround you are heavier by far
I believed in your confusion, you were so completely torn
Well it must have been that yesterday was the day that I was born
There's not much to examine, there's nothing left to hide
You really can't be serious if you have to ask me why
I say goodbye...
'Cause I am barely breathing
And I can't find the air
I don't know who I'm kidding
Imagining you care
And I could stand here waiting
A fool for another day
But I don't suppose it's worth the price, worth the price
The price that I would pay
Tears spilled down Buffy's face.
"Buffy don't. . ." Riley whispered out, trying not to be affected by her reaction. But he hated to see her in pain. Especially since he was the one causing it. ****What about the pain she's caused me****
Everyone keeps asking, what's it all about?
I used to be so certain and I can't figure out
What is this attraction? I only feel the pain
There's nothing left to reason and only you to blame
Will it ever change?
'Cause I am barely breathing
And I can't find the air
I don't know who I'm kidding
Imagining you care
And I could stand here waiting
A fool for another day
But I don't suppose it's worth the price, worth the price
The price that I would pay
Riley steps toward Buffy and kisses on her the cheek, "I'm sorry Buffy I need to start breathing again. I'm leaving in the morning. I'm going back to the army. I'll probably never stop loving you, but a soldier must know when to retreat. Goodbye Buffy."
He turns to leave and sees Spike, Riley looks back at Buffy. Then brushes past Spike almost knocking him over.
Spike sits down at the table. *She looks like she is in shock. He must have dumped her. That bloody daft fool*
**How could Riley do this to me**
Buffy looks down Spike is clasping her hand. And the tears start to flow as Buffy listens to the rest of the song.
I've come to find
I may never know
Your changing mind
Is it friend or foe?
I rise above
Or sink below
With every time
You come and go
Please don't come and go
'Cause I am barely breathing
And I can't find the air
I don't know who I'm kidding
Imagining you care
And I could stand here waiting
A fool for another day
But I don't suppose it's worth the price, worth the price
The price that I would pay
But I'm thinking it over anyway...
But I'm thinking it over anyway...
I know what you're doing, I see it all to clear
Buffy gets up to leave. **Riley is probably long gone. But I am not going to chase him. Why am I not going to chase him**
Spike grabs his duster and walks along side Buffy in silence.
* * *
"What did you do to her?" Willow asks accusingly. After Buffy ran up the stair and slams a door.
"Me?? It's your Agent Finn. He dumped her tonight at the Bronze. The sodding idiot. She hasn't said a word since we left." Spike informed Tara and Willow.
"Men!" Willow exclaimed. "Maybe I should stay with her . . .'
"No go on. I'll stay take care of the brat and the slayer. Comeback in the morning." Spike told them.
Willow and Tara looked at each other but didn't protest.
"If they need anything call us right away. Will be back at eight." Willow informed him as she and Tara were walking out the Summer's front door.
"Are you sure we should leave Spike there?" Tara asked on the way to her car.
"I think it'll be fine. He's chipped, plus I think he's kinda got a thing for Buffy. She told me that he was stealing pictures of her a couple of nights ago from her basement. Weird huh." Willow closed the passenger side door and they left.
* * *
Spike crept up stairs and cracked open Dawn's door. She was fast asleep. He looked in Buffy's room she wasn't their. But he heard the faucets on the bathroom. Her crying was only muffled by the running water in the shower. Spike cautiously knocked on the door. When he got no answer it worried him.
"Come on slayer get out of the shower and answer the door."
"Leave me alone." She sobbed from the other side of the door.
"Buffy open the door."
Silence
"Buffy . . ." Spike said slowly cracking the door and peeking inside.
Buffy was sitting on the on the floor wrapped in a towel, her wet hair clinging to her face. The bathroom was steamed up.
Spike grabbed a towel and turned off the water.
She finally looked up at him, her eyes red and puffy.
*Could she really have loved Riley* Spike's heart sunk at the possibility. He helped her up and walked with her to her room. Spike sat down next to Buffy on her bed and started to dry her hair.
"What are you doing to my sister?" Dawn asked startled by the vampire, first of all being in her sisters room and secondly for gentle drying Buffy's hair. She'd been watching Spike take Buffy out of the bathroom.
"Nothing, br . . . Dawn." Spike replied, continuing to dry Buffy's hair. *At least she's finally stopped crying. Maybe, I should call the Witch back?*
"Buffy? What's wrong?" Dawn looked worried. She glanced at Buffy then at Spike.
"Nothing." Buffy whispered.
Tears gathered in Dawn's eyes, "Is . . . is it mom? Is she d . . ." Dawn couldn't finish the sentence.
"No." Spike said quickly. He left Buffy's side and hugged Dawn who hugged him back with confusion written all over her face.
"Your mom is fine." He said walking Dawn back to her room.
"Where's Riley. Why are you here??"
"Riley and Buffy broke up tonight." Spike told her.
"Why? First Angel, then Scott, their was Parker, and now Riley."
"Just go and sleep Dawn. I'll try to talk to Buffy. Oh yeah and tomorrow the curtains please." Dawn nodded her head, knowing what Spike had meant, as he closed her bedroom door. He went back to Buffy's bedroom to find her lying down on her bed. He stood in the door way.
"What's wrong with me?"
"Nothing is wrong with you pet."
"Then why didn't I see that he was slipping away from me. Something must be wrong with me."
"He was insecure. He didn't even give you a chance. . . to explain I saw the whole thing."
"But . . ."
"But nothing you're going through a family crisis. The most important person in your life is sick and if he doesn't get that then he should leave. He is selfish and ann . . ."
Buffy started to cry again. *Me and my big mouth*
Buffy looked at Spike with her hazel eyes as he walked toward her and sat down next to her. "Riley didn't think I loved him did he?"
"Did you love him?"
"I don't know. . . . I'm tired."
"Okay. I'll be down stairs if you need me." Spike said leaving her room.
* * *
"She looked so sad. Was I wrong? Did she really love? Oh my god I didn't even let her explain. I fell for it I let Spike win. No you didn't you knew a long time ago that she didn't love. Well maybe she didn't love me like she loved Angel, but she loved me nonetheless. Her face said it all. I'm going back to the Bronze maybe she's still there." Riley thought out loud
He turned to go back to the Bronze. Until a scream rang through the night.
"HELP ME."
Riley ran quickly toward the direction of the scream to see a vampire about to sink his teeth in to a young woman in and alley just off of Main St. Riley jumped him from behind and tackled the vamp to the ground. The vampire kicked him off and muttered, "Not worth the hassle." and took off down the street. Riley didn't give chase because he had no weapons.
"Are you all right Miss?"
"I was just walking and then he came up from behind me and . . ." Her voice trailed off, she began to cry, "Thank you."
Her big green eyes looked up at him, she was a cute girl with short black hair and square shaped face, her lips were thin, but pretty nonetheless. She was taller than Buffy maybe 5'8. She pulled Riley in a tight hug, his chin rested right in top of her head, they stayed there embraced for a couple of seconds two strangers in a dark ally.
"My name is Katherine." She said as she pulled away from their embrace
"I'm Riley. So do you usually walk through dark alleys late at night."
"No. But me and my boyfriend broke up to night. We have been going out since high school and I thought that we would get married, have kids and you know the whole happily ever after thing. But he's interested in someone else now. I'm yesterday's news." Katherine choked back a sob, as they began to walk toward Main St.
The others watched from the rooftop as the performance went on.
"Today must have been break up night. My girlfriend and I broke up tonight too." Riley explained.
"We must be kindred then to meet like this." She smiled. Grabbing on to his hand.
A van screeched to a halt in front of them and about six vampires surrounded them and forced them into a van. Riley struggled but it was no use.
****Her hand her hand is so cold. Too cold**** The realization hit him like a wall of fire as he turned to his side to see her quickly put on her game face.
"You really shouldn't have killed my sister . . . Sandy." Katherine backhanded him and then grabbed his hair and yanked his head back, "But your going to pay I promise you."
Her human mask slipped on again. She smiled at him, then hit him until he was unconscious.
To be continued