Friday, November 18,
1988
"Are you set?"
Lee nodded, swiveling
his chair slightly to the right. "I've got my regular passport, my ISP,
and Amanda's working on the duplicates for Joe if. . . when. . . it's
necessary."
His boss nodded.
"And on the other end?"
"I'll have to play
that by ear. There's a guy in Santarilla I think I can work with." Lee
gave a short laugh. "He'll work with anyone as long as the price is
right. I'll rendezvous with Houdini,
and the two of us will take it from there." Lee picked up the pen from his
desk, rolling it back and forth between his fingers. "And if it comes to
that, La Gaviota is still operating."
"That's kind of a
crap shoot, isn't it?"
"It's all a crap
shoot, Billy," he told him with a sigh. "You know that."
He grunted his reply.
From across his desk, Lee watched his friend lean back in his seat, struggling
for a comfortable position in the small, straight-backed chair. "I still can't get used to you sitting
on that side of this desk," Lee grinned. "It somehow doesn't seem
right."
"You sound like
Jeannie," Billy teased, crossing his ankles as he finally settled into the
chair. "She can't seem to get used to my heading off to New York on a
regular basis." Smiling, he added, "It must be the peace and quiet. After
all these years, I don't think she can sleep if the phone doesn't ring at least
three times a night."
Lee tossed his pen onto
his desk, watching as it rolled to a stop by a stack of files. "I guess
there's been a lot to get used to in the past year."
"For everyone. It's
funny," he said, folding his hands across his stomach in a way that made
Lee suspect that ulcer of his was acting up again. "I thought we were
getting used to the idea of this promotion."
He returned his
attention to his desk, studying the 'Officium in Umbris' seal etched carefully
on the top file. "I wouldn't
worry," he said finally, his hand brushing through his hair. "I'm
sure we'll all adjust eventually. It just takes time. At least," he added
in a low voice, "that's what Amanda keeps telling me."
"You should listen
to her. She always did have more common
sense than you did, Scarecrow."
He raised his eyebrows
as he shrugged his shoulders. "I do, Billy. Trust me, that's one lesson
I've finally managed to learn." He took a deep breath, expelling it before
he continued. "We've talked this up one side and down the other. We don't
see any other way out."
"I didn't realize
you and Joe King had become such good friends."
"It's complicated.
He's important to Phillip and Jamie, and I can't just sit here and do nothing
when their father. . ."
"You're about to
become a father yourself," his friend stated quietly.
"You think I don't
know that?" he snapped, forcefully pushing his chair from his desk. Rising, he began to pace the room, making
three circuits before finally coming back to perch on the edge of his desk.
"Sorry," he told Billy brusquely. "I guess I'm on kind of a
short fuse these days." Sighing, he ran his hand through his hair. "I know, on the face of it, this
solution might seem a little. . . extreme. But Billy, this is my job. It's
what I do – have done - for over ten years. If I can get Joe out of there, I
have to try. Besides," he added in
a low voice, "I've got a debt to pay."
"A debt?"
"Yeah."
Titling his head, he caught his friend's eye. "When I was in trouble from
Dr. Smyth's secret organization. . . Joe took me in, hid me at his place, no
questions asked."
"I don't follow
you, Scarecrow. Wasn't Amanda the one
who brought you there? I'm sure Joe did that as much for her as. . ."
"Exactly." He
drew a deep breath, watching as the older man's bewildered expression changed
first into painful understanding, then finally, resignation. Mirroring his
look, he added in a quiet voice, "Did I thank you for giving me the okay
to do this?"
"You know
officially my hands are tied. But I guess it doesn't hurt that you have the new
Director of Covert Operations in your hip pocket," Billy laughed gruffly.
"He seems to have a soft spot for you. If Cartwright was anything like Dr. Smyth, you know I'd never be able to
cover something like this."
"Cartwright's a
good man," he replied, memory fleeting quickly across his face.
"As long as you're
aware that this is an exceptional circumstance. The Section Chief is usually
expected to stay put."
Lee nodded,
acknowledging the gentle reminder that he was no longer a field agent. As much as he loved his new life, he
realized with a pang that a small part of him still longed for the excitement
of the chase. And maybe always would.
Guiltily, he rose, two
long strides taking him to the corner of the room. Resting his hip on the edge
of the smooth mahogany file cabinets that lined the back wall, he looked out
into the bullpen. He could just make out Amanda sitting quietly at her desk, her
cheek resting on her hand as she talked on the phone. He could see the rounded
bulge of her stomach, and his face unconsciously softened. Eyes on the window,
he spoke in a low voice. "I'm
afraid I need one more favor."
"Whatever you
need," came his friend's reply. "After all these years, I've kind of
gotten used to sitting out on that limb with you."
"Then this one
should be a piece of cake." Pulling his eyes away, Lee looked pointedly at
his ex-chief. "Keep an eye on Amanda until I get back? She's still a good
three months from her due date but with everything we've been going through
with Phillip, and now this mess, I'd feel better if I knew she had someone to
count on. You know, just until I. . ."
Billy cut him off with a
wave of his hand. "That's one
promise easily kept." Arms folded
across his chest, he gave Lee a sharp look. "As long as you promise to get
your butt back here to work ASAP." He rubbed his stomach appreciatively.
"I know this used to be my section, but I think doing this job is detrimental
to my health."
Lee smiled. "I
guess that means I can't lure you into taking a quick trip to Mickey's."
"Scarecrow,"
Billy said with mock severity. "When have you ever known a little thing
like my stomach to keep me from the best chili dogs in D.C.? Let's get going,
and that's an order." He trod briskly to the door, his hand resting on the
handle as he shot one final glance over his shoulder. "Just remember one
thing the next time you see Jeannie - this little excursion is strictly 'need
to know'."
"Yes, sir."
Nodding towards the bullpen, he added with a laugh, "That goes both ways."
* * * * *
"All packed?"
"It wasn't too
hard," he replied, holding up the small nylon bag with a grimace.
"I'm traveling light."
She nodded solemnly,
snuggling deeper into the comforter's fluffy warmth. Absently, she traced its
white on white pattern, the down filling bunching beneath her thumb and
forefinger as she stroked. She could feel Lee watching her and, looking up, she
caught his eye.
She saw her own feelings
written plainly across his face. This same scene was played out every day in
countless homes - a typical husband and wife, hashing out the details of a
business trip. Except that they weren't typical, and never would be.
"I wish you'd let
me drive you," she told him wistfully, taking refuge behind the façade of
normalcy they strove so hard to maintain.
"Amanda, we've been
over this." Depositing the bag by the door, he sat down stiffly beside
her. "I'd rather picture you at
home in our bed, getting the rest you need. Besides," he added, leaning in
to kiss her lightly. "You know I hate public goodbyes."
"You don't have to
leave just yet, do you?" She
caught his gaze with her own, watching closely until Scarecrow's intense look
unconsciously softened into her husband's easy countenance.
"I guess we still
have a little time," he murmured, kicking off his shoes as he switched out
the lamp beside the bed.
She threw back the
covers, letting out a long breath as his arms came around her. The bathroom door
was partially open, spilling a narrow corridor of light into the darkening
room. It cast a soft, penumbral glow across the features she loved so
well. She pulled herself deeper into
his embrace, her words muffled against his chest.
"You'll be careful,
won't you?"
"You know I
will." His lips brushed the top of her head. "Houdini is a good man.
Rumor has it he's going to be the Section Chief in the New York office
soon."
"He could be
Director of the Agency, and I'd still think it's my job to watch your
back."
Leaning forward, he planted a tender kiss on her
flattened belly button before drawing back to catch her eye. "You just
watch your front right now," he rejoined, "and let me worry about the
rest."
She sighed, the plaintive sound drifting off into
the darkness as she settled down beside him. Fitting her head against his
shoulder, she clutched his shirt with unusual zeal. "It sure will be a
quiet Thanksgiving without you." She shut her eyes, crumpling the smooth cloth
into her closed fist. "And I thought
we were going to have so much to be thankful for this year."
He rubbed his hand
tenderly across her stomach. "We still do, Sweetheart. Don't worry; things will work out all
right."
"You know, I think
that's the first time I've ever heard you say that," she whispered
incredulously.
"That things will
work out?"
"No," she
smiled, giving him a tender kiss. "'Sweetheart'."
She heard his gentle
laugh. "You must be rubbing off on me."
"Or
things must be worse than you'll admit."
He
took a deep breath, exhaling loudly. "I'll get Joe out of this, I promise.
Trust me?"
"You
know I do." She sighed again, releasing her death grip on his shirt. Her
fingers smoothed the fabric, feeling the comfort of his strong chest through
the roughened material, but it wasn't enough. Her fingers quickly found the top
button, fumbling a little in her haste to undo it. "I'm just so worried
about the boys. Jamie's so upset again
and Phillip. . . well, it's just impossible to know what he's thinking these
days."
"I tried to talk to
him earlier when I was saying goodbye to Jamie," Lee told her, his voice a
husky whisper. "But the cold war
is still raging."
She felt the heat of his
gaze as she turned her attention to the next button, her fingers tracing small
circles across his skin as she quickly exposed it. "It's funny," she
said sadly, sliding her hand around to caress his back and shoulders. The feel
of his flesh beneath her fingers, solid and warm and here, soothed her
overwrought nerves. "I've always worried that Jamie was too introspective
for his own good, but at least he knows what it is he's feeling. Phillip just
gets mad. I remember when Joe left on his first assignment for the EAO. . .
" Sighing, she burrowed deeper into her husband's arms. "He refused
to talk for three whole days."
Lee chuckled softly.
"I once avoided saying anything to the Colonel for an entire week."
"Yeah?" She
smiled wistfully. Since her pregnancy, he'd been more open about his childhood,
slipping in these little tidbits of information when she least expected
them. "So, what started you
talking again?"
"I think it was
when I realized that he really seemed to enjoy the peace and quiet."
He didn't offer any more
information, and Amanda knew he would tell her the rest in his own time. Two
years of marriage had taught her that the less she pushed, the more he
revealed. Resting her head on his shoulder, she pushed his shirt aside, her
fingers stroking soothingly across his skin.
"I think it's a
pretty safe bet that Phillip's just as worried about his father as Jamie
is," she heard him say at last, his voice dropping lower as her hand moved
in a similar direction. "He just doesn't know how to show it without
ruining that tough guy image he's been working so hard to perfect." He sighed, his own fingers playing
caressingly over her arm. "Sometimes the hardest thing of all is to admit
that you need someone to help you."
"You
tough guys," she murmured, her lips barely grazing his cheek. "You're
all alike; aren't you?"
"Maybe we are at
that." He gave a bitter laugh, his forced grin slowly melting into a
frown. "I really blew it with him the night he missed his curfew. I was so
angry that he'd upset you that I let it get in the way and I. . . Damn, Amanda, I never thought I'd say this,
but I think I've actually become my uncle."
"I highly doubt
that," she laughed, giving him a playful squeeze. "He's much shorter." She turned
his face towards hers, straining forward to lightly kiss him. "I hate to
break this to you, Lee, but no one's perfect. Making mistakes isn't something
that's only reserved only for stepparents – or uncles. Mothers and fathers do
it all the time."
His fingers wandered
across her abdomen. "Do you think it'll be any easier with him?"
"I can practically
guarantee that it won't." She moved his hand a little to the left.
"See, he's already giving me a hard time, and he's not even here
yet."
She heard Lee's rumbling
laugh. "I don't know how you manage to sleep."
"He's pretty
active," she laughed. "I must be getting used to it. Your son seems
to have his days and nights completely turned around."
"Well, I used to be
a night owl myself."
"Oh yeah? What
changed?"
He put his lips against
her ear, nibbling lightly. "I grew up and saw the benefits to that 'early
to bed' stuff much more clearly."
She gave a low laugh.
"I see your point." She
draped her leg over her husband's, pulling herself even closer. "I don't
want to lose you," she whispered, her mood suddenly serious.
"You won't,"
he murmured in an equally shaky voice as his lips sought hers. Amanda felt the power in his kiss, drawing
her in and making her believe. "I promise."
He started to move away. "Not yet," she entreated, burying her lips in his neck
as she quickly pulled him back.
"Amanda," he
whispered, running his hand caressingly across her cheek. He swept her hair back and away from her
face, catching the ends between his thumb and forefinger. When he sighed, it
was with indescribable longing. "Amanda," he repeated, his hands moving down to grip her arms,
stilling her movements and forcing her to look at him. "Please. This is already hard enough
without. . ."
"Sh-shh." Her
lips covered his, cutting off his refusal. She knew what he was trying to tell
her. They usually kept their physical relationship in check when the stakes
were this high. She knew, too, that Scarecrow was already gearing up for what
lay ahead. She could see it in his eyes, in that quiet intensity smoldering
beneath her husband's loving gaze. When the time came, she would let Scarecrow
go; but for the moment, Lee still belonged to her.
"Please," she
whispered tenderly. Leaning in, she traced the outline of his ear with her
tongue. She felt him shiver in
response, pulling her as close as her belly would allow, and she murmured
softly, "Please, Lee. . . make
love with me."
His eyes locked on hers,
and she watched as he lost the battle, giving in to the same desire that
gripped her. It was a longing of the heart, not the body. The need for one last
emotional connection was almost overpowering.
He rolled away, quickly
shrugging out of his shirt. She could hear the sound of his zipper, followed by
a dull thud as his pants hit the carpeted floor. She shivered slightly, already
anticipating the feel of his hands on her body. As her pregnancy advanced,
their lovemaking had subtly changed. Wild abandon had been replaced with a loving tenderness that was somehow
even more arousing. The burgeoning
presence of the life they'd created with their love strengthened their
emotional bond tenfold.
Lee turned towards her,
his hands gently cupping her face. His gaze was so intense, almost as if he was
trying to commit her tiniest feature to memory. He sighed softly as he leaned
in, and she murmured in response as his lips found hers. He kissed her, tenderly
at first, then with steadily increasing pressure as his arms tightened around
her. She parted her lips, enjoying the feeling as he entered her mouth. As
their tongues met, the fears they'd been afraid to voice were temporarily put
to rest. The kiss ended, but his mouth still lingered, nibbling sensuously on
her upper lip as he held her close.
His hands moved surely
to her nightgown, tracing a path along her body as he raised it up over her
head. She shivered slightly as the air made contact with her bare skin and,
overcome with a sudden, inexplicable vulnerability, she looked away, unable to
meet his eye.
"I love you,
Amanda." The words were whispered
close to her ear in soft yet distinct tones, and she marveled again at his
uncanny ability to sense her deepest feelings.
"I love you,
too," she echoed as she felt him press his body close to her right
side. His desire was clearly evident as
he rubbed against her, and she breathed deeply in response. He leaned closer,
his warm mouth covering her right breast as his hands searched out the places
that made her feel warmer still. His fingers worked, and as her breath came in
shorter and shorter gasps, she pulled away, her mouth moving slowly down his
body.
She heard his quick gasp
of pleasure and took delight in it, enjoying what she could still do to him
despite her rapidly increasing girth. She could feel it in the way his body tensed and trembled, hear it in
the softly muffled sounds that escaped his lips despite his best intentions.
Looking up, she caught his eye and, seeing the same urgency mirrored there, she
rolled on her side, backing up against him as he quickly grabbed a pillow to
place between her lower legs. He shifted and nestled close behind her until
there was no space between them, and she let out a satisfied sigh as she felt
their bodies fit perfectly together.
Closing her eyes, she
tried to give in to the pleasure of pure physical sensation, to let their union
wash the worry from her mind. Despite her best efforts, unwelcome thoughts
still intruded. She sensed Lee struggling to wait for her, but as she felt the
tension gathering in every part of his body, she realized with a sigh that
mutual ecstasy was out of reach tonight. They were both far too distracted.
She reached over his arm,
her fingers rubbing tenderly along his hip. He groaned, a muted sound that
bespoke his frustrated desire, and she responded automatically. His breath came
in roughened gasps as he let go and she sighed softly, feeling him slowly relax
his hold as he collapsed down into the bed.
She felt his lips nuzzle
her neck as his arm snaked around her. "I'm sorry," he murmured
softly against her shoulder. "Here, let me. . ."
"I don't
care," she replied in a shaky voice, tugging on his arm. "Just hold me. That's all I want."
He complied, enfolding
in a tender embrace. The light from the bathroom filled the bed with a golden
glow as darkness completely claimed the windowpanes. She lay with him in
dream-like suspension, her pulse beating powerfully in her wrist where his
strong hand enveloped it. She pressed her back tightly against him, so close
that they breathed together.
"Ill be back before
you have time to miss me, Amanda," she heard him whisper in soothing tones
as he clasped her to him. "I promise."
TBC…