Also, if you are a John fan, you may want to turn back now. This series will most definitely not be portraying him in a positive light. Don't flame me because you didn't turn back when warned.
And now, on with the show…
Agony
"…Blank stare
Disrepair
There's a big black hole
Gonna eat me up someday
Someday
Fades away
Like a memory
Or a place where you wanna be
Someplace
Lost in space…"
I down one of the many Heinekens I have in my fridge as Trent Reznor howls through my radio.
Sam. Bailey. Engaged to be married.
I try to make these thoughts disappear, to think of something else, but nothing seems to help. Not even thinking of other women whom I'd like to take a roll in the hay with. All I see are those baby blue eyes…
Shaking my head I come out of my reverie to obey the angry rumbling of my stomach. Walking into my kitchen I glance up at the clock.
7:30
Opening the door, I grab the first thing I see –a box of Chinese food, Pork fried rice to be exact- and some of her first words to me begin to echo through my mind…
"You want a theory? You've got Chinese food in your refrigerator. You like your women in heels, your Scotch straight and yourself definitely on top. But it's just a theory."
Shaking my head again, I open the box and sniff, hurriedly pulling my nose out of it when I realize that it's gone bad.
"Goddamn it," I hiss, tossing it into the garbage. Scowling, I begin to hunt for my keys, and when I find them I pick up the phone and make a take out order for…more Chinese food. They don't have a Bean Boy Burger joint down here, so I have to do with what I've got.
As I walk to my car, a nasty thought begins to form in my head.
For once John, do what YOU want to do…and screw THEM…it's time for YOU to have some fun for once…
"It is, isn't it?" I murmur softly. "It is indeed." Of course, my conscience tries to get some words in, but for once I don't listen. I'm tired of listening to people telling me what to do every minute of the day, telling me how to act. Why couldn't I do what I wanted to do for once?
Dark thoughts began to rise unbidden in my head, just to be replaced by more of the same, and I smiled as this time my conscience didn't even try to interfere. Jack didn't have a chance in Hell of getting Sam, but maybe I did…