"The Purple Rose Saga": An otakufic by King Reanna
Episode
Five: "Happy Egg"
Original
version, "Miki's Shining Thing" written Nov. 21-22, 1999
Second
version written Dec. 26-28
[Scene:
The dance hall. Grams: "Butou no Eros." We
see Utena, Anshi and Miki in the foreground, with Touga, Kozue and Nanami
behind them.]
Utena: We have to stop them!
Miki: We can't let Akio-sama… well… you
know… (blush)
(Touga
walks by the three of them, up to Akio and Reanna)
Touga: Akio-sama, I can't let you do this.
Akio: And why would that be? She seems to
be willing enough.
Reanna: Yeah, Touga. You'll get your turn
soon enough.
Touga: (grabs Reanna's arm) Come on, Reanna.
(Pulls her away from Akio)
Reanna: Akio-sama, I will come back to you.
(Turns to Touga) Hey, where's Miki-kun? (giggles)
(Touga
sweatdrops. NOTE: Throughout all of this, no one else really seems to notice
what's going on)
(We see
Utena, Anshi, Miki, Juri, Nanami and Kozue again. Miki and Utena are flipping
through a chemistry textbook)
Miki: Well, as near as I can figure…
Utena: Kozue, Nanami, I'll ask you one more
time… what did you do to that punch?
Kozue: (defiantly) I don't remember.
Utena: Kozue, I can't understand what could
make you hate her so much.
Miki: (shuts the textbook) It's my fault.
(Touga
comes back over with Reanna, who wears a big smile on her face)
Touga: I brought Reanna back. Have you
figured it out yet?
(All
shake their heads)
Touga: Damn.
Nanami: (trying to embrace Touga, but Reanna
is already there) Forgive me, Oniisama! I just can't remember what we did to
that punch!
Utena: I really don't believe the two of
you!
Touga: (holding Reanna at arm's length)
Don't worry, Tenjou-kun. We'll figure something out.
(A
teacher walks by)
Teacher: Is there something wrong here? I
heard yelling.
Juri: (ever calmly) Nanimo, sensei.
Teacher: Okay. Just checking. (Exit teacher)
Reanna: (smiling lasciviously) Miki, come
here.
(All
sweatdrop, Miki trips while "scootches" away from the general area)
(Enter
Wakaba. She wears a fairly decent green dress)
Wakaba: Utena-sama! (glomps Utena)
Utena: Oh, hi, Wakaba.
Wakaba: (observes the unusual scene and gets
off Utena's back) So what's going on here?
Utena: Kozue and Nanami turned Reanna into a
playgirl by putting something in her punch. We're trying to figure out how to
turn her back.
Wakaba: Hmm. Well, you know, I've always been
good at chemistry. Why don't I try to work something out?
Juri: (raises an eyebrow) Anata?
Wakaba: Don't worry about it! I'll fix this!
Title: "Happy Egg"
[Scene:
A certain wall at a random sunset. Grams:
"Kashira Seijin." Kagee Shoujo-tachi A and B appear]
A-Ko: Kashira? Kashira?
B-Ko: Oh, dear girl, this is unexpected!
A-Ko: Don't worry, don't worry! (pats B-Ko
on the shoulder)
B-Ko: (curiously) But, why not? Why not
worry in a world where nothing is as it seems?
A-Ko: (laughs maniacally) In a world where
nothing is as it seems, order does not exist!
B-Ko: Do you know why that is?
Both: (As they bob up and down) Do you
know? Do you know? Do you know why that is?
(Fade
out)
[Scene:
The dance hall. Grams: "Butou no Eros." Touga
still holds Reanna at arms' length. Reanna still has that lascivious look on
her face. Enter Wakaba, running. She holds a tiny test tube]
Wakaba: I've done it! I've done it! (she
stops running, panting)
Reanna: (with a kawaii curious look on her
face) What's that?
Wakaba: (in a friendly tone) This will return
you to normal, Reanna-sempai.
Reanna: (offended) And just what do you mean
by that?
Wakaba: Hold her, Touga-sempai! (Touga does
so)
Reanna: (Reanna looks startled until she
settles in) Mmm… this is nice.
(We see
the faces of other cast members as we hear Reanna coughing and spluttering.
Kozue looks disappointed; Nanami looks amused. Other students begin noticing
what's going on)
Utena: (noticing the growing crowd) Go away,
minna! There's nothing to see here!
(Touga
lets go of Reanna)
Miki: Reanna-sama? Are you okay?
Reanna: (coughs a little) Hai. I'm fine now…
Arigato, Wakaba-kun.
Utena: (obviously impressed) Good job,
Wakaba! You really managed to do it!
(Kozue
and Nanami look genuinely disappointed)
(Suddenly,
Reanna's eyes become larger and much more kawaii)
Reanna: Touga! Touga-sama!
(Reanna
gets behind Touga and glomps him)
Touga: (not significantly affected, even
when Reanna begins to glomp-huggle) Wakaba-kun?
Wakaba: Uh… oops.
(Touga
has managed to pry Reanna off of him, but Reanna glomps onto Juri instead)
Utena: Uh… this could be a problem.
Reanna: (In a very Wakaba-like manner) Why?
Nanami: She's just like Wakaba! (does her
annoying laugh)
Touga: Nanami!
Nanami: (embraces Touga; this time there's no
Reanna in the way) Forgive me, Oniisama!
Touga: Wakaba-kun… can you fix it?
Wakaba: I'm… not sure… I don't know what went
wrong.
Juri: Well, you'd better figure out how to
fix it.
[Scene:
An elevator. Caption: "The next day" Grams:
"Densetsu: Kami no Na wa Abraxas." The silhouettes of Miki, Reanna and
Touga appear one by one.
Touga: If it cannot hatch from its shell,
the chick will die without being born. We are the chick; the world is our egg.
If we don't crack the world's shell, we will die without truly being born.
Smash the world's shell…
All: For the Revolution of the World!
(We see
Touga sitting at a chair. Reanna is glomp-huggling Miki, who barely seems to be
supporting her weight)
Reanna: Mikimikimikimikimikimikimiki…
Touga: (Reanna continues her chanting even
as he says this) Reanna, perhaps you should get off Miki.
Reanna: (disappointed) Okay… (Reanna gets
off, and the two sit down)
Miki: So I guess Wakaba hasn't been able to
fix the glomping thing yet.
Touga: Not yet.
(Enter
Juri)
Juri: (Holds up a test tube) Wakaba has
finished the antidote. This should be fine.
Touga: But how do we…
Juri: (smiles slyly, points away)
Reanna-sempai, look over there. Someone you haven't glomped yet.
Reanna: (very eagerly) Where? Where? Up here?
Really?
(Touga
pours the chemical into Reanna's drink and smiles)
Reanna: (looking back) Juri, you tease!
There's no one there! (Tries to glomp Juri, but since she's already seated,
Reanna just bounces off the back of her chair. Miki, Juri and Touga look at
each other)
(Reanna
takes a sip of her drink. Her eyes become less kawaii—they become their usual
selves)
Touga: Reanna, are you back to normal now?
Reanna: (pause) Hai.
(All
breathe sighs of relief)
Touga: Well, good. Anyway, it seems that we
there has been a challenge to Tenjou Utena, the current duelist champion, and
as it turns out, it's none of us.
(Everyone
looks very surprised)
Reanna: Well, then, who is it?
(Eyecatch)
[Scene: The Rose Doors. Utena
approaches them. A random drop of "cold!" water emerges from them to caress her
Rose Seal ring. The columns of water shoot up and the mechanism opens the great
stone doors. Utena climbs the stairs as "Zettai
Unmei Mokushiroku" plays. She finally reaches the top, huffing and puffing.
We see the floating castle that hangs in the air above)
Utena: I was never… even told… who had
challenged me.
(Utena
spots Anshi standing next to her challenger—Chu-Chu, fully clad in a duelist
uniform and holding a tiny little sword)
Utena: Chu-Chu? You're my challenger?
Chu-Chu: (proudly) Chu. Chu, chu, chu!
(We hear
the massive bells ringing, signaling the start of the duel. Anshi gives Utena a
white rose and Chu-Chu a lavender one)
Anshi: Oh, rose of the noble castle… Power
of Dios that sleeps within me… Heed your master and come forth!
(Utena
bends Anshi back and draws the Sword of Dios from her chest and brandishes it)
Utena: Grant me the power to bring the world
revolution!
(A
Japanese techno rock song begins and Chu-Chu lunges at Utena)
Chu-Chu: Chu!
(Utena
tries swinging the Sword, but obviously has trouble swinging at such a small
target)
(Chu-Chu
burrows into Utena's fuku. Utena dances around)
Utena: (laughs) Chu-Chu, get out of there!
Chu-Chu: Chu chu chu chu chuuuuu!
Utena: Chu-Chu!
(Chu-Chu
emerges from Utena's left sleeve)
Chu-Chu: Chu!
(We see
Touga watching through opera glasses)
(Chu-Chu
is kind of "hacking" at Utena's rose)
Touga: Could it be that…?
(We hear Utena gasp. Her rose falls to the ground. The bells ring, and the song
ends.)
Utena: I… I…
Anshi: (Approaches Chu-Chu, with a smile)
Congratulations, Chu-Chu. I am now your bride.
(Chu-Chu
and Anshi walk off)
Utena: (confused) Well, I suppose that's
only fitting.
(Fade to
"To be continued…" screen)
Preview
of next episode:
(Grams: "Jikai Yokoku." We see Anshi,
Utena, Touga, Nanami, Juri, Chu-Chu, Miki and Akio sitting around the table. We
also see Reanna on crutches, the Seitokai conversing, Reanna being slapped, and
Akio helping her up)
V.O.
Reanna: I don't
know what I'm going to do! First, I break my leg, then everybody's
personalities have switched and I'm the one who has to fix things! Even worse,
you won't believe who Miki exchanges his personality with!
V.O.
Utena: Next
time on "Shoujo Kakumei Utena:" "Ohtori is a Character Gallery!"
Author's
note: In the original version, Kozue did add something to the punch, but it had
an entirely different effect on me. I think this version is funnier. I read
this again recently and realized that the part with Chu Chu in Utena's uniform
reminds me of Ecchi Adventures! (READ IT HERE:
http://www.fanfiction.net/index.fic?action=story-read&storyid=118446)