~~~~~~~~~~~
(A/N: Just pretend that there's a background with a bunch of compasses. I don't know how to post HTML on FF.N. Humor me.)
Nin: Oh, hello! I wasn't expecting company today. Then again, I never am, am I? Come in, come in.
Dee: NIN!!! What the hell are you up to NOW?
Nin: Um...read the title, oh Muse of mine.
Dee: I AM NOT YOUR MUSE!!! I AM YOUR SISTER!!!
Nin: Yes, Muse.
Dee: sigh Anyway, what the hell is Gundam 1/2?
Nin: It's a fusion. The Gundam characters are going to act out the Ranma 1/2 manga.
Dee: WHAT?! ARE YOU COMPLETELY INSANE?!
Nin: Why, yes I am.
Dee: facefault And what's up with this stupid background? It has nothing to do with either series...unless you count Ryoga.
Nin: Oh, no. This background was not meant to poke fun at the poor, directionally challenged young man.
Dee: Then what is it for?
Nin: I'm trying to find my way back to the land of sanity. I thought that staring at compasses for hours on end would help me out.
Dee: Nin, with your luck, you'll probably just end up getting lost in the land of INSANITY.
Nin: Oh, didn't I tell you? I already AM lost in the land of insanity. Why did you think I wrote this in the first place?
Dee: I gathered that. Hey, wait, what am I doing here?
Nin: Oh, my... Should I spell it out?
Dee: I AM NOT INSANE!!!
Nin: Oh, dear, the poor girl is in denial...
Dee: I AM NOT IN DENIAL!!!
Nin: She's denying that she's in denial. This is pretty serious. This is a job for...the Men in White!
(Several Men in White appear, and drag Dee off in a straight jacket)
Dee: (offscreen) I AM NOT INSANE!!! IT'S HER, I TELL YOU!!! HER!!!
Nin: Oh, dear. Now who will bring me back to the land of sanity? Oh, well. I guess I'll just have to enjoy myself while I'm here...MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
(The scene fades out as Nin continues to cackle madly)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gundam 1/2
by
Nin Tendo
Prologue
~ Disclaimer ~ I don't own Gundam Wing or Ranma 1/2, I'm just temporarily insane!!!
WARNING! Everyone who's in this fic will be OOC and bashed at some point.
Duo happily polished his new car. (After Deathsythe self-detonated, his interests had turned to the more traditional masculine hobbies) It was a great day on Earth. The sun was shining, the sky was clear, and the slight breeze reminded him of a small child, tugging his clothes, shouting, "Come and play with me!"
And then the enexpected happened. Something so horrible, so terrible, so totally FREAKY, that Duo froze in complete terror!!!
"DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU~~~~~~~~OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~~~~~!!!!!!!!!
Duo looked around, frantically, searching for an escape route. His instncts screamed at him, telling him to flee, run away, before he was delivered a fate worse than death itself!!!
However, there was no place to run, no place to hide.
Nin had another fanfic idea.
Duo tried to get away, but Nin grabbed his braid first. Duo cried out in pain.
"Hey, Duo!" Nin chirped. "I got another idea, and guess what?"
"...What?" Duo said, his curiousity getting the better of him. He tried to not let the foreboding get to him. Nin could have actually thought up a GOOD fic.
As if!
"You're the protagonist!" Nin shrieked.
"Protagonist...?" Duo asked. "Isn't that the character that the conflict revolves around?"
Nin chuckled a little hesitantely. "It's a...love story. What really happens in a love story? Guy falls for Girl, Girl falls for Guy, Guy and Girl defeat the obstacles to their love, and live happily ever after!" (A/N: Heh....n_n)
Duo's eyes narrowed. "You're gonna make me take part in a CHICK FLIC?!"
Nin cowered in fear. "It's not a chick flic, I SWEAR!"
"Then what is it?"
"A fusion with Ranma 1/2."
"What the hell is Ranma 1/2?"
"...A love story?"
Duo glowered.
"Okay, look," Nin surrendered, "I'm not gonna throw you into another universe. It's just gonna be a play. You guys all need to lighten up a bit. Here's a picture of the guy that you get to act out." She held up a picture of a guy with a braid like Duo's, except it was black, really short and tight, and his eyes were a gray/blue.
Duo snorted. "This guy doesn't look like me at all! Why don't you get Wufei to do it?"
Nin started bawling. "I tried Wufei already!!! Look what he did to my arm!!!" She held up her arm, showing off a tiny scratch.
Duo sweat-dropped. "Give me one good reason to agree with this."
"You get nude scenes with Hilde."
"You've got yourself an actor!!!" Duo shouted, a little too early.
=======================================================================================
"Tell me again why we're all here, Hilde?" Relena asked.
"Uh...Nin told me that we all needed to havesome fun once in a while, so we're acting out a manga series in play form," Hilde answered. 'And she promised nude series with Duo if I managed to convince everyone to come," she added, mentally.
"What manga series is it?" Quatre asked, feeling apprehensive.
Hilde probed her memory for the answer. It was on the tip of her tongue... "It had a really weird title....it had a fraction in it, I think."
"Ranma 1/2?" Trowa supplied, holding back a grin. He had read the manga befoe, and knew what it was about.
"Yeah, that's it!" Hilde exclaimed. "We're gonna have a lot of fun, aren't we, guys?"
Trowa and Heero smirked at each other. Heero had read the manga, too.
"I have a bad feeling about this..." Catherine said, staring at Trowa's grin suspiciously.
"I'll be happy as long as there are battles," Dorothy announced.
"Oh, you'll be happy, Dorothy," Heero cracked. He and Trowa started to chuckle underneath their breatth.
Everyone stared at the two, as if they had suddenly transformed into alien beings...which they kinda did. OOC aliens must have taken over their bodies, I suppose....
Wufei snorted. "I don't know why this stupid woman brought me here, but it's not worth my time."
Sally giggled. "Oh, you know why you came, Wufei..." She winked at him.
Wufei blushed, and everyone else stared at him, sweatdropping.
"Oh, well," Noin said, poking Zechs in the ribs, "at least we have a vacation from the Terra-forming project, eh, Zechs?"
Zechs snorted. "If you could call it a vacation," he said, glaring at Heero, who was standing too close to Relena. In his opinion, anyway.
Noin sighed. "Lighten up, Zechs. You're stressing yourself out."
Heero noticed Zechs's glare, and smirked. He leaned over and whispered something into Relena's ear. She looked at her brother's expression, and giggled.
Zechs's blood began to boil.
Noin chuckled, then started to massage Zechs's shoulders, trying to calm him down.
Suddenly, the door burst open, and Nin entered, followed by Duo. "We~~~~'re~~~~ he~~~~re~~~~!!!!" Nin shrieked. Everyone covered their ears. A window shattered.
"Nin's on another of her infamous sugar highs," Catherine said, removing her hands from her ears. Everyone nodded, except Nin, who frowned.
"It's not my fault that all the sugar I eat explodes through my system at 10:00 pm!!!" Nin shouted, explaining her rather...bizarre...condition.
Everyone stared at Nin as if she was crazy. (Which she was...lol)
"It's true!!!" Nin claimed.
"Yeah, right," everyone else muttered.
Nin did a terrible impression of Heero's Death Glare (tm). When she saw that it didn't affect anyone, she sighed, and continued. "Well, now that we're all here--"
"Where are we, anyway?" Lady Une asked, looking at all the strange looking scenery and props.
"A theatre," Nin answered, annoyed at being interrupted. "Anywa, now that we're all here, I can assign parts!!!"
"Yea. Woo hoo," the Gundam people said, bored.
Nin glared at everyone. "Okay, since there are a LOT of characters in Ranma 1/2, some of you will have to act out multiple parts. I'll also be bringing some people back to life."
"You can do that?" asked Duo.
"Yeah!" Nin said, proud. "I can also kill people off! Wanna see?"
Duo rolled his eyes. "Yeah, right. You'd probably mess up, and kill YOURSELF!" He laughed.
Duo dies.
Everyone gasps.
Duo comes back to life.
Everyone gasps.
"Cool!" Duo said. "I had a tea party with Shinigami!!!"
"Any questions?"
~Silence...~
"Alrighty then!" Nin brings Trieze and the mad scientists back to life.
"TRIEZE-SAMA!!!!!" Lady Une cried, glomping Trieze. Trieze passes out from lack of air. And so, Trieze's first memory of his new life was falling asleep.
"Damn," Professor G said. "I almost talked that cute demon into giving me a foot massage."
"There!" Nin cried out, in joy. "All done! Here's everyone's roles! The people playing multiple minor characters are labelled as 'extra'!" she said, pinning a sheet of paper on the wall.
~~~
Who plays who:
Duo: Ranma, 'Ranko'
Hilde: Akane
Heero: Ryoga
Relena: Kodachi, Akari
Trowa: Mousse
Quatre: Extra
Catherine: Ukyo
Dorothy: Shampoo
Noin: Nabiki, Mariko
Lady Une: Kasumi
Treize: Dr. Tofu
Master O: Genma
Dr. J: Cologne
Professor G: Happosai
Instructor H: Soun
Doktor S: The little old lady across the street, Extra
Zechs: Tatewaki
Wufei: Pantyhose
Sally: Extra
Have a nice day! n_n
~~~
Heero's eyes widened. (Damn those OOC aliens!!!) "Relena plays KODACHI?!" he shouted, in a very OOC fashion.
"You're INSANE, Nin!" Trowa accused.
"I know...." Nin said, smirking, "and so is Kodachi!"
"I thought you supported me!" Relena cried, assuming (correctly) that she had to act out an insane person.
"I do!" Nin said, confused. "That's why you play Akari!"
"But, why Kodachi? Wouldn't Dorothy be better?" Heero growled.
"I toyed with that idea," Nin answered, "but Shampoo would suit Dorothy so much better, and she can't be both, because they sometimes appear in the same scene. I mean, really! Can you see RELENA playing Shampoo?"
Heero doesn't know if he should growl or drool at the though of Relena playing Shampoo.
"Don't worry," Nin whispered, so only Heero would hear. "You still get to see her in that skin-tight leotard!" (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)
Heero drooled, then growled when he realized hat everyone else would see her in the leotard, too.
"Why do I play an old woman?" Doktor S asked, fuming.
"You're not alone," Nin answered, gigging, staring at Dr. J.
'Why is she looking at me?' Dr. J thought, chills running down his spine.
"INJUSTICE!!!" Wufei screamed.
"What is it, Wufei?" Nin asked, still pissed off at him for cutting her arm.
"Oh, Wufei's just angry that he acts out a guy named after a woman's undergarment," Sally explained.
"Bwahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!" Nin laughed, manically, then tried to look innocent.
'Yeah, right,' everyone else thought.
"Hey, who's 'Ranko'?" Duo asked. "You told me that I play Rama, not this 'Ranko' person!"
Nin hid a bucket behind her back, and walked toward him. "Oh, Ranma and 'Ranko' are the same person..." She smiles evilly.
"Oh. A split personality, you mean?" Duo asked, oblivious to his impending doom.
Heero and Trowa noticed, but they just smirked. Then they realized that they would have the same fate, and made themselves scarce. (They hid behind Relena and Catherine. n_n)
"A split personality? Um...yes, that's it," Nin lied.
"Cool!" Duo shouted, happy that he got an interesting part.
Nin splashed Duo with the water in the bucket.
"Cold!" Duo shouted, in a voice a few octaves higher than normal.
Everyone stared at Duo. He was shorter than usual, his hair was bright read, his eyes were bright blue, and his face was more delicate looking.
He was also female.
"Gyaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!" Duo screamed, in a high, girly voice, looking down his shirt.
While everyone was occupied with Duo's transformation, Nin splashed Master O with another bucket. He became a panda.
"Growf," said Master O.
"What the hell is this?!" Duo screamed, paralized with shock.
"Insurance," Nin answered. "I'll give you the cure after the play is finished, but only AFTER the play is finished!"
"You PSYCHO!!!" Duo screamed, tackling Nin, and pounding the crap out of her.
"Yes, that's it! Get into character!" Nin said, between blows.
(One hour later)
After nearly getting killed at Duo's hands, Nin finally decided to go ahead and tell Duo that he just needed to splah himself with hot water to rejoin the male gender.
Duo and Master O left to take a shower.
Nin neglected to tell them that their cursed forms were permanent, triggered by cold water. Hot water was only a temporary cure.
Somehow, Nin miraculously healed from her wounds. Maybe the OOC aliens have possessed her, too.
"Why am I Ryoga?" Heero asked.
"Because you're always angry and/or depressed, and in Endless Waltz, you said, 'I've been lost ever since the day I was born'!" Nin answered.
"I didn't mean it literally..." Heero grumbled.
"I suppose I'm Mousse, because I work in the circus?" Trowa guessed.
"Yup! It's even the knife throwing act, too! Ain't that a coinicidence? Except now you get to be the one who throws the knives!" Nin replied.
"You're lucky that I'm a good actor," Trowa grumbled, "because no one in their right mind would obsess over DOROTHY."
"I resent that remark," Quatre grumbled underneath his breath.
"Mousse is actually pretty stotic when he's not raving about Shampoo," Nin offered.
"But I'm not blind!" Trowa protested.
"You might as well be," Nin replied, pointing at his uni-bang. "Oh! I almost forgot! I have to do all you guys's hair!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~~~~~~!!!!" everyone screamed.
Nin pouted. "Fine."
Everyone else sighed in relief.
"Well, I guess that's it for today. OH! I almost forgot! To minimize confusion, I'll be using the G-people's names instead of the Ranma names. ...Except for Wufei, who will be called 'Pantyhose Wufei'!!! Bwahahahaha!!!!!"
"Then what was the use of the role list? You're probably just going to confuse people even MORE. What if they get hooked on Ranma 1/2 through you, and they decide to watc/read it? Wouldn't they get confused about the names?" Noin asked.
Nin paused, then said, "That's not MY problem!!!"
"What a nice person," Hilde mocked, quietly, so Nin wouldn't hear, and kill her off.
Author's Notes:
1. Yes, everyone is going to be OOC and bashed at some point in the story. There's not going to be any special treatment!!! No, I don't want ANY remarks about OOC or character bashing! I bash myself the worst! Isn't that enough?
2. There's this quote that goes something like: "Blessed are those who laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused." HELL, YES! n_n
3. Oh, and a note on alternate forms...Duo will be known as Duo-onna, Master O as O-panda, ect. (I'll think up something for everyone else when the time comes...)
4. I give you permission to flame me for this. This fic screams, "FLAME ME", so I won't scream it myself. Just don't flame about OOCness or character bashing, or you will be included in the next chapter. (Heh)
(A/N: Just pretend that there's a background with a bunch of compasses. I don't know how to post HTML on FF.N. Humor me.)
Nin: Oh, hello! I wasn't expecting company today. Then again, I never am, am I? Come in, come in.
Dee: NIN!!! What the hell are you up to NOW?
Nin: Um...read the title, oh Muse of mine.
Dee: I AM NOT YOUR MUSE!!! I AM YOUR SISTER!!!
Nin: Yes, Muse.
Dee: sigh Anyway, what the hell is Gundam 1/2?
Nin: It's a fusion. The Gundam characters are going to act out the Ranma 1/2 manga.
Dee: WHAT?! ARE YOU COMPLETELY INSANE?!
Nin: Why, yes I am.
Dee: facefault And what's up with this stupid background? It has nothing to do with either series...unless you count Ryoga.
Nin: Oh, no. This background was not meant to poke fun at the poor, directionally challenged young man.
Dee: Then what is it for?
Nin: I'm trying to find my way back to the land of sanity. I thought that staring at compasses for hours on end would help me out.
Dee: Nin, with your luck, you'll probably just end up getting lost in the land of INSANITY.
Nin: Oh, didn't I tell you? I already AM lost in the land of insanity. Why did you think I wrote this in the first place?
Dee: I gathered that. Hey, wait, what am I doing here?
Nin: Oh, my... Should I spell it out?
Dee: I AM NOT INSANE!!!
Nin: Oh, dear, the poor girl is in denial...
Dee: I AM NOT IN DENIAL!!!
Nin: She's denying that she's in denial. This is pretty serious. This is a job for...the Men in White!
(Several Men in White appear, and drag Dee off in a straight jacket)
Dee: (offscreen) I AM NOT INSANE!!! IT'S HER, I TELL YOU!!! HER!!!
Nin: Oh, dear. Now who will bring me back to the land of sanity? Oh, well. I guess I'll just have to enjoy myself while I'm here...MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
(The scene fades out as Nin continues to cackle madly)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gundam 1/2
by
Nin Tendo
Prologue
~ Disclaimer ~ I don't own Gundam Wing or Ranma 1/2, I'm just temporarily insane!!!
WARNING! Everyone who's in this fic will be OOC and bashed at some point.
Duo happily polished his new car. (After Deathsythe self-detonated, his interests had turned to the more traditional masculine hobbies) It was a great day on Earth. The sun was shining, the sky was clear, and the slight breeze reminded him of a small child, tugging his clothes, shouting, "Come and play with me!"
And then the enexpected happened. Something so horrible, so terrible, so totally FREAKY, that Duo froze in complete terror!!!
"DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU~~~~~~~~OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~~~~~!!!!!!!!!
Duo looked around, frantically, searching for an escape route. His instncts screamed at him, telling him to flee, run away, before he was delivered a fate worse than death itself!!!
However, there was no place to run, no place to hide.
Nin had another fanfic idea.
Duo tried to get away, but Nin grabbed his braid first. Duo cried out in pain.
"Hey, Duo!" Nin chirped. "I got another idea, and guess what?"
"...What?" Duo said, his curiousity getting the better of him. He tried to not let the foreboding get to him. Nin could have actually thought up a GOOD fic.
As if!
"You're the protagonist!" Nin shrieked.
"Protagonist...?" Duo asked. "Isn't that the character that the conflict revolves around?"
Nin chuckled a little hesitantely. "It's a...love story. What really happens in a love story? Guy falls for Girl, Girl falls for Guy, Guy and Girl defeat the obstacles to their love, and live happily ever after!" (A/N: Heh....n_n)
Duo's eyes narrowed. "You're gonna make me take part in a CHICK FLIC?!"
Nin cowered in fear. "It's not a chick flic, I SWEAR!"
"Then what is it?"
"A fusion with Ranma 1/2."
"What the hell is Ranma 1/2?"
"...A love story?"
Duo glowered.
"Okay, look," Nin surrendered, "I'm not gonna throw you into another universe. It's just gonna be a play. You guys all need to lighten up a bit. Here's a picture of the guy that you get to act out." She held up a picture of a guy with a braid like Duo's, except it was black, really short and tight, and his eyes were a gray/blue.
Duo snorted. "This guy doesn't look like me at all! Why don't you get Wufei to do it?"
Nin started bawling. "I tried Wufei already!!! Look what he did to my arm!!!" She held up her arm, showing off a tiny scratch.
Duo sweat-dropped. "Give me one good reason to agree with this."
"You get nude scenes with Hilde."
"You've got yourself an actor!!!" Duo shouted, a little too early.
=======================================================================================
"Tell me again why we're all here, Hilde?" Relena asked.
"Uh...Nin told me that we all needed to havesome fun once in a while, so we're acting out a manga series in play form," Hilde answered. 'And she promised nude series with Duo if I managed to convince everyone to come," she added, mentally.
"What manga series is it?" Quatre asked, feeling apprehensive.
Hilde probed her memory for the answer. It was on the tip of her tongue... "It had a really weird title....it had a fraction in it, I think."
"Ranma 1/2?" Trowa supplied, holding back a grin. He had read the manga befoe, and knew what it was about.
"Yeah, that's it!" Hilde exclaimed. "We're gonna have a lot of fun, aren't we, guys?"
Trowa and Heero smirked at each other. Heero had read the manga, too.
"I have a bad feeling about this..." Catherine said, staring at Trowa's grin suspiciously.
"I'll be happy as long as there are battles," Dorothy announced.
"Oh, you'll be happy, Dorothy," Heero cracked. He and Trowa started to chuckle underneath their breatth.
Everyone stared at the two, as if they had suddenly transformed into alien beings...which they kinda did. OOC aliens must have taken over their bodies, I suppose....
Wufei snorted. "I don't know why this stupid woman brought me here, but it's not worth my time."
Sally giggled. "Oh, you know why you came, Wufei..." She winked at him.
Wufei blushed, and everyone else stared at him, sweatdropping.
"Oh, well," Noin said, poking Zechs in the ribs, "at least we have a vacation from the Terra-forming project, eh, Zechs?"
Zechs snorted. "If you could call it a vacation," he said, glaring at Heero, who was standing too close to Relena. In his opinion, anyway.
Noin sighed. "Lighten up, Zechs. You're stressing yourself out."
Heero noticed Zechs's glare, and smirked. He leaned over and whispered something into Relena's ear. She looked at her brother's expression, and giggled.
Zechs's blood began to boil.
Noin chuckled, then started to massage Zechs's shoulders, trying to calm him down.
Suddenly, the door burst open, and Nin entered, followed by Duo. "We~~~~'re~~~~ he~~~~re~~~~!!!!" Nin shrieked. Everyone covered their ears. A window shattered.
"Nin's on another of her infamous sugar highs," Catherine said, removing her hands from her ears. Everyone nodded, except Nin, who frowned.
"It's not my fault that all the sugar I eat explodes through my system at 10:00 pm!!!" Nin shouted, explaining her rather...bizarre...condition.
Everyone stared at Nin as if she was crazy. (Which she was...lol)
"It's true!!!" Nin claimed.
"Yeah, right," everyone else muttered.
Nin did a terrible impression of Heero's Death Glare (tm). When she saw that it didn't affect anyone, she sighed, and continued. "Well, now that we're all here--"
"Where are we, anyway?" Lady Une asked, looking at all the strange looking scenery and props.
"A theatre," Nin answered, annoyed at being interrupted. "Anywa, now that we're all here, I can assign parts!!!"
"Yea. Woo hoo," the Gundam people said, bored.
Nin glared at everyone. "Okay, since there are a LOT of characters in Ranma 1/2, some of you will have to act out multiple parts. I'll also be bringing some people back to life."
"You can do that?" asked Duo.
"Yeah!" Nin said, proud. "I can also kill people off! Wanna see?"
Duo rolled his eyes. "Yeah, right. You'd probably mess up, and kill YOURSELF!" He laughed.
Duo dies.
Everyone gasps.
Duo comes back to life.
Everyone gasps.
"Cool!" Duo said. "I had a tea party with Shinigami!!!"
"Any questions?"
~Silence...~
"Alrighty then!" Nin brings Trieze and the mad scientists back to life.
"TRIEZE-SAMA!!!!!" Lady Une cried, glomping Trieze. Trieze passes out from lack of air. And so, Trieze's first memory of his new life was falling asleep.
"Damn," Professor G said. "I almost talked that cute demon into giving me a foot massage."
"There!" Nin cried out, in joy. "All done! Here's everyone's roles! The people playing multiple minor characters are labelled as 'extra'!" she said, pinning a sheet of paper on the wall.
~~~
Who plays who:
Duo: Ranma, 'Ranko'
Hilde: Akane
Heero: Ryoga
Relena: Kodachi, Akari
Trowa: Mousse
Quatre: Extra
Catherine: Ukyo
Dorothy: Shampoo
Noin: Nabiki, Mariko
Lady Une: Kasumi
Treize: Dr. Tofu
Master O: Genma
Dr. J: Cologne
Professor G: Happosai
Instructor H: Soun
Doktor S: The little old lady across the street, Extra
Zechs: Tatewaki
Wufei: Pantyhose
Sally: Extra
Have a nice day! n_n
~~~
Heero's eyes widened. (Damn those OOC aliens!!!) "Relena plays KODACHI?!" he shouted, in a very OOC fashion.
"You're INSANE, Nin!" Trowa accused.
"I know...." Nin said, smirking, "and so is Kodachi!"
"I thought you supported me!" Relena cried, assuming (correctly) that she had to act out an insane person.
"I do!" Nin said, confused. "That's why you play Akari!"
"But, why Kodachi? Wouldn't Dorothy be better?" Heero growled.
"I toyed with that idea," Nin answered, "but Shampoo would suit Dorothy so much better, and she can't be both, because they sometimes appear in the same scene. I mean, really! Can you see RELENA playing Shampoo?"
Heero doesn't know if he should growl or drool at the though of Relena playing Shampoo.
"Don't worry," Nin whispered, so only Heero would hear. "You still get to see her in that skin-tight leotard!" (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)
Heero drooled, then growled when he realized hat everyone else would see her in the leotard, too.
"Why do I play an old woman?" Doktor S asked, fuming.
"You're not alone," Nin answered, gigging, staring at Dr. J.
'Why is she looking at me?' Dr. J thought, chills running down his spine.
"INJUSTICE!!!" Wufei screamed.
"What is it, Wufei?" Nin asked, still pissed off at him for cutting her arm.
"Oh, Wufei's just angry that he acts out a guy named after a woman's undergarment," Sally explained.
"Bwahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!" Nin laughed, manically, then tried to look innocent.
'Yeah, right,' everyone else thought.
"Hey, who's 'Ranko'?" Duo asked. "You told me that I play Rama, not this 'Ranko' person!"
Nin hid a bucket behind her back, and walked toward him. "Oh, Ranma and 'Ranko' are the same person..." She smiles evilly.
"Oh. A split personality, you mean?" Duo asked, oblivious to his impending doom.
Heero and Trowa noticed, but they just smirked. Then they realized that they would have the same fate, and made themselves scarce. (They hid behind Relena and Catherine. n_n)
"A split personality? Um...yes, that's it," Nin lied.
"Cool!" Duo shouted, happy that he got an interesting part.
Nin splashed Duo with the water in the bucket.
"Cold!" Duo shouted, in a voice a few octaves higher than normal.
Everyone stared at Duo. He was shorter than usual, his hair was bright read, his eyes were bright blue, and his face was more delicate looking.
He was also female.
"Gyaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!" Duo screamed, in a high, girly voice, looking down his shirt.
While everyone was occupied with Duo's transformation, Nin splashed Master O with another bucket. He became a panda.
"Growf," said Master O.
"What the hell is this?!" Duo screamed, paralized with shock.
"Insurance," Nin answered. "I'll give you the cure after the play is finished, but only AFTER the play is finished!"
"You PSYCHO!!!" Duo screamed, tackling Nin, and pounding the crap out of her.
"Yes, that's it! Get into character!" Nin said, between blows.
(One hour later)
After nearly getting killed at Duo's hands, Nin finally decided to go ahead and tell Duo that he just needed to splah himself with hot water to rejoin the male gender.
Duo and Master O left to take a shower.
Nin neglected to tell them that their cursed forms were permanent, triggered by cold water. Hot water was only a temporary cure.
Somehow, Nin miraculously healed from her wounds. Maybe the OOC aliens have possessed her, too.
"Why am I Ryoga?" Heero asked.
"Because you're always angry and/or depressed, and in Endless Waltz, you said, 'I've been lost ever since the day I was born'!" Nin answered.
"I didn't mean it literally..." Heero grumbled.
"I suppose I'm Mousse, because I work in the circus?" Trowa guessed.
"Yup! It's even the knife throwing act, too! Ain't that a coinicidence? Except now you get to be the one who throws the knives!" Nin replied.
"You're lucky that I'm a good actor," Trowa grumbled, "because no one in their right mind would obsess over DOROTHY."
"I resent that remark," Quatre grumbled underneath his breath.
"Mousse is actually pretty stotic when he's not raving about Shampoo," Nin offered.
"But I'm not blind!" Trowa protested.
"You might as well be," Nin replied, pointing at his uni-bang. "Oh! I almost forgot! I have to do all you guys's hair!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~~~~~~!!!!" everyone screamed.
Nin pouted. "Fine."
Everyone else sighed in relief.
"Well, I guess that's it for today. OH! I almost forgot! To minimize confusion, I'll be using the G-people's names instead of the Ranma names. ...Except for Wufei, who will be called 'Pantyhose Wufei'!!! Bwahahahaha!!!!!"
"Then what was the use of the role list? You're probably just going to confuse people even MORE. What if they get hooked on Ranma 1/2 through you, and they decide to watc/read it? Wouldn't they get confused about the names?" Noin asked.
Nin paused, then said, "That's not MY problem!!!"
"What a nice person," Hilde mocked, quietly, so Nin wouldn't hear, and kill her off.
Author's Notes:
1. Yes, everyone is going to be OOC and bashed at some point in the story. There's not going to be any special treatment!!! No, I don't want ANY remarks about OOC or character bashing! I bash myself the worst! Isn't that enough?
2. There's this quote that goes something like: "Blessed are those who laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused." HELL, YES! n_n
3. Oh, and a note on alternate forms...Duo will be known as Duo-onna, Master O as O-panda, ect. (I'll think up something for everyone else when the time comes...)
4. I give you permission to flame me for this. This fic screams, "FLAME ME", so I won't scream it myself. Just don't flame about OOCness or character bashing, or you will be included in the next chapter. (Heh)