Disclaimer: All characters belong to J.K. Rowling
Claimer: Poem at the end belongs to me. Please ask if you want to use it…
The year started out the same. The sorting, then the feast, then going to bed. Except. Except that this year was going to be different.
Yes. This year, despite Sammy's fervent protests, she was going to ignore Potter. Yes, it's the perfect plan. I mean, he couldn't possibly be as mean and such a jerk as he was last year, right? Right?!
Right.
Convincing herself, Lily decided, was relatively easy. It was the carrying out that was so hard. She was Head Girl. He was Head Boy. In the muggle world, it would be like the Star Quarterback and the Cheerleading Girl. After all, Arthur and Molly Weasley had been head's the year before, and their engagement had just been printed in the Daily Prophet. Lily liked Molly, though they had never really talked. But anyway, Lily was going to ignore James this year, as far as she could without the duties bothering her. Yessiree, she was going to –
"Heya Lily! Congrats on being Head Girl. I'm Head Boy, you know."
Lily thinned her lips, something she had learnt unconsciously from Petunia, and said nothing.
"Lily? Lily, don't do that. You're not pretty enough when you do that. Don't you think Padfoot?"
Sirius appeared out of nowhere and started poking fun at Lily.
Lily just ignored them and trotted upstairs.
The next 4 months passed usually. Surprisingly enough, Lily had managed to keep her vow, and was ignoring James as much as she could. She had her reasons. Then, it was all ruined.
"Hey Lily? Dumbledore wants to see us."
James, who knew the way off by heart to Dumbledore's gargoyle, led the way, a confused Lily following him.
After the password had been spoken, and the spiraling staircase climbed, James pushed open the door and walked in. Lily shut the door behind her.
Dumbledore was already sitting at his desk, smiling at the two of them.
"Ah, Miss Evans, Mr Potter…. Yes.. Down to business. The Christmas Ball is being held this year, and it is tradition for the head's to partner up for the first dance." He took in Lily's horrified stare and James' incredulous look and continued. "I know there has been some … tension between you in the past, but it is to be hoped that you can put it aside for the first three dances of the ball."
"Only three?" the relief in Lily's voice surprised all three of them, and James winced internally. He hadn't made her hurt that bad, had he?
"Yes Miss Evans, only three. You may go."
Silently, they left. And silently, they made their way back to their dorm. And then, still silently sat in front of the fire, obstinately staring into it.
Lily was determined not to let him hurt her again. Then, not being able to stand it any longer, she took off to bed. Still silently.
::"Oh Lil, Lil, you're so weird."
"I learnt it from the best."
"Indeed you did. Let's go."
"Where to?" She would follow him anywhere, they both knew it.
"To… somewhere."::
It had started simply enough, Lily told herself as she ignored the silent tears that were sliding down her face. Yes. It had been perfect, until, 3 weeks into it, she had blurted out three words. Three little words that could change someone's life, for better or for worse. Her change, when she had said them, had been for the worse.
She had planned it out, ever since she was a little girl. First, she would say them. Then he would say them back. Then they'd kiss, and live happily ever after. Never, she was sure, would he tell her that he wasn't ready. That he needed some space, that he couldn't love her like that…yet.
But, unfortunately, she had run out before he had said yet. So she hadn't heard him.
He had tried to talk to her for days, weeks, even a few more months after this, but each time, she had just responded politely, giving him no more of a glance than a pretty girl would give to Severus Snape. And it had insulted, and hurt him. He gave up. He had been scared, she had told him in a rough, brash way, and he hadn't been prepared. So the words had spilt out before he could have stopped them. Like he half wanted to. Love hurt, he told himself firmly, refusing to be dragged down by it. So, he had acted normal – as normal as you can get when your heart had been broken without you knowing you had given it. Sirius and Remus knew. They didn't pressure him, knew he would talk about it when he was ready, and he had. Just spilled it out to them over a midnight feast when Peter and Frank were in the infirmatory. They had both been serious. And they had noticed Lily had been acting strangely too. So, they would just give significant glances to each other, knowing that love would pull James and Lily through, but not sure about it, and desperately hoping that it would.
The big day of the ball finally arrived, and all the girls were squeaking with excitement and fear, and all the boys were acting macho on top of sweaty hands and nervous glances towards the window. However, when their dates came down the stairs, or they left to meet their dates (usually a friend came as well to ensure that they wouldn't try to bolt) their mouths dried up, and they became the picture of shyness. Then their dates would giggle at them kindly, and they'd smile back, and they'd float for the rest of the evening.
James was waiting impatiently at the bottom of the stairs, entertaining the equation of how far he could run before Dumbledore would know. He gave up. It would be way too fast to do something about it anyway. Sirius and Sammy had left together, giggling and joking about all the other couples. Remus had gone to find his date, set up for him by James. She was a pretty girl, quite shy and in Ravenclaw. Now, he just had to wait for his date.
Looking impatiently at his watch, and then running a distracted hand through his hair, he looked up again and caught sight of Lily, who was coming down. Then, his mouth dried up, his eyes glazed over, and he wondered if he was dreaming.
Lily was wearing pale violet robes, made from silk, that set of her hair fantastically, which was weird, because usually violet didn't. Not really. Dangling from her ears were long, long emeralds, which ended just below her jaw line. Her hair was twisted up, with a few tendrils here and there to say, "I didn't spend too much time on this, but don't I look pretty?" She felt pretty, and she knew that the hour she had spent on her hair made her look devastatingly beautiful. So she wasn't surprised at James' expression. No, rather, she felt it was her reward. If any guy hadn't looked at her like that, by god, she would lower him to that standard. No, rather, what she did feel surprised at, was that there was no hurt when she saw James' face glaze over, like it had on their first few dates. Instead, and probably the thing that surprised her most, was that there was a faint flutter of hope…. deep inside her.
"Presenting, Witches and Wizards, your Head Boy and Girl!"
The voice boomed out over the crowd, and a magic spotlight (magicked to shine
on anyone snogging by a certain Mr Black) shone down on James and Lily. It then
immediately switched to a Ravenclaw-Hufflepuff couple, happily oblivious to the
laughs of the crowd and the curses of the DJ.
Dumbledore, smiling indulgently, waved his wand, and the spotlight moved back to where Lily and James were standing stock still and stiffly, not touching at all.
"And, the first song will be Can You Get Enchanted, the latest by the Mad Dashers!! And opening the ball, will be your head couple!"
The crowd cheered, the DJ grinned, Remus and Sirius stared at each other worriedly, and the "Head Couple" made no move towards each other.
"Um… Heads? Would you like to open the ball now?" the DJ prompted.
They just stared at each other, and then stiffly started to dance, moving to the fast beat, the rhythm pounding in their ears and surging up through their feet. Getting into the swing of things only took a few more seconds; they both loved good music, both fast and slow.
"Ah…The ball is now open, witches and wizards…" the DJ murmured. He didn't want to distract the couple, fearing they would stop again.
The first fast one passed quickly, letting the second fast
one come on. Lily felt a faint feeling of despair. Nothing had happened yet. He
was avoiding her eyes. The second passed too fast for Lily, and too slowly for
James. He wanted it over and done with; to be able to separate himself from
Lily and the feelings that she brought him.
The third song was a cunningly placed slow song.
"And now, witches and wizards, by request, we have our first slow song!"
The whoops and cheers sounded, and both Lily and James avoided each other's eyes. The DJ continued "And since this is the last dance our heads have to open, this is also the last song I will be announcing. Unless, of course, there's a lucky witch or wizard out there who wants to make a dedication! Anyway, this is Lost In Your Eyes, by Debbie Gibson, a talented young witch."
There were louder cheers that shut up as the first soft notes began to play.
Gulping, James took Lily in his arms, keeping her as far away as the eyes watching them would permit. Which wasn't far enough.
She was looking at him. Looking at him, with those emerald green eyes that had made him fall for her in the first place.
'No, James. Don't go there.' He told himself sternly, but he held her a bit tighter.
Lily was shocked. She knew she still loved him, had known it for the past year. But. Never had she realized that it would all come rushing back. She leant a bit closer to him. "Jamesee?" The unconscious use of her nickname for him went unnoticed by both.
"Mm?"
"Why did you do it?"
He didn't need to ask what she meant. He held her closer.
"I was scared."
"Of what?"
He shrugged, partly because he didn't know, and partly because his shoulders were feeling peculiarly stiff. Without thinking, she slid her hands up and started massaging them.
"Of it all, I guess."
"Jamesee..I wouldn't have hurt you.."
"That's not it."
"Then what is it?"
"Oh, I don't know. The risk, the pain, the overwhelming joy and terror of it
all, any of the above and more."
"James…"
He looked down at her, at her emerald eyes, at her face framed by a few red strands of hair, done up in that I-didn't-spend-any-time-on-this way.
"James, we're nothing without each other. Didn't you feel empty this past year? We belong together, James."
"I know Lil, but it's just so …"
"Come on James. It'd be wrong if you weren't scared. This is your last chance, I'm not going to cry over you again. Take a chance on me, come on James. I love you."
With that, she leant up, and captured his lips with hers. And when he responded, it was perfect. Despite the blinding light shining on them. (AN: The Return of the Blinding Spotlight in a theatre near you!) In fact, the light made it seem more real…
They pulled apart slowly and he opened his eyes.
"I love you James."
"I love you too, Lil. I'm sorry I was such an idiot."
"Aren't we all…"
"All what?"
"Sorry that you're an idiot."
He laughed. Lily, the real Lily, was back.
As the spotlight shone down on the couple, Sirius and Remus grinned at eachother. They suspected a lot of mush over the next few years.
Take a chance, roll the dice
Come with me
And you will see
That we are meant to be together.
If, however, you refuse,
I will drag my heart away
And a proper burial will I give
For it is not just me that will suffer
But you as well
So if only you could see
That we go together, you and me
Alone we are nothing
Pitiful people in a big world
Not noticeable
But together we can rule it all
And be happy.
So come with me,
And you will see
That we are meant to be together
For all who know
Will agree
That we go great together
Me with you
And you with me
And then we'll both be
Happy
So take a chance,
And roll the dice.
Come with me
And you will see
That we are meant to be together.
AN: Whoo!! I like this poem…it's one of my better ones O.o; Anyway, I dunno. How did you like this story? Once again, I've seen better, but I've also seen worse. And, if this wasn't mushy enough, I'm sorry =P If it was too mushy, well then, there was the warning in the summary O.o;
Anyway, next chapter of Christmas Shopping should be out by Monday, cause it's a holiday!!!! And then the next week its thanksgiving…I'm so happy …. Anyway, please review! Cheers and white ferrets!! ^^