W h a t T h
e H e a r t L e a v e s B e h i n d
B y A b i l
e n e K e e g a n
~ 2 ~
Luka stormed through the
door and down the stairs leaving Abby on the roof alone. A part of him was still worried she might
actually jump but mostly his heart had already numbed too much to care anymore. He tried desperately to control his emotions
as he walked back into the ER. He
failed miserably.
"Luka." He swung around and faced the unsuspecting doctor.
"What?" Luka barked loudly at Malucci who stopped dead in his tracks and stared
at him uncertainly. That was a first,
Luka thought to himself, Dave Malucci speechless.
"There, um, is an MVA coming in." Luka wondered if he had spoken the word that
harshly or if the young doctor could actually feel the rage coming off
him. Most likely the later was true.
"Is it major?" He asked ruthlessly.
"Um minor, I believe." If Luka weren't in a total rage at the moment he'd be laughing at
Dave's scared demeanor.
"How many?"
"Only one." Luka looked at him fumingly. One!
"Did you go to medical school Malucci?"
"Ah yeah." By now Luka noticed patients and other staff members watching the ordeal
between the two doctors. He didn't
care.
"Six years?" Malucci only nodded. "And
you graduated?" Another nod. Luka began walking away and towards the
lounge. "Then you figure it
out!" He called behind him as he
entered the lounge slamming the door shut.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
On the roof Abby was still
crying. She was trying desperately to
figure out a way to pull her life back together. To get over this pain. Only problem was it wasn't just her life. It was Luka's as well. She hadn't just shattered the pieces of her own world. She'd shattered the pieces of his also. She sank to the ground and pulled her legs
up to her chest hugging them tightly. She felt the coldness of the brick wall against her back as it seeped
through her clothing. Abby knew that
the wall was the only barrier keeping her from tumbling many stories down to
her death. She thought it humorous really. A person trying to commit suicide in the one
place they'd have the most chance of saving you. But they wouldn't be able to save her. No doubt they'd try. But
they'd never succeed. She began wishing
the wall would give way and just kill her itself.
She still couldn't believe she'd done it. She'd gone there to talk with Carter. She wasn't sure why she'd even done
that. Or maybe she was. The answers were all in her head she was
sure of it. She just wasn't ready to
face them. Or at least to think about
them. All she wanted was to go back in
time and change the mistake that had cost her a life of happiness. A life with Luka. She wondered if this is why H.G. Wells had written The Time
Machine. Had he really just wanted
to travel back in time to find a love he'd thrown away? She couldn't imagine that the prospect of
seeing the future was greater then the prospect of retreating a moment in the
past where your entire life fell apart.
She wanted that moment back. She wanted Luka back.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Luka sank to the couch and
buried his face in his hands. His
emotions were a mixture of rage and grief, almost like his heart couldn't
decide which sentiment to fall back on. Perhaps it was better that way. An equal balance of two emotions. Only a single emotion to dwell on might very well destroy him.
It was still hard for him to believe that this was
happening. It was something he'd never
have predicted from Abby. She'd spent
many nights alone since they'd been together. Not one of those nights had it ever occurred to Luka that she might not
really be alone. There was no reason
for him to think that. He'd trusted her
with all his heart. No matter how much
time she may have spent with Carter Luka had always trusted it would never go
beyond friendship. At least not as long
as she was still seeing him. The
thought of her sleeping with Carter made him feel physically ill.
Luka could hear the sirens of the oncoming ambulance as it
approached the hospital. He knew he had
to get back out there. As much as he
wanted nothing more then to simply leave this hospital behind, memories of Abby
and all, he knew he couldn't. He had a
career here and people that depended on him. Sighing he stood up from the couch. At that same moment the door to the lounge opened and, to Luka's
surprise and equal rage, Carter walked in.
He watched Carter as Carter watched him. Clearly neither were sure how to react to
this situation. Luka wondered whether
or not Carter even knew that Abby had spoken to him. That she'd told him all about their little affair.
"Um, hi Luka." That was all it took. Luka
plunged at Carter and threw him up against the wall. He punched him as hard as he could in the jaw before punching him
just as hard in the stomach. The man
doubled over in pain. Luka didn't feel
any better. He was about to go after
him again when he felt somebody trying to pull him back.
"Luka stop!" Luka stopped immediately and looked over at Kerry. Out of all the people that could have walked
into that room it had to be the ER chief. Before she could say anything to him or question what had just happened
Luka stormed out of the room and then out of the hospital. He didn't care anymore that he had a job to
do. He just had to get out of there.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"He just hit you?" Abby asked Carter as she paced back and
force through the lounge. She supposed
she wasn't too surprised to hear that Luka had attacked Carter. She should have expected it.
"Yeah, he just hit me." Was Carters angry reply as he sat attending to his swollen jaw
with a wet cloth and some ice. Abby stopped
pacing and stood in front of him. He
wasn't too hurt, Abby knew it could be worse.
"You didn't do anything to provoke him? Didn't say anything?" Carter looked up at her and she knew it was
a stupid question.
"Like he didn't already have enough provoking him." Abby sighed and sat down on the chair across
from her friend. At least she hoped he
was still her friend. Though she doubted
they would be for very long.
"What did you tell Kerry?" She was very worried of how the hospital
staff was going to react to this. She
knew Luka was now in a lot of trouble as far as his position at the hospital
went. Hitting a coworker was not
something to be taken lightly. She felt
terrible, this was all her fault. If
she had any more tears left to cry she was certain she'd be bawling right now.
"I didn't tell her anything Abby." His voice was a little softer now. "Why the hell didn't you tell me that
you were going to tell Luka about us?" Abby just stared at him blankly for a moment. Oh God, didn't he know.
"Us? John
there is no us. I thought I'd explained
this all to you this morning."
"Actually you didn't explain very much at
all." He was angry now, she could
hear it in his voice. But he was also
hurt.
"John it was a mistake and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I went to you last night, I
shouldn't have." He looked at her
with hate reflected in his eyes. Abby
had to look away and so she found herself staring at the floor. "I love Luka. I can't be with you John."
Abby stood up and walked out of the lounge. She knew she had just broken yet another
mans heart. Right now though all that
was important to her was trying to help Luka. She had to find Kerry.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
...the next day...
Luka stormed out of the
room and down the hall. It certainly
hadn't taken them much time to decide what should be done with him. In truth he neither blamed them nor did he
really care. He was just glad that it
was over with and that their deliberations really hadn't taken very long.
"Luka." He heard Kerry call from behind him but he just kept on walking. The least he could do was pretend like he
was mad. "Luka." Kerry was a few strides behind him. "Abby told me what happened and it did
help our decision." He stopped and
looked down at her in astonishment.
"Abby told you." He winced at the sound her name had on his own lips. He made a mental note never to say it again.
"Yes, she told us. Things could have been a lot worse for you if she hadn't." Luka was very surprised that Abby would not
only risk her own reputation at the hospital but her beloved Carters as well. He chose not to comment on this though and
continued walking down the hall. To his
relief Kerry chose not follow him this time.
As he headed towards the exit he wasn't sure where he would
go or what he would do from here. He
was just glad to finally be able to leave this place behind. If only for a short while.
"Luka." He ignored her all together as he walked towards the emergency doors. "Luka please tell me what
happened?" Luka figured it
couldn't hurt. Besides maybe she'd actually
feel guilty about it. Maybe it would
cause her some more pain. He didn't see
why he should be the only one feeling pain when it was her who'd done this all
in the first place.
"I've been suspended." With that he walked through the doors and out into the ambulance
bay.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
End of Chapter 2
Author's Note: Although I started this series a while ago this is
all I've been able to come up with thus far. The rest is still being worked out in my head so please be patient with me
as I write up the new Chapters. The
good news is that I pretty much have it all worked out in my head so it
shouldn't take too long for me to write it down. The bad news is that I'm currently writing another series (or is
this good news also) that just won't leave my head so I've got to get it
written too. So much to do, so little
time to do it. :) I may be posting parts of that other series
soon, so keep an eye out if you're interested.
Disclaimer: The following is a story of fiction
based on characters created and owned by Michael Crichton and NBC.