Title: I Am
Author: Satsuki Kitsune
Category: angst
Rating: PG… I guess there's blood…
Pairings: none mentioned.
Warnings: not much, really… just blood, person wanting to die, angst… you know
the drill…
Disclaimer: Gundam Wing characters and universe are the property of the
copyright owners. I don't make any money, I swear!!!
Feedback: Any and all comments and feedback is welcome!!! Please??
Notes: alright… this is just a side-story or prequel, is you will, to my other fic,
Silence and the Soldier. I just got bored with what I was doing and decided to
write something different… and here it is.
I am Heero Yuy. Everyone
wants me, but for different reasons. As I run, I remember that my own name is
merely stolen, from some political martyr who fought the never-ending battle
for peace. And lost. I have no right to call myself the righteous name, but I
must. It is my code name for the mission, to carry out Operation Meteor. Deep
inside I believe that I am staining the name with my blood. It is my blood,
but not my peace.
My
stolen code name means different things for many people. The colonies: a name
with the shield of peace that war broke and dominated. OZ: the legacy of people
who dared to oppose their and the Alliance's powerful tyranny upon the
colonies. And to the Gundam pilots: a fellow pilot who never wanted or needed
their help, a machine-like human with no emotions. This is me.
Life
is war. War is life. The endless cycle of life floods through my head. Have I
known anything else? With adrenaline pumping through my veins I sprint through
the alleys and faceless streets, my opponent hot on my heels. I can feel its
icy breath upon my body and I shiver, from a strange tingle at the back of my
neck. Why was I so cold?
The
cold invades my inhuman senses as I realize that I am not running at all. I
stand, high on the platform of my open cockpit. The temperature radiates from
my head to my clammy fingers, clutching the self-destruction device. I hold it,
pondering what I am about to do. I am about to end my life of suffering, pain,
and dedication to only one cause: war. I was doing the right thing,
wasn't I?
The breeze
ruffled my short, boyish dark brown hair. I stood there, emotionless as always,
about to commit suicide for my cause. I could not let OZ get my
Gundam… I would never surrender myself to them, or my mobile suit. Death
first, I thought. Deep inside my cockpit, I could hear the voices of my
partners, no, adversaries, try to reach my dead connection. I had closed
it off to the outside world as I stepped out and into my fate.
All through
my years, I have had no other life than a soldier's. I can't remember anything
before the insane Dr. J, who trained me from when I was very young. I was
subjected to every kind of torture imaginable every single week, and the next I
would start all over. Before the age of eight, I had lost every bit of my
humanity. I forgot how to cry, feel sadness or anger, and even pain was a
foreign feeling to me, for I had learned to block it from my mind. My
haunted, cursed mind of a soldier.
Reverting
back to the present, I brought up the self-destruction device slowly. I stared
at it impassively, welcoming and wondering what it would bring. In living, I
have always wished to leave this pain-filled world and escape to something
hopefully better. I suppressed the urge to let emotion play on my face as I
realized exactly why I was so cold. The bitter pain and bliss of death flowed
through my body as I realized how close to it I really was. Just a little
closer…
Mission
Accepted, I said, more to myself than anyone. I was done. No more fighting,
not more wars, just peaceful oblivion. The force of the explosion obliterated
my mobile suit as I was thrown to the ground along with shards from the Gundam.
Am I dead
now? Is this what it means…? To be lying, broken and bleeding on the ground? My
dark Prussian eyes dulled over as I stared into nothingness, blood pooling
around my head. Is everything alright now?
-end-
Author's Note: awww…. *straightens up* anyways… please review and tell me what
you think. I know it was really short, but its just a short little prelude to
S&S. And, for those who are wondering, the next part of S&S will be up
really soon… ja ne!! ^_~
