Title: MSU No Gakusei-Tachi Part 4: The Trouble With Floor Meetings
or CATA is a Crack Whore
Author: Kimiko
Genre: Parody/humor, fluff, sap, AU
Warnings: Future lime?, silliness, OOC, bastard!J, yaoi, yuri, subtle self-
insert
Pairings: 1x2, 4x3, 5+Meiran, 13x6, DorothyxRelena, Catherine+Hirde,
SallyxNoin
Disclaimers: The boyz and grrrlz belong to Sunrise and Bandai and any
other rich people who hold a claim to them, all of whom should refrain
from suing a starving college student. I don't make any money from
writing fan fiction - pardon me while I die laughing at the very thought.
Feedback: Please! I need to know if I should continue posting this fic as it
evolves!
Archive: Anywhere at all. (Darkflame, are you listening?) Please let me
know! I'm posting it on my website as well, so g'head and check there if
you've missed parts.
Warnings for PART 4: CATA does not belong to me, thank every god and
all the Fates (those would be Clotho, Lachesis and Atropos; see, I'm not
totally ignorant). CATA is the evil bus system of the greater Lansing area.
Okay, so it's normally not too bad, but – well, the only thing I can tell you
without spoiling the plot is that Quatre's evening is based on a true story.
The term "Resident Mentor" belongs to the University; until this year it
was "Resident Assistant", like any normal person would expect. Song
Callahan is really me; it's one of my old aliases. Her/my roommate
belongs to herself, although her name is not really Anna. I belong to my
muse Kuroneko and to the voices in my head.
~TSUZUKU~
The trouble with floor meetings is that you can never get to them on time
if you have a night class that day.
Quatre had been looking forward to his REL 205 class all week; he had
managed, somehow, to find the obscure, not-required texts at the library,
and he was all set to blow his professor away with his knowledge and
dedication. The class went well. The lecture was engaging, the professor
humorous as well as knowledgeable and intelligent; everything appeared
to be going as planned. And since the class ended at 8:50, Quatre figured
he could easily make it back to Hubbard for the floor meeting at 9:00.
This was, however, not the case.
**************
"Hey Trowa, where's your boyfriend?" Duo demanded cheekily, lounging
catlike on the ratty carpet of 3 North Hubbard's community room. "Didn't
he say he'd be back from class in time?"
"He did," Trowa mused. "I wonder what's keeping him."
"Maybe his libido got to be too much for him, and he's off fucking some
other guy in a closet somewhere," Duo teased. "Ow," he continued, as the
empty pop bottle Wufei had thrown bounced off his skull.
"Oh, leave him alone, Wufei," said Trowa without much enthusiasm.
"He's just being an ass, as usual."
"Hey!" Duo snapped. "I'm not an ass!"
Treize Kushrenada rolled his eyes at the antics of the freshmen. "Could
you three possibly keep it down? Some of us are trying to have a floor
meeting here."
"Sorry," said Wufei and Trowa at more or less the same time, while Duo
grumbled, "Ah, fuck you, Kushrenada."
"As I was saying," Treize continued, studiously ignoring the crazy Goth,
"we need to set some community standards. This is a quiet floor, but just
what that means depends on you guys. Okay, so next week, we'll set our
standards, and that meeting will be mandatory. If you can't be there, you
need to let me know ahead of time so I can talk to you about the kind of
behavior you want to see on the floor. Okay?"
More or less everyone nodded.
"Okay." Treize scanned his clipboard thoughtfully. "Ah. Yeah, a lot of
floors make T-shirts. If you guys want to do that, we'll need to get them
ordered in the beginning of November, so I'm going to need designs by
mid-October, and we can vote on them then. I'll post a sign-up sheet on
the board."
"Sign-up sheet?" echoed Zechs Merquise – Treize's boyfriend, Wufei's
roommate, and Relena Peacecraft's stepbrother. "Come on, man – does
anyone NOT want to have the shirts?" He looked around the room.
"Some people might not be able to afford it," said Duo acidly.
Zechs raised an eyebrow. "A $10 T-shirt? That's not expensive."
Duo scowled. "Not everyone has $10," he muttered.
Treize gave Zechs a warning look. "Also," and he flipped a couple pages
on his clipboard, "I guess there have been some concerns expressed about
the fire drill on Sunday. Some of you want to know how often this will be
happening." He paused. "I don't know. They don't tell me this stuff; it's
different every year. But, you guys did a really good job of getting out and
everything, especially since we never got the chance to talk about it.
There's just one thing you guys need to be doing different."
"What?" demanded Duo, exasperated. "We got out of the fucking
building, didn't we?"
"Shut up, Maxwell," growled Wufei. "Don't piss off the Mentor."
"You need," Treize continued with a long-suffering sigh, "to knock on all
the closed doors as you leave, to make sure everybody gets out. It's just
good sense."
"Yeah, okay," said a few people.
"That's pretty much it," said Treize, "unless anyone has anything they
want us to talk about…?" No one moved. "Okay, again, mandatory
meeting next week – tell guys that weren't here, drop me a line if you
can't show."
And that was the end of Duo Maxwell's first floor meeting.
*************
At the bus stop in front of Berkey Hall, a smallish blond guy stood
waiting. He shivered in the cold; he stamped about, puffing and rubbing
his arms, trying to warm himself. His watch ticked away, passing 9:05;
and he cursed under his breath, but the bus did not appear. Quatre finally
stomped into the little bus shelter, squinting at the schedule in the dim
light. Apparently the next bus was leaving Mason/Abbot in three minutes.
He would therefore have to stand here for another eight.
*************
4 North Hubbard's residents had assembled in its tiny community room,
most of them huddled on the floor in clusters and pairs. Song Callahan and
her roommate Anna Genereaux perched on a table, listening as community
standards were discussed.
It was boring as hell.
"Okay," said Catherine Bloom, 4 North's Resident Mentor, "I think we're
all clear on that." She added a rule to the already extremely long list,
which was destined to remain posted on the bulletin board for all of the
semester. "Does anyone have anything to add?"
Song raised her hand. "Yeah, how 'bout 'The next moron who makes an
obvious rule gets her ass kicked by yours truly'?" Anna high-fived her;
Dorothy and Relena snickered.
Catherine sighed. "Fine. We're done. Next week – "
"Same time," said Dorothy, sounding bored.
"Same place," Relena added, practically yawning.
Catherine rolled her eyes. " – there will, of course, be another meeting. If
you can't make it, let me know by Wednesday afternoon, okay?"
*************
The 37-S arrived at Berkey Hall at precisely 9:12 pm. Quatre, whose
hands had begun to turn an interesting shade of blue, thanked every god of
whom he had ever heard and hastily boarded the bus. He flashed his bus
pass at the driver, headed toward the nearest seat, and flopped down
unceremoniously upon it, staring into the blackness which called itself a
window. He grinned to himself; soon he would be home.
But it was not to be.
*************
Duo grinned manically, flipping channels like a madman. He had been
doing so for the past half-hour: crouched on Trowa's beanbag chair,
Quatre's remote control firmly in hand. "This is GREAT!" he exclaimed
for perhaps the third time in the past ten minutes.
"Duo…" Trowa muttered. "Quatre might not be happy if you broke his
remote…"
Duo ignored this statement completely, off in his own happy little world
of channel-surfing, where he was King.
"Hey! Maxwell!" A well-placed pillow bounced off Duo's head, startling
him enough for him to drop the remote. Trowa dove, successfully
recovering it, and turned the station to Comedy Central, where Jon Stewart
was hosting the Daily Show.
"Ow!" Duo whinged, glaring. "Hey! What was that about, man! Can't a
guy have any fun!"
Any reply Wufei might have made was cut off, as Quatre abruptly
stumbled in the door, glaring balefully at his bus route map.
"Q-man, what took ya?" Duo asked, grinning cheekily.
"CATA," Quatre announced solemnly, the light of battle in his eyes, "is a
CRACK WHORE!"
Those present blinked, more or less in unison.
"They have two buses running the 37- and 38-S routes, right, every twenty
minutes? Yeah, okay, fine – except they switch sides at Shaw/Farm, the
rat bastards!" Quatre shouted, panting into the silence that followed.
Duo grinned. "I coulda told you that, man. Shoulda asked."
~TSUZUKU~
or CATA is a Crack Whore
Author: Kimiko
Genre: Parody/humor, fluff, sap, AU
Warnings: Future lime?, silliness, OOC, bastard!J, yaoi, yuri, subtle self-
insert
Pairings: 1x2, 4x3, 5+Meiran, 13x6, DorothyxRelena, Catherine+Hirde,
SallyxNoin
Disclaimers: The boyz and grrrlz belong to Sunrise and Bandai and any
other rich people who hold a claim to them, all of whom should refrain
from suing a starving college student. I don't make any money from
writing fan fiction - pardon me while I die laughing at the very thought.
Feedback: Please! I need to know if I should continue posting this fic as it
evolves!
Archive: Anywhere at all. (Darkflame, are you listening?) Please let me
know! I'm posting it on my website as well, so g'head and check there if
you've missed parts.
Warnings for PART 4: CATA does not belong to me, thank every god and
all the Fates (those would be Clotho, Lachesis and Atropos; see, I'm not
totally ignorant). CATA is the evil bus system of the greater Lansing area.
Okay, so it's normally not too bad, but – well, the only thing I can tell you
without spoiling the plot is that Quatre's evening is based on a true story.
The term "Resident Mentor" belongs to the University; until this year it
was "Resident Assistant", like any normal person would expect. Song
Callahan is really me; it's one of my old aliases. Her/my roommate
belongs to herself, although her name is not really Anna. I belong to my
muse Kuroneko and to the voices in my head.
~TSUZUKU~
The trouble with floor meetings is that you can never get to them on time
if you have a night class that day.
Quatre had been looking forward to his REL 205 class all week; he had
managed, somehow, to find the obscure, not-required texts at the library,
and he was all set to blow his professor away with his knowledge and
dedication. The class went well. The lecture was engaging, the professor
humorous as well as knowledgeable and intelligent; everything appeared
to be going as planned. And since the class ended at 8:50, Quatre figured
he could easily make it back to Hubbard for the floor meeting at 9:00.
This was, however, not the case.
**************
"Hey Trowa, where's your boyfriend?" Duo demanded cheekily, lounging
catlike on the ratty carpet of 3 North Hubbard's community room. "Didn't
he say he'd be back from class in time?"
"He did," Trowa mused. "I wonder what's keeping him."
"Maybe his libido got to be too much for him, and he's off fucking some
other guy in a closet somewhere," Duo teased. "Ow," he continued, as the
empty pop bottle Wufei had thrown bounced off his skull.
"Oh, leave him alone, Wufei," said Trowa without much enthusiasm.
"He's just being an ass, as usual."
"Hey!" Duo snapped. "I'm not an ass!"
Treize Kushrenada rolled his eyes at the antics of the freshmen. "Could
you three possibly keep it down? Some of us are trying to have a floor
meeting here."
"Sorry," said Wufei and Trowa at more or less the same time, while Duo
grumbled, "Ah, fuck you, Kushrenada."
"As I was saying," Treize continued, studiously ignoring the crazy Goth,
"we need to set some community standards. This is a quiet floor, but just
what that means depends on you guys. Okay, so next week, we'll set our
standards, and that meeting will be mandatory. If you can't be there, you
need to let me know ahead of time so I can talk to you about the kind of
behavior you want to see on the floor. Okay?"
More or less everyone nodded.
"Okay." Treize scanned his clipboard thoughtfully. "Ah. Yeah, a lot of
floors make T-shirts. If you guys want to do that, we'll need to get them
ordered in the beginning of November, so I'm going to need designs by
mid-October, and we can vote on them then. I'll post a sign-up sheet on
the board."
"Sign-up sheet?" echoed Zechs Merquise – Treize's boyfriend, Wufei's
roommate, and Relena Peacecraft's stepbrother. "Come on, man – does
anyone NOT want to have the shirts?" He looked around the room.
"Some people might not be able to afford it," said Duo acidly.
Zechs raised an eyebrow. "A $10 T-shirt? That's not expensive."
Duo scowled. "Not everyone has $10," he muttered.
Treize gave Zechs a warning look. "Also," and he flipped a couple pages
on his clipboard, "I guess there have been some concerns expressed about
the fire drill on Sunday. Some of you want to know how often this will be
happening." He paused. "I don't know. They don't tell me this stuff; it's
different every year. But, you guys did a really good job of getting out and
everything, especially since we never got the chance to talk about it.
There's just one thing you guys need to be doing different."
"What?" demanded Duo, exasperated. "We got out of the fucking
building, didn't we?"
"Shut up, Maxwell," growled Wufei. "Don't piss off the Mentor."
"You need," Treize continued with a long-suffering sigh, "to knock on all
the closed doors as you leave, to make sure everybody gets out. It's just
good sense."
"Yeah, okay," said a few people.
"That's pretty much it," said Treize, "unless anyone has anything they
want us to talk about…?" No one moved. "Okay, again, mandatory
meeting next week – tell guys that weren't here, drop me a line if you
can't show."
And that was the end of Duo Maxwell's first floor meeting.
*************
At the bus stop in front of Berkey Hall, a smallish blond guy stood
waiting. He shivered in the cold; he stamped about, puffing and rubbing
his arms, trying to warm himself. His watch ticked away, passing 9:05;
and he cursed under his breath, but the bus did not appear. Quatre finally
stomped into the little bus shelter, squinting at the schedule in the dim
light. Apparently the next bus was leaving Mason/Abbot in three minutes.
He would therefore have to stand here for another eight.
*************
4 North Hubbard's residents had assembled in its tiny community room,
most of them huddled on the floor in clusters and pairs. Song Callahan and
her roommate Anna Genereaux perched on a table, listening as community
standards were discussed.
It was boring as hell.
"Okay," said Catherine Bloom, 4 North's Resident Mentor, "I think we're
all clear on that." She added a rule to the already extremely long list,
which was destined to remain posted on the bulletin board for all of the
semester. "Does anyone have anything to add?"
Song raised her hand. "Yeah, how 'bout 'The next moron who makes an
obvious rule gets her ass kicked by yours truly'?" Anna high-fived her;
Dorothy and Relena snickered.
Catherine sighed. "Fine. We're done. Next week – "
"Same time," said Dorothy, sounding bored.
"Same place," Relena added, practically yawning.
Catherine rolled her eyes. " – there will, of course, be another meeting. If
you can't make it, let me know by Wednesday afternoon, okay?"
*************
The 37-S arrived at Berkey Hall at precisely 9:12 pm. Quatre, whose
hands had begun to turn an interesting shade of blue, thanked every god of
whom he had ever heard and hastily boarded the bus. He flashed his bus
pass at the driver, headed toward the nearest seat, and flopped down
unceremoniously upon it, staring into the blackness which called itself a
window. He grinned to himself; soon he would be home.
But it was not to be.
*************
Duo grinned manically, flipping channels like a madman. He had been
doing so for the past half-hour: crouched on Trowa's beanbag chair,
Quatre's remote control firmly in hand. "This is GREAT!" he exclaimed
for perhaps the third time in the past ten minutes.
"Duo…" Trowa muttered. "Quatre might not be happy if you broke his
remote…"
Duo ignored this statement completely, off in his own happy little world
of channel-surfing, where he was King.
"Hey! Maxwell!" A well-placed pillow bounced off Duo's head, startling
him enough for him to drop the remote. Trowa dove, successfully
recovering it, and turned the station to Comedy Central, where Jon Stewart
was hosting the Daily Show.
"Ow!" Duo whinged, glaring. "Hey! What was that about, man! Can't a
guy have any fun!"
Any reply Wufei might have made was cut off, as Quatre abruptly
stumbled in the door, glaring balefully at his bus route map.
"Q-man, what took ya?" Duo asked, grinning cheekily.
"CATA," Quatre announced solemnly, the light of battle in his eyes, "is a
CRACK WHORE!"
Those present blinked, more or less in unison.
"They have two buses running the 37- and 38-S routes, right, every twenty
minutes? Yeah, okay, fine – except they switch sides at Shaw/Farm, the
rat bastards!" Quatre shouted, panting into the silence that followed.
Duo grinned. "I coulda told you that, man. Shoulda asked."
~TSUZUKU~