Kuja's Thoughful Day

By StarPriestessMinna

Note - This is demented....don't take it seriously.


pKuja let his long silver hair blow in the wind on the deck of the Hilda Garde. Cleyra had just been destroyed by the elephant lady a few days ago, and a creeping feeling of remorse was coming to him.

piWhy should I feel guilty ?,/i he thought,i It was Brahn who did it. The rodents deserved to die anyway.They have no fashion sense."/i

pWhen he thought of the hideous queen, he burst into laughter.
"Poor foolish elephant woman, you're gonna get whats coming to you!Your disgusting anyways, people as ugly as you should not exist!"br
pKuja didn't realize that Zorn and Thorn had heard everything, or that they were right behind him.

p

"What is he talking about?", queried Zorn.br
"That I do not know.", said Thorn.br
"Nor do I"br
"Shall we ask?" and "Let us ask, shall we?" came out at the same time.br
"Will you two stop your babbling?! I'm trying to concentrate. You two are good for nothing but to flap your jaws!"p
Thorn and Zorn were hurt by this and decided to go practice some cartwheels.
pAfter a while, Kuja began to feel very tired physically, but his brain raced with things to do. pHe made a mental list in his mind which went something like this:br
i1st - Do away with Elephette.br
2nd - Find the bratty little summoner girl that lives in Madian Sari and extract all her eidolons.br
3rd - Kill little brother Zidane or at least force him into eternal slavery.br
4th - Boil Garland and the rest of the Genomes alive. Destroy the HELL that is Terra.BR
5th - Take over the Universe and marry Garnet, have a couple of kids , ect./i
P

Once again Kuja laughed wildly.
He decided to go his private chambers, for wind was making his hair very unruly, which was a bad thing to Kuja.p
He sat down at his dressing table and looked in the mirror.p

He was a very handsome man, even though alot of people mistook him for a female at times, probably because he wore no pants and only half a skirt. But the important thing was that ihe/i thought he was beautiful. p
Very ivery/i beautiful.
P
"Oh Kuja you are beautiful! Ha! Of course Her Highness, Miss Garnet would prefer you over IHIM/I."brbr

"Master Kuja is there anything that you need?" and "Can we be of service to you, my Lord?" came the twin jesters' annoying voices.
br pThis startled Kuja terribly.
p"Next time knock before you disturb me in my private chambers,unless you wish to see a demonstration of Ultima. But since you asked...should I get a haircut? or my nails done? or a new outfit? I need to impress Miss Garnet. And Zorn,where did you put my Cover Girl Ultra Light foundation for dry skin ?"br
" My honorable Lord Kuja you are amazingly beautiful as you are! But black would compliment your angelically silver hair very nicely. " and "It's in my room I shall get it for you!"

p"Oh yes! Praise the Gods for my gift of beauty! You just wait Garland ...I'll look so much cooler than you in all black...and Zidane, I'll steal Princess Garnet away forever and ever!"

Laughter echoed throughout the ship.

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Fin.
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Demented, eh?

-
Star Preistess Minna

Bye :)