Slayers Labyrinth
A Slayers/Labyrinth Crossover
By Sakura
Chapter Six
Sage Advice
Lina and Zelgadis ran as fast as
they could the crazy contraption with the whirring knives and cleavers close
behind. Catching sight of a very rusty door on her right, the red haired girl
ran up to it and slammed into it, making a loud gonging sound. The chimera
caring only for his own hide, not to mention forgetting he was made of stone and
thus impervious to metal objects like those, ran past her.
"Zelgadis get your lying snake
in the grass butt back here!" yelled the girl as she desperately banged her
fists on the door.
"Lina, I can explain," he
said joining her by the rusted door.
"Shut up and PUSH!"
she ordered, whacking him in the head and once again hurting her hand on his
thick skull.
The two pushed and pushed, but the
door refused to open. "Did it ever occur to you that it might open from the
other side?" asked the chimera, tired of pushing and no results.
"Now he tells me," she
muttered. "Ok that's it! I've had enough of this wacked out place!"
She began to chant another one of her spells.
"Whatever you're doing, you'd
better hurry, the cleaners are closing in!" warned Zelgadis as a very loud
whirring sound approached.
"Burst Brando!" Lina
screamed and the spell knocked the door off its hinges to clang nosily in
protest at being slammed into a wall.
Dashing inside, the two missed being
skewered and chopped to itty bitty bits by mere inches as the cleaners as the
whirring wall of sharp metal objects passed harmlessly by. Lina immediately
plopped on her back and began to wheeze and pant for breath. Zelgadis however
wasn't that winded and mentally cursed himself for being so stupid to forget
that the cleaners couldn't hurt him. He smiled smugly, as he decided not to tell
her that. After all it was the girl's fault the cleaners were summoned in the
first place.
"Xellos-sama must really like
you. He's pulling out the heavy artillery, the cleaners, the Rabid Fangirls..."
his voice trailed off as he winced at the thought of being fed to the pack of
hormonal teenage girls.
"Yeah, he's a real barrel of
laughs," she said totally annoyed at the mazoku king, but not too loud in
case he was listening.
Of course Zelgadis was too busy
looking around the room they were in to pay attention to the petite redhead.
Spying an awfully long ladder, he went up to it and placed one foot on the first
rung then the other, testing it. Seeing that it would support his weight, he
said. "This'll do." He looked over to the girl who was still lying on
the dust covered floor. "Unless you want to be a permanent resident, you'd
better follow me. Come on."
Lina got up and dusted herself off
the best she could then glared at the chimera. "No way pal! There's no way
I'm gonna listen to a lying jerk like you. Especially since you're taking me
back to the beginning."
Her harsh words stung him like a
swarm of angry hornets. But he'd be damned if he was going to let her see that.
"I only told him that to get him off my back."
"Yeah right, and that's supposed
to make me trust you again?" she spat in mistrust.
"Let me put it in a way a kid
like you can understand." The girl began to fume. "What choice do you
have?"
He was right. Her options were pretty
much nil. In fact they were. Zelgadis was the only person in the labyrinth she'd
met so far that actually seemed to know his way around AND offered to help. Well
she had bribed him to, but at least he hadn't killed her and run off. Yet. Gods
she HATED it when someone else was right.
"All right you win, Zel,"
she said acquiescing. "For now," she added under her breath.
"Stupid Stone Boy."
"Now that we got that settled,
can we please go now?" he said irritated and anxious to get as far away
from Lina as possible. He then began to climb the ladder. The girl looked up and
got a short case of vertigo trying to see where it went. Figuring that it would
do no good to just stare, she too began to climb.
After what seemed to be a
never-ending torment, the two decided to take a short breather. The redhead hung
for dear life to the ladder after she took a look back down to gauge how far
they've come. Her hands clutched to the sides, as another wave of vertigo hit
her.
"The main thing here is not to
look down," the chimera said without looking down.
"Don't look down he says,"
she muttered.
"Nani?"
"Nothing," she said,
starting to shake the ladder.
"I told you not to look
down," he said in a tone that screamed 'I told you so'.
"Oops, sorry about that!"
she called up, rubbing the back of her head.
"Whatever, let's get
going," was the reply. Zelgadis sighed and continued to climb. 'Why me,
L-sama?' he said to himself.
"You know, Zel, that was a good
idea tricking Xellos like that," Lina began thinking that conversation
would make the rest of the climb go faster.
"Listen, you really have to
understand my position here. I may look it, but I'm not as powerful as Xellos.
That's why I do as he says."
"In other words, you're scared
of him," she said reading between the lines.
"Thank you so very much for
making it obvious," came the sarcastic reply.
"You're welcome. Why don't you
just find some way to beat him?"
"Why do you think I'm doing
working for him? Anyway you'd never know what it's like to be fed rear first to
a pack of Rabid Fangirls. I've seen the strongest bishounen come out with their
minds turned completely to mush."
"It's THAT bad?" she
asked.
"That's only if you're lucky
enough to escape. There are still other bishounen who've never been seen again.
I'm telling you the Fangirls are a fate worse than death." Lina couldn't
help swallowing hard at what she was hearing. But she was also glad since it
seemed that Fangirls only attacked bishounen. Or did they? She had learned the
hard way that nothing was what it seemed in the twisted world she'd been thrown
into.
"I can see light," came
Zelgadis' voice as he stopped a few feet above her. He appeared to be feeling
the ceiling above him and she heard a faint click. Suddenly a shaft of light
burst through an opening, blinding her. When she recovered, she let out an whoop
of joy when she looked up and saw the blue sky.
After climbing out of an ornate stone urn and out of the cold, damp, stinky
tunnels, Lina took huge gulps of fresh air. "Yahoo!! No more tunnels!"
she yelled at the tope of her lungs. They were standing in a garden of some
sort. Actually it was the kind rich folks have out back at their country
mansions. You know, the kind where there are neat little paths and carefully
manicured flower beds and perfectly trimmed hedges.
"You're on your own, now
kid," Zelgadis said turning to leave.
"Nani?"
"You heard me. This is as far as
I go. There's no way I'm sticking around when you're a trouble magnet."
"Hey!" she sputtered.
"I told you I wouldn't promise
anything," he said coolly.
"But..." She could feel
tears threaten to fall from her eyes.
"Crying's not going to work on
me. See you around. Maybe," he said waving over his shoulder.
Lina instead of crying, got angry and
fireballed the retreating chimera. However, this time he was wearing a flame
retardant shirt and hood. (;_;) "You... usotsuki! (liar!) You said you'd
help! Hey I'm talking to you! Stupid Stone Boy!"
The last caused him to stop in his
tracks, turn around and yell back, "Don't call me that! Anyway I DID help
so don't call me a liar!"
"You know Zel, you're the
biggest coward I've ever seen."
Doing his best to remain calm, the
chimera counted to ten before coming up to her and say, "Insulting me like
that won't work either. I already know I'm a coward, so sue me."
Lina then decided to resort to the
lowest blow she could think of. "Stone Boy!" she said, sticking out
her tongue while pulling down the skin below her eye.
"I said not to call me
that!"
"Stupid, stupid, stupid Stone
Boy! You stupid, lying, chicken of a Stone Boy!" she retorted, beginning to
feel better now that she was releasing some of the stress.
Zelgadis growled and threw up his
arms in frustration. "That's it! I am so out of here! I only came here
because you had to insist on going ahead! I tried to warn you, but NO!
You think you're so smart, solve this damn labyrinth on your own! Goodbye!"
Lina just stood gaping at the fuming
chimera. Never in all her life had she seen anyone so upset, not even Amelia got
THAT upset. Zelgadis walked off a few feet in a huff before calming down
and leant against a hedge. She was starting to feel sorry. She had after all
used the one insult that had really hurt him to the core. Feeling like a
complete fool, Lina hung her head, not wanting to make contact with the
chimera's piercing eyes.
"Don't think I'm going to come
save you next time," he said as calmly as if he'd been commenting on the
weather.
"You so sure about that?"
she asked. Zelgadis snorted as he looked away and thus missed the sneaky look on
the girl's face as she crept up to him and snatched his money pouch from his
belt.
"Oi!" he yelled in protest.
Lina laughed triumphantly as she levitated herself and dangled the pouch just
outside the chimera's reach.
"Give that back!" he
demanded.
"Nuh-uh, you get it back AFTER
I get to the castle. Now show me the way!"
"You heard Him. The castle is the LAST place I'd rather be!" he
protested. "I don't believe this. REAR FIRST at the Fangirls..."
he mumbled closing his eyes and shaking his head.
Ignoring the chimera's pleas, Lina
looked around the garden hoping to catch some sign of her goal. "Now where
the heck's the stupid castle?" Looking over the hedges, she could just make
out the spires of Xellos' home glinting in the distance, still a long way off.
"Great just what we need another damned maze. Hmm, now which would be the
quickest way?"
"Beats me," said a VERY
grumpy chimera.
"Urusai! (Shut up!) I'm trying
to think here!" complained Lina.
"Give back my money!" he
whined, still trying to reach the pouch the girl had forgotten that was dangling
from her hand. "Give it back you, brat!"
Landing and ignoring the fuming
chimera, she closed her eyes and extended a finger, pointing at the various
exits as she chanted, "Eenie, meenie, miney, mo."
"Oh that's really clever,"
muttered the chimera.
Once she had finished choosing an
exit using the 'scientific method' she strode up to the nearest one and said,
"All right, let's try this one." With that she strode through the
narrow path between the hedges. Zelgadis reluctantly followed her only because
he wanted to get his money back.
The path ended in another clearing
just like the one she had just left. "What the?" she said confused.
Daring to peek into the urn there, she saw a ladder sticking out of a black hole
in the bottom. They were right where they started from! Swearing, she then
grabbed Zelgadis and ran through the next nearest exit.
After trying all the exits, Lina
yelled and stomped her foot on the stone path. "This is nuts! How the hell
am I supposed to get outta here?!"
"You're the smart one," the
chimera said looking rather pleased with himself for some reason. "I'm sure
you can figure it out."
"Don't be so damn smug! You
could be some help here you know," she spat back.
"Why should I?" he asked
refusing to move from where he was.
"Because," she said staring
at him after coming extremely close, "if you don't, you won't get this
back." She patted the pouch, which was now attached to her belt and it made
a pleasant jingling sound as the coins inside bounced around.
"But... I honestly don't know
which way to go. I haven't been given the duty to do care for this part of the
labyrinth," he said regretting ever meeting the girl. "Look, that's MY
money! Give it back! I did my part of the bargain! It's not fair!"
"No, it isn't," she said
agreeing. "But that's the way life is, ne?"
Finally looking around, they noticed
a small figure sat in the middle of the clearing on a raised dais of some sort.
Upon closer inspection they came to realize they were facing a very short old
woman with silvery aqua hair. On her head was a straw hat, which had some sort
of bird that was more lizard than bird. It appeared that she was deep in thought
since she hadn't moved since the two had begun to stare at her.
"Um, excuse me," Lina said
coming up to the old woman. "Can you help me?"
The old woman still hadn't moved or
acknowledge her presence. She just sat there, ignoring the two people before
her. She did raise her head though, but it was obvious she was looking at
something only she could see and chose not to be bothered with anything else.
"Please!" the red haired girl begged. "Obaa-san!"
The bird on her hat jumped up and
down and glared at her, "Get lost! Can't you see she's thinking?!"
The old woman held up a finger and
said, "Sh!"
"We're sorry," Lina said
then sat down on the dais steps and waited for her to finish her thinking.
"And stop staring! She HATES
that!" ordered the bird lizard.
"Sorry," Lina said quickly
looking away.
The old woman opened her mouth and
said, "Quiet."
"Geez I was just trying to be
helpful," it said put off.
"Where was I?" asked the
old woman, putting her finger against her chin.
"How should I know?" the
bird lizard replied, "I'm not the one thinking here."
It was then that she finally noticed
she wasn't along and smiled at the young person sitting on the steps. "Oh,
konnichi wa little boy," she said pleasantly.
Lina sputtered, but kept her temper.
Her mother and stepmother both told her constantly to be nice to those much
older than her. "I'm actually a girl, obaa-san," she said with her
best polite smile she could muster.
"Oh, sou desu ne? (Is that so?)
And who is this?" she asked looking at Zelgadis who looked none too happy
to be the center of attention. "Your oniisan perhaps?"
"Um, no." Lina said
slightly embarrassed to have the chimera mistaken for her brother. "He's
um... my friend."
He was about to explain to the old
woman, though not so politely, that he and the ill tempered girl were in no way
whatsoever related, but stopped himself when he heard Lina's answer. Looking at
her he began to blush. She was the first and only person in this sorry excuse
for a kingdom to actually call him 'friend.' Did she really mean it?
"Really? Well, now what can I do
for you young lady?" said the old woman.
"I'd really appreciate it if you
could tell me how to get to the castle from here. Every path I take just leads
back to here and I'm really have to get there," the redhead explained then
added the universal magic word, "please, obaa-san."
"Oh just call me Auntie Aqua,
dear," said the old woman smiling. "So you want to get to the castle,
ne?"
"How's THAT for
smarts?" the bird lizard piped up, obviously unimpressed with 'Auntie
Aqua'.
"Will you be quiet!"
demanded Auntie.
"Oops did I say that out
loud?" said the bird, sheepishly. Lina quickly covered her mouth to
suppress a giggle.
"Well, dearie, sometimes the
best way forward is to go back," she said pursing her lips. "And often
the way back is to -"
"go forward," the bird
lizard answered for her. "That's some advice, huh?"
"I thought I told you to shut
up!" Auntie said getting annoyed. "You see, young lady when it looks
like we're not getting anywhere, most of the time we are."
"Well WE definitely
aren't," Zelgadis said not believing he was listening to this nonsense.
"Maybe so, young sir," said
the old woman, "but maybe not. Not everything is all it..." Auntie
Aqua began to feel another profound thought invade her mind and quickly finished
the sentence before going completely catatonic as before. "appears to
be."
"Well, that's it all
folks!" said the bird lizard in a very bad imitation of Porky Pig.
"Just leave a contribution in the box."
Looking down, Lina saw a tiny box in
the old woman's hand and it rattled expectantly. Her hand went
unconsciously to the pouch at her hip. "Don't even think it!" the
chimera warned. "That's mine, remember?"
She sheepishly took away her hand and
said, "Well I might as well use the only thing I've got left." The
girl took off one of her gloves and removed her mother's ring. "I really
wish I didn't have to do this, but kaasan always said that you should try to
give to those who need stuff." With that she dropped the ring into the box
and it make a tinkling sound as it landed in the empty box.
"What a nice, kid," the
bird lizard said after Lina and Zelgadis left the dais to examine the exits.
"You didn't have to give her
that," the chimera complained. He had hoped she'd give it to him instead.
It did look rather expensive. "She didn't tell us anything worth while.
"I don't know, Zel. I mean maybe
she was right," said the girl pondering what Auntie Aqua had told her.
"Look, we certainly got no where going forward, right?" He nodded, not
knowing where this was leading. "Soooo maybe we were supposed to go
backwards."
"Come again?" he asked,
confused.
"You know, walk through the
exits backwards. It's a long shot, but it's better than standing here."
The chimera had to agree with her on
that. ANYTHING was better than doing nothing. Sighing, he followed the
redhead through an exit only this time walking backwards, feeling completely
stupid.
"Would you look at that?!"
exclaimed the bird lizard after the two left. "They actually listened to ya,
'Auntie'." Below, the old woman softly snored away. "It's soo
enlightening to stay with you." Another snore was the reply. Sighing, the
bird lizard decided to join its companion in a nap and curled up on her hat.