Author's Note: I had a horrible case of writer's block, but two "gentlemen" inspired this by your typical guy greeting by pus

Author's Note:  I had a horrible case of writer's block, but two "gentlemen" inspired this by your typical guy greeting by pushing and punching each other.  And I used Draco Malfoy because his name fit the song better than Lucius Malfoy.  Enjoy my work of Art!!!  *snickers*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Voldemort is cackling sinisterly (he's practicing!) when Draco Malfoy walks in.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Draco: Yo!  What's up, Mortie?  *~Punches Voldemort on the shoulder so hard that Voldemort flies to the other side of the room (which is very large) and hits the wall with a clickety-clickety-clickety-SHMUCK!~*

Voldemort: *~Stands up and brushes himself off (A/N: Assume they recover every time they get knocked over or something because I'm too lazy to type that every time, ok?)~* What the heck was that for?!

Draco: *~Shrugs~* I heard that's how you greet people these days.

Voldemort: Really?  I thought you did this.  *~Shoves Draco so hard (trying to be friendly!!) that Draco flies to the other side of the room (which is still very large) and crashes through the fiberglass wall (despite the fact that fiberglass is not known to them) with a bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…~*

Draco: No.  That's old, dude.  Now, we do this.  *~Shoves Voldemort's face in the mud~*

Voldemort: *~Switches into "Dork Lord" mode~* NO!  I am the Dork Lord; I am the Expert in the Ways of Greeting People!  You must do this!  *~Kicks Draco in the crotch, causing him to double over in pain~*

Draco: You (insert bad words here)!  This is how you greet people!  *~Breaks Voldemort's eyes and blacks his nose~*

Voldemort: *~Gasps~* How dare you?!  This is how you welcome someone!  *~Pulls out his wand and turns Draco's nose green~*  HA HA!!  sings

(To the tune of "Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer")

Draco, the green-nosed wizard,

Had a very funny nose!

And if you ever saw it,

You would even say, "Hey!  It doesn't glow!"

All of the other wizards

Used to never call him names.

Then one foggy Christmas Eve,

Santa came to say, (ho ho ho)

"Draco, with your nose not right,

Won't you kill yourself tonight?"

Then all the wizards laughed at him

As they shouted out with glee,

"Draco, the green-nosed wizard,

You'll go down in history!"

Draco: You Dork Lord!  You greet people like this!  *~Pulls out his wand and turns Voldemort into a pink ballerina.  He then proceeds to laugh insanely~*  sings

(Again, to the tune of "Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer")

Mortie, the pink ballerina

Had a very "pretty" dress!

And if you ever saw it,

You could even call it a mess!

All of the other Death Eaters,

Used to bow and say, "My lord!"

Then one foggy Christmas Eve,

Santa came to say, (ho ho ho)

"Mortie, with that dress so bright,

Won't you dance for us tonight?"

Then all the wizards hated him,

As they shouted with a gloat,

"Mortie, the pink ballerina,

You're the worst ballerina I know!"

Voldemort: Uh… Draco?

Draco: What??

Voldemort: I found a booger that fell from your nose.

Draco: Is it blue?

Voldemort: No, it's glow-in-the-dark rainbow.

Draco and Voldemort (together): Ooooooo…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As we leave Draco and Voldemort, they are riding into the sunset on horses that magically appeared out of nowhere over a hill that magically appeared out of nowhere.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

THE END!

Author's Note:  I don't own Draco or Voldemort.  I don't own "Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer," but the revised versions up there are MINE.  The booger is Draco's.  I don't want it, Draco!  The corny humor is mine.  If you like it enough, I'll try to write a sequel.  TTFN!!!  *~JellyBelly Crazy!~*