I walked around town, bored, for some time before determining that going in circles around the block wouldn't do any good for me. Besides, I'd just end up looking crazier than I really was. (And how crazy is that?)
Finally, I stopped at an old, abandoned barn, (not the one with the sheep, though). There were two black horses in wooden stalls that looked at me as if to say, "What do you think you're doing here?" A couple bales of musty straw, along with some pieces of plain straw were scattered across the gravel-covered ground. Perfect, a comfortable bed for once-although I didn't exactly plan to sleep. But, at least I could rest. Not sleep. Rest.
I approached the horses after my quick glance around the barn. They nickered and tossed their heads in the dark shadows. I reached out almost cautiously, slightly afraid that they would bite me. But, when my fingers made contact with the cool velvet nose of one of the great animals, I knew they wouldn't dare hurt me. I stroked my hand across the horse's nose, sprawling my fingers out in a pitiful attempt to try and cover the entire, long nose of the animal. Gently, I ran my fingers over the ears covered in bristly hairs. The delicate ears twitched underneath my fingers, and the horse snorted, blowing air on me. Big, glassy eyes stared at me, telling me all that I needed to know.
I grinned slightly. I understood what they wanted.
Walking around to the back of the horses' stalls, I pulled a leather knotted bridle off a rusty nail. The leather was smooth and beautifully tanned. It would work.
I returned back to the horses and reached out to them once again. Oh, how they wanted to be free! Carefully, I put the bridle on and opened the stall door. Patiently, I led the large horse out, her head raised high.
We walked out of the barn together, leaving her fellow horse behind. Only one was needed. She twitched anxiously as we stepped into the cool night air, blowing hot steam everywhere. Gently, I stroked her side, hoping that she was calm.
Then, grabbing onto the bridle, I swung myself up onto her back. She flinched upon my weight arriving onto her back, but didn't move away, for she was ready to go.
Cautiously, I held the bridle loosely in my sweaty palms. Amazingly, I was somewhat nervous about riding a horse-I never had before. Yet, I had always wanted to. I couldn't back out now.
Gently, I kicked my foot in her side, nudging her forward. She nickered softly and began to walk forward, probably just as confused as I was as to what we were going to do.
We moved together at a steady pace, covering a small part of the large, open field. Her feet padded lightly across the grass covered in dew at such a late hour. All around, the crickets chirped, and the spring peepers sang.
Tightening my grip on the worn leather bridle, I pushed my foot into her side again and muttered something that sounded like giddy-up. Hell, I didn't know what I was doing, but it sure sounded good.
There was a slight pause as she considered the request I had asked of her. Then, in one fluid motion, she took off. Instinctively, my hands tightened on the bridle, the adrenaline pumping through my veins.
We flew across the open field, covering more distance than I thought possible. She was enjoying it more than I was, as she turned sharp corners and galloped swiftly like she had wings upon her feet.
Above, the moonlight danced on the wet grass as the wind whistled through my hair. The night air was cold, and our breath came out in tiny puffs as we whipped across the field. Her powerful legs were pounding, her hooves beating the ground mercilessly.
Feeling braver, I let go of the reins carefully and let my hands go above my head. The wind flew through my fingers, and I felt as though I could snatch it up, holding it close forever.
In that one perfect moment, that moment in which I became one with such a majestic animal as we flew across the field like bird, I was free. Free of everything that had ever haunted me in my entire life. Lydecker. Manticore. Dreams that had died upon my lips. Love that I had never had. Everything left me.
Everything but the simple fact that I was free.