if walls could...

by aymei

Before you say it crap title i know, but it's a k/18 get together and my first fic....R&R please, I would especially love reviews from those who like Krillin and Juu too, *COMPLETED* Thanks for your reviews! much appreciated ^__^

2. if walls could...see

Authors note; Jasper, walks into the kitchen, where Ami sits at the table with Lexi and Marvin stuffing chips into their mouths. "See this dog…" Lexi said pointing at the dog now sitting in patiently next to Ami who has a chip in her mouth as she types. "It's got a big fat bum." She finishes. Just then Jasper decides to run out of the kitchen through the small opening of the door and slips on the wet floor hitting his bum on the door as he makes his way out. "And there's the evidence." Lexi said triumphantly "he can't even pass through the small opening. Fat bum, I swear." She reaches into the washing machine "You gonna finish it then?" Ami nods "yep…you bet!" She says giving a thumbs up sign and grinning widely. "Stop…please, you have no idea what you look like." Lexi says as Marvin bursts out laughing.

Part two; If walls could see

Rating C (caution); Nothing majorly bad. Maybe slight swearing but nothing more than one hears every now and then oh yeah and the slight citrus thing I was talking abut in part one, it's here but no worse than what you might see on daytime TV…it's so tiny…cross my heart…besides I'm too much of a wimp to be too detailed anyway. T'aint my style…(*whispers*) in other words I can't write a lemon to save my life. (But don't tell anyone that) You'll see what I mean…

Disclaimers? Same as before…don't own them, never have….

Two people making memories

Just too good to tell

And these arms are never empty

When we laugh and when we fail

The faded pictures,

Making magic, taking chances

Making love

When I'm feeling weak

You gave me wings

When the fire has no heat

You light it up again

When I hear no violins

You play my every string…

…If the walls had eyes

My, they would see the love inside

They would see me

In your arms in ecstasy

And with every move

They'll know I love you so

…Can you keep a secret?

After the sweltering heat of the last two days the wind that had picked up was a welcome relief. The skies had taken on a deep midnight-gray hue and blocked out the stars. "You've been gone awhile." Juunanagou said suddenly breaking the silence they'd shared since she'd come late in the night two days ago. Then again they'd barely seen each other within this time. She gave an indistinct nod. With her twin she didn't really need to say much, it wasn't that they hadn't anything to say to each other, it was just that most of the time they didn't need words. They could almost feel what the other was thinking. "Worried about me Juunana?" She questioned not really expecting an answer as she watched him staring off into the distance. He didn't give one. She had an idea of what he was thinking as he sat there clothed only in his jeans and barely shivering at the wind that had begun to tease tendrils of hair back from his face.

"With him…" it wasn't a question and she didn't confirm anything. However it did start her thinking again, things she'd successfully blocked out after trying all morning and afternoon and _all_ of the day before. He'd gone and ruined all her good work.

::Thanks a lot Juunana.::

Job…?

She remembered what he'd said clearly. He'd just done it to look good!…she didn't know why she was surprised, she had suspected it but she'd…hoped—She shook herself mentally the beginnings of anger subsiding. It was the fact that she'd even entertained such thoughts that made her angry, that she should have known better than that, she was after all the one with the logical brain. She wasn't going to go back again, it was better all round if she stayed right here, she promised herself mentally snorting at her own attempt to delude herself.

She'd left countless times before only to return, what would make this any different? It was like a disease…no more like… an addiction. She kept going back even while she questioned why. She was sure he was laughing at her right now. She bet he knew that sooner or later she would be back.

Whose bright idea had it been to go to him in the first place?

::yours::

She should never have stepped foot anywhere near the place.

He wouldn't have minded if she hadn't returned he would have probably just seen it as one of her attempts to tease him. He would have probably just brushed it off as something she'd never really meant.

::Now you tell me::

She hadn't meant to kiss him, that had just…happened. She certainly hadn't been expecting the mind numbing loss of control. It was an inexplicable and dangerous factor which she wanted to avoid even as she craved it. It was so obvious that she was falling into uncharted territories. One she seemed to be alone in. She wasn't sure she knew how to defend herself against something that wormed it's way into her heart a little at a time without her being aware of it half the time. It was a fight she might inevitably loose and it was scary but she wasn't sure she wanted to win either.

"Will you be okay?" she found herself asking after more silent thought. The smirk that crept over his face was so very familiar "I'll be fine, I can take care of myself." She looked at him silent warning flashing in her eyes even as he wondered about paying the little monk a single visit. It wouldn't take more than that to be rid of him. He'd seen this coming for a while, the way she kept darting off and disappearing for days on end. They may be brother and sister but they didn't tail each other and neither were they each other's shadow but her recent disappearances had been ridiculous. "For now he amuses me." She said. He understood perfectly. She might have as well said, 'stay away from him.' She'd practically labeled him hers. His smirk dropped. "You don't owe him anything whatsoever." He pointed out. "I know that." She said, "What makes you think I feel indebted to him."

"You said it." He said as she clamped her mouth shut her stubborn gaze doing the talking.

::well I don't feel like that::

"That's why he did it isn't it." It wasn't a question, more an accusation. She didn't answer and he came to his own conclusion.

"You do know the fool has an almighty crush on you." He said a few minutes of silence later.

Had. She almost corrected him surprising herself with the disappointment she felt at this.

"Can you blame him if he does? What's there not to like?" she said instead more to tease him. He looked at her eyes of frozen ice roaming over her face noting the unconsciously stubborn set of her jaw. He knew that look…it read 'mind made up no matter what'. He'd seen it countless times when she'd had just about enough of his ideas of fun and was about to take matters into her own hands. "And his friends?"

"I'm not scared of them Juunana." She said laughing a little at the very idea.

He supposed he could tell her to stay right here, he supposed he could force her to stay if he wanted to, he could lay a guilt trip on her for choosing the puny human over him but he knew she would know why he would try to do that and it was for this same reason he said nothing of the sort. She'd made up her mind and had two days in which to do that. There was no talking her out of it now. Besides he was sure she would return when she eventually got bored with the pipsqueak. If a man that barely reached her shoulders was what seemed to amuse her for now so be it.

"I can't ever bring myself to like him." He said instead.

She nodded suddenly looking a bit worried and he knew why. "I won't fall apart because you've left you know." He said "I might even end up having a bit more fun in my life without you there to ruin it all."

"You do crazy things." She pointed out as a flash of lightening lit up the sky. In that tiny moment she saw the smile in his eyes, the gentleness.

"I never thought I would ever say it but so do you." He said and she knew what he meant but still adopted an 'I-don't-know-what-you-mean' look as she smiled.

The sky returned to darkness after the streak of lightening that had set it alight disappeared. The wind was getting stronger by the minute. It was obvious that this was going to be quite a downpour. Krillin watched the swaying trees absently. He half wished she hadn't come at all, surely that would have been better than having her come back only to have her leave again and not return. He'd become used to having her near, waking up to see her downstairs flicking through the channels on the TV, having her to talk to even though her speech seemed to consist mainly of 'humph's and 'hmm's, just knowing she was there. He'd almost come to take it for granted, knowing she would be there the next day. Now she was gone and he didn't know if she'd be coming back, she hadn't left anything behind. It had been the first thing he done. Roshi had thought him mad as he searched. She hadn't touched the clothes in the wardrobe but he knew she didn't consider them hers even though he had got them for her. Apart from that there was nothing else. He remembered the last conversation they'd had and wondered if that had been what made her leave. He sighed unable to resist the urge to go 'duh' and settled into the nearby sofa. What had she wanted him to say? If he'd said half of what he had wanted to say she would have probably sent him crashing through the wall…she might have even laughed at him. Either way it would have hurt more than it hurt to not be able to tell her. It required him to speak of things he'd only ever told himself, he didn't want to be laughed at. Not about what he felt. That would hurt too much. Besides, if he had told her the truth wouldn't she have still left anyway? What about the chance that she might have stayed, the thought was fleeting and he ignored it. He couldn't help but feel like she'd betrayed him somehow, just up and leaving like that, deprived him of something important but then he realised that she didn't owe him a thing and if he'd become dependant on having her around it wasn't her fault. She hadn't promised him anything. He didn't think he would be able to get used to having her gone, not now…and certainly not like this. If he had another chance, he would tell her this time. No more hiding away. A thought suddenly occurred to him. What if she hadn't gone far? What if she was nearby somewhere on one of the islands? What if she was wandering somewhere out there with a storm like this brewing. She could be lost or even hurt. He realised at the same time that this was an unreasonable path for his thought to take. She was more than capable of taking care of herself and had been doing so long before him and it was highly doubtful that she was lost. She certainly didn't need him and she had said so countless times.

He was going against everything he'd just thought moments later when the sky was torn open by a loud crack of thunder and the rain began falling with a vengeance. He was reaching for the door before realizing it. It never hurt to just check right? To know for certain. To just check the vicinity, he wouldn't go far but he wasn't about to give up there were loose ends. He could end up regretting it.

He landed a few feet from the door suddenly sensing someone's presence in the house. The lights weren't what alerted him as that was his fault since he'd left them on. At first he couldn't figure out who it could be. Roshi and the gang weren't here they'd gone off for a few days, they had said they'd been planning it for ages but he suspected it more of a tactful way of getting away from his miserable self.

Juuhachigou.

It flickered through his head almost instinctively. It was definitely her…or did he just desperately want it to be. He was inside in an instant all manner of thoughts running through his head. Was she okay, was she hurt, was she—

She looked up as he burst in her hands still in the process of putting down the cup of hot chocolate. Her feet came out from under her nightdress where she'd hidden them. The frizz of hair on her head was a testament to its recent dampness. She fixed him with a surprised and bewildered gaze. To say he felt highly stupid at that point was an understatement.

"What were you doing out in a storm like this?" she asked incredulously taking in his drenched form. He looked like a drowned rat, thrice over.

"Looking for you." He replied almost accusingly. Beyond the slight frown he gave he was dancing…she came back, she came back, she-

"Why?" She asked confused

"Because I thought you'd gone, No explanation, I thought something had happened to you, God!, I thought you might be hurt or something!" It was the first time he'd raised his voice with her and she was taken aback though he didn't know if it was the fact that he'd been worried about her or the fact that he'd dared to raise his voice. She looked at him puzzled "and that would have bothered you?" Before he could answer she brushed it aside. "Didn't you see the note?"

"Note?" he repeated questioningly lost.

"Note." She repeated phonetically as if explaining something to a dumb child her index finger coming together with her thumb less than an inch apart as she continued "You know, those little pieces of paper with writing on it. I left one on the table right over there." She said pointing over to the now empty table. "But there's nothing there."

"I can see that." She said her expression one of tested patience.

"What I mean is there wasn't anything there to begin with." He said. She frowned "Are you calling me a liar?" It wasn't a question she expected an answer to…and not one he dared even make an answer for. She sighed and went over to the table. She bent down suddenly reaching under it as she spotted a piece of white. She retrieved it and waved it at him "Idiot." She murmured as she ripped it into little pieces. He looked sheepish, maybe if he'd just checked a bit more thoroughly. "I didn't get to read it." He pointed out softly.

"It's irrelevant now." she said firmly with a tone of finality that indicated she didn't wish to be questioned about it. "You're dripping on the carpet." She pointed out. He hurried off to change. He knew without having to look that his cheeks were red with embarrassment. Mental note to self, he thought, always check things properly before jumping to conclusions.

However, He'd got what he wanted. She was here now. He'd said he'd tell her hadn't he? So what was he waiting for? He shook his head, there was no way he was going in there guns blazing and make more of a fool of himself than he'd just done.

She wasn't there when he got back but he soon found out why when she came back in cradling another cup of hot chocolate which she promptly deposited in front of him.

"That seems to help." She said simply as she returned to her seat. He stared at her. "T-thanks."

She gave a 'humph' "I just don't want you sneezing all over me." He gave a small smile still watching her. Her gaze didn't stray from the Television screen. He noticed she'd brushed her hair out and it sparkled every strand now in place. She must have done that right after he'd left he thought nonchalantly. He found his gaze following the profile of her chin up to her mouth, her nose and her eyes. He looked over at the screen she was watching so intently. Commercials. Now was a good time…She rose. "I'm off." She announced.

Now.

"Juuhachi…"

"What?" she asked from the doorway. He was quiet a moment before speaking "I need to tell you-"

"Is this important and can't it wait till tomorrow?" She asked stifling a yawn looking surprised at the action.

"No." he said swallowing nervously.

"No what? No it's not important or no it can't wait till tomorrow?"

"Er, yes, it's important and no, it can't wait…?"

She came back in and sank down in the sofa next to him fixing him with one of her penetrating and unconsciously intimidating gazes "what do you want?"

"It's about…I want …what I mean is I-"

"Spit it out." She said impatiently. She watched him as he struggled to find words. Extremely bushy brows he seemed to have she thought absently. His hair was beginning to take on a fluffy appearance now that it was semi damp. Silly fool had actually thought her in need of his help. Had he forgotten she was more than capable of taking care of herself? Why it should bother him she didn't know. But if it did…did that mean…She killed that track of thought instantly with another mental thought that seemed to serve its purpose almost too well and her short-lived euphoria didn't just die, it withered away.

She was watching him so intently that he faltered off uselessly. It was those eyes, he thought. They didn't let you think. That they were capable of holding so much expression just as easily as it could hold nothing at all. Shards of ice that could hold the brilliant fire of anger just as easily as they could hold frosty indifference. Though he couldn't even begin to fathom what she was thinking it was just amazing in itself to see it. What had he been about to say again? The window suddenly burst open a gust of wind and rain blasting it's way into the room making them both jump. Their faces were inches apart. They stared at each other one probably more surprised than the other. He realised that contrary to what he'd been thinking her gaze hadn't been pulling him in, He'd simply moved closer as the inch that had separated them attested to. He knew he should close the window but he was reluctant to part. He didn't want to lose—

"You better close that window." She said.

He sighed mentally—the moment.

It was certainly lost now. However despite the resumption of her no nonsense tone of voice he was sure there had been an ever so slight tremble to it.

She'd almost done it again…and without realizing it. How was it possible that she could have no recollection of moving? What exactly had she been thinking about at that point?

His brows?!

Her mouth lifted into an incredulous sneer of self-disgust. No, not just his brows, she'd been thinking about his eyes too a tiny mental voice interjected benignly. She was unable to hold back the small smile and the light colour that stained her cheeks. "how could I-" she began out loud before realizing she did "Argh!" She cried out in dismay. She was having conversations with herself now and worse of all she was probably, probably? Was, blushing like the pocket-sized human always did. She walked over to the window and opened it wide. The wind rushed in like a wild, savage animal that had been let loose. It tore through her hair and past her ears blocking out everything else as she closed her eyes against it. She could hear and feel nothing except the howling wind thus effectively blocking out the questions floating around in her head. She didn't turn at he knock on the door or even when it opened cause she didn't hear it…or didn't want to.

"Juuhachi?" Krillin hovered by the door uncertainly wondering what she was thinking as she stood there in the semi-darkness. The dull glow from the lamp was all that illuminated the room, or rather one tiny part of it save for the lightening that came every now and then and was more generous. She was just standing there arms folded. Almost as still as a statue if not for the movement of her hair and clothes.

He shivered. ::Man, that's cold!::

He walked over and closed the window. Now he could hear himself think. He looked up at her and found himself staring into expressionless bluey-grey eyes as cold as the storm that rank amok outside. Silence fell.

"Are you upset?" he asked referring to what had happened earlier.

"What should I be upset about?" He unfolded her arms taking her hands in his. They were only slightly cold. He led her to the bed and made her sit. She didn't even resist. He didn't know whether that was a good thing. "What?" she questioned at his worried frown vaguely realizing he hadn't said what it was that he'd wanted to say to her earlier…then again, she hadn't waited.

He took a deep breath letting go of her hands and stepping back.

"You may not want to hear this right now Juu, but I'm in love with you." He said awaiting her explosion but it never came. She simply looked at him expressionlessly. Okay, he thought, maybe he'd been a little irrational in thinking she would have reacted in blazing anger but no expression at all? Nothing whatsoever?

"Is that supposed to mean something to me?" she asked. He looked confused "I don't know." He said simply. She shook her head a little as if at his ignorance her gaze not meeting his. "Do you expect me to feel the same way about you?" She gave a small laugh and he almost cringed.

"Do you realize who you are talking to?" she looked out the window only briefly glancing at him as she continued "…I don't feel anything…what I do best is to look out for number one. That's all it's ever been about and ever will be. It's who I am." He was overcome by the desire to discontinue this 'fessing' session, to leave now while he still had a tattered piece of his dignity left. Yet he knew if he did he wouldn't ever be able to do this again. He might as well forge on and get it over with. He watched her; her gaze landed everywhere else but on him.

I don't feel anything…

He didn't believe that. He remembered her smile, he remembered the, admittedly fleeting, warm expressions he'd seen in her gaze every now and then when she'd thought he hadn't been looking or when he'd turned suddenly to catch her watching him. They'd been short, almost not there at all but he was suddenly more sure of them than anything else. He couldn't help feeling like there was an underlying confession to what she'd said. More like she was telling him not 'I don't' but rather 'I can't'. He remembered the way she'd tried to make him feel better when he'd been upset, it didn't make sense for her to have done that if she hadn't or wasn't capable of any feelings whatsoever. She may not feel the same way he did but she was wrong about one thing.

"No, that's not true and you know it."

A sliver of a brow rose "Are you trying to tell me how I feel?" she asked mockingly.

"Yes." He said, "Yes I suppose I am. What you seem to be forgetting is that I know you, maybe not well enough but enough to know you are not the unfeeling rock you make yourself out to be. You have more feelings to you than you are willing to admit and I refuse to believe anything to the contrary. Just be honest with yourself for a moment."

"Is that why you did it?" ignoring his righteous outburst

He sighed. Everything, he reminded himself, he must tell her everything no holding back on anything.

"Yes," he confessed his eyes closing momentarily. "I did it because I love you, I always have. I wanted you to be happy." He shrugged his shoulders, an almost self-conscious act as a result of her unwavering gaze.

"Okay, so maybe I did hope you would come to feel the same way about me too, that maybe somehow it would make you come to like me at least but there was always the risk that you wouldn't feel that way. You have to believe that wasn't what mattered and it is _not_ the reason I made that wish. What I wanted or felt wasn't what was important, I didn't want payment, I just wanted you to both to have another chance…" He sighed "…because I love you and your happiness means the world to me…"

She slanted her head questioningly "If that is the truth, why didn't you tell me that earlier…why didn't you tell me when I asked you for a reason?"

Was it his imagination or was her voice not as steady as it had it had been a second before. "Oh come on, you would've laughed your head off, rather like you did earlier and you know it." He said slowly.

"And you're telling me all this now because?"

He looked straight at her unable to fathom what she was feeling from her expression in the semi-darkness. The storm had calmed becoming just a steady trickle against the window.

"I want you to marry me." He said simply going quiet. She said nothing and even from what he could make out of her face it was blank and unreadable as ever. He supposed he should be thankful for the darkness, at least she couldn't see the blush of embarrassment crawling across his face. What had he expected really? He began rambling, it was born of the sudden need to make her understand, to explain himself, "It's just that when I thought you'd left and weren't coming back…I-I didn't know what to do and I realised…I just want you to stay with me because…" he trailed of into silence finishing what he meant to say mentally. You've become a part of me I don't think I can live without…I don't want to even try. He wasn't sure what her reaction to that would be so he left it unsaid withdrawing quietly and closing the door behind him. He could feel her gaze still watching him blankly even though he was now on the other side of the door. For the life of him he couldn't remember how telling her everything had been such a good idea. Surely this time he'd driven her away for good. He wouldn't be surprised if he woke up to find her gone again…and if she did go? If she decided never to come back…What would he do then?

She tossed and turned each time muttering her disapproval. She just couldn't find a comfortable position no matter how hard she tried. She'd never really had trouble sleeping before, but then again the mattress hadn't ever felt so lumpy and neither had the pillow ploughed into her neck before. She gave a low growl as she sat up finally defeated. Okay! She couldn't get to sleep because she was too busy thinking about the monk. There, she said it. Just as reluctantly as she had confessed to that she found herself making a beeline for his room all the while trying to convince herself she wasn't. She opened the door slowly peering inside and then opening the door as she leant against the doorframe watching the sleeping figure in bed curled almost into a ball amongst the sheets almost non-existent amongst the sheets. It brought a small smile of affection to her lips her features softening. It was a look that would have made Krillin's hart soar if he'd seen it. Unfortunately it was only one she allowed herself when alone. The question filtering through her head wasn't whether she cared about him, she had found out she did ages ago, what else could explain her behavior round him, it wasn't either a question of if she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him, the ever trusting soul that still believed she was capable of things she wasn't sure she could ever do. What else would explain her inane desire for him to at least like her, why else would she have cared so much about how he felt about her. Why else would it have hurt so much when she'd thought he'd considered her an obligation. Worse still was her conviction of not even deserving any such feelings mirrored in return. She was after all at the end of the day still a monster and no wish could change that. In a way it felt just that she should be denied such, something she actually wanted more than anything else and for the first time. It was in a way the ideal retribution. It wasn't even a question of if he would stay, his devotion was so plain there was no question about it, he'd gone against almost everything to save her life…now she knew why.

The questions bothering her instead was if he really ready to be with her? How could she know if she wouldn't' end up extinguishing the light she had come to like about him. How could she make him happy when she couldn't even do that for herself. She was still just getting used to these new emotions, how could she handle his when she was pathetic at her own. Wouldn't he be better off with one of his own? Someone that could actually understand…someone not so confused…

How did she know it was even real?

What she felt…

She was barely real herself, just a confused piece of machinery…how could she be sure…

That this time she could keep it.

If she let herself have him, if she deluded herself into thinking she even remotely deserved him would he be taken away from her like the life and memories she couldn't even remember having.

She deliberately kept her energy level low least he sense her silent approach. She wasn't sure he could do that in sleep but she wasn't willing to have him awake. She watched him thoughtfully. What was the alternative? A life without him? Did she want that…if she did what was she doing here then? Apart from Juunana, he was the only other person she could trust.

That was a revelation even to her.

When exactly had she come to feel she could trust him?

She'd always depended on herself, then Juunana when and only when she felt she couldn't handle it even though he was always there whether she needed him or not. But to trust someone else…was that wise?

She knelt beside the bed resting her chin on her hands. She was used to having one direction to her life…not a thousand and one. He stirred his eyes opening sleepily to behold her face. A sleepy smile crossed his face as his eyes closed again "you cold Juu? You can stay with me." He murmured touching the space next to him as he promptly dropped off again. She realised the drowsily given invitation probably wouldn't be remembered the next day but it had been given nonetheless…one that begged the highly significant question… Should she stay with him…? She smiled. Understanding this craziness may be confusing but it led down one single path… taking leaps of blind faith was what was unconditionally demanded and rebellion against it created the other paths of uncertainty and confusion. More accurately she should wonder if she was able to do that.

Krillin was rudely jolted awake by the jab in his stomach. The first thing he saw was the soft cornflour hair. Juuhachigou. He blinked confused and disoriented. He heard her mumble something and realised she was asleep…in his bed? He rose and turned on the bedside lamp looking down at her just as she moved again her hand narrowly missing his face. Something was wrong he could see it in the way she seemed to be shrinking into the bed, the expression on her face, the agitated movement of her eyes under her eyelids. He remembered the other time he'd seen her like this and realised it must be the same nightmare. Why she was in his bed was no longer the important question. "Juuhachi!" he called waking her bracing himself least he be flung half way across the room.

…No, this couldn't be happening…not to her. This couldn't just be it. She couldn't run any more…the nightmare was here and there was nowhere to run to, no one would come to help. She closed her eyes…

::somebody please help me::

A silent scream that only she knew she'd made. Her heart pounded against her chest…no escape…no way out. She wanted to get away from here; she wanted it more than anything. She closed her eyes…against those eyes, the ones that mocked her efforts at escape…against the nightmare threatening to engulf her…

::I'm not to make it easy for you:::

…if she could just get away…Then the brief chance at an escape, the escalating relief she felt…the elation of freedom.. Till the light had blinded her…till the darkness all around and then the realization of being absorbed alive. The sound of her voice wrapped round her mocking her attempts to cry out…it wasn't going anywhere…neither was she…it was trapped in with her. The sound of her own voice terrified her…she tried to scream but it was stuck in her throat…a throat that could no longer form words as it had frozen up in terror. She needed to…wanted to claw her way out so badly…needing to get free of him. She felt herself sinking beyond the reach of anyone…The horror of consciousness was more frightening than the despair of being lost and alone…Please…had she thought that or had she screamed it…it seemed one and the same now…the loud frantic beating of her heart was so loud she felt it was pounding in her head. The feeling of defeat was so close, too close. It had suddenly become a battle of wills, knowing that, feeling that if she gave into it then this would be it…but he was stronger, there was no point in trying to struggle, her arms were pinned to her side, she couldn't even move her legs…she couldn't move at all.

::End it…please ::

Everything seemed to be happening in agonizingly slow motion…the dawning horror of knowing no one could hear her, that no one would help…because no one could. The loss of the will to fight as it became apparent that it was too late…eyes closing to darkness…the final descent into the merciful unfeeling darkness that unconsciousness gave as the tightening in her chest became unbearable…it was ending…just like she wanted it to…

She woke sharply her mouth moving but no words come out, try as she might she couldn't move. Her sudden panic diminished quickly as she suddenly remembered where she was and who it was shaking her awake. She turned away quickly but it was too late. He'd seen the tears in her eyes already. He suddenly realised, with a slow dawning knowledge, why she'd been so quick to push him away before. She'd been crying then too. He also realised why he'd thought she'd mumbled something familiar, he knew the nightmare well. Only in his case he'd only been a spectator, she had lived it. He hopped out of bed but was back seconds later brandishing a glass of water. She was sitting up by the time he got back and she accepted it without meeting his gaze even when he slipped back into bed watching her.

"Go ahead and laugh." She finally said getting her voice back. He turned her to face him almost expecting her to resist. "Why would I do that?" he asked wiping away a teardrop before it could roll down her cheek. He looked at it in amazement.

"Why shouldn't you? I've done more than enough to warrant it."

He held her against him. She was as tense as they came and he thought for a moment she was going to push him away but she didn't. She didn't relax either. "It was just a bad dream." He said softly.

"I can't tell if it's real or not sometimes." She said her voice muffled against his hair. He rubbed her back gently; funnily enough she found it relaxing. He felt her sink against him slowly, it began from her chin as it slowly came down onto his shoulder filling the infinitesimally small gap that had existed before, as the tension seemed to drain away. She caught the fleeting thought before it disappeared.

::He smells…nice::

She smiled not even trying to rebel against the thought.

"I'm here now…he won't harm a hair on your head and neither will anyone else." He teased as her forehead came to rest against his, her hair falling forward, partly curtaining her face. She didn't need to ask who 'he' was. A blonde brow rose "What can you possibly do?"

"Everything I can or die trying." His tone may have been teasing but she didn't doubt he meant it. That was one thing she didn't think she would ever understand. Him…his feelings. How could he feel like that, how was it possible that he could have such feelings for her of all people. She'd probably hurt him more than anyone he'd come across. She was the cause of probably the most misery he'd suffered, he should rightly hate her, instead he was nice to her…no worse he loved her. It just didn't make sense. He didn't make sense. Neither did the emotion she felt surge through her when he kissed her. Just like before it was like having the world tipped out from under her.

"Krillin-" she began suddenly pulling away "I shouldn't have laughed."

He smiled brushing a stray lock of hair from her face, mainly just an excuse to touch her…an apology? From Juuhachi? "I forgot you did," he said innocently feigning ignorance. She could see what he was trying to do and it made her smile even as he pulled her back against him. He realised he should really be wondering what she was doing in his room but coherent thought flew out the window when her lips parted beneath his kiss. He needed no further invitation. The familiar feeling of being lost was ever present only this time he wasn't just lost, he was overwhelmed… by her touch as her arms went round him…the distinctively floral smell of her as she surrounded him…the feel of her as she pressed herself against him pulling him down with her. Every curve fit against him like she'd been made just for him. She completed him. He pulled back. Control was something he would always rapidly loose with her. One touch was enough to unravel him. She barely let him think straight. Her eyes opened as she sensed his uncertainty and their depths held a wealth of emotion he'd never expected to ever see in her eyes. It was in that moment that he knew she loved him. Really loved him. She may not ever say it to him but it was there, unmistakably and undeniably real. It was an entirely new person he was looking at at that moment. She was the most beautiful person in the world as she lay in his arms, cheeks tinged with colour, the passion he'd just awoken blazing brightly in the gaze that held his. The very same kind of need he was sure was reflected in his own gaze even as he hesitated silent questions in the eyes that held hers.

"Stop and I'll kill you." She said before he could voice any of them.

That sealed it.

He smiled and her arms tightened round him pulling him back against her. He didn't resist, he couldn't, he didn't want to. Later on neither would remember who'd made the first move but clothing was forgotten abandoned to the room. Where they fell they didn't know and didn't really care. She clung to him like he was her only hold on life itself, as if to not hold on tight enough would mean the loss of everything she had come to hold dear. It was a growing need between them to be closer than when merely bodies touched, a need to fill that part of them that till the advent of each other they hadn't known was empty or that each had the power to fill, to find, to know more about each in a way that words could all but insufficiently do. The attainment of that knowledge was something they cradled together simply listening to their raging heartbeats settle slowly as drowsiness took over.

He opened his eyes to find himself staring into her sleeping face just inches away from his. His gaze widened. He'd thought it had been a dream but the face next to his was real enough. Maybe…maybe they'd just fallen asleep. He lifted the cover a bit and dropped them like something hot. Nope, naked as jaybirds. He supposed the fact that she was asleep was a good thing. He didn't know what she would be like. Yesterday was yesterday and today was another day. She might have retreated back behind the facade she always wore or worse still she may regret what had happened. Somehow he didn't want to be here when she woke up. He didn't want to leave though, being so close to her was wonderful. To watch her sleeping face, admire her exquisite beauty and to remember the look he'd seen in her eyes. She loved him but was it something she would accept in the cold light of another day? He crawled out of bed reaching for his clothes as he did, when she did wake up maybe if he wasn't there it wouldn't be so awkward. He didn't dare breathe as he tip-toed towards the door. Later, he thought, later he would deal with her anger, when she'd had time to—

"Krillin?"

He froze his hand inches from the doorknob his left foot still in the act of doing a 'tip' but never quite completing the 'toe'.

"You know, if I didn't know any better I could swear you're ducking out on me. That's not a wise decision."

He was sure that was anger he'd heard in her voice and even as he turned he saw what he'd suspected. She was frowning dangerously.

"No, no, no." He said quickly going bright red. "It's not what it looks like see, because I was…well giving you time to…" he gave up realizing that what he'd thought made sense to him not long ago would only come out sounding like a lame excuse under her scrutiny so he simply trailed off into a sheepish laugh his hand going to his head. She suddenly started laughing, a low gentle sound. He looked confused for a moment. It took him by surprise for he certainly hadn't expected that.

"You should see the look on your face." She adopted a low seductive tone "Do I bite?"

"Well…no," The phrase 'red tomatoes' came to mind and didn't need to know why. He could feel his face lighting up again. "I just thought you would rather be alone." He said as her brows rose silently asking the question of how he could have come to that conclusion. She propped herself up on her elbow resting her chin on her hand. Pity he'd kind of liked the way she'd been laying down her hair scattered across the pillow.

"I seem to be missing my clothes." She said adopting a look of total innocence as her free hand went to her messy hair trying to coax it into a semblance of it's usual style but not succeeding. That look of total innocence almost floored him.

::She could do that?:: He thought in disbelief.

"And look where they are." She said gesturing to nightdress a few feet away from where he stood like she hadn't an inkling of how it had gotten there.

"So, Are you going to bring it to me or should I come over there and get it?" She asked in all seriousness after a moment of silence. His gaze widened. She was…under there-"No." he said far too quickly.

"To which one?" she asked only the tiniest smile showed she was enjoying herself immensely. There was no way he was going over there, he knew better than that, she'd just have to touch him and he'd be beside her in a second…

What was so wrong in that?

She needed time to think, that's what was wrong with it. He had to give her time to think. If she got up…he stopped.

"I'll just go make breakfast." He said quickly almost tripping over his words gesturing towards the door. He was sure he couldn't get any redder…wrong; he'd probably broken a record. She watched him leave amusement softening her features, She grinned as she bit her finger thoughtfully. He was a puzzle she was still trying to figure out…and she would figure him out. She smiled fondly as she thought about him. If she was feeling, right now, even half of what he'd felt when he'd made that wish then she could understand why he'd done it. She could even concede it was insufficiently explicable with words. She didn't want to be away from him for even a minute. She jumped out of bed dragging the sheets along with her.

"Hey Krillin!"

Krillin turned as Roshi, Umigame and Oolong filed into the living room. "You're back?"

"Yep." Roshi said "I decided you might want company, enough sulking, I thought we could make you forget her… or at least we're going to try. Oooh, breakfast!" he said dropping his bag into the chair and taking a seat. Oolong was beside him in a second. They just seemed to assume the two-plate spread was for them. Then again he was sure he'd made too much in the first place as he hadn't been totally concentrating on what he'd been doing. Umigame shook his head then turned to Krillin. "So she came back then?" Krillin nodded unable to hold back the smile that lit up his face.

"Told you," He said suddenly indicating the two stuffing their faces. "They've ruined your breakfast though."

Krillin shrugged "I wasn't really hungry anyway." He said. "Though I don't know about Juuhachi." He added loudly. Master Roshi froze in the act of lifting a piece of toast. " Juuhachigou's here, you mean she came back? And you guys were alone and everything. Way to go Krillin!" he leered.

" I meant you're eating her breakfast." He said gesturing to the nearly empty plate as he succeeded in keeping the colour from his cheeks. Oolong was quick to realize that this meant he'd got Krillin's breakfast and he was equally quick in pointing out that Roshi would be in a lot of trouble where he on the other hand had nothing to worry about. Krillin gave a disapproving frown at this assumption.

"Oh…I'm sure she won't mind." Roshi said laughing on a mouthful of toast.

"Why don't you ask and find out." Juuhachigou asked from the door way were she stood her gaze unwavering, her tone holding the famous air of disdain. Shower-kissed she was still the most beautiful person in the world, Krillin thought lazily.

"Argh!" Roshi almost chocked startled. "Krillin make more, make more." He said quickly. Her gaze turned to include Krillin and he turned red. "I'm not hungry." She said to him her hand going to her damp hair as the barest hint of a smile touched her lips. Roshi sighed relived.

"Oh and Krillin…" the smile was still minute but it was now definitely present.

"Yeah?"

"Yes" She said leaving. He was confused. Yes? What was she talking about? He couldn't help but feel he was missing something here, something important but he couldn't remember.

"So?" Roshi asked after she'd left. "Did she come back or did you have to find her?"

"Turns out she left a note."

"She did?" Roshi repeated obviously trying to think of Juuhachigou and a note in the same sentence. "I just didn't see it."

"Lets hope she doesn't decide to take off anymore or he just might fall apart all over again" Oolong said teasingly. Roshi laughed, "At this rate he might as well marry the woman."

Like a slap across the face he suddenly got it. He remembered what she'd said yes to.

She'd said yes.

She was actually agreeing to marry him.

He decided to make sure.

"Did Juuhachi just say yes?" Krillin asked out loud.

"hmm, Juuhachi is it now" Oolong leered.

"Yeah. Weird that…to say yes like that for no reason." Roshi said sitting back sated. Umigame looked disapprovingly at him. Didn't it occur to him that other people would have liked to have some breakfast as well? There was absolutely nothing left.

He hadn't imagined it then.

"Yes!" he said out loud hurrying off.

Roshi looked at Oolong questioningly.

Oolong shrugged.

Umigame simply smiled to himself.

He found her in the spare room sitting on the bed her legs folded as she brushed her damp hair. If she'd noticed him enter she didn't show it. She looked so young and teenage-like, different even, that he was unsure if this Juuhachigou was the same one that had single handily taken out Vegeta. She felt his arms slide round her waist and felt her heart beat quicken but she said nothing and continued brushing her hair sending flashes of rose scented water into his face. He didn't care after all he knew that beneath this façade there lay a woman that was beautiful in as well as out and loved him as much as he did her though she wouldn't say so. That there was a woman, not a machine but a woman in every sense of the word, willing to stay with him forever. The most beautiful creature alive and she'd chose him. "I love you" he said against her hair. His voice held such feeling and such open honesty that it was impossible for there to be any doubt as to the way he felt. She stopped brushing. "Krillin?"

"hmm…?"

"Remember when I called you an old man?" She felt him smile against her hair. He nodded. "I was wrong, you are an incredibly stupid old man." She said a little smile of her own touching her lips. He had to be to want to spend the rest of his life with her. "But," he pointed out " I am your incredibly stupid old man…if you'll keep me." Nothing could dampen that smile of his.

"I said yes didn't I," She said after a while turning in his arms to face him. He'd coloured again as he found the familiar emotion in her eyes, the same gaze she'd bestowed on him last night, the very same one that he had relinquished his control to and the one he'd mentally dubbed the 'I-love-you' look. She kissed him surrounding him with the smell of roses as she pushed him down with her even as he protested.

"Master Roshi's in—" he began weakly.

She deliberately choose not to inform him of the little fact that Roshi would never set foot near the room when she was in it. In a tiny little moment not too long ago, but weeks before, she'd made it perfectly clear… right after showing him what attempting to peep through a keyhole could get him.

"Then you'll have to be extremely quiet."

Me? He questioned mentally. She'd engaged his lips before he could say anything at the mischievous glint he'd caught in her eyes just before they'd closed.

~End~

***…I apologize for the mistakes in the first part (I'm really sorry), and now for any mistakes here too, I did try to find them, went over it a thousand and one times I did. (just blame it on too much school work but don't laugh please!) And, I want to thank everyone who reviewed my last one…you guys are great (all of you). I only hope this part lived up to your expectations and if it didn't then I will try harder next time…I promise. Erm…CsHayden, did I use less chunky paragraphs this time? (thank you for your suggestion) Oh, and Chris I'm sorry, if you did come back to finish it then I hope this part was worth the wait. Thanks to you too Swiss Army Knife…you're sooo good at writing and then you come along and read mine and I'm like wow! (*Covers mouth*) I talk too much…

Aymei

xxx