PoK
Episode 1: Snubbull: I choose you!
My Poke`mon are gonna be the best,
Like Mewtwo never was,
I will train them very hard,
To make em` as strong as Gyrados!
I'll travel through Oak's Lab,
Serching for my mum,
If my Poke`mon ever wins,
I will tell them "Well done!"
PoKe`MoN!
Gotta Catch Em` All!
Oh It's you and me,
Can you tell your Primeape to let me free?
PoKe`MoN!
Gotta Catch Em` All!
If you were my best friend,
You would free me from this Charmeleon!
PoKeMoN!
Gotta Catch Em` All!
Oh, Dexter is telling the truth,
That dogs do say WOOF,
You tease me and I'll hang you from the roof!
PO KAY MON!
Gotta Catch Em`
Gotta Catch Em`
Gotta Catch Em` ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!
(Some gameboy images appear of a Magikarp fighting a Zapdos. The Zapdos keeps trying to hit Magikarp with electricity but it keeps missing. The Magikarp then lunges towards a Zapdos and the Gameboy pictures turn into real life!)
Announcer: And Magikarp uses it's tackle attack! But Zapdos used it's powerfull Thunder attack! MAGIKARP IS DOWN!
(Some shadowy trainer withdraws Magikarp into a green pokeball and sends out..)
Announcer: Agumon! The trainer sent out Agumon! This pokemon is a- HEY! THAT'S A DIGIMON! KILL HIM!!!!!
(All the trainers in the crowd shoot the shadowy trainer)
Announcer: I meant the digimon!
Everone in crowd: Oh!
(It turns out that Ash is watching T.V. Ash suddenly jumps up whith a toy Snorlax in his hand)
Ash: I, Ashton Dililah Samual Oak Ketchum, declare myself the greatest pokemon trainer ever!!!! Even through I haven't even started!
(He throws the snorlax like a Poke`ball and it hit's Mrs. Ketchum in the face knocking her out!)
Ash:(whistling) La la la la!
(Ash walks over to his bed and changes the channel)
Professor Oak: Hi! I'm Samual Oak! You might remember me from such shows as "Giving out angry pikachus Part 3: How to avoid the police" and "Fucking Mrs. Ketchum" Well today I'm going to show you somthing REALLY incredible!
(Professor Oak walks up to a table with three poke`balls on it. He picks up the first one.)
Professor Oak: This is Meouth! It's a water type poke`mon! It's attacks are Scratch, Tackle and Payday!
(Professor Oak picks up the second pokeball)
Professor Oak: The second pokemon is Meouth! It is a fire type poke`mon! It's attacks are Tackle, Payday and Scratch!
(Professor Oak picks up the third one)
Professor Oak: This pokemon is Meouth! It is a grass type! It's attacks are Payday, Scratch and Tackle!
(Professor Oak puts down the pokeballs)
Professor Oak: But if you come in too late you can have the special spare pokemon. I'm not elling what it is, but I'll give you a clue: It starts with "S" and rhymes with rubble!
Ash: Um, starts with "S" and rhymes with rubble? That would make it, um, uh, ah, er, um, er, uh METAPOD! YEAH! METAPOD IS STRONG! Hey Mum, don't bother about waking me up! I'm gonna sleep in and get Metapod! The strongest pokemon ever! Mum?
(Ash suddenly remembers that his mum is uncousios)
(In the middle of the night Ash is dreaming about the next day.)
Ash: GO METAPOD!
(A Metapod comes out of the pokeball Ash is holding his hand. Of course Ash has no idea what Metapod or Pokeballs look like so he imagines Metapod being a severed foot, and the pokeball being Prince Charles!)
(In the Morning, Ash wakes up. Well it isn't really morning it's 6:00pm two months from now! Well, he was planning on sleeping in!)
Ash: What time is it?
(Ash looks at his watch, it says 6:00pm)
Ash: Oh, it's 9:00am, too early, better go back to sleep!
(Ash goes back to sleep. He wakes up two years later)
Ash: Uh, what time is it?
(He looks at his watch. It's says 1:57am
Ash: 4:30 pm! OH NO! I didn't mean to sleep that late! Better get going!
(Ash runs outside in his Psyduck boxer shorts! He runs into a tree)
Ash: It's very dark this afternoon!
(Ash finally get to Professor Oak's a day later after running around in circles for ages!
Ash:(knocking on the door) Hello? Proffesor Oak? Are you in there?
Professor Oak: Coming!
(Professor Oak comes out with his lab coat back to front and his hair all ruffles up!
Ash: Sorry, I'm late Professor, but I slept in a little!
Proffesor Oak: A little?
Ash: Yeah! I also had a cool dream eher I got all 150 gym badges and all 8 pokemon and became a digimon master!!
Proffesor Oak: Uh, Yeah! Well do you want your pokemon!
Ash: YEAH! Is it the special one that starts with "S" and rhymes with rubble?
Proffesor Oak: Here you go!
Ash: GO METAPOD!
Snubbull: Snub?
Ash: YAY! METAPOD! It's just like I had imagined it! Come here metapod!
(Snubbull walks over to Ash)
Ash: Your the best pokemon in the whole world Metapod!
Professor Oak: That's a Snubbull!
Ash: No, it's a Metapod!
Professor Oak: IT"S A SNUBBULL!
Ash: IT"S A METAPOD!
Professor Oak: LISTEN TO ME BOY!
Ash: SHUT UP OR I'LL SHOVE THIS POKEDEX UP YOUR ASS!!
Professor Oak: That's the GS Ball! Besides I've had it shoved up my ass tons of times!
Ash: Oh! Come on Metapod! Lets go!
Snubbull: Snubbull! Snub!
(Ash and Snubbull walk outside)
Gary: Oh, look it's Ashy-Boy! Hey Ash! Did you sleep in a little?
Ash: It was only a few hours!
Gary: Yeah, A "few" hours
Cheerleaders: Gary, Gary, He's the Best! He gives us all splended sex!
Gary: I'M ALREADY A POKE`MON MASTER!!!! HA HA HA HA HA!!!!
Cheerleaders: Gary, Gary, he's a pokemon master! Next time he'll get there faster!
Gary: BYE ASHY-BOY!
(Gary drives away in his pick-up truck)
Ash: Oh I hate that Gary!
Snubbull: Snub! Snubbull!
Ash: Your right Metapod! Lets go!
(Ash and Snubbull are walking through a forest. Suddenly a muk appears. It starts raping Snubbull!)
Ash: Hey! Get off Metapod!
Muk: MUUUK!!!!
Ash: Okay! POKE`BALL! GO!
(Ash throws Dexter at Muk. It knocks him out!)
Dexter: Ow! I'm a Pokedex, not a pokeball!
Ash: Sorry Dexter!
Dexter:(muttering) Stupid dumbass trainer!
Ash: What was that?
Dexter: Uh, I said: That Muk is down! Hurry up and catch it!
Ash: OKAY! POKE`BALL GOOO!!!!!
Dexter: You threw me again dumbass!
Ash: Sorry! Um, what do pokeballs look like?
Dexter: Geez! Pokeballs are the red and white things your carrying!
Ash: What shape are they?
Dexter: There spheres!
(Ash gets a Red and White spear out of his pocket and throws it at Muk! Muk dies!
Dexter: A sphere, not a spear!
Ash: Oh! What's a sphere?
Dexter: A ball!
Ash: Oh! What's a ball?
Dexter: Jesus christ! I'll just show you a picture of it on my screen!
(A picture of a pokeball appears on the screen!)
Ash: Oh those! I thought those were rare candys! I fed one to that charazard over there!
(A butterfree flies past, choking)
Ash: Well I better start catching stuff!
(Ash throws a pokeball at a primeape!)
Primeape: Prime?
(Primeape starts beating the crap out of Ash!)
Dexter: Um, Ash? You have to battle the pokemon first, Buttmunch!
Ash: Oh! Metapod! GO! Use uh, Fire Blast!
(Snubbull who can, luckilly speak moron, use it's scratch)
Snubbull: SNUBBULL!!!!
Primeape: PRIMEAPE!!!!
(Primeape, being a coward, runs away)
(Ash and Snubbull get to a lake! Theirs a sign that says "Gyrados will attack if you get in the water!)
Ash: Hey theres a sign! Lets see what it says Metapod!
(Ash, being half illitirate, only reads the part that says "Gyrados will attack")
Ash: OH NO! Hey Dexter, what's a Gyrados?
(A picture of Golem comes up on Dexter's screen)
Dexter:(official voice) Gyrados! The hard rock pokemon! This pokemon is weak against water and will die if it touches it!
Ash: Okay Metapod! Lets go into the lake! We'll be safe there!
Dexter: Hee Hee Hee!!
(Ash and Snubbull jump into the lake! About 1000 Gyrados stick their there heads out of the water!
Ash: Oh No!!!!
Snubbull: SNUUUUUUUUB!!!!!!!!!
Ash: Metapod! Use explosion!
(Snubbull uses bite on the biggest Gyrados!)
Gyrados: HA HA HA!!!!!
(All the Gyrados chase after Ash and Snubbull!)
Ash: Help!!!!!!! Dexter what are we going to do!!!!!!!!
Dexter:(scared shitless) Please! Whatever you do! DON'T throw me at that!
(Ash and Snubbull keep swimming until they get to a boat with Misty in it! She's fishing! Ash climbs into the boat, throws Misty out, and rows away! Misty gets devoured by the Gyrados!)
Ash: YAY! WERE GOING TO ESCAPE NOW!
(Ash's boat falls down a waterfall, it smashes and Ash and Snubbull try to swim away!)
Dexter: Ash! There is something I have to tell you which I will probably never be able to tell you)
Ash: What is it?
Dexter: I hate you Ash!
Ash: I hate you too Dexter!
(The Gyrados corner Ash!)
Ash:(holding his hands up in the air) C'mon, er, pokemon! COME AND GET ME!!!
(The Gyrados charge at Ash and rip him to bits!)
Snubbbul: SNUBUUUUUUUUUUUULL!!!
(The music that allways happens when some good happens comes on and Snubbull jumps in front of Ash and uses it's scary face attack)
All the Gyrados: MWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH!!!
(The Gyrados die of laughter!)
(It's the morning. Ash wakes up with snubbull next to him)
Ash: We did it!
Snubbull: Snub. Snubbull.
(A pidgy flies past)
Ash: Dexter! Analyse!
Dexter: Screw you!
Ash: Wow even dexter doesn't know what it it! It must be rare!
(Ash and Pikachu walk down the Viridian city!)
The Poke`rap!
My pokemon gonna be best,
Like mewtwo never was,
Train `em very hard,
So their strong as gyrados!
Diglet, Meouth, Totodile, Digimon,
Slowpoke, Psyduck, Mewthree and Yokomon!
We will travel through Oaks lab,
Lookin` for me mum,
My pokemon's gonna win,
I'm gonna say well done!
Misty, Ash, Tracey and Snorlax,
Hitmonlee, Himonchan, Hitmontop and Ex-Lax!!!
17225262627 and more to see,
To be a master of pokemon is my destiny
PO KAY MON!!
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