PoK
Episode 2: Poke`Mon Robbery!
My Poke`mon are gonna be the best,
Like Mewtwo never was,
I will train them very hard,
To make em` as strong as Gyrados!
I'll travel through Oak's Lab,
Serching for my mum,
If my Poke`mon ever wins,
I will tell them "Well done!"
PoKe`MoN!
Gotta Catch Em` All!
Oh It's you and me,
Can you tell your Primeape to let me free?
PoKe`MoN!
Gotta Catch Em` All!
If you were my best friend,
You would free me from this Charmeleon!
PoKeMoN!
Gotta Catch Em` All!
Oh, Dexter is telling the truth,
That dogs do say WOOF,
You tease me and I'll hang you from the roof!
PO KAY MON!
Gotta Catch Em`
Gotta Catch Em`
Gotta Catch Em` ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!
(Ash is running to Viridian City with Snubbull)
Ash: It's okay Metapod! You'll be okay!
(Officer Jenny rides her motocycle into Ash)
Ash: Hey! You flattened my Metapod!
Officer Jenny: HEY! YOU PUT A SCRATCH INTO MY BRAND NEW MOTOCYCLE! YOU UNDER ARREST!
(A lady runs up to Jenny)
Lady: Help Officer! My kids bike was stolen!
Officer Jenny: Shut up, I'm busy!
(A fat man runs up to Jenny)
Fat Man: Help Officer! My store was robbed!
Officer Jenny: Does it occur to you that I'm dealing with something a tad more impotant?
(A teenager runs up to Officer Jenny)
Teenager: Help Officer! My best friend was murdered!
Officer Jenny: I've got more important things right now!!! Now your punishment for hurting my por widdle bike is...
(Officer Jenny beats the shit out of Ash with her baton and rides away)
Ash:Ow!!!! Come on Metapod! Lets go to the Pokemon Centre!
Snubbull: Snubbull!
(A savagely beaten Ash and Snubbull limp to the Pokemon Centre)
Nurse Joy: We don't treat humans here.
Ash: No, it's my Metapod! It's hurt!
(Ash gives Snubbull to Nurse Joy)
Nurse Joy: Oh the poor thing! WHAT DID YOU DO TO IT! YOU SHOULD LEARN TO BE A BETTER TRAINER!
Ash: It's not my fault! Officer Jenny ran over it!
(Officer Jenny rides into the Pokemon Centre, beats the shit out of Ash with her Baton, and rides off!)
Ash: Oww!!!
Nurse Joy: Just give the friggen pokemon to me!
Ash: Okay! Here you go, Metapod!
Snubbull: Snub... Ull...
(Meanwhile in the outskirts of Viridian City, a very battered Misty is limped into the town with the shattered remains of her boat in her hands)
Misty: I'll get that kid if it is the last thing I do!
(In the pokemon centre, Ash is looking at a poster with Selebii, Lugia, Ho-oh and Mew on it)
Ash: (pointing at the Mew) I think I've seen that pokemon before!
(Ash has a flashback of the pidgy he saw flying past on the first episode)
Ash: Yeah! It looked exactly like it!
Phone: RING RING RING! RING RING RING! PHONE CALL! PHONE CALL! RING RING RING! RING RING RING! PHONE CALL! PHONE CALL! I hate my job!
Ash: (Picking up phone) Hallo?
Professor Oak: Hi Ash! I was hoping to talk to you!
Ash: Who are you?
Professor: Ash! Don't you remember! I'm Professor Oak! I gave you your pokemon!
Ash (Trying to remember!) uh, um, uh, er, um, er, ee, um, erm, ah, eh, eee, um...
(1 hour later)
Ash: uh, um, eee, er... WAIT! I KNOW! YOU'RE MY MUM! HI MUM!!
Professor Oak: I am not your mum!
Ash: Hey Mum! I saw a really rare pokemon! It looked like this:
(Ash points to the picture of Selebii!)
Professor Oak: You couldn't of possibly seen that! You suck as a trainer!
Ash: Thanks for the encouragement Mum!
(Nurse Joy walks into the room)
Nurse Joy: Hey kid! You've been on that phone for an hour! Get off before we go broke!
Professor Oak: Joy, I called him!
Nurse Joy: Oh! Okay then!
Professor Oak: Psst! Ash, don't tell her I'm calling collect from a mobile!
Ash: Nurse! He said he was calling collect from a mobile!
Nurse Joy: Why that old fuck! I'm gonna kill him!
Professor Oak: Um, Ash? I'm gonna go now! Bye!
Ash: Bye Mum!
(Ash walks into the waiting room)
Misty: There you are you little ass! I'm gonna kill you!
Ash: What did I do!
Misty: You destroyed my boat! Now I'll have to kill you!
Ash: What's a boat?
Misty: It's what I have in my hands you moron!
Ash: That looks like broken bits of metal!
Misty: It's wood!
Ash: What's wood?
Misty: FORGET IT!
Ash: Forget what?
Misty: Jesus!
(Suddenly the skylight breaks! Two people and a pokemon come in)
Person1: To protect the world from our nation!
Person2: To unite all people with devastation!
Person1: To denounce the evils of truth above!
Person2: To extend our wrath to the stars we love!
Person1: Yas Leader!
Person2: Kas Leader!
Yas Leader: Team YasKas blasts off at the sight of a fight!
Kas Leader: Surrender now at the speed of light!
Koffing: KOFFING! THAT'S RIGHT!
Ash: Who are you!
Koffing: We just introduced ourselves! KOFFING!
Ash: What does introduce mean?
Nerdy school guy: Introduce: Verb. One: to bring into notice, knowledge, use, etc! Two: To bring forward for considiration:, as a bill in parliament! Three: to present or bring forward with mateirial that explains or prepares for the main part! Four: To bring (someone) to the knowledge or experience of something (followed by to)! Five: To lead, bring, or put into a place, surroundings, etc! Six: to bring (a person) to meet another; present!
Koffing: Uh, yeah! You can read the entire dictionary later, pal! We have a job to do!
Kas leader: We do?
Nerdy school guy: WOW! A talking koffing! Can I have your autograph?
Ash: What's an autograph?
N.S.G.: Autograph: Noun: One: a-
Koffing: Cram it spock!
(Koffing shoots out tons of gas at N.S.G.! N.S.G dies!
Nurse Joy: Kid! Your pokemon is healed!
Ash: YAY! METAPOD!
Yas Leader: Give us all your pokemon!
Ash: No way! I'm not giving you my pokedex!
Pokedex: Please give me to them! PLEASE!
Yas leader: We don't want your pokedex! GO ELECTABUZZ!!
Kas Leader: GO SCYTHER!!
Nurse Joy: Quick! In here!
(Ash, Misty, Snubbull and Nurse Joy hide into the back room)
Nurse Joy: Okay! We have to transport all my crack before those people steal it!
Misty: Actully, I don't think they are after your crack!
Nurse Joy: Then what are they trying to steal!
Misty: Maybe the pokemon, Dumbass!
Nurse Joy: DON'T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT!! NOW TRANSPORT ME CRACK!!!
Ash: What's crack?
N.S.G.: Crack. Noun. One: A large hole in the-
Nurse Joy: Your supposed to be dead!
N.S.G: Oh yeah! (he disappears)
(Ash, Misty and Snubbull transport all the crack through the teleport thingys to another pokemon centre)
(An hour later)
Nurse Joy: Done! Now those crooks can't steal anything
(Ash, Misty, Snubbull and Nurse Joy walk out into the waiting room. Team YasKas are gone, but there is a bomb with a note on it)
Misty: (Reading the note) Ha Ha Ha! We stole the all the pokemon! Ha Ha Ha Ha! Signed-Team YasKas! See! I told you they weren't after the crack!
Nurse Joy: So what!
(Then the bomb explodes)
(Ash, Misty, Snubbull, Nurse Joy and the phones miraculously survive the explosion! Nurse Joy calls the pewter city Nurse Joy)
V.C. Nurse Joy: Did you get my crack!
P.C. Nurse Joy: Yeah! But that Porygon in the teleport thingy stole some!
V.C. Nurse Joy: Damn!
(In Viridian Forest)
Ash: Wow! Look at all the pokemon!
Misty: Ahhhhh!!!! Ash!!!!! That's a digimon!!!!!!
Ash: A what?
Misty: A digimon!!!
Digimon: Hallo! My name is Yokomon! I will serve and protect you!!
Ash: Cool!!!!! POKEBALL!!! GO!!!!
The Poke`rap!
My pokemon gonna be best,
Like mewtwo never was,
Train `em very hard,
So their strong as gyrados!
Bill Clinton, Al Gore, Gorge Bush and Snorlax,
Dracula, Frankenstein, Freddy and Shaq!
I'll travel through Oaks lab,
Lookin` for me mum,
My pokemon's gonna win,
I'm gonna say well done!
Bulbasaur, Ivysaur, Venusaur and Pokedex,
Nappa, Vegita, Raditz and a T-Rex
17225262627 and more to see,
To be a master of pokemon is my destiny
PO KAY MON!!
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