Author Notes: Hey! This chapter is dedicated to Angel Johnston, who has motivated me again and again, to finish this story! Thanks! Also… that situation with Mamoru and the stripper was from ER, in case anyone will accuse me of plagiarism. Oh! Almost your Angel… heh, what can I say? I got caught up with going back to school. And to Sailor Debbie thanks about that note about reviews, but it did remind me I was getting a little hot-headed… thanks for planting my feet back on the ground, where they should be.
Disclaimer: … no, I do not own Sailor Moon – but I do own a stuffed cat named Truffles! ^_~
•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º
Usa… where are you? A man of twenty-nine thought to himself, as he sat at his desk, pretending to do important paperwork. After Usagi had left him nearly ten years ago, Mamoru's life had become terribly lonely, and depressing. Nonetheless – he threw himself into studying and was now one of the best heart surgeons in the world. Yet at times… the surgeon thought he might die of heartbreak, the loss of his Usa-chan too great to bear. Rather ironic, Mamoru reflected grimly, that one of the best heart surgeons in the world feel he should die of heartbreak.
When an outline of a figure approached, paired with the sound of clicking stiletto shoes, Mamoru broke out of his reverie and attempted to appear completely engrossed in his work. A knock came at his office door, followed by a "Come in," from Mamoru.
"Dr. Chiba – there's a, 'Chad Winston' here to see you? He doesn't have an appointment, but he insisted that he speak with you." A young girl in her early twenties informed, her brown eyes filled with worry. She really shouldn't have interrupted Doctor Chiba…
"Ah! My good friend Chad! Send him in… thanks Hikari. Please hold all my calls for the next half hour." Mamoru replied, suddenly cheered up by the surprise visit. Hikari nodded, relieved, and silently left the room.
A tall man with long, shaggy hair walked in, a devilish grin on his face that troubled Mamoru gravely. The last time he had seen that look on Chad, was three months ago on his birthday, when he left his supposed 'cousin' in the surgeon's care – claiming she had a heart problem that demanded only the best treatment. He remembered it like it was yesterday…
"Doctor Chiba – Miss Winston needs your immediate attention! She has recently gone into a series of hip convulsions, and we think it is rather serious." A nurse had told him, yet she had been too calm then, as Mamoru noted afterwards.
Mamoru, concerned for Chad's cousin, had hurried to her room, to see her wriggling like a worm underneath the covers. Mamoru moved in for a closer inspection – he had never seen anything like it.
"Doctor! I just can't stop wriggling!" Chad's cousin had exclaimed, and she continued wiggling – until the covers had fallen to her ankles, to reveal an extremely tiny bikini that seemed to cover only her nipples, (yet that didn't really do much – the bikini was transparent) and an equally small thong, transparent as well. It was then she leaped in front of Mamoru – grinding her pelvis and breast against Mamoru.
Mamoru
jaw had fallen to the floor, as the stripper sang the words to "Happy Birthday"
to him. She finished with a whisper of
"From your good friend, Chad" – and was
reaching behind her to unclasp her bikini when Mamoru blushed a bright
cherry red and exclaimed that there would be no further need of her.
The
stripper protested – exclaiming she had been paid very generously as long as
she promised Mamoru a good time. If it was possible, Mamoru blushed an even
brighter hue of red, and quickly ran out of the room, ready to pummel Chad into
a bloody pulp.
So
it was no surprise that Mamoru should be worried – when Chad had that look, you
knew you had to be careful… extremely careful.
"What
do you want, Chad?" Mamoru asked, a hint of fear in his voice truly frightened
of Chad's wild schemes to hook him up. The shaggy-haired friend would often
complain about Mamoru's supposed vow of celibacy, (it means to never have sex)
and had been determined to help him find some fun.
"Is
that fear I hear in your voice? Come on Chiba! It was a birthday
present! A very thoughtful one too, might I add, considering you have
the mating habits of a plant." Mamoru glared at Chad. "Alright, alright! So you
hate women! I get the point!" Chad quickly added, fearing the raven-haired
man's wrath.
"I don't hate women
per say – I just don't want to set myself up for more pain." Mamoru retorted.
"Just when you think you have a stable relationship, they'll run out on you,
confuse the hell out of your already damaged mind, fly off to another country,
and not once attempt to reconcile your relationship. NO! Not one damn
word in ten years! Do you know why?" Mamoru yelled at Chad, the brunette
cowering at Mamoru sudden outburst.
"…Uh, no. Why?" Chad asked,
trembling under his friend's fierce stare.
"…Because they're mad! Stark
raving mad!"
"Ok
there…" Chad mumbled, wondering what that sudden outburst was about. He
suddenly remembered the reason he was meeting Mamoru in the first place, and
decided it a brilliant idea to change the topic.
"Anyways!
To answer your question – I need your help."
"Oh?
What kind of help?" Mamoru replied, suspicious.
"Well,
you see… while my boss and I were negotiating a possibly promotion, the big
charity gala the company's throwing came up. Anyways, The boss was mentioning
how his mother had a friend flying in from America – the CEO of some big
company they want to merge with."
"Get
to the point," Mamoru interjected.
"Fine!
I sortoftoldmybossyou'dbeherescorttothegala." Chad said rather quickly.
"You
what?!" the infuriated man roared, positively livid
"I
told my boss you'd be her escort to the gala." The man repeated
"Let
me get this straight… you used me as a bargaining chip to further your climb up
the executive ladder?! What am I? Am I some sort of pawn to you?"
"Come
on Mamoru! I'll make it up to you! Anything! Just name it! I'll do everything
in my power to do it! Just please do this for me! My boss will kill me
if you bail out now, not to mention demotion me – or worse, fire me! You
wouldn't want your old buddy Chad to end up on the streets, do you?" Chad
pleaded, desperate.
"Alright."
"Please!
Haven't I been a good friend, a – " Chad stopped, confused, "what did you say?"
"I
said alright… in our English language, that means I agree, and that you can
stop this pathetic plea now. But by all means, continue if you're enjoying
yourself." He said.
"Thanks
dude! You're the best friend ever! Just say the word, anything you
want…" the man rambled on happily
"I
want you to cut your hair." Mamoru's eyes were positively gleaming with
delight, a crooked grin at his mouth. He would finally have his revenge… Chad's
hair was his life, and he adored his shaggy look to no ends.
"You
want me to what?"
"You
heard me… get a decent haircut. Where your hair doesn't fall to your shoulders,
and none of it covers your eyes. Oh, and lose the sideburns too. I'm tired of
walking down the street with you, and having people stare at me because I'm
with some punk kid who hasn't had a haircut since the eighties." Mamoru
continued, enjoying himself. He glanced at Chad, whom's jaw had dropped to the
floor in horror. "And if you don't get your hair cut, I will escort that
girl, and make such an ass of myself your boss will fire you for setting his
mother's friend up with a fiend.
Chad
stared at him blankly for a few moments in disbelief, then sighed when he saw
the determined look on his friend. He wouldn't be able to get out of this one.
Defeated, he nodded, shook his head, then replied, "Dude… you are some friend."
"Thanks,
it's one of my many virtues," the doctor replied, smiling at his own
deviousness.
That night, at the Crystal Tokyo Hotel…
Ring Ring the telephone rang, urging someone to pick it up. "Damion… could you get that please? I'm sort of indispensable at the moment." A women of twenty-four yelled out to her ten-year-old son, as she cautiously applied her make-up. Oh god… what if Aunty set me up with some sex fiend that will attempt to seduce? Or worse yet, what if she sets me up with a guy that looks exactly like Mamoru. The blonde shuddered at the thought, eyes getting teary at the memory:
"What a fool I've been…
I should have known you were a whore. So tell me, did you sleep with the high
school boys too? Because God knows how you won that Ice Queen Competition… Get
out of the car you slut – no need to worry about paying the taxi driver. We
wouldn't want you to bother taking off your clothes." I know I deserved some
hate, but why did you have to lash out on me like that?
"Sure
mom!" a miniature version of Mamoru Chiba, name Endymion (Damion for short)
exclaimed, as he lifted the impatient telephone – bringing an end to its
demanding rings.
"Hello?"
A cheerful boy asked.
"Hello
dear, could you please tell your mother that her escort will arrive in half an
hour. I'll be over in an hour myself to baby-sit you." An endearing, motherly
voice said.
Damion
wrinkled his nose in confusion. "But if her escort arrives in half an hour, and
you're arriving in an hour, that means… I'll be alone for half an hour." The
other line laughed, quite amused.
"Well,
my dear, you know how your mother is. Always half an hour late… so if we tell
her he's coming a half hour early…"
"…
Then she'll be ready when he finally does come! Aunt Mary, you're brilliant!
For the first time in her life, Mother may actually be on time!" the boy
exclaimed, delighted to know they would be tricking Mother.
"Alright
then dearie, Ja!"
"Ja
ne!" replied the young boy
Damion
put down the phone, then informed his mother of when her date would be
arriving. A loud, panicked scream erupted from the room she was in, and Damion
was soon flooded in a whirlwind of questions from his mother.
"Ohmigosh, Ohmigosh! Damion, does my hair look all right? Damn hair… honey, could you pass me some gel? How about my makeup? Is it too much - too little? Do I look painted? What about my dress?" Usagi asked, quite frantic at the moment. As she said this, she whirled around the hotel room, muttering to herself about 'inventing a time machine'. An hour later, Usagi huffed out a sigh of relief, glanced at her watch in a languid manner, and shrieked once again. "Half an hour late! Where is he? Did he stand me up? Did he happen to find a picture of me and decide I was ugly? Did he come in, take a glance at me and was so thoroughly disgusted that…"
"… That he should be here any minute now, since I had suggested that your son tell you your date was coming half an hour late, so you'd be early for once in your life?" An amused voice rang out. Both heads turned toward the voice, which was none other than their "Aunty Mary". She was a petite woman, and yet despite her white hair and wrinkled face, had eyes that twinkled of mirth, and reflected a sense of youth, despite her obvious old age.
"Aunt Mary! You were right! Mommy is on time now!" Damion exclaimed, leaping into the arms of the old woman's arms. His mother only smiled wryly, mumbling about 'cruel old people' that had 'no sense of mercy'. Aunt Mary only smiled, and Usagi just couldn't help grinning back.
"Devious Hag" She mouthed to her, then chuckled as she saw her aunt clutch her left breast, feigning horror at being called such a thing.
Suddenly, the ring of the doorbell informed Usagi her date was here. Scrambling out of her seat at the couch, she slipped on her coat, slung her back over her shoulder, and flung the door open. Her jaw fell with a 'thud', as her eyes popped out of their sockets. She blinked once, and then blinked once more. It was then she collapsed to the floor – Usagi had fainted.
Just as Mamoru bent down to aide the fallen blonde, a streak of black slammed into him, and began a series of punches and kicks. Mamoru had just peeled the 'thing' off him, when he felt just about ready to faint as well… there, with eyes glaring defiantly then widening in sudden shock, was the face of Mamoru himself, on the head of a ten-year-old boy.
•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º¤~•~¤º*ˆ*º
Author Notes: Heh! Aren't I simply devious? Lol… I was going to start a new fanfic, but decided to finish this off, because I know how simply irritating it is to have an author with a bunch of great, UNFINISHED work. I will tell you now… though I may take ahem longer than usually to update, mind you, I WILL update. I will never abaondon a sotyr. Frankly, I think that's just plain cruel.
Help me out though… give me some motivation… you know what you can do? REVIEW! What? You didn't hear me the first time? Alright… I'll say it again! REVIEW, REVIEW REVIEW! Get it? Hehe… thought you would! Thanks a lot! Or you can email me, at Neptune_aqua_princess@hotmail.com!