*Bonheur Trompé- Part 11*
by Kelly
Disclaimer: All characters in this story are the property of NBC, Warner Brothers, John Wells, and whoever else. I just borrow them and promise to return them. Don't worry, I won't hurt them. I make no money off these fics, I write them for fun.
Feedback is always appreciated- DougandCarol@hotmail.com
The music in this story is "Blessed" by Elton John
Writer's Notes: There is an old legend about a ghost called "Resurrection Mary" that haunts the streets and clubs of an area just outside of Chicago. You need to know that to understand a small statement in this story.
Note: The use of indicate the start of a flashback and indicte the end of one.
Big thanks to Carolina and Shannon who give me great idea's and take a look at these fics before they're done, telling me how I'm doing! Thanks guys!!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Hey you, you're a child in my head
You haven't walked yet
Your first words have yet to be said
But I swear you'll be blessed
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The moonlight shone brightly on the dark roads of the highway, glaring on the hoods of the cars that inched slowly along. The heat was on full blast and shooting from the car vents with great force, warming the skin of Luka who sat in the driver's seat, his head resting in his left arm that was set on the armrest of his seat. The traffic was at a practical standstill, and their car was completely surrounded by others. Swarms of red, black, white, blue, even a yellow car sat still near them, all full of drivers and passengers who looked ready to ring each other's necks.
Holding his foot firmly on the brake, Luka reached over and turned the radio off, and adjusted the vents angles so they blew toward Abby, making sure she was warm. He looked at her sleeping face, the way her head was positioned on the headrest. Her face was peaceful and serene, her lips clasped firmly together in a straight line, and her eyes locked shut, her breathing light.
He turned his head to the left and looked into the car next to him. A woman sat in the driver's seat, a cell phone to her ear and a teenage boy sat up next to her. His head was bouncing up and down, obviously moving his head along with the music that was blaring from the headphones he had on his head. Luka smirked as he watched the woman tug the headphones from the boy's head, tossing them into the back seat.
A car honked loudly up ahead, causing Luka to only sigh again. The traffic inched along slowly, stretching for miles ahead of them. He turned again to the car next to them, only to see the boy had again placed his headphones on his head as his mother talked next to him, her arms moving about wildly.
"There she goes." He whispered under his breath, laughing as the woman began barking at the boy, her arms flapping around faster and faster.
There was something about the scene unfolding in front of him that made Luka smile. Sure, the boy was getting in trouble, but the sight of the woman scolding him made him laugh. There was something in the way she moved that reminded him of Abby, and he could only imagine her in only a few years, having to scold their own child.
A little boy, he could imagine him running through the yard, shrieking happily as he played. Jumping through puddles of water left by the rain, or sitting happily in his crib, tugging at the bars, bouncing on his bottom as he waited for attention. That had been a favorite past time of Marko's. He would sit in his crib, staring at the door, waiting for someone to walk in. As soon as they had, his face would light up and he would let out a loud laugh, bouncing happily until he was nestled in their arms.
But then again, he also imagined having a little girl. Dressing her in little dresses or overalls, watching her have tea parties with her stuffed animals. He could almost envision her, the short dark hair like Abby, playfully hiding her face behind her hands, playing hide and seek with him. He could hear Jasna's laughter, and could see her tugging her doll with her everywhere.
Turning again back to Abby as the car sat still, he smiled and adjusted his seat, moving closer toward the steering wheel. Peering down at her stomach, knowing that person would be there in only a few short months made him wonder, and amazed him in only a few short seconds.
You've wanted this for so long, he thought to himself, tapping his hands on the steering wheel as the traffic began to glide along again. He lost sight of the car next to him, as the woman turned the car off an exit ramp. A sign for the town he needed was up ahead, and he pulled the car into a new lane, pushing the turn signal on, as the click from it grew loud in his ear.
"I love you Abby." He whispered as low as he could, watching the bumper of the car in front of him. He knew she hadn't heard him, he hadn't wanted her to. But it gave him a sense of peace in allowing the words to escape; only hoping she still knew he did.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I know you're still just a dream
your eyes might be green
Or the bluest that I've ever seen
Anyway you'll be blessed
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The sounds of snoring came faintly from the hard oak floor of the bedroom as Luka's figure flipped over. His body turned to rest on his stomach, leaving his face buried deep in the pillow he was rested upon, leaving the snoring a soft muffle.
"Baby, this will be so much fun." He whispered evilly, as he tugged her along the dark, chilly street. "A whole night to ourselves."
His hand covered her mouth, his fingers wrapped tightly around her nose and lips, preventing her from breathing. She remained still in his arms, terrified to move or make a sound.
"Don't worry bitch, we're almost there." He sneered, whipping around a corner, keeping his eyes on the surroundings, watching.
Abby let out a small whimper as her hand flung across the bed, her body and mind still fast asleep. "Don't." she whispered dully, as Luka's muffled snores grew louder again. "No."
"Stay still you fucking bitch." He yelled angrily, whacking his hand violently across her face. Her head snapped to the side along the mattress, her loud cries growing louder as she shrieked in pain.
"Stop." Abby whispered, choking on the blood that filled her mouth, sliding down her throat.
"I thought I told you to shut up!" He ordered, angrily climbing back on top of her, pounding on her legs with his fists. "The only thing I want to hear from you are moans of pleasure.' He laughed, sneering at her.
"Stop it." She mumbled, her voice growing full of emotion as she turned in bed, pulling the sheets from over her, tangling them in a ball as she slept. The howling of the wind outside the cabin grew louder as it blew through the leave less trees and open space that surrounded them.
"You say anything to anyone I'll fucking kill you." He whispered, his hands wrapped around her neck as he held her to the bed, his grip growing tighter. "I'll find your house and I'll cut your fingers off one by one. Then I'll slice your toes off. And I'll get your baby, and kill that too. Maybe I'll even kill your husband, you'd like that wouldn't you?" He squeezed her harder, shaking her head forcefully. "Do you hear me!"
She let out a sob, trying desperately to get some air into her lungs, fighting to remain conscious. "Ye.. ye" she got out, as he let his grip go, freeing her and allowing her to breathe. He shoved her head harshly back onto the mattress, jumping from her body. As his feet met the floor, he kicked an empty beer bottle out of the way and reached for his lit cigarette that sat in a broken ashtray nearby.
"Want some?' he asked, laughing from the back of his throat. "You're a smoker, I can tell." He said, taking another drag, dropping back next to her with a lead-like thud. "Oh, don't want one?' he asked, acting as though he were hurt. "Maybe this way will be better."' He thrashed, pushing the lit end onto Abby's upper thigh, holding it there. "Or maybe here." He threatened, pressing it to her neck. "You know you like it."
"No.. stop." She said louder, as her head twisted back and forth on her pillow, her body stuck in one position as she laid on her left side. "Not Luka, leave him alone." She cried, her voice growing louder than the whisper it had been at.
Her eyes watched the large knife that sat on the night table, teetering dangerously close to the edge. The dark black handle that held the large, sharp knife, exactly like the one that sat in her own kitchen, in the back of a drawer.
"I like you ya know, maybe I'll keep you longer." He called through the darkness from the bathroom as the water ran. "I like watching you suffer."
Abby gulped, afraid to move her body as she laid in the bed. She moved her hand slowly up to her head, where she wiped her forehead and pulled back, her hand full of a warm substance she knew was her own blood. She could feel it seeping from her pores, soaking the sheet beneath her. The deep cut he had made in her leg, a warning of possibly slicing her throat, was burning as the cold air hit it. An eerie buzzing filled the room, sending shivers down Abby's spine.
"I know where I could take you." He laughed, as he strolled from the bathroom, pulling his pants on. "I'll take you to that fucking cemetery, maybe that resurrection girl will help you.' He laughed louder, throwing his head back and shaking as he did. "Laugh you bitch, that was fucking funny!" he demanded, his laughing ceasing. He crossed the room, and whacked Abby's nude body, reaching for the knife that sat nearby. "Laugh damn it!"
Abby lay terrified, her eyes watching his every move as he whacked her again, punching her harder and harder as he grew angrier. The way his hand whipped across her skin, his nails slicing her like a razor blade, pulling her it felt in two, her insides falling out.
"Stop it!" she finally cried, loud enough that she herself woke up with a jolt, and Luka shot up from the floor, his blanket stuck to the waistband of his sweatpants. "Stop it!" she screamed again, as her eyes opened wide and she nearly fell out of the bed, her body entangled in the sheets and blankets that kept her warm.
"Abby." Luka said loudly, shaking her arm, rushing over toward her, preventing her from falling from the bed to the cold floor. "Abby, it was a nightmare, you are ok." He soothed her, as she turned to watch him, her eyes wide and full of immense fear.
She sat shaking violently on the bed, as Luka adjusted the blankets around her, detangling them from her legs. Her head was light; the room was spinning before her. She wanted to vomit, her body shook, her head pounded, her stomach began to turn, she needed to vomit.. The gagging started, and her body grew warm, before her stomach expelled everything that sat in it. It came up all over the sheets, her sweatshirt, and covered her face. The remains of it trickled from her lips as she choked, pushing her hands into her eyes.
"He wouldn't stop." She trembled, as Luka returned quickly from the nearby bathroom with a damp washcloth and a large towel. Holding the towel in his hands, he went to clean her with the washcloth and brushed the remains of the vomit from her hands, cleaning her face with it. He nodded and blew through his lips, soothing her as he cleaned the mess, his feet frozen on the cold floor.
"It is ok." He soothed, cleaning the vomit from her hands, pulling the soiled blankets back, gathering them into a large heap and threw them into a ball outside the bedroom door. "He isn't able to hurt you anymore." He comforted her. "I will start the bath, it will help you feel better."
He shuffled quickly to the bathroom, listening to the sounds of Abby as she climbed from the bed, and turned to watch as she stifled back a sob. Pushing through the bathroom door, he leaned over the tub and turned the large knob, waiting as the flood of water began pouring from the faucet. Plugging up the drain, he tested the temperature and allowed the tub to begin filling, pulling a new washcloth and towel from a cabinet, setting them atop the toilet. Stepping back, he watched as Abby entered the bathroom, her body still trembling from the fear of the dream.
"He was telling me he would kill you." She mumbled, wiping her nose loudly as Luka watched, his heart breaking in two. "He was going to cut off my fingers and hurt the baby." She choked.
"Nobody will hurt any of us." He assured her, as she stumbled toward the tub, her arms wrapped protectively around her front, the soiled sweatshirt reeking of the smell of vomit. "I promise." he assured her, aching to reach out and take her in his arms. This nightmare got worse as time progressed. He wanted to pinch himself and wake up, like it all had been a bad dream. Hold her in his arms, kiss her and make everything all better, he ached for the day he could do that again.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
And you, you'll be blessed
You'll have the best
I promise you that
I'll pick a star from the sky
Pull your name from a hat
I promise you that, promise you that, promise you that
You'll be blessed
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
He stood across the dimly lit living room area, holding a warm cup of coffee in his hands. They were wrapped tightly around it, allowing the heat to penetrate through the cup and warm his large hands. The dark wood floor was chilly under his feet that were covered with thick wool socks he had purchased earlier that day. He stood watching Abby who was sprawled out on the couch, her legs covered with a dark blanket.
"Do you want anything Abby?" he asked, walking toward her, setting his body down on the oak coffee table, placing the porcelain cup down next to him.
"I'm ok." She replied, staring ahead into the flickering fire in the stone fireplace. The glimmer of the orange flame reflected in the lenses of her reading glasses that sat on her face. She moved her feet, pulling the left one over the right one.
"Maybe some milk, or do you want some food?" he asked again, tugging at his socks, adjusting the tops around his ankles, pulling the legs of his jeans down.
"No, I'm good." She replied with a small smile, twirling the bracelet latched around her arm. Her smile quickly faded, as her head snapped down, her gaze now at her legs and the blanket that covered them.
"Ok." He said slowly, flashing a small grin back at her, an aching again building in his chest. He wasn't even sure why it was building this time; it seemed to be a normal occurrence now. He began playing with the crease in his pants, pressing his ring finger against it, and running it along it over and over again.
They sat in silence for a minute, an overwhelming awkwardness filling the room. The steady clattering of the water faucets could be heard, sending an eerie chill down Luka's spine.
"Abby, what is the matter?" he asked in a hushed tone, moving himself closer to her, teetering on the end of the coffee table. He heard her all too familiar muffled cries, and saw the wiping of her face. "Abby?"
"Nothing." She mumbled, pressing against her eyes with her thumb. "I just have something in my eye."
"Abby." He said, his voice long and strained. The Abby seemed to last for minutes, just going and going. "What is the matter?" he repeated, trying to get it out of her. He watched her head inch to move, slower and slower.
"What's the matter?" Abby whispered, repeating his words as she turned her head toward him. The glitter of her brown eyes met his, grabbing him like someone's hand yanking on him.
"You can talk to me." He assured her, resting his arms on his legs and allowing all of his weight to fall on them. His fingers were held firmly under his elbows, digging deep into his skin. "Please?" he practically begged.
Abby paused for a moment as his dark eyes continued to watch her intently. He blinked again and again, licking his lips, awaiting her response. His feet moved along the floor, tapping nervously. She continued to play with her hands as she sniffled back another sob, brushing a stray tear away.
"I'm scared to death." She finally whispered, dropping her head again, her hair falling around her face.
"Of what?" he asked carefully, taking a deep breath. "He is dead Abby, you saw him dead. He cannot hurt you ever again."
She sat silently again, gulping the air down into her lungs. "That doesn't mean I'm still not scared." She mumbled, picking at the fuzz on the blanket, yanking it off in large hunks. "But it isn't even that anymore.."
"What is it?" he asked caringly. "You can tell me."
"I'm not worth it Luka." She whispered, almost inaudibly, turning her head away. "It's not fair to you. You shouldn't be wasting your time with me."
That statement sent a shock throughout his entire body, numbing him to the core. It felt like the breath had been knocked out of him, leaving him to only gasp for it. His face felt warm and his feet as cold as ice as his heart fell to his stomach, he could feel it thumping down there.
"Do not ever say that." He said, his tone growing serious as his voice shook. "Abby.. look at me." He said trying to catch his own breath. "Abby."
Her head turned slowly and he caught glimpse of her eyes that were rimmed with dark bags underneath them. Her eyeballs themselves were bloodshot, bright red with tears welding in them.
"Do not ever say that you are not worth it. Abby." He ordered, staring hard at her. "Do you know how much I love you?"
She sat silent, playing with her fingers. "I've done nothing for you Luka." She choked, fumbling with her thumbs. "You deserve someone better, who can give you what you deserve. I won't let you kiss me, or sleep with me.. Luka I want to let you but I'm too scared."
"I know you are scared." He replied quietly. "But Abby, I do not care about the kissing or the sex. When you are ready we can do all of that again. But I want you to feel comfortable. I love you more than I thought I would ever love someone Abby, and having you with me is all I need." He continued, lifting his arm and brushing her shirt brown hair from her face, hitting against the rim of her glasses. "And how can you say that you have given me nothing? Abby, you are having our baby, that is the greatest thing in the entire world." He said as her hand twitched nervously, brushing along the pillow she had yanked onto her legs. "I cannot even tell you how I feel every time I look at you. My heart has been aching since that night, and it aches more every time I see or hear you cry. But God, Abby, whenever I look at you and see your stomach growing more, knowing that our baby is in there, I cannot even start to describe how excited I get. But do not ever say you are not worth it Abby, because you are." He finished, rubbing his hand up her arm slowly, closing his fingers around her hand.
She sat silent, staring at him as he finished speaking, chewing on her bottom lip, drawing blood into her mouth. The warmth of his hand filled hers as she gasped, stretching her ankles under the blanket.
"Why do you stay Luka?" she mumbled, pushing the blanket off of her lap and onto the floor as her body heat rose, causing her skin to clam under the thick sweatshirt she was wearing.
"Because I love you." He replied without thought, squeezing her hand. "Abby, I am not going to leave. It does not matter how long it takes you to heal, I am going to wait."
The fire crackled loudly at that moment, catching the attention of both Abby and Luka who turned toward it, watching as the flames roared and ate away at the large log that sat in the fireplace. The bright orange and red glistened and stung their eyes as it warmed the room with a comforting heat and light smell of burning wood.
"Ow.." Abby gasped lowly, letting her grip go on Luka's hand as she adjusted her position on the coach, pulling her body into an upright position, leaning back against the arm of the couch. Falling back into the pillow behind her, she let out another sigh as Luka watched.
"What?" Luka asked, sounding alarmed as he pulled his arms up from his knees and sat straight.
"Nothing." She replied, pulling her arm out from under her and resting it aside her body on the cushion. "The baby kicked.. hard." She mumbled, turning to meet his gaze as he watched her intently, a small grin appearing on his face.
"Oh." Was all he said, stopping short of continuing. He opened his mouth to continue and closed it again, sucking in the air as he did, holding his head down. He sat there like that for a minute as he took another deep breath, and exhaled loudly. "Abby?" he asked almost like a small child who knew he had done something wrong.
"What?"
"Could I.." he started before he paused, squeezing his fist tightly into a ball. "Could I feel it?" he asked, almost sheepishly, as he allowed his fist to release, opening wide onto his lap and began tapping his finger nervously.
She didn't reply, but only sat there as she pushed on the glasses that sat on her face. He almost regretted asking, afraid he had again upset her. But instead of shaking her head, she began to nod slowly, running her fingers up and down the fabric of the couch.
He sat still for a second, unsure of what to do. Finally, he lifted his hand from his lap and reached the short distance to the couch. Pushing himself to the end of the coffee table, he sat on the edge and reached to her body. He watched as she squirmed uneasily as he moved closer, and slowly set his hand on top of her swollen stomach. Allowing it to rest there, he moved his body closer and waited until he felt it.
"Oh Abby." He sighed, as he exhaled in one big happy sigh as he felt it. His heart jumped when he felt the kick against his hand, causing a rush of adrenaline to run through him, a feeling of absolute excitement building in his stomach.
She watched his expression as he held his hand on her stomach and his reactions as he felt the kicks. How he smiled and laughed as he felt them, how he moved his hand around, following the movements. Watching him, she herself couldn't stop from smiling, reacting to how excited Luka was.
"Luka, I'm sorry." She apologized in a hushed tone, looking to him as she caught his attention, his hand remaining on her stomach.
"Abby, you do not need to be sorry." He replied, taking his free hand and grasping her hand with it. "I know that this has all been horrible and hard."
"I want to try Luka, I want to be close to you again." She confessed. "I want you to hold me, and to be able to feel the baby kick. I want you to be there in the delivery room holding my hand, making sure that everything is ok."
"I will be there." He promised her. "And nothing is going to go wrong Abby, you have done such a great job of taking care of our baby. Everything will be fine."
"You know that…" she started in a low voice before he cut her off.
"Abby, listen to me. I know that the baby could be bipolar, but the chance is even greater our baby will be healthy." He said, as he rubbed her stomach, never wanting to remove his hand. "But we will love it if it is sick or not, do you hear me? If he is sick, we will make sure he is on medication to keep him healthy, and we will make sure that he does stay healthy."
She nodded her head gently as he spoke, watching his facial expression. Her own heart ached as she watched him, and she wanted to reach out and hug him. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and never let go, but she couldn't.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I need you before I'm too old
To have and to hold
To walk with you and watch you grow
And know that you're blessed
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6/26/01
by Kelly
Disclaimer: All characters in this story are the property of NBC, Warner Brothers, John Wells, and whoever else. I just borrow them and promise to return them. Don't worry, I won't hurt them. I make no money off these fics, I write them for fun.
Feedback is always appreciated- DougandCarol@hotmail.com
The music in this story is "Blessed" by Elton John
Writer's Notes: There is an old legend about a ghost called "Resurrection Mary" that haunts the streets and clubs of an area just outside of Chicago. You need to know that to understand a small statement in this story.
Note: The use of indicate the start of a flashback and indicte the end of one.
Big thanks to Carolina and Shannon who give me great idea's and take a look at these fics before they're done, telling me how I'm doing! Thanks guys!!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Hey you, you're a child in my head
You haven't walked yet
Your first words have yet to be said
But I swear you'll be blessed
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The moonlight shone brightly on the dark roads of the highway, glaring on the hoods of the cars that inched slowly along. The heat was on full blast and shooting from the car vents with great force, warming the skin of Luka who sat in the driver's seat, his head resting in his left arm that was set on the armrest of his seat. The traffic was at a practical standstill, and their car was completely surrounded by others. Swarms of red, black, white, blue, even a yellow car sat still near them, all full of drivers and passengers who looked ready to ring each other's necks.
Holding his foot firmly on the brake, Luka reached over and turned the radio off, and adjusted the vents angles so they blew toward Abby, making sure she was warm. He looked at her sleeping face, the way her head was positioned on the headrest. Her face was peaceful and serene, her lips clasped firmly together in a straight line, and her eyes locked shut, her breathing light.
He turned his head to the left and looked into the car next to him. A woman sat in the driver's seat, a cell phone to her ear and a teenage boy sat up next to her. His head was bouncing up and down, obviously moving his head along with the music that was blaring from the headphones he had on his head. Luka smirked as he watched the woman tug the headphones from the boy's head, tossing them into the back seat.
A car honked loudly up ahead, causing Luka to only sigh again. The traffic inched along slowly, stretching for miles ahead of them. He turned again to the car next to them, only to see the boy had again placed his headphones on his head as his mother talked next to him, her arms moving about wildly.
"There she goes." He whispered under his breath, laughing as the woman began barking at the boy, her arms flapping around faster and faster.
There was something about the scene unfolding in front of him that made Luka smile. Sure, the boy was getting in trouble, but the sight of the woman scolding him made him laugh. There was something in the way she moved that reminded him of Abby, and he could only imagine her in only a few years, having to scold their own child.
A little boy, he could imagine him running through the yard, shrieking happily as he played. Jumping through puddles of water left by the rain, or sitting happily in his crib, tugging at the bars, bouncing on his bottom as he waited for attention. That had been a favorite past time of Marko's. He would sit in his crib, staring at the door, waiting for someone to walk in. As soon as they had, his face would light up and he would let out a loud laugh, bouncing happily until he was nestled in their arms.
But then again, he also imagined having a little girl. Dressing her in little dresses or overalls, watching her have tea parties with her stuffed animals. He could almost envision her, the short dark hair like Abby, playfully hiding her face behind her hands, playing hide and seek with him. He could hear Jasna's laughter, and could see her tugging her doll with her everywhere.
Turning again back to Abby as the car sat still, he smiled and adjusted his seat, moving closer toward the steering wheel. Peering down at her stomach, knowing that person would be there in only a few short months made him wonder, and amazed him in only a few short seconds.
You've wanted this for so long, he thought to himself, tapping his hands on the steering wheel as the traffic began to glide along again. He lost sight of the car next to him, as the woman turned the car off an exit ramp. A sign for the town he needed was up ahead, and he pulled the car into a new lane, pushing the turn signal on, as the click from it grew loud in his ear.
"I love you Abby." He whispered as low as he could, watching the bumper of the car in front of him. He knew she hadn't heard him, he hadn't wanted her to. But it gave him a sense of peace in allowing the words to escape; only hoping she still knew he did.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I know you're still just a dream
your eyes might be green
Or the bluest that I've ever seen
Anyway you'll be blessed
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The sounds of snoring came faintly from the hard oak floor of the bedroom as Luka's figure flipped over. His body turned to rest on his stomach, leaving his face buried deep in the pillow he was rested upon, leaving the snoring a soft muffle.
"Baby, this will be so much fun." He whispered evilly, as he tugged her along the dark, chilly street. "A whole night to ourselves."
His hand covered her mouth, his fingers wrapped tightly around her nose and lips, preventing her from breathing. She remained still in his arms, terrified to move or make a sound.
"Don't worry bitch, we're almost there." He sneered, whipping around a corner, keeping his eyes on the surroundings, watching.
Abby let out a small whimper as her hand flung across the bed, her body and mind still fast asleep. "Don't." she whispered dully, as Luka's muffled snores grew louder again. "No."
"Stay still you fucking bitch." He yelled angrily, whacking his hand violently across her face. Her head snapped to the side along the mattress, her loud cries growing louder as she shrieked in pain.
"Stop." Abby whispered, choking on the blood that filled her mouth, sliding down her throat.
"I thought I told you to shut up!" He ordered, angrily climbing back on top of her, pounding on her legs with his fists. "The only thing I want to hear from you are moans of pleasure.' He laughed, sneering at her.
"Stop it." She mumbled, her voice growing full of emotion as she turned in bed, pulling the sheets from over her, tangling them in a ball as she slept. The howling of the wind outside the cabin grew louder as it blew through the leave less trees and open space that surrounded them.
"You say anything to anyone I'll fucking kill you." He whispered, his hands wrapped around her neck as he held her to the bed, his grip growing tighter. "I'll find your house and I'll cut your fingers off one by one. Then I'll slice your toes off. And I'll get your baby, and kill that too. Maybe I'll even kill your husband, you'd like that wouldn't you?" He squeezed her harder, shaking her head forcefully. "Do you hear me!"
She let out a sob, trying desperately to get some air into her lungs, fighting to remain conscious. "Ye.. ye" she got out, as he let his grip go, freeing her and allowing her to breathe. He shoved her head harshly back onto the mattress, jumping from her body. As his feet met the floor, he kicked an empty beer bottle out of the way and reached for his lit cigarette that sat in a broken ashtray nearby.
"Want some?' he asked, laughing from the back of his throat. "You're a smoker, I can tell." He said, taking another drag, dropping back next to her with a lead-like thud. "Oh, don't want one?' he asked, acting as though he were hurt. "Maybe this way will be better."' He thrashed, pushing the lit end onto Abby's upper thigh, holding it there. "Or maybe here." He threatened, pressing it to her neck. "You know you like it."
"No.. stop." She said louder, as her head twisted back and forth on her pillow, her body stuck in one position as she laid on her left side. "Not Luka, leave him alone." She cried, her voice growing louder than the whisper it had been at.
Her eyes watched the large knife that sat on the night table, teetering dangerously close to the edge. The dark black handle that held the large, sharp knife, exactly like the one that sat in her own kitchen, in the back of a drawer.
"I like you ya know, maybe I'll keep you longer." He called through the darkness from the bathroom as the water ran. "I like watching you suffer."
Abby gulped, afraid to move her body as she laid in the bed. She moved her hand slowly up to her head, where she wiped her forehead and pulled back, her hand full of a warm substance she knew was her own blood. She could feel it seeping from her pores, soaking the sheet beneath her. The deep cut he had made in her leg, a warning of possibly slicing her throat, was burning as the cold air hit it. An eerie buzzing filled the room, sending shivers down Abby's spine.
"I know where I could take you." He laughed, as he strolled from the bathroom, pulling his pants on. "I'll take you to that fucking cemetery, maybe that resurrection girl will help you.' He laughed louder, throwing his head back and shaking as he did. "Laugh you bitch, that was fucking funny!" he demanded, his laughing ceasing. He crossed the room, and whacked Abby's nude body, reaching for the knife that sat nearby. "Laugh damn it!"
Abby lay terrified, her eyes watching his every move as he whacked her again, punching her harder and harder as he grew angrier. The way his hand whipped across her skin, his nails slicing her like a razor blade, pulling her it felt in two, her insides falling out.
"Stop it!" she finally cried, loud enough that she herself woke up with a jolt, and Luka shot up from the floor, his blanket stuck to the waistband of his sweatpants. "Stop it!" she screamed again, as her eyes opened wide and she nearly fell out of the bed, her body entangled in the sheets and blankets that kept her warm.
"Abby." Luka said loudly, shaking her arm, rushing over toward her, preventing her from falling from the bed to the cold floor. "Abby, it was a nightmare, you are ok." He soothed her, as she turned to watch him, her eyes wide and full of immense fear.
She sat shaking violently on the bed, as Luka adjusted the blankets around her, detangling them from her legs. Her head was light; the room was spinning before her. She wanted to vomit, her body shook, her head pounded, her stomach began to turn, she needed to vomit.. The gagging started, and her body grew warm, before her stomach expelled everything that sat in it. It came up all over the sheets, her sweatshirt, and covered her face. The remains of it trickled from her lips as she choked, pushing her hands into her eyes.
"He wouldn't stop." She trembled, as Luka returned quickly from the nearby bathroom with a damp washcloth and a large towel. Holding the towel in his hands, he went to clean her with the washcloth and brushed the remains of the vomit from her hands, cleaning her face with it. He nodded and blew through his lips, soothing her as he cleaned the mess, his feet frozen on the cold floor.
"It is ok." He soothed, cleaning the vomit from her hands, pulling the soiled blankets back, gathering them into a large heap and threw them into a ball outside the bedroom door. "He isn't able to hurt you anymore." He comforted her. "I will start the bath, it will help you feel better."
He shuffled quickly to the bathroom, listening to the sounds of Abby as she climbed from the bed, and turned to watch as she stifled back a sob. Pushing through the bathroom door, he leaned over the tub and turned the large knob, waiting as the flood of water began pouring from the faucet. Plugging up the drain, he tested the temperature and allowed the tub to begin filling, pulling a new washcloth and towel from a cabinet, setting them atop the toilet. Stepping back, he watched as Abby entered the bathroom, her body still trembling from the fear of the dream.
"He was telling me he would kill you." She mumbled, wiping her nose loudly as Luka watched, his heart breaking in two. "He was going to cut off my fingers and hurt the baby." She choked.
"Nobody will hurt any of us." He assured her, as she stumbled toward the tub, her arms wrapped protectively around her front, the soiled sweatshirt reeking of the smell of vomit. "I promise." he assured her, aching to reach out and take her in his arms. This nightmare got worse as time progressed. He wanted to pinch himself and wake up, like it all had been a bad dream. Hold her in his arms, kiss her and make everything all better, he ached for the day he could do that again.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
And you, you'll be blessed
You'll have the best
I promise you that
I'll pick a star from the sky
Pull your name from a hat
I promise you that, promise you that, promise you that
You'll be blessed
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He stood across the dimly lit living room area, holding a warm cup of coffee in his hands. They were wrapped tightly around it, allowing the heat to penetrate through the cup and warm his large hands. The dark wood floor was chilly under his feet that were covered with thick wool socks he had purchased earlier that day. He stood watching Abby who was sprawled out on the couch, her legs covered with a dark blanket.
"Do you want anything Abby?" he asked, walking toward her, setting his body down on the oak coffee table, placing the porcelain cup down next to him.
"I'm ok." She replied, staring ahead into the flickering fire in the stone fireplace. The glimmer of the orange flame reflected in the lenses of her reading glasses that sat on her face. She moved her feet, pulling the left one over the right one.
"Maybe some milk, or do you want some food?" he asked again, tugging at his socks, adjusting the tops around his ankles, pulling the legs of his jeans down.
"No, I'm good." She replied with a small smile, twirling the bracelet latched around her arm. Her smile quickly faded, as her head snapped down, her gaze now at her legs and the blanket that covered them.
"Ok." He said slowly, flashing a small grin back at her, an aching again building in his chest. He wasn't even sure why it was building this time; it seemed to be a normal occurrence now. He began playing with the crease in his pants, pressing his ring finger against it, and running it along it over and over again.
They sat in silence for a minute, an overwhelming awkwardness filling the room. The steady clattering of the water faucets could be heard, sending an eerie chill down Luka's spine.
"Abby, what is the matter?" he asked in a hushed tone, moving himself closer to her, teetering on the end of the coffee table. He heard her all too familiar muffled cries, and saw the wiping of her face. "Abby?"
"Nothing." She mumbled, pressing against her eyes with her thumb. "I just have something in my eye."
"Abby." He said, his voice long and strained. The Abby seemed to last for minutes, just going and going. "What is the matter?" he repeated, trying to get it out of her. He watched her head inch to move, slower and slower.
"What's the matter?" Abby whispered, repeating his words as she turned her head toward him. The glitter of her brown eyes met his, grabbing him like someone's hand yanking on him.
"You can talk to me." He assured her, resting his arms on his legs and allowing all of his weight to fall on them. His fingers were held firmly under his elbows, digging deep into his skin. "Please?" he practically begged.
Abby paused for a moment as his dark eyes continued to watch her intently. He blinked again and again, licking his lips, awaiting her response. His feet moved along the floor, tapping nervously. She continued to play with her hands as she sniffled back another sob, brushing a stray tear away.
"I'm scared to death." She finally whispered, dropping her head again, her hair falling around her face.
"Of what?" he asked carefully, taking a deep breath. "He is dead Abby, you saw him dead. He cannot hurt you ever again."
She sat silently again, gulping the air down into her lungs. "That doesn't mean I'm still not scared." She mumbled, picking at the fuzz on the blanket, yanking it off in large hunks. "But it isn't even that anymore.."
"What is it?" he asked caringly. "You can tell me."
"I'm not worth it Luka." She whispered, almost inaudibly, turning her head away. "It's not fair to you. You shouldn't be wasting your time with me."
That statement sent a shock throughout his entire body, numbing him to the core. It felt like the breath had been knocked out of him, leaving him to only gasp for it. His face felt warm and his feet as cold as ice as his heart fell to his stomach, he could feel it thumping down there.
"Do not ever say that." He said, his tone growing serious as his voice shook. "Abby.. look at me." He said trying to catch his own breath. "Abby."
Her head turned slowly and he caught glimpse of her eyes that were rimmed with dark bags underneath them. Her eyeballs themselves were bloodshot, bright red with tears welding in them.
"Do not ever say that you are not worth it. Abby." He ordered, staring hard at her. "Do you know how much I love you?"
She sat silent, playing with her fingers. "I've done nothing for you Luka." She choked, fumbling with her thumbs. "You deserve someone better, who can give you what you deserve. I won't let you kiss me, or sleep with me.. Luka I want to let you but I'm too scared."
"I know you are scared." He replied quietly. "But Abby, I do not care about the kissing or the sex. When you are ready we can do all of that again. But I want you to feel comfortable. I love you more than I thought I would ever love someone Abby, and having you with me is all I need." He continued, lifting his arm and brushing her shirt brown hair from her face, hitting against the rim of her glasses. "And how can you say that you have given me nothing? Abby, you are having our baby, that is the greatest thing in the entire world." He said as her hand twitched nervously, brushing along the pillow she had yanked onto her legs. "I cannot even tell you how I feel every time I look at you. My heart has been aching since that night, and it aches more every time I see or hear you cry. But God, Abby, whenever I look at you and see your stomach growing more, knowing that our baby is in there, I cannot even start to describe how excited I get. But do not ever say you are not worth it Abby, because you are." He finished, rubbing his hand up her arm slowly, closing his fingers around her hand.
She sat silent, staring at him as he finished speaking, chewing on her bottom lip, drawing blood into her mouth. The warmth of his hand filled hers as she gasped, stretching her ankles under the blanket.
"Why do you stay Luka?" she mumbled, pushing the blanket off of her lap and onto the floor as her body heat rose, causing her skin to clam under the thick sweatshirt she was wearing.
"Because I love you." He replied without thought, squeezing her hand. "Abby, I am not going to leave. It does not matter how long it takes you to heal, I am going to wait."
The fire crackled loudly at that moment, catching the attention of both Abby and Luka who turned toward it, watching as the flames roared and ate away at the large log that sat in the fireplace. The bright orange and red glistened and stung their eyes as it warmed the room with a comforting heat and light smell of burning wood.
"Ow.." Abby gasped lowly, letting her grip go on Luka's hand as she adjusted her position on the coach, pulling her body into an upright position, leaning back against the arm of the couch. Falling back into the pillow behind her, she let out another sigh as Luka watched.
"What?" Luka asked, sounding alarmed as he pulled his arms up from his knees and sat straight.
"Nothing." She replied, pulling her arm out from under her and resting it aside her body on the cushion. "The baby kicked.. hard." She mumbled, turning to meet his gaze as he watched her intently, a small grin appearing on his face.
"Oh." Was all he said, stopping short of continuing. He opened his mouth to continue and closed it again, sucking in the air as he did, holding his head down. He sat there like that for a minute as he took another deep breath, and exhaled loudly. "Abby?" he asked almost like a small child who knew he had done something wrong.
"What?"
"Could I.." he started before he paused, squeezing his fist tightly into a ball. "Could I feel it?" he asked, almost sheepishly, as he allowed his fist to release, opening wide onto his lap and began tapping his finger nervously.
She didn't reply, but only sat there as she pushed on the glasses that sat on her face. He almost regretted asking, afraid he had again upset her. But instead of shaking her head, she began to nod slowly, running her fingers up and down the fabric of the couch.
He sat still for a second, unsure of what to do. Finally, he lifted his hand from his lap and reached the short distance to the couch. Pushing himself to the end of the coffee table, he sat on the edge and reached to her body. He watched as she squirmed uneasily as he moved closer, and slowly set his hand on top of her swollen stomach. Allowing it to rest there, he moved his body closer and waited until he felt it.
"Oh Abby." He sighed, as he exhaled in one big happy sigh as he felt it. His heart jumped when he felt the kick against his hand, causing a rush of adrenaline to run through him, a feeling of absolute excitement building in his stomach.
She watched his expression as he held his hand on her stomach and his reactions as he felt the kicks. How he smiled and laughed as he felt them, how he moved his hand around, following the movements. Watching him, she herself couldn't stop from smiling, reacting to how excited Luka was.
"Luka, I'm sorry." She apologized in a hushed tone, looking to him as she caught his attention, his hand remaining on her stomach.
"Abby, you do not need to be sorry." He replied, taking his free hand and grasping her hand with it. "I know that this has all been horrible and hard."
"I want to try Luka, I want to be close to you again." She confessed. "I want you to hold me, and to be able to feel the baby kick. I want you to be there in the delivery room holding my hand, making sure that everything is ok."
"I will be there." He promised her. "And nothing is going to go wrong Abby, you have done such a great job of taking care of our baby. Everything will be fine."
"You know that…" she started in a low voice before he cut her off.
"Abby, listen to me. I know that the baby could be bipolar, but the chance is even greater our baby will be healthy." He said, as he rubbed her stomach, never wanting to remove his hand. "But we will love it if it is sick or not, do you hear me? If he is sick, we will make sure he is on medication to keep him healthy, and we will make sure that he does stay healthy."
She nodded her head gently as he spoke, watching his facial expression. Her own heart ached as she watched him, and she wanted to reach out and hug him. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and never let go, but she couldn't.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I need you before I'm too old
To have and to hold
To walk with you and watch you grow
And know that you're blessed
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6/26/01