Chapter 23

"Oh my, Xellos this place is wonderful!" Filia exclaimed as she set the squirming hatchling down and surveyed her surroundings. They had manifested before a large lake. It was as clear and still as glass, sparkling in the afternoon sun. Wild flowers were in full bloom around the waters edge, the foliage getting more dense as it approached the surrounding forest. The whole area as far as she could see seemed to be surrounded by a mountain ridge, the chill in the wind a telling sign that they were rather high up in the mountain range. "Oh, Val sweetie! Don't go in the water yet! I said no!" Filia put a firmness to her voice as her son made to bound straight for the waters edge. He turned and chirped in question, looking from his mother to the water. She and Xellos made their way closer down the slight hill, picking a spot half in the shade of a nearby tree. Filia called the boy over she began setting up and pulled out the sun ointment, squeezing a generous amount into her hand and began rubbing it over Val's head and back between his baby plumage, paying close attention to his neck and wings. "Are you certain that water is safe Xellos?" Filia enquired as she finished with Val's snout.

"Perfectly. There are no large predator types in this lake, hardly any small types of creatures at all. We're a bit high up for most species of water born animals, and the water can get a bit too warm for most others," Xellos mentioned matter of factly.

"Warm? If we're so high up how would the water be too warm?"

"We're above a dormant volcano that has slept for a few millennium. The heat from the earth below keeps the water slightly above tepid this high up," Xellos said as he lowered to the ground, lying backwards with his arms behind his head.

"Oh, that sounds quite pleasant. Are you going to join us?" She asked as she removed her outer cloak and skirt, revealing her dark one piece swim suite.

"Maybe in a bit. You go on for now. Young Val looks about ready to dive in without you," he said around a yawn as he placed one arm over his face, looking about ready to take a nap in the noon sun.

"He's fine. He picked up swimming rather quickly". Regardless Filia still trotted towards her wayward hatchling and made her way with him towards the water. Xellos was correct in that the water was pleasantly lukewarm as she stepped in and walked out until the water came to her waist, Val gliding through the water around her as she lowered her body and sat in the water, the ripples tickling her chin as she closed her eyes and sighed in contentment. This place made her feel so relaxed, the warmth of the lake easing her muscles and washing away her worries. It was as if her mind was finally free of the clouds that had persisted her life since her defection from the Fire Dragon King. Here, she finally felt at peace.

She lazily opened her eyes and noticed Xellos sitting up and watching her with a calm face, lazily waving a hand in acknowledgement toward her. He looked a bit out of place, with his dark cloak among the bright flowers. The sun shone down the side of his head, adding a shine to his hair and highlighting his jawline and pointed nose. She didn't feel shameful in admitting that physically he was a very attractive man. Thin sturdy build, high cheekbones, glossy hair, and a smile that can turn her stomach into knots, a voice that can send shivers down her spine, hands that can grab so firmly...

Realising the train of thought she shook the images from her head, 'keep it together Filia. This is not the time or the place for those thoughts. Just because you've never been with a male doesn't give you leave to start having such sinful thoughts for the first one to show an interest in you!...Although...' Filia took the time to ponder a thought or two. 'Xellos has made his intentions very clear that he is seeking a permanent relationship with me, if you could call it that. Would it really be sinful to have such thoughts and desires for one who will likely be a life mate? If I agree to this matching then would he not technically be my husband?' The though of Xellos with the title 'Husband' felt weird to her, he didn't really fit the idea she had when she thought of the term. But then again, think of herself as a wife also left an odd feeling in her chest. 'The wife of a demon doesn't really sound like a good thing, for the wife especially'. But she had to acknowledge that he has assured her she will never come to any harm, by his hand at least. But is that enough for her to overlook everything else? She sometimes almost forgets what he is, a Monster. He can be cruel, manipulative, and regularly commits such atrocities that turn her stomach and put the taste of bile in the back of her throat. Would she be able to overlook that and still go to his arms willingly as the years went on? She closed her eyes in a small amount of despair. 'Oh I'm so confused. I know my heart yearns for him. He makes me want to be better, do better. Get stronger and ignite my will to keep fighting to live. But he's also actively trying to return the world to chaos. I can't be expected to stand by and watch him and his kind destroy the world without fighting back. I know it's pointless to try and change his mind. Xellos will never hang up his cloak and embrace the domestic lifestyle with me and raise a family'. Filia could feel her heart clenched as it and her mind raged their war.

"You seem troubled Filia. Penny for your thoughts?" His voice came from above her. She looked up and found him floating above the water in a reclined position staring down at her. She sighed in resignation and let her body relax backwards so that she was floating on her back, Val could be heard paddling not to far from her side. "Just, contemplating our situation." She took a moment to gather her thoughts and calm herself. "We come from very different worlds. Even now you and your kind seek the destruction of this world. Do you realise what position that puts me in? Despite what my heart may say, I can't just stand back and let you do as you will. I'm never going to be ok with that," she stated, there was a sadness to her tone. "What if this fundamental difference is too much for our bond to handle? I fear giving my heart to someone I may end up staring at from across a battlefield". She felt tears sting the corners of her eyes, "this would never be a problem if I chose any other partner, I just, I just don't know".

Xellos considered her words carefully. "Honestly Filia, I don't have any answers either. Just to clarify, I never at one point imagined you being an idle spectator to my work. We are a very unique paring you know. There have been no others who've had to take these matters into consideration. I do have one thing I want to say to you, so please listen carefully," he paused to make sure she was indeed heading his words. "Don't give up hope. I know that sounds strange coming from a monster, but I will mention this. The world is in a constant state of change. To exist is to change with it. Monsters will never stop seeking destruction and chaos, it's in our very nature. It comes as easily as breathing. But there are those who ponder. Questions are being muttered in hushed corners in dark rooms. Questions that before were considered taboo and unknowable". He turned so that he looked down at her horizontally, propping his head on crossed arms. "There is always a chance of a battlefield no matter who you are, but you may be surprised as to whom is on which sides". He smiled down at her, "I hold out the hope that we won't be too far apart on our battlefield. And even then, I've decided that it's worth the risk to have you around now until then. Call it a fools dream from being around humans too much. But if there's one thing I learnt from interacting with Miss Lina, is that it's much better to focus on the now and the things we can control, rather than worry about the things we cannot, and do not know".

Filia smiled gently, wiping a small tear from the corner of her eye. "Maybe. But humans also live much shorter lives than us. It's easy to be so optimistic when they know they probably wont live long enough to encounter the issues we will".

Xellos smiled back. "Maybe. Or maybe they know more than we give them credit for. Having such short lives would be a great motivation to learn as much as they could quickly". He reached down and tapped her nose. "Don't focus yourself on one possible bad outcome, consider all the other more prevalent possibilities of a middle ground. A continuation of the norm you could say. Ponder this. As things are right now, in this instant, do you find this unbearable, or desirable?"

She closed her eyes with a smile. "You make a good point Xellos. I wont abandon the hope of a good outcome. I think I can see something worth fighting for," she looked up at him. "You seem rather optimistic for a monster. If even you can feel hope, then maybe there is a chance for us". They smiled at each other in silence for a moment, simply enjoying the moment.

"So, are you going to come in now? The water's lovely," she said as she gently moved her arms through the water.

"Not right now. Would you both like to come out for lunch now?" Xellos deflected, rising slightly higher away from her. Maybe she was spending too much time with him, or maybe she was just bored, but the urge to have a little fun with him was too much to pass up. "Awww come on Xellos," she tilted her head slightly, "I promise I wont bite, unless you want me to," she smirked up at him. She could see him tensing. "Careful girl. Some would take that as an invitation," he replied in a low voice.

"Oh?" She pulled her legs underneath her, crouching low in the water. "Who said it wasn't?" Without noticing he started to hover closer to her. "Are you saying it was?" He questioned in a sultry voice. Filia gave him her best smile -SPLASH- she exploded from the water, arms outstretched to grab him. In a quick ripple of the air her arms wrapped around nothing and she fell back into the water, sending water flying in all directions as Xellos reappeared higher up in the air, chuckling down at her.

"Hehehe, very sneaky of you Filia. But you'll have to try harder than that," he grinned down at her frazzled form. Her hair sticking to her face and hugging her curves as she stood up from her prone position. "You slippery little.." Filia put her hands in the water and threw them up at him, sending water flying towards him. Xellos flew up higher out of its path, pulling his cloak up behind him. "Uh-oh, you missed...again".

Val noticed the game and paddled over to join the fray. Using his wings to splash Filia with big waves of water. Filia squealed and giggled as she splashed him back. Xellos chuckled as he watched the pair play from his vantage point a safe distance away from stray splashes. Filia noticed Xellos's distance and called out to him. "Oh come on Xellos! What's the big deal? You seem to be trying very hard to avoid the water. Scared you'll melt or something?" Filia questioned playfully. Xellos chuckled from his reclined position above them. "I just prefer to stay dry this time. Do I need any other reason?"

"Well no. But..." Filia slowed her movements and her face started to show some seriousness, "It's just a bit odd. You're missing out on the fun. The whole point of going to a lake is to swim". She couldn't explain why, but Filia started to get a very weird feeling in her gut, like something was off. She stopped and took a hard look around her. Nothing seemed odd about the area. She felt no evil presence (barring present company), although...thinking about it she couldn't sense any other presence. It felt as if they were the only living things around. She heard no birds. She couldn't see anything in the trees. Even the lake was strangely devoid of any fish. She started to swim further toward the center of the lake, the bottom eventually falling away from her feet as she paddled to stay afloat. Whilst the water was clear, it was still deep, eventually the bottom was too far down to see in the darkness.

"Filia? Where are you going off to?" Xellos questioned as he noticed her swimming farther away.

"I'm just looking around. Keep an eye on Val for me please," she replied absently as she swam further out before diving under the water. Xellos looking out to where she had disappeared under the surface before turning his attention to the youngling.

Filia dived downward for a short while before she noticed something in the water. It seemed to be a rock formation of some sort in the lakes center. Swimming closer to it, she noticed it wasn't any random pile of rocks. A large stone pillar was hidden under the water in this lake. 20 feet wide and impossible to tell how tall it was as the rest of its height was in darkness the further down it went. She swam around the large structure until she came upon a large engraving upon the stones surface. Swimming closer she could make out a sharp angular symbol with three points on top and three separated points on the bottom. Her eyes widened in shock as she kicked off from the pillar and swam straight for the surface. Her face had barely broken the surface tension of the water before she was bellowing.

"XELLOS! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!?"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!" There was a scream from across the water. Filia whipped her head around to see a tall figure clad in the white robes of a priestess with the same symbol on her front as what Filia had seen on the pillar. "HELP! INTRUDERS IN THE SACRED WATER! INTRUDERS IN THE HOLY LAKE OF VALWIN!" The figure shrieked for help behind her.

"And that's our cue to leave," Xellos appeared above Filia, holding a squirming Val by the nape of his neck. She reached up and grasped his hand, then they vanished in a ripple of air.

/

They reappeared inside their room, Xellos dumping the pair on the rug and landing to the side, clutching his hands to his chest.

"Xellos you stupid hell spawn! How could you!? Airlord Valwins hallowed ground? Are you trying to get me despised by my entire race?! Of all the places to take a dip, you pick one of the most protected and sacred bodies of water!?" Filia was ready to disembowel the blasphemous bastard, but on her rampaging approached she halted a moment. Xellos was hunching over with his back to her. She slowly approached him to the side and noticed what looked like steam coming from his clutched hand. She looked in horror at the disintegrating appendage. It looked as if he had plunged his hand in acid. The area was smoking and she could see blistering edges of flesh where his hand was literally vanishing.

"Oh no, Xellos. Just wait a moment," Filia darted to the side and grabbed a nearby towel and rushed back to his side as Val rushed over to his pen and hid his head behind his wings. Xellos had knelt to the ground as she sat beside him and grabbed his hands and quickly tried to get all traces of the holy water off him. "Of all the foolishness. Xellos have you lost your mind? You could have been completely purified! Of all the pranks you pull this one was by far the most ill conceived-"

"It wasn't a prank," Xellos interjected her tirade, a grimace on his face. "It was the most effective way I could think of to make sure all traces of that curse was gone". She paused her ministrations for a moment before continuing. She remained silent for a time until his hand stopped disintegrating. With the Holy water gone she could already see his hand beginning to reform. "I'm fine Fi-chan. See it was nothing. It'll take more than some consecrated puddle to do me-"

-SLAP-

Xellos's head whipped to the side from the force of her strike. His head stayed in stunned silence, a shadow over his eyes.

"You idiot. Absolute moron!" Angry tears flowed down her cheeks as she scolded him. "There was several ways you could have gone about doing that. And you never even consulted me. If you had just talked to me about it we wouldn't even be in this situation!" Xellos stayed silent as he turned his head and looked down at his lap. "Did it ever occur to you that I would have agreed with you? That I too would want to make sure I wasn't going to die in my sleep from some stupid curse? Yes. You are right that being baptised in the holy waters of Valwin is a near surefire way to make sure my soul was cleansed of all evil. But how you deceived me was not just arrogant, it was downright wrong and unwarranted". She stood up and walked away from him toward the cowering hatchling, picking him up and holding him close to her, trying to sooth him. She turned to the priest, still in the same position on the floor with his head bowed. "You want me to trust you Xellos, to have faith in you and us. How am I supposed to trust you, if you wont show me the same trust in return?"

Neither of them spoke. A moment later Xellos vanished from her sight. She tried to fight back the tears as she held her son to her in comfort, stroking his long neck tenderly.

/

Xellos reappeared in the forest. His hand had fully regenerated, but he could still feel the sting on it to match the one on his face. His fists clenched as he grit his teeth. His power was rising as he felt a pressure in his chest, his vision bleeding red before he finally released the rage building up in a red blast towards the trees, destroying the forest for miles in a fiery inferno. With a shout he fired off two more blasts for good measure, in the end he stood alone in a barren hellscape of his own making, wishing desperately for something, anything to kill. But nothing came, he was left with nothing but his own thoughts.

"Stupid dragon!" He spat as he lowered to the ground and struck the hot dirt with his fist. "Stupid girl!" -punch- "Stupid" -punch- "Stupid" -punch- "stupid" -punch- "Stupid' -punch- Stupid-stupid-stupid-stupid-stupid-stupid- I'm so Stupid!" -Crack-. The baked ground gave a loud crack as it started to split beneath his blows. He flopped back and sat on the hot earth, a hand coming up to his forehead and shielding his eyes from the world. 'She's right. Ruby Eye damn her but she's right'. He slowly rose from the ground. "She's right," he said forlornly as he slowly walked away.

/

Filia had finally managed to get Val to sleep. The poor baby had been through an ordeal today, their fight must have scared the daylights out of him. She arranged the pillows of his nest a bit to help him feel more secure and dimmed the lights.

She sat on the ground at the foot of the bed and held her head in her hands. 'He's such an idiot,' she bemoaned to herself. It was almost sweet of him to be so concerned for her safety. She's not so ignorant to not recognize he was only doing what he thought was the best solution for her, for once he actually had good intentions for her, so that was reassuring. But his methods...

'If he wants my trust, he has to realise that I need his as well,' she sighed to herself. "If he had just told me from the start I wouldn't have brought an entire picnic set. I would have just stayed long enough for the baptism and left before we were ever noticed". Her thoughts drifted to the distant look on his face before he left. "I hope he's ok".

"He's not".

A sudden voice in the open doorway startled the dragoness, she looked up to find Kerry in her monstrous bird form, her black eyes giving off a shine in the low light. "Miss Kerry. What do you me-"

"Xellos. He's not alright. He's destroying a chunk of the island as we speak," the giant bird stated as she walked slowly into the room. "I'm going to guess this was a pretty serious fight," she asked as she perched in front of the woman.

Filia looked down into her lap. "Yeah, it was. He expects me to just go along with his schemes, but wont even have enough faith in me to let me in a little. I'm doing my best to open myself up to him, but he's as shut off as ever". She looked up almost helplessly at the bluebird. "I know I love him. I know he's a monster, I've accepted that. But..but," she clench her hand to her aching heart, "I just, I just want us to find the middle ground, but I feel like I'm the only one looking for it," she felt tears sting her eyes again, but none fell, she thinks she's starting to run out of them.

"Hmmmm," The monstress pondered to herself for a moment before speaking. "You know, even though you two are in a unique situation, your problems right now aren't that uncommon, even among mated monsters". Filia rubbed her stinging eyes and looked up at her. "How do you mean?"

"I mean issues of trust among mates is very common. Monsters aren't necessarily very open and trusting of others, you can understand why I'm sure. The same still holds true to most bonded pairs. Some of them learn to trust each other after a few hundred years. Others never really bridge that gap, but I've seen them work around it. Although..." She paused in thought for a moment. "I wouldn't be so quick to assume Xellos doesn't trust you to some extent".

"I'm sorry Miss Kerry, but I've not really seen any indication-"

"Because you're looking in the wrong place," the monster cut her off. "Has he not stated outright his intentions toward you? Has he not shown how much your well being means to him? I'm pretty sure at this point he even plainly said he cares for you. For a monster do you have any idea how vulnerable such admissions make us?" Kerry sounded like she was starting to get frustrated with the woman. "He had just openly admitted what one of his weaknesses is. I've seen great monsters taken down on less". She took a deep breath as if to calm herself before locking Filia's blue orbs within her inky black ones. "Xellos is never one to share any of his plans and back ups with anyone. You only see what he allows to be seen. The fact that you can see any more than that is an outright miracle from L-sama herself".

Filia sat in stunned silence as she processed this new viewpoint. Kerry offered one more piece of advice. "You both have many years to find your middle ground, you are not the only one looking. Don't give up just because you're both doing it in the dark".

Filia smiled as she looked up at her. "Thank you, for your words of encouragement Miss Kerry".

"Don't mention it. Ever. I will deny this conversation ever happened," she said as she walked around and gently climbed upon the bed with the sleeping dragon, perching next to his nest. "Go to him. I'll watch the hatchling," she said.

"Um, I'm not sure," Filia hesitated.

"It's fine, the youngling knows me by now and Xellos needs you. I promise I'll keep watch until you sort this out. Now go. He's already destroyed the entire eastern side and is making his way north".

Filia steeled her nerves and nodded. As she turned to leave Kerry stopped her, "Be careful Goldie, the north side can be very dangerous, I wouldn't go unarmed," she said motioning to where her mace sat leaning against the vanity. Filia nodded in acknowledgement and grabbed it as she ran out the room.