A/N: I would like any criticisms, constructive or not, to be placed. I would like to improve my reactions if possible.
Again, I do not own Rooster Teeth, the dialogue, or Red vs Blue. The script can be found in the RvB wiki.

Agent "David" Washington

"Ugh. What do you think this is about, North?" South Dakota asked, her helmet held to the side, revealing her blonde hair.

"I have no clue, kiddo. I'm not the man you should ask. We should be getting debriefed soon, so calm down." North Dakota replied calmly, his helmet hanging to the side, showing his blonde hair and green eyes like his sister.

Despite their similar looks, these two were nothing alike. South Dakota was brash, aggressive, and rude, almost to the point of being cruel. North was the opposite, being kind, compassionate, and loyal to his friends. Washington had a pretty good relationship with the latter, the former giving him shit every time they met.

They all walked in silence for a few moments, taking in the stale, recycled air of the ship. Then, finally, Washington interrupted it, "Hey, South, still pissed that you couldn't attend the Heist?"

She clearly was, but he couldn't help but ask to pass the time. She, of course, replied in the most bitchy possible. "Of course, I fucking am, Wash! I was sidelined at the last possible second because of the other mission I was assigned to because of my supposed "insubordinate" behavior! Fuck the Director!" South snapped back angrily.

"Woah, woah, woah. Easy there, South. We can't talk like that here, especially on his property." North said, wanting her to stop before she said something she would regret later.

"Alright, stop talking. We will all be there shortly." North said, wanting everyone to be prepared for their meeting with the Director. They all started walking to the elevator, pushed the button, went inside, and waited. They did not have to wait long.

After they got out, they were greeted by the sight of Agents Carolina, Texas, Connie, Florida, Wyoming, York, and Maine.

"Greetings, Agents; it is great to see you here." The Director said, "I was expecting you." Well, if that wasn't cause for concern, the next words that came out of his mouth were.

"I'd like you all to meet someone, a person I haven't let anyone see." The Director stated ominously. "Come out, Alpha." Wait… who the fuck was Alp-

A blue hologram appeared on the nearest terminal, looking like one of those outdated GUARDIAN AI models used a while back. Oddly, he had a sniper rifle in his hands as well. There was silence for a moment before breaking it with a scratchy voice, "What's up bitches! I haven't met any of you in person, but I have read your files." He could almost hear the sheer smugness in the A.I's voice.

Ah, I see. Washington thought He is one of those types, isn't he? Not surprising, to say the least.

"Okay, now that we are all here, shall we start? I'm curious about where this will take us." The Director asked, not necessarily a question, and more of an order, "Alright, let the show start. F.I.L.S.S, darken the lights, and keep a close eye on our surroundings," The Director said.

[AFFIRMATIVE, DIRECTOR.] F.I.L.S.S said.

(Pan up from the ground and close in on two soldiers on top of a base, one clad in maroon armor, Simmons, the other in orange, Grif.)

Simmons: Hey.

Grif: Yeah?

Simmons: You ever wonder why we're here?

Grif: It's one of life's great mysteries isn't it? Why are we here? I mean, are we the product of some cosmic coincidence, or is there really a God watching everything? You know, with a plan for us and stuff. I don't know, man, but it keeps me up at night.

"..."

"Wow, that was surprisingly deep for the start of an episode," North Dakota said.

"Really? I think they're bored, considering where they are." South Dakota argued.

(Both stare at each other in silence.)

Simmons: ...What?! I mean why are we out here, in this canyon?

Grif: Oh. Uh... yeah.

Simmons: What was all that stuff about God?

Grif: Uh...hm? Nothing.

Simmons: You wanna talk about it?

Grif: No.

Simmons: You sure?

Grif: Yeah.

"Awkward..." Washington said, rubbing his neck while doing so.

Simmons: Seriously though, why are we out here? As far as I can tell, it's just a box canyon in the middle of nowhere. No way in or out.

Why would they bother putting Simulation Troopers here? C.T asked in her mind, and It does not make much sense, logistically speaking.

Grif: Mm hmm.

Simmons: The only reason that we set up a Red Base here, is because they have a Blue Base over there. And the only reason they have a Blue Base over there, is because we have a Red Base here.

I understand the need for these bases and the troops, but something does not seem... right with how this whole thing was set up... It's almost like they were trying to protect something... C.T thought suspiciously.

Grif: Yeah. That's because we're fighting each other.

Simmons: No, no. But I mean, even if we were to pull out today, and if they would come take our base, they would have two bases in the middle of a box canyon. Whoopdee-fucking-doo.

Grif: What's up with that anyway? I mean, I signed on to fight some aliens. Next thing I know, Master Chief blows up the whole Covenant armada and I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere, fighting a bunch of blue guys.

I'm confused, The Director thought, Is this in the future?

(Zoom in on two soldiers watching Grif and Simmons from atop a cliff, one wielding a sniper rifle and in cobalt armor, Church, the other standing behind him in aqua armor, Tucker.)

Why does this person seem familiar? Alpha thought absentmindedly, and why does he look so alike to me?

Tucker: What're they doing?

(Church slowly turns around to face Tucker, lowering his rifle.)

Church: (aggravated) What?

Tucker: I said, "What are they doing now?"

Church: (frustrated) God damn, I'm getting so sick of answering that question!

Oooh, someone is angry, South thought sardonically, drawing parallels between her and York.

Tucker: (defensively) You have the fucking rifle, I can't see shit. Don't bitch at me because I'm not going to just sit up here and play with my dick.

Church: (interrupting) Okay, okay, look... they're just standing there and talking, okay? (getting angry) That's all they're doing. That's all they ever do, is just stand there and talk. That's what they were doing last week, that's what they were doing when you asked me five minutes ago. So, five minutes from now, when you ask me, "What are they doing?" my answer's gonna be, "They're still just talking, and they're still just standing there!"

(Both fall silent.)

Tucker: ... What're they talking about?

Church: ...You know what? I fucking hate you.

"I can relate," Wyoming said tiredly, "The number of times I've been asked to do the same is just tiring at this point."

(Cut back to Grif and Simmons.)

Grif: Talk about a waste of resources. I mean, we should be out there finding new and intelligent forms of life... you know, fight them.

Simmons: Yeah, no shit. That's why they should put us in charge.

(Cut to a low angle shot of a soldier in red armor, Sarge, who is seen looking up at Simmons and Grif.)

Sarge: Ladies, front and center on the double!

Simmons: Fuck.

Grif: Yes, sir!

(Fade to black.)

"That was short," Alpha said, "Want me to begin the next one, Director?"

"Go ahead, Alpha. Play the next video." The Director ordered.