Prepare thyself for insanity! When…
Dib's Cuz Comes to Town!!!
Chapter 1: Not Just Another Skool Day
Yeah I know, I don't own Invader Zim. HOWEVER! I do own MYSELF! I think…
Zim stood on the playground, carefully trying to avoid the dodgeballs, footballs, and whatever else flew towards his head.
But in the words of Yoda, the great Jedi Muppet: "Do or do not. There is no try."
So far, Zim was doing not.
"Foolish earth stink-beasts and their playthings!" he growled angrily as he recovered from yet another beaning to the head. Finally, the bell rang to go back into Skool. Isn't school spelled differently? Zim wondered again as he walked in. (a/n: Come on, he has had to think that at least once!)
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"We have a new student," said Mrs. Bitters, indifferent to the idea she presented. "Her name is Kat. Don't kill her, seeing as it's her first day." Mrs. Bitters swooped down the aisles and passed out some papers. "Pop quiz. You had better pass, or suffer the consequences." She hissed at the class, then swooped back to her desk.
Zim looked at the first question. It read:
To what country do the Tuamotus belong?
Zim frowned. This question was absurd. He looked at Kat, who had sat down next to him. She had short blond hair with her bangs brushed off to the side, large glasses that seemed to take up half the space of her face, and a smile that was barely more than a straight line. She tapped her pencil on the desk as she worked on the pop quiz.
Why does this human look so familiar? Zim wondered. He casually looked over at Dib, who was working on his quiz diligently.
"Eyes on your own paper!" shrieked Mrs. Bitters. Zim jumped and got to work.
As he finished the last question, it hit him.
That girl looked like Dib.
Zim handed his paper in and walked back to his desk. Kat snickered and gave him a note. Zim raised one eyebrow. He opened the note. It said:
Kat- Stay away from Zim(the green guy)! He's an alien! -Dib
Zim- Is that true, or is Dib just being his usual paranoid self? –Kat
Zim sighed. He replied:
Of course Dib is being paranoid! I am not an alien and I in no way wish to take over the world, human fools!
Kat read this, nodding. She wrote some more.
Zim, most of the people here would fall for that. However, I seem to be the only one that noticed "skool" is not spelled that way.
Zim gasped. This human knew who he was! She was also quite intelligent, from what she expressed.
Zim looked back at Kat. At the moment, she was trying to balance a pencil on her nose. Once she'd gotten it to stay, she hung a rubber band from each end. Finally, she hung a paper clip from each rubber band. She grinned triumphantly.
Zim stared. She sure didn't seem smart.
The bell rang. The class stood up and began to leave.
Outside; Gaz, Dib, and Kat stood by the door. Zim walked out.
Dib noticed him. "Hello, Zim," he said. "It would seem I'm now not the only one who knows your secret. Kat and I will destroy you! You can't take over the world if you're taken down and dissected!"
Zim noticed that the whole time Dib had been talking, Kat had been giving him bunny ears. However, he didn't know what bunny ears were. "What bizarre ritual is Kat performing with your ugly head?" he inquired, pointing.
Dib's smile disappeared. "What?" He turned around. Kat pulled her hand down quickly. "It's quite simple, Zim. It's called 'giving your stupid cousin bunny ears'." She giggled insanely, sounding a lot like Gir.
"Kat! I've told you not to do that!" Dib yelled.
"Shut up, Dib," Gaz said. "I'm almost to the last level. I don't need you breaking my concentration. And by the way, I'm leaving now." She began walking down the stairs of Skool.
Dib turned to Zim one last time. "Prepare to be defeated and exposed!" He started to walk after Gaz. "Come on, Kat!"
"Be there in a sec!" Kat called.
Zim stared at her some more. "Are you really Dib's cousin?"
"Yeah. Hey Zim, wanna be friends?"
Zim laughed derisively. "What makes you think that I'd want to be friends with a human? The cousin of my sworn enemy, at that!" Well, my sworn enemy besides bees, he added mentally.
Kat shrugged. "I dunno. I just thought you might want to."
"Not if you're going to expose me."
"You kidding? I always wanted to meet an alien. I would never give him away to scientists."
Zim narrowed his eyes. "I don't trust you."
Kat shrugged. "'Kay." She skipped after Dib and Gaz.
Zim headed towards his own home. He could feel that tomorrow would be a good day.
Or so he thought.
*imitates Gir as she runs around the room* Wheeeeeeeeeeeee! I'm running! *slams into the computer chair and falls down, then gets up and giggles wildly* So whaddaya think? I tried to bring out the character traits the best I could, but I think I could have done better on Zim. Oh, and that pop quiz question is from an episode of "Boy Meets World" where Cory had to be in this geography bee. In the next chapter, you will meet Gir! Prepare for even more insanity!
-Katreon ^@~@
Review, or I'll team up with Gir to write a story. (The horror…the hypernessnessness…)
