"I caught sight of my reflection,
I caught it in the window.
I saw the darkness in my heart.
I saw the signs of my undoing,
They had been there from the start.
And the darkness still has work to do." - Peter Gabriel, Blood of Eden
His eyes snapped open, and he panted a few times. He grabbed a nearby clock and looked at the time. It was 3 in the morning, the hour of the wolf. He sank back against his pillow in relief. Only another nightmare. He had been suffering from them almost nightly now. Ever since the attack with the cursed Dagger of Malechior a couple of months back. Apparently he had not entirely beaten the curse, only putting it into remission. He didn't want to go back to sleep though. His dreams now seemed to remind him of his own inner dark side more and more. The potential he had for evil and destruction. The worst though was that this inner demon took perverse delight in his witnessing Willow being tormented by his own hand. That frightened him more than anything else. If any harm were to come to his Willow, no matter what the cause, he would never forgive himself, and he wouldn't be able to live. She had always been a part of his life, ever since they were little toddlers. She was his anchor to sanity. If she wasn't there, he wouldn't be able to face the darkness that stalked their town every night. Not even with the Slayer's presence.
A loud ringing noise pierced his ears then. He winced a bit, his mind fuzzy from sleep, before realizing it was the phone.
He picked up the receiver, "Hello?"
"Xander? You okay?" Willow's worried voice replied.
"Uh, yeah, Will. Just tired. It's 3am after all. You know, when all good Slayerettes are supposed to be in bed?" he dryly joked.
"You had another nightmare didn't you?" she asked in her gravely serious voice. Ever since the attack, the two had felt a strong, almost telepathic bond with each other. If one was in danger, the other knew instantly. It had helped on occasion with their many run-ins with the latest evil that the Hellmouth had attracted.
"Will, it's nothing. Really. Just residue junk from that curse."
"You don't know that. Have you told Giles yet?"
"Uh, no. He's got bigger thing to worry about. Remember, the big bad Mayor? Ascension? Sunnydale going boom? You know, end of the world as we know it? Besides our graduation day?"
"I know, Xander. But this is important, too! What if you're relapsing? If you don't tell Giles soon, I will!" Willow said in her resolve voice.
"Ok, ok, I'll tell him tomorrow, today, whatever. Just let me get back to sleep, all right?" He wearily agreed.
"Ok, sweet dreams, Xander. Love you."
*Sweet dreams, I wish!* "Love you, too Will. Night."
"Night." Click.
He let the receiver fall back into the cradle, more like crashed with a protesting ding. He flopped back down, and stared at the ceiling for five minutes. He then got up, and went to the window. The nightmares had left him with severe insomnia. He had been falling asleep more often than usual, even for him, during the day, particularly during classes. However, when he fell asleep at night, his slumber was so troubled that he would now be awake, and looking outside. When his mother was out, he'd usually just head over to Willow's. He had found he was able to get some sleep with her in close proximity. When they were kids, she would reassure him that there was no bogeyman in the closet. Not till high school, did they learn otherwise. That the things that go bump in the night were indeed real. Nights like this, Xander was tempted to go down, and sneak into the liquor cabinet. Just one soothing drink to help him fall asleep. However, this latest mental scare-fest had warned him of such action. He went down that path, he would become his father, and he just couldn't let that happen. For dear Willow's sake.
I caught it in the window.
I saw the darkness in my heart.
I saw the signs of my undoing,
They had been there from the start.
And the darkness still has work to do." - Peter Gabriel, Blood of Eden
His eyes snapped open, and he panted a few times. He grabbed a nearby clock and looked at the time. It was 3 in the morning, the hour of the wolf. He sank back against his pillow in relief. Only another nightmare. He had been suffering from them almost nightly now. Ever since the attack with the cursed Dagger of Malechior a couple of months back. Apparently he had not entirely beaten the curse, only putting it into remission. He didn't want to go back to sleep though. His dreams now seemed to remind him of his own inner dark side more and more. The potential he had for evil and destruction. The worst though was that this inner demon took perverse delight in his witnessing Willow being tormented by his own hand. That frightened him more than anything else. If any harm were to come to his Willow, no matter what the cause, he would never forgive himself, and he wouldn't be able to live. She had always been a part of his life, ever since they were little toddlers. She was his anchor to sanity. If she wasn't there, he wouldn't be able to face the darkness that stalked their town every night. Not even with the Slayer's presence.
A loud ringing noise pierced his ears then. He winced a bit, his mind fuzzy from sleep, before realizing it was the phone.
He picked up the receiver, "Hello?"
"Xander? You okay?" Willow's worried voice replied.
"Uh, yeah, Will. Just tired. It's 3am after all. You know, when all good Slayerettes are supposed to be in bed?" he dryly joked.
"You had another nightmare didn't you?" she asked in her gravely serious voice. Ever since the attack, the two had felt a strong, almost telepathic bond with each other. If one was in danger, the other knew instantly. It had helped on occasion with their many run-ins with the latest evil that the Hellmouth had attracted.
"Will, it's nothing. Really. Just residue junk from that curse."
"You don't know that. Have you told Giles yet?"
"Uh, no. He's got bigger thing to worry about. Remember, the big bad Mayor? Ascension? Sunnydale going boom? You know, end of the world as we know it? Besides our graduation day?"
"I know, Xander. But this is important, too! What if you're relapsing? If you don't tell Giles soon, I will!" Willow said in her resolve voice.
"Ok, ok, I'll tell him tomorrow, today, whatever. Just let me get back to sleep, all right?" He wearily agreed.
"Ok, sweet dreams, Xander. Love you."
*Sweet dreams, I wish!* "Love you, too Will. Night."
"Night." Click.
He let the receiver fall back into the cradle, more like crashed with a protesting ding. He flopped back down, and stared at the ceiling for five minutes. He then got up, and went to the window. The nightmares had left him with severe insomnia. He had been falling asleep more often than usual, even for him, during the day, particularly during classes. However, when he fell asleep at night, his slumber was so troubled that he would now be awake, and looking outside. When his mother was out, he'd usually just head over to Willow's. He had found he was able to get some sleep with her in close proximity. When they were kids, she would reassure him that there was no bogeyman in the closet. Not till high school, did they learn otherwise. That the things that go bump in the night were indeed real. Nights like this, Xander was tempted to go down, and sneak into the liquor cabinet. Just one soothing drink to help him fall asleep. However, this latest mental scare-fest had warned him of such action. He went down that path, he would become his father, and he just couldn't let that happen. For dear Willow's sake.
