DISCLAIMER: I don't own Digimon or the Five For Fighting song "Superman." Please don't sue!



NOTE: We're assuming here that this is a few years after the second season of Digimon. Yamato's a teen rockstar, and for some reason, not liking it. This is a song fic/re-write of a song, combined. Yes, some of the lyrics suck major arse, but I had to fit them to Yamato's mood. Try singing them to the actual song. They work, really! Anywho, I'll shut up now and let you read.



I can't stand to fly

I'm not that naive

I'm just out to find

The better part of me...



Ishida Yamato plucked at his guitar and sang slowly, a sad tinge in his normally cheerful singing voice. No one else occupied the band's practice room. Yamato wanted it that way. That's why he was sitting here at midnight, the doors bolted, only a single light on. He sang a bit more, improvising his own words to fit the situation.



I feel like a bird,

'Been trapped in a cage,

I'm more than that pretty face

You see on stage

And it's not easy to be me...



He felt like his life was falling apart. He knew if he spoke, the media would call him a whining brat star, and his fans would sink him deeper into this pit, this hole he was digging. He didn't see the source of his depression. He loved being on stage, he loved the crowds, the fans, the traveling, the attention. He loved being loved by millions, but he couldn't love any of them back. He knew they wanted him only for his fame. He couldn't express himself to them.



I wish that I could cry,

Fall upon my knees,

Find a way to lie,

'Bout the love I'll never see...



He was writing a song now; a love song, but he didn't want to sing it. He didn't know those feelings. Even in his multitudes of girlfriends, he never found that satisfying love he was seeking. His lyrics were empty. His heart wasn't in them.



It may sound absurd,

But don't be naive,

Even heros have the right to bleed.

I may be disturbed,

But can't you all see,

Even heros have a need to dream

And it's not easy to be me...



He almost wished he was back in the Digital World with his only true friends. He dreamed about that place. He dreamed of the fighting, the wars, the endless adrenaline rush, his fist fights with their leader... How could he forget those times? How many times had he fallen into one of their arms to cry? No, that was wrong... he had been far to cool to cry for any of them, save for his brother, and Taichi.

Why had he only cried for Taichi? Why did the tears flow that much easier for his rival? No doubt Yamato was the lone wolf of the team, and he clashed with the leader easily and frequently. It might have been this close, physical, passionately angry outbursts that let him express his other feelings to the young man.



Got to escape

Go way up high from me

But it's all right.

You can all dream soundly tonight.

I won't leave you....



They had cooled off later, years later, when the second attack on the Digital World came. They were older. Somehow, though, they weren't as close. They'd grown further apart as the years rolled on, but somehow it hurt more deeply than the loss of a friend. Yamato felt like he'd lost part of his soul.



I can't stand to fly

I'm not that naive

Men weren't ment to ride

With clouds between their knees



Where was Taichi now? Where was he when Yamato needed him most? The angry, depressed young man dropped his guitar to the floor and reached slowly for the bottle of sleep medication he had been prescribed, sensing the weight of the pills through the thin plastic. Enough of those would let him sleep for eternity.



I'm only a man

On a brightly lit stage,

Singing for my fangirls

And a massive wage

I'm only a man

What you want me to be

Looking for a special one

A love for me, just for me, just for me.



Slowly he raised the handful of pills to his mouth, the glass of water to aid his swallowing of death resting nearby. He had slipped one pill between his lips when his cell phone rang noisily. Irritated, Yamato went to step on it, but the Caller I.D. that appeared flashing on the screen stopped him dead.

I'm only a man

A guy on stage

I'm only a man

Tryin' to escape this cage

And it's not easy

It's not easy to be me



Taichi was on the other end. Yamato practically dove for the phone, the pills scattered and forgotten on the hard wood floor.

"Hello?" Yamato asked in a shaking, tear-filled voice.

"Yamato? This is Taichi. Is something wrong? I just got a feeling I should call you. You sound awful."

"Taichi.... please come see me... please..."

"Yamato? What's wrong?"

"I just nearly took my entire bottle of sleeping tablets, Tai."

"...I'll be right there."

Yamato sagged down on the floor after unlocking the door, and shook terrified and crying, waiting for that one he could love, and praying to God the other would love him back.