S T A N - (Yamato's Crazy Fan)

1
Dear Matt, I wrote you but you still ain't callin'.
I left my sell, my pager and my home phone in the bottom.
I sent you three letters back in the first season,
You must not-a got'em for some strange reason.
Maybe that b*tch in the post office missed them, I'll warn her...
But anyways, f*ck it, what's been up? Man how's Sora?
I know you probably hear it everyday, but I'm your biggest fan and it ain't no lies,
I even got the underground sh*t you did with Tai.
I got room full of your posters and pictures man,
Even got the one where you're ridin' Garurumon, that sh*t was fab.
Anywayz I hope you get this man, hit me back.
Just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Stan.

Chorus:
I missed an episode, so why I got out of bed at all?
Why do I need those freakin' series if I can't see them all?
I would just sit down and cry, but your picture on my wall
It reminds me that it's not so badm, it's not so bad...

2
Yo Matt, season two is up but you STILL ain'c callin'.
I check my pager, e-mail and answering machine every mornin'.
I'm not mad at you, I fully understand -
You've gotta be busy playin' with your band.
I just think it's f*cked up you don't answer fans.
I even came to Tokio to meet you, that was my only chance.
I spent the day hangin' around Odaiba school,
But you didn't came out, man, that's ain't cool!
All I wanted is an autograph for my lil' brother Matthew.
See, my mom's a digimaniac too, she named'em after you.
That's pretty s*itty man you're like his f*ckin' idol!
He dyes his hair blond, dresses in green,wants to be like you more than I do!
I didn't have normal family either,
My dad used to cheat on my mom and beat her.
I can relate to what you're sayin' in your songs,
When I have a s*itty day I draft away and put them on.
Sometimes I try to walk the edge of knife although it f*ckin' bleeds...
But everything you say is real to me.
I run a website called " Yama-kun Heaven",
And my girlfriend gets jealous 'cause I talk 'bout you 24/7.
You gotta call me man, I'm the biggest fan you ever gonna lose!
Sincerely yours, Stan. PS - We should be together too.

Chorus

3
Dear "Mr.-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-My-Fans"!
This will be the last package I ever send your @$$!
"Digimon - The Movie" came out and still no word - I don't deserve it?
You dissapointed me Matt I thought you were perfect.
When you get this tape I hope you'll sour
'Cause I'm ridin' Garurumon on the the bridge, makin' 90 miles per hour.
See, Matt... (SCREAM!!!!!!!) Shut up, I'm tryin to talk ya piece o'crap!
Hey Matt, that's my friend tied to his back.
He reminds so much of that motherf*ckin' Tai,
He plays soccer, wears googles, thinks he's a smart@$$ and now he'll die!
You see, I'm not like you, I'll go to the end...
Oh sh*t... I forgot... If I die now, how this tape will be send?...

(Scream "DIGIMON FOREVER!!!!" - breif silence - SPLASH)

Chorus

4
Dear Stan, I meant t write you earlier but I've just been busy.
You see, savin' the world is ain't no easy.
Ha ha, now serious, this is the script writer who came out with character of Yamato.
You're so "into" this stuff man, you're simply loco vato!
If Matt was real he would be proud to have such a loyal fan.
When I read your letters I really get thrilled, Stan.
Well here's his autograph for your little brother...
But the s*it you wrote about been together wouldn't make Matt want you and him to meet each other.
Besides, what is up with you walkin' the edge of knife?
That's just a song, dogg, Matt wouldn't do it in real life!
Wake up Stan, hurting yourself won't get you anywhere.
Maybe you heard about a guy who was totally "out there",
He broke into the zoo, stole a wolf - I wonder how did he manage not to become his snack. -
And jumped off the bridge with his friend tied to the wolf's back.
And in his pocket they found a tape but they didn't say who it was to.
Come to think about it, his name was... that was you!
Damn...