CHAPTER 6
Shouldn't had let him go
What am I doing here? I don't
know...Wildwing, what happens?
I am frightened.
I want that you come to help
me, like you always did when I was little.
But instead you laugh at me,
make fun of me...are satisfied to know that I am here, that I am suffering
because of you!
Some parts of me are telling
me that I should stop relying on you, that I am old enough to stand on
my own feet...that you won't be there forever.
I always relied on you, bro.
Trusted you. Trusted you with my life.
You go to hell? I follow. Like
you would follow me.
Would have followed.
Seems that our bond has disappeared,
and I didn't notice it. Maybe I could have prevent it...maybe – when I
had shown more respect...
But it's too late now.
But Wildwing, how can you forget
that easily? All the wonderful memories back on Puckworld...How easy can
you forget your love for your brother?
You did love, I always knew.
But...not now.
What's this all? Where's the
sense of it?
It can't be reality...but it
can't be a dream either, it's too real.
Maybe it's something I didn't
want to think of...yet...
Maybe it's...death???
I would laugh if I could. Laughing
makes your life easier, ya know. That's my attitude. See always the positive.
And make jokes about the negative things. It worked – it may not be the
best of all attitudes, but it worked.
Until now.
What am I supposed to do? Why
are you forcing me, brother?
Are you forcing me?
I have no idea.
My life has never been easy. But
I managed it, somehow. When I was little, the other ducks laughed about
me because I was so clumsy. I fell about every stone, every chair...everything.
And it hurt.
I managed it because you helped
me. Because you've been there, telling me to stand up, to try again. And
I did.
I always try again – try it until
it works. Give never up.
If you give up on something, that's....like
being a looser. It doesn't mind how good or bad you are at something. Just
don't give up.
Keep your hope.
Sentences which are marked in
my brain. Sentences you told me once.
But now you are there, telling
me things you would never tell...I think.
I don't know what to think! Why
shall I stay here? My attitude hasn't changed, so has yours? You became
stronger when Canard disappeared. You became a leader, and I must say,
you are a good one. Better than Canard.
But does being stronger have something
to do with rejecting me?
Why can things never been clear
enough to see through?
.....
And why is this room grey?!!
* * *
~Tanya~
"He's WHAT?", Wildwing yelled unbelieving.
I could see the concern and pain in his eyes – and I knew that I wore the
same expression on my face. Now everything seemed to be okay, and then...
I sighed. "He's comatose, Wildwing.
That means that I can't wake him up, and that he probably even can't wake
up himself..."
"No...", our leader said softly
and stared at the younger duck, who was lying on a stretcher in the infirmary.
Pale. Unmoving. So untypical for Nosedive!
I didn't want to tell him this! Hell,
this was so unfair! Why the kid? Why this?
And why couldn't I do something?
I was supposed to be the genie – you search a solution? Ask Tanya, the
walking book....But this time, the time I was needed the most, I failed.
Failed miserably. Couldn't help the poor kid who was suffering...couldn't
do anything!
I gulped. This was going to be difficult.
"Ehm...that's not all...", I whispered, voice shaking.
Wildwing closed his eyes in an attempt
to keep the tears. "What else?", he asked, not looking in my eyes.
"Well...maybe you know something
about comas and so..it's like that...he might...uhm....kinda", I clutched
my teeth, "He might die ,Wildwing."
That was it. I said it. The danger
wasn't over, it was still there...
"Why?", Wildwing questioned simply.
"Why in a coma?"
"I don't know Wildwing. I'm sorry,
I wish I could tell you, I wish I could do something, but...", my voice
was trailing off, as I watched the face of our leader.
A bunch of expression was written
above his still young face – pain, worry, concern, guilt....It was hitting
him really hard.
We all have lost family members.
But my bonding between my family had never been that strong like his.
They were never showing it, of course.
A reason which made our life pretty
interesting.
My brain failed as I tried to imagine
a life without Nosedive. No pranks? No jokes?
No old tacos in my lab? No comics
on the floor? Unpossible! We couldn't loose a team-member, we had already
lost Canard, and now Nosedive?
The youngest!
Your life begins with 17! And his
might be over....
"He will make it!", Wildwing interrupted
my thoughts. "He's strong. Has always been. He can do that!"
He was more trying to convince himself
than me – but I understood. He, as a leader, had to take every hope...had
to be strong for the sake of the team...for the sake of his brother.
Poor Wildwing.
Poor Nosedive.
"Even if he pulls through, there
might be the danger of after-effects.", I warned him, feeling guilty to
destroy his hopes, but knowing that it would be the best.
"Many people who suffered
through a coma lost their personality....they were totally apathetic, not
speaking, not reacting. As if they were in coma again!
They had to learn speaking , had
to learn to touch people...but the younger the person is, the more harder
it is for him to regain is personality."
"So, in short, ", Wildwing glared
at me, "Even when he wakes up, there's a high danger that we have a walking
ghost instead of a noisy and weird teenager??"
I nodded.
Wildwing put his head in his arms
and sighed. "I knew that I shouldn't have let him go..."
* * *
" LEMME OUT! I WANNA GO HOME", Nosedive
yelled and banged his fists against the closed window(which was, of course,
grey).
"YEAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGH!!!!",
he stormed through the room and searched for something...useful! It was
so unfair. In comics, the glorious heroes found always things they needed
to escape...they had a bubble-gum and a pencil and WHOOP! the door was
open and the wild battle against the bad guys began.
Heroes weren't supposed to be treated
like little kids!
Gloomily, the young duck stared at
the wall. He would write a letter to these comic authors...they shouldn't
be allowed to write such illogical stuff...
Now he regretted that he didn't
read something more...useful! Like 'How to escape from a prison' or so.
But he doubted if such books existed – maybe in the library of Duke L'Orange,
but definitely not in the normal book store.
Hey – what was he thinking about?
He would probably never come out again – yet write a letter to someone
of the 'outside world'!
Tiredly he leaned his head against
the cool glass of the windwo(grey).
"I.Wanna.Go.Home.", he muttered
under his breath, when suddenly his attention was caught by a movement
– outside the window.
He blinked. There was something outside?
He didn't see it before...or?
The scene became clearer, and soon
Nosedive could recognise a familiar place – very familiar.
Puckworld.
This was his home – Puckworld! Boy,
for how long...
It was a small park near his house...he
remembered it exactly....Wildwing and he, they had always went there
for playing ice-hockey. It was just the best place.
Now someone entered the area he could
see from the window. Nosedive froze.
It was him! A younger version of
the Nosedive everybody knew, but still him...
One part of his brain was telling
him that something had to be very wrong with him...first a grey room, then
an insane brother and now this! But the other part was telling him to watch,
trying to convince him of the importance to pay attention....
Now the little duck skated on the
ice, still a little bit unsure, but full of enthusiasm.
He managed two steps until he fell
the first time. Then the second. And the third...
Nosedive smiled. The kid didn't,
and he liked that.
There was nothing worse than giving
up!
He wished that he could open the
window, that he could join the childish play and the peaceful scene.
But destiny had different plans.
To be continued...
Now I wrote everyone's POV....have
to think how I'll continue it...hmmm....ah well, but first I have to practise
a little bit - concert will be soon!
Kaeera