Just One Reason

Just One Reason

By Sayoku

I have no reason to live.

I'm waste. So I'll throw myself away.

Isn't that what you do with waste?

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/Just one simple shot. I've done it often enough already. Too many times to be able to count it.

Only this time, there's going to be one major difference: I'm going to be the dead man.

What will the others think, when they find me, all dead...

This is the first time I've thought about the others. Taking them into consideration...

What is happening to me? They shouldn't worry me. But they do. Everything does, and I can't stand it. It doesn't give me peace.

My life hasn't EVER given me peace. Just for once I'd wish to be alone. Not to worry about anything at all. To be able to go through the streets and think about the people passing by, and not about who I'll have to kill next. But this'll never happen. It's only a nice dream.

Is this finally it? Will The God of Death come to fetch me?

Shinigami.

Duo. No matter how often I had rejected him, he always came back, just to be sent away once more. What will he think? Will he be sad? Will he... laugh? The perfect soldier dead. Committed suicide... What irony./

He searched for the correct place to point the gun. Of course he knew several places to kill a human straight away, but he was wondering about the pain. Not that he wouldn't be able to cope with it; he couldn't decide if to suffer a bit before dying.

For Heero Yuy it would be correct to die through one well placed shot which would kill him straight away. A perfect shot, for the perfect soldier.

He decided to suffer.

/How could I find peace when dying through the person I'm running from, who is myself, and who is the reason for my suicide? Why shan't I die by my own self, which has been suppressed just too long already?/

"Heero!" Duo searched for his so called friend.

"Heero! Nimru!" He stopped in front of Heero's door.

"Did you forget the mission, man?!" He opened it, and looked in.

"Heero?" His eyes widened in shock. "What are you doing there?!"

Heero turned around and looked at him.

"Just one reason, Duo. Just one reason..."

"Anou, Heero... what do you mean? You don't surely..."

"To live."

"...anou...Hee..."

"No? None? Then go out. I don't expect you want to see this. Pretend you didn't see this."

Duo was startled. Heero smiled. He just wanted to do one thing: pull the trigger. This situation was just to strenuous. /My ticket out./

"My ticket out."

"Heero! That's not going to lead you anywhere! I'm Shinigami, I should know!"

"Then give me one reason, Duo."

"Give me the gun Heero."

"A reason Duo."

"I...I can't. You think I have never tried? I'll tell you. There's no reason for ANYTHING!"

"Then why didn't you...?"

"I decided to see what' going to happen next week."

Heero lifted the gun to his head. This had to go quickly. Otherwise this could be a failure. Duo could bring him to hospital, and then the mission would be a failure.... there he was again. The perfect soldier. /No. I don't want this. He won't stay away.../

"The soldier... he won't stay away... I wasn't meant to survive the war anyway...

"The soldier isn't. But you are!"

Heero let the gun drop. Now he had the reason he had wanted.

"Hai..." the gun fell to the ground. Hard. A bullet got it's way out, and Heero cramped and fell.

"Heero!"

Duo ran to his friend and took him into a tight embrace. A little stream of blood trickled down his chin.

"...am. I...free now, Duo..?"

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C&C welcome and appreciated.