Disclaimer: Refer to Chapter 1
Consolation
Irvine, Selphie and Zell sat at a table in the cafeteria; they had already eaten their breakfast. "Squall was very absent when he went," Irvine said a little miserably. He was going to be gone for a month, away from his friends and he hadn't even said good bye properly, as if he didn't care. "Rinoa didn't come down with him either..." he said thoughtfully.
"Maybe they had an argument..." Zell said. Nineteen-year-old Zell looked much different from seventeen year old Zell. He had matured a lot after the battle with Ultimecia; it showed in his face, his voice and the way he spoke. Zell was still as energetic and impulsive as ever though.
"Do you think I better go and find Rinoa...something is wrong, don't you think?" Irvine said, addressing his friends.
"Let's wait a bit first, Rinoa might come down in her own time," Selphie said, sipping some cold coffee. Irvine looked unsure, he was worried about their friend, but complied with Selphie, let Rinoa come in her own time, she may simply have been a little too upset to see Squall off. They waited, but Rinoa didn't come, not for two hours.
"I'm going to find Rinoa.... she can't be hiding in her room just because she's missing Squall, something else happened," Irvine said after the two hours of waiting. Selphie and Zell nodded and went with him to Squall and Rinoa's own personal room.
Irvine tapped at the door lightly with the back of his hand, no answer. He knocked again, but still, no answer. "Rinoa… are you in there?" he asked. From within he heard a sob. She was there. Irvine opened the door a bit; the whole room was in darkness. "Rinoa??" he said softly, she was curled up in a ball upon the bed, silently crying.
"Go away, please... leave me.." came a reply, barley audible, "please...leave me.." she whispered. Irvine closed the door, knowing not to go in, she wanted to be alone. Irvine went back to worried faces around the corner of the corridor. Selphie and Zell looked confused; they had expected him to be longer.
"She's.... very upset..."Irvine said, his only conclusion, "I didn't go in, she wanted to be alone."
Selphie didn't look too convinced but decided to leave it at that, if Rinoa wanted to be alone, best leave it at that. Zell looked back towards Rinoa's room, something was wrong. Something was defiantly wrong. "Let's go and meet Laguna, maybe he'd be able to see Rinoa," Zell said wisely. Irvine and Selphie agreed, thinking that this also would be a good idea. Rinoa loved Laguna like she would do to a father and the kind president of Esthar loved Rinoa, like she was his daughter. If anyone could get through to her and cheer her up, it would be him. Laguna had that talent with everyone.
Squall sat miserably in the back of the van, while the other SeeDs chatted, not bothering to disturb him or try to involve him in their topic of chat. Squall didn't care, he didn't want to talk, he didn't want anybodies company, only his own. Why? I thought she felt the same.......I was wrong then....wrong about Rinoa....what a fool I must be to think she of all people, would love me...would want to be with me! Squall thought to himself, slumping in his seat, rocking gently to the movement of the van.
Quistis sat opposite Squall, she looked slightly worried, her friend was looking more pre-occupied then he usually did with his thoughts, his frown that lay upon his face at the moment had caused a huge crease on his brow. Yet she didn't say anything, whatever was going on in Squall's head was nothing do with her. Instead she occupied herself with talking to Xu, head of Squall's upcoming mission. She had already planned what it was that they were going to do, every step they were going to take.
"What's up with Squall?" she asked quietly to the young blonde, quiet enough so that Squall couldn't hear. Quistis shrugged. "I don't know, he's been like it all day," Quistis replied, glancing at Squall, who was still looking at his feet. "Something's upsetting him, I think," Quistis replied. Actually, she didn't just think, she knew. Squall had more then a lot on his mind, he was upset, but over what, Quistis didn't know.. Xu stared lightly at Squall; he was quiet, even quieter then usual. The two friends returned to their previous discussion.
Squall fell back into deep thought. If she really loved me, she wouldn't of needed to think about it… would she? But I love her...shit, it hurts. Rinoa....do you love me? Why won't you marry me? Be my wife? I thought that's what you wanted; to settle down with me Squall slumped further, burring his chin further into the palm of his hand. It does sound very final...settling down... marriage ...husband and wife. Maybe she does love me...but she just isn't ready to make that much of a commitment yet...but... if she really loved me, I thought she did, it wouldn't matter...
Squall wanted to cry, but he couldn't, not with all these people around him. Not in front of all these people whom he knew looked up to him.
There was no one who could be with him, despite Quistis being there, he had no friends and was almost completely alone. Even Quistis though seemed to prefer to keep the company of Xu after she had regained her instructor's license last year. This thought made Squall's journey a whole lot harder knowing he was going to be alone, no friends, nothing. Why couldn't any of his other friends come along....but they weren't needed according to Headmaster Cid. He hadn't wanted to send more SeeDs out then needed.
The only reason why Dollet needed SeeD was because one of the Dollet gangs (Dollet had split into two groups both fighting for different things) had gained help from the Galbadians, who by doing this had broken the peace treaty and taking over the west side of Dollet, leaving the other gang of Dollet fighters to live and fight from the east. As soon as the west Dollet gang had joined up with the Galbadians, who no doubt had their own reasons, the east Dollet forces had called upon SeeD to help them. Now, yet again, Garden's SeeDs were at war against the Galbadians. This made Squall angry. Hadn't he gone through enough with them?
Squall hated them; he began to hate SeeD as well. If he wasn't SeeD...he would be living in a house somewhere with Rinoa...hopefully married. Squall regretted thinking that....if it hadn't been for SeeD, he would never have met Rinoa, never to of fallen so deeply in love, never to of known such happiness. He would probably have become some hermit and lived in a forest somewhere in a tree house, chopping up wood. Squall laughed slightly to him as he thought of himself chopping wood up with an axe, the moment of self-brought humor brought Squall out the growing depressive mood he had been falling into.
Squall looked up and smiled at Quistis who had looked at him to see how he was. She relaxed to see that her friend had come out of his mood, to become happier, though he still looked a little sad. "Are you Okay, Squall?" she asked.
"Yeah," he replied, he really appreciated Quistis big sisterly care sometimes. Now was one of those times.
Irvine Zell and Selphie waited for Laguna, Kiros and Ward to arrive, which they soon did, driving up in one of Esthar's high technology cars. The three friends greeted the president of Esthar and his two close friends, who received their welcome with beautiful kindness.
"Laguna!" Selphie grinned and planted a kiss on the father of Squall. Irvine and Zell shook the hand of the famous president and progressed on to welcoming Kiros and Ward, like old friends. Laguna beamed, he loved these teenagers, it was a pity Squall and Quistis weren't here to greet him too. Thinking of the two missing friends... one of them which was his son, he noticed another one was missing, one that should be there. The beautiful Rinoa, Squall;s girlfriend.
"Where's Rinoa, she isn't ill is she?" he asked, looking slightly worried.
"Rinoa...yeah. Something's wrong with her..... she was crying the last time I saw her...she's in her bedroom Laguna, something's upset her badly, I think it may be Squall," Irvine told him, who had showed almost as much parental concern for them as Quistis sometimes did. Laguna's handsome cheery face fell. If Rinoa was upset, then so was he.
"I want to see her," he said, it came out sounding more like a demand. He demanded to see her. He had to see her. She was his son's girlfriend and he already loved her like a daughter. Irvine took Laguna to where Rinoa was, leaving Selphie and Zell with Kiros and Ward.
"Look, Laguna, it's something more then Squall leaving for Dollet, it has to be," Irvine said to Laguna, "please....cheer her up, if Rinoa stays so upset for too long, she'll get sick." Laguna nodded and patted Irvine on his shoulder. The young sharpshooter stalked off to find Selphie, Zell and Laguna's two friends.
The president of Esthar knocked on the wooden door; there was a dim sound of sobbing coming from inside. He knocked again and opened the door, not waiting for a reply. Rinoa was sitting on her bed, her head buried in her knees, sniffing and sobbing a little. Laguna felt a wave of sadness and fatherly love come over him. He hated to see this young woman so upset, it hurt him so much. Irvine was right, if Rinoa stayed so upset like this and for too long, she would indeed become very sick.
"Rinoa......" he said softly. Rinoa looked up, not recognizing the voice to be anyone of her close friends, Irvine or Zell. She was pleasantly surprised therefore to find that it was Laguna.
"Laguna!" she said, wiping her eyes dry, crawling out of bed and wrapping her arms around the older man's neck. For a while they hugged, Laguna loved this young woman, he held her for quite a while before she released him. "What.... oh… of course.. I forgot.... you were coming today!" she said happily and kissed his cheek, inviting him to sit down on the bed. Laguna did so, letting the room remain dark.
"Yes, it was a pity I could not come earlier," he sighed. Rinoa saddened.
"Yeah, you didn't get to say good bye to Squall..." she said. And neither did I because of my stupid stupidity!
"No. No, I didn't. I'm not crying about it though. Rinoa.... what is it?" Laguna asked. Rinoa sagged upon Laguna, it would be better if she told him, she knew that.
Rinoa told Laguna; she told him everything, how Squall had asked her and how she had practically said no, hurting Squall's feelings, something which he had dared himself to ask her, something he had wanted to ask her, something which had taken an awful lot of courage. Rinoa had turned him down... breaking his heart, making him doubt himself again, too worried about what people might think of him. He had allowed himself to become close to her, very close after two years, only to have something that he thought she had wanted...which I do! But he doesn't know that...does he? Only to have it thrown back in his face. Rinoa returned to crying again, How many tears do I have.. I've been crying almost non stop for three hours.
Laguna hugged Rinoa to himself. The poor, poor child and poor, poor Squall. To be out there and not knowing that Rinoa did want to marry him.
