Scars
Chapter Two: Snowfall
I don't own this.
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The autumn day was glorious as Sakura walked down the street, her eyes dull, her footsteps slow. Scarlet leaves rained down around her, standing out against the crisp blue sky, and a brisk wind played tag with the clouds. A bright sun shone down on the world, warming it ever so slightly in preparation for the long winter ahead. All in all, it was gorgeous.
And she saw none of it.
All she saw was the ground, now. The gray, flat sidewalk. Is this what I'm becoming? she wondered sadly. Gray, and flat and dull?
If only she could run away from Tomoedarun away and never come back
But Ueno would only come after her. She didn't know how he would find her.
But she knew he would if she left.
And maybe she wouldn't live through it.
Her back ached slightly. After he'd pushed her into the lockers twice, it had been hurt so badly she'd been forced into wearing a brace for a month and a half, and even now, two months later, it still occasionally bothered her.
Ueno had backed off a little since then. He hadn't hit her while she still had the brace, and for the next week afterbut then the next time she had done something he hadn't liked, she'd ended up with an ugly bruise spreading over her arm.
He'd gotten smarter. Instead of hitting her in the face, like he had once or twice, he was only striking her where she'd have to cover it. The long sleeves of the fall High School uniform hid the bruises mottling her arms all too well.
He didn't have to worry about her showing off her injuries, though. She knew all too well what could happen if she told anyone and he found out.
"Hey."
She looked up to meet a pair of friendly brown eyes. "H-hi," she stammered, her nerves jumping. Oh my god, what if he sees me talking to Syaoran?
"You look like you were thinking about something pretty serious," he said casually.
"Yeah," she replied, keeping her eyes on the ground. How she hated keeping him distant like this; all she wanted was to pour it all out to anyone who would listen, anyone who would understand.
All she wanted was real love.
But that wasn't going to happen with Ueno; she didn't want it from him.
They walked in silence for a few minutes. It was so odd that all the things she wanted to tell him were things she could never say; how odd it was that she couldn't because of Ueno.
Ueno had destroyed her life.
What would happen if she told Syaoran? Would he believe her? What if he didn't?
What if he did? What would he do?
She wanted to tell him. She wanted to be in his arms like she'd been when she'd been rejected by Yukito. She wanted just to be with him.
But as long as Ueno had his claws in her, that would never happen.
They reached her house, and she said, "See you tomorrow."
"Yeah." He walked away as she went up the steps and into the house.
What is going on? Syaoran wondered hopelessly. I think I'm going to go crazy! Three months–three months, and she still won't talk to me–and I still don't know who it is!
Life was not fair.
She seemed okay. Still quiet, and still holding back, but okay.
She just wasn't talking to anybody.
Thwack!
There was a dull thud as he punched the bag again. Tomoyo doesn't have any idea who it is, eitherso how the hell am I going to find out? I can't just stand around and wait for whoever it was to get caught!
And Ueno
The guy was a creep. He didn't know what Sakura saw in him, whether it was something he couldn't see or something that no one saw other than her.
Or maybe it was something that didn't exist.
Butsomething had changed her. Something had changed in her.
She had always talked to him. Sometimes, she'd said things that he hadn't wanted to hear, but he wanted to be there for her, so he'd listened anyway.
He couldn't quite put his finger on it–what it was that had changed. She hasn't lost all of herher Sakura-ness, he thought. But it's like she'sshe's lost hope. Or most of it.
Bent, but not broken.
That notion made him stop the rain of blows he'd been throwing at the punching bag. It was the only thing that really helped; that and pretending it was Ueno
But bent? By what?
What IS it?
He ran a hand through wild, sweat-damp hair and went to stand at the window. Frustration was never good for him, but this was going beyond normal
Syaoran knelt in the hall after school once more. It was early winter now; the leaves had vanished and the trees were stark black-brown skeletons against gray skies. Ever since the time he'd found the dent in his locker a few months ago, he'd learned to know when they had been there. Or more accurately, whenever the mysterious girl was attacked.
Today, the fear, bitter and angry, was so thick he could almost taste it. Fear; mingled with frustration, sadness, dread, and anger.
No one was in the hall. He frowned, reaching out with magic and feeling for anyone near enough to stumble across him in the middle of the spell. He was safe; almost everyone was gone.
There was a soft flash of light as the scene started to play out once more, the figures too hazy for him to make out, the voices distorted and wavering.
"Where were you at lunch?"
"I was eating with–with friends," the girl said weakly. "I didn't see you."
"We always eat lunch together." Even with the time warp, the soft, dangerous tone was clearly conveyed. "Always."
"I'm sorry–"
"Don't lie!" He shoved her down. "You were avoiding me, weren't you?"
"No–" She tried to shield herself with her arms, but he viciously backhanded her and she fell back. There was a soft but audible crack as her forehead came down on the cold floor.
"Don't hide from me," he said lowly. "You can't hide from me. I'm watching you."
"I–I'm not–trying to hide–from you!" she panted, a thin trickle of blood falling down her face.
"DON'T LIE TO ME, BITCH!" He picked her up by the shoulders and slammed her into the lockers. She let out a small gasp of surprise and pain, but didn't make any other noise, taking the punishment silently.
He let her go, and she slid to the floor weakly as he strode away.
Sickened, Syaoran straightened and stood. This was getting worse by the minute
Sakura stood in front of her mirror, gingerly feeling the wide bruise across her face. If the magic doesn't work, I'll have to lie about it tomorrow
Damn you, Ueno.
White magic flickered around her fingers, and the mottled purple mark that marred her cheek slowly faded. She sat down hard on the bed, exhausted. Of all the magics she knew, healing herself was the hardest, and face wounds were the worst. I can't heal the cutbut my bangs will hide it anyway
With a sigh, she leaned back, feeling her new bruises all too well. What if I tried to break up with him?
He'd kill me. I really think he'd kill me.
Her chin trembled, and a tear fell down her face, followed by another.
There was a knock on the door. "Dinner, kaijuu."
She sniffed quietly and swiftly rubbed a hand over her face. "Coming." Taking a deep breath, she tried to calm her nerves. If anyone found out, he'd kill her.
It was a dangerous game she was playing–dangerous and deadly. One wrong step, and she lost.
So until there was a way out, she'd have to watch where she walked.
But when?
When will there be a way out?
Maybe
Maybe never.
Her eyes lost the watery shine; but the lump in the back of her throat didn't go away.
"I'm leaving in a week."
Sakura stared at Ueno, not sure if she'd understood him correctly. "What?"
He appeared to mistake her surprise for tribulation. "I'm going on vacation for two weeks," he said patiently. His mouth was twisted in a gentle smile, his overall manner gentlemanly and kind. He looked calm, sympathetic, and caring.
Two weeks? Two weeks without him?
"You'll be gone–for two weeks?" she asked incredulously.
"It won't be that bad," he said. His eyes looked somewhat warm, but she could see through the mock heat and to their true, icy cores. "I'm leaving in a week."
"Oh." She sat back, trying to let her thoughts settle. Two whole weeks. It was the first break she'd had from him since–since–She couldn't remember the last time he'd left her alone for more than a day.
Two weeks, free of fear and pain. It was almost too much.
"I gotta go ask the coach something." He stood up.
She nodded numbly as he strode away, then got up, clearing away the remains of her lunch.
What if–what if I told Syaoran?
He would get mad, part of her said. He's my friend, so if I get hurt, he gets mad, and if Ueno hears we've been hanging out together, both of us could be in trouble.
Ueno's got a perfect record, too. If I tell anyone, he can just point out that I've been falling a lot lately, and the bruises could've come from anywhere. He could say we broke up, and I was trying to get revenge on him.
But two weeks
I won't think about it, she decided. I've got two weeks free of Ueno, and I'm going to try to repair all the damage he made me make.
Starting with friendships
"Tomoyo?"
The violet-haired girl looked up, startled. "Sakura?"
Her friend smiled briefly. "Long time, nospeak."
"Yeah." She blinked. "What kept you?"
"I've been really busy," she lied. "You know, with track, and then the math sessions with Mrs. Shigetaka."
"Oh." Tomoyo took a closer look at her friend and disliked what she saw. Deep circles under the eyes; pain reflected ever-so-slightly in the double pools of green; a face pale, though from what she could not tell. Exhaustion? Worry? Stress?
Or all of the above?
"How's Calculus going?" she asked, trying to keep her mind away from that.
"Okay." Sakura sighed. Just because math had always been her least favorite subject didn't mean she wasn't any good at it. "I'm having a tough time with all the theorems, though. It drives me crazy. What about art for you? How many have you sold now?"
Tomoyo smiled. "I think around five or six, nothing big." Suddenly, she grinned widely. "You know, I haven't made you an outfit in years, Sakura."
"I was hoping you'd forgotten that," she moaned.
"Forget my best friend's conquests of the forces of good and evil?" Tomoyo pretended to be shocked. "Nothing would ever make me forsake that!"
"What about Eriol?"
"Well, um, uhhe doesn't count!"
"I'm offended. You'd give up your best friend for a sociopath reincarnation of a magician who lives in England. And he probably votes Tory, too."
"He does not!"
"Did he tell you?" At Tomoyo's blush, Sakura grinned.
This is almost like old times
Ueno was gone by Thursday; he'd left his mark on Sakura, ensuring she wouldn't forget him.
Her eyes filled with tears of pain as she examined the quickly-swelling gash across the top of her forehead. It would probably bruise, but If I use too much healing magic, Syaoran will notice
She'd have to leave it alone, other than cleaning it. My bangs will cover it, she decided, letting them fall over her eyes once more. It could have been worse.
And on the plus side, I've got two whole weeks of no Ueno.
If only it were longer
Syaoran stared at the mirror, studying what he saw–or at least, what he saw in his mind: Sakura.
She talked to me, he thought confusedly. She didn't look like she was–was scared or anything. Why?
Was she going back to normal again?
If so, why? What was making her change back?
Ueno's gone for the next two weeks, a voice reminded him in the back of his head. Could that be it?
Oh, yeah, girls just love it when they have to spend fourteen days away from their boyfriends.
But what if it was because he was gone?
Then something had to be up.
You're being paranoid. Honestly, you'd think anyone was evil if they were going out with Sakura instead of you.
But still
He scowled. It had happened again, too, and between two things he couldn't do anything about, he was going crazy.
"Don't forget," the boy snarled. The girl sat up, a stream of blood streaking down the side of her face as he stalked away. She held a hand under her bangs, and when it was taken away, he could see the scarlet stains.
That was all he had seen–but it was enough to make him infuriated once more.
I hate being helpless
Sakura leaned back against the wall of the school. Was she actually happy? Was it actually possible?
Of course it is, her mind said bitterly. Ueno's gone, remember?
She shook her head, trying to get rid of any thoughts about him. What was much more important was the fact that she was actually starting to live normally again. Okay, so maybe it'd only be for two weeks, but still
I think I'd better check that cut. She slipped into the girl's bathroom and made sure no one was inside, then lifted her bangs. The skin around the angry gash was mottled red, looking almost infected. Taking a paper towel, she held it under the cool stream of water, then dabbed at the wound, gritting her teeth at the pain. It's not healing up like it should be
She threw the damp brown wad into the trash can with a disgusted sigh, walking out the door.
The icy breeze cut through her blazer like a knife, chilling her to the bone. Shaking, she made her way home. She and Tomoyo were going to the movies that night; the next day was an inservice day, so they didn't have to worry about getting a good night's sleep.
Something cold and light skipped across her face, and to her surprise, instead of flinching, she laughed at the tickle. Glancing up, she watched in surprise as first a few grainy flakes of snow drifted down, then more. Soon, they were swirling around her like a flock of miniature swans, lacy and delicate.
Her laugh rang through the quiet, and she was surprised at the sound. When was the last time I laughed?
I've forgotten
Smiling–smiling!–she ran down the sidewalk, pulling off her coat and throwing it over her head to shield her from the snow flurries. Her soft footsteps were the only sound heard in the newly-white world.
It's like everything's been reborn
A sudden thought made her stop in her tracks. It's been almost a year. Almost a year since–since he asked me out.
Then, something else occurred to her, as she gazed out at the fresh snow, still sweeping down over Tomoeda.
If the world can be reborn like thismaybe I can too. Maybe this is–maybe it's a second chance.
I have two weeks without Ueno. I'll think of something.
Anything.
But a small spark of hope was kindled within her. The hope shone through her soul and came out in a new glitter, returned to her eyes.
And, laughing, she ran home.
"Sakura, instead of walking home, why don't you spend the night at my house?" Tomoyo's voice was only slightly distorted in the phone lines. "It's too cold for you to be out there by yourself. And maybe I'll invite Syaoran over, and leave you two alone. How does that sound?"
Sakura prayed to any listening deity that her brother was not listening on the extra line. "TOMOYO!"
"I'm just kidding." Tomoyo sighed regretfully. "Although it would be so kawaii if you two ever hooked up"
"Tomoyo, I've got a boyfriend," she reminded her, trying to keep any bitterness from her voice.
"Wellyou can just dump him and go out with Syaoran! He's crazy about you, you know."
She blushed a bright red. "Tomoyo, that isn't funny! I thought only Yamazaki was the one who lies!"
"I'm not kidding. But anyway, why don't you spend the night over here instead of walking home?"
"Is that okay?"
"Of course it is!"
"Hey, why don't we go sledding tomorrow?" Kero pushed her away from the mouthpiece and seized the phone. "I've never tried it in my true form!"
There was silence as both girls pictured that for a minute; then laughter from both sides of the line.
"What?" he asked defensively.
"Nothing. Give me that." Sakura snatched the phone back. "Sounds great, Tomoyo. Should I take my stuff with me or will we stop by my house on the way back?"
"We'll stop by your house–no–wait–I CAN MAKE YOU A SLEDDING OUTFIT!"
"Tomoyoooo!"
"And it'll be frilly and really, really, really pink, and–AND IT'LL HAVE PUFFY SLEEVES!"
"Tomoyo, I am perfectly able to bring my own winter clothes, thank you very much."
"And I can video tape it all"
Sakura merely shook her head. Some things never changed.
In the end, she was able to convince Tomoyo that no, she did not need a new outfit for sledding, yes, she could bring her own gear, and that no, it most definitely could not be taped.
"I'll be back sometime tomorrow afternoon," she yelled to her father.
"Okay, honey"
She sighed. As of late, those old scrolls had taken up too much of his time; her father spent almost all of his time locked up in the study, translating them.
The thick coat she wore was a lot warmer than the blazer she'd had on, which was a comfort. Snow fell all around her, softening the world. Street lights caught fat flakes as they drifted down, momentarily illuminating them.
The soft footfalls, crunching in the snow, were the only noise down the entire street. Lights on in some of the houses; others dark, like sleeping giants.
Sakura tilted her head back, her mouth open, and caught a snowflake on her tongue. The ice quickly turned to water and trickled down her throat; the chill of the air helped ease her cut, where it ached with a hot pain.
She took a quick look to make sure no one was watching, then closed her eyes and pirouetted down the white-thickened sidewalk. If anyone had looked out their window right then, they would have seen a strange young girl, twirling down the sidewalk, snowflakes in her hair and an oddly joyful expression on her face–like she was free for the first time in an eternity.
When Sakura reached the theater, Tomoyo was just pulling up in her limo.
"Sakura!" She waved, a pout breaking onto her face. "Are you sure I can't make you an outfit?"
"Positive, Tomoyo," she said firmly, falling in step with her as they sauntered into the theater.
Tomoyo glanced over at where her friend was sleeping on the floor. Sakura's breath was even and quiet, which could only mean that she was out like a light.
Sakura, what's happened to you? she wondered sadly. You were so happyand now you're almost the same again, but there's still something bothering you, and I'm not the only one who can tell
If only you knew Syaoran loves you so much, and you still don't seeWhatever it is that's hurting you, Sakura, he'd protect you from it if you only told him
She closed her eyes, trying to fall asleep.
"Sledding time!"
Sakura blinked, then scowled at the yellow face in front of her eyes. "Kero, it isn't even morning yet."
"It is too!" He dropped the clock on her stomach, and she groggily picked it up. "It's exactly 9:36 in the morning, lazy."
"Spiffy." She dropped it on the floor and rolled over, clenching her eyes shut.
There were a few mumbled curses, and then silence.
It's quiet. Too quiet.
"SAKURA, WAKE UP!"
She yelped in shock, sitting bolt upright, then seized the bullhorn and whacked Kero over the head with it. "Don't ever do that again! I nearly lost an eardrum!"
He floated to the ground, swirly-eyed, as Tomoyo dazedly sat up in her sleeping bag nearby. "What's going on?"
"Kero decided to be my wake-up call," she replied dryly, a scowl on her face.
"Oh. Well, we might as well get a move on." Tomoyo got out of her sleeping bag and started folding it up.
I hate morning people
Syaoran's a morning person, another part of her mind reminded her. But you don't hate him.
Ignoring it, she started to get up too.
"We'll be back in a little while," Tomoyo called, shutting the door behind her. Icicles now hung from the trees and gutters, making the outside world even more magical than usual.
Sakura's breath fogged in front of her as she stared at the sky, watching the white flakes still drift down, like someone shaking down from the clouds. There's nothing quite as beautiful as a snowy day she reflected. Everything was quiet; it was utter calm; serenity and peace seemed to rule all.
Whap!
Something cold and wet smacked into the side of her face as she yelped in shock, then turned and glared at the floating teddy bear. "Kero!"
A sudden grin spread across her face, and she scooped up a handful of snow, then chucked it at him. He was immediately flattened.
"Snowball fight!" Tomoyo yelled.
Kero used his magics to hurl snowballs at the girls while they threw them at him and at each other. In a matter of minutes, what had been a smooth blanket of white covering the Daidouji residence open front yard was now a churned battlefield. Volleys of snow missiles were launched all over the place, their targets random. Soon, both Tomoyo and Kero turned on Sakura, and she was chased all around the front yard, shrieking with laughter.
Turning, she swept up a fistful of the icy slush and hurled it at them, but it missed by a long shot and fell, in a slow arc, towards someone coming down the sidewalk.
"Uh oh," said Tomoyo.
"Oh, shit!" said Kero.
"Look out!" Sakura yelled frantically.
Sploosh!
Syaoran stood on the sidewalk, blinking through rivulets of slush spurting from the new pile of sleet decorating the top of his head.
"Umhi?" Sakura said weakly.
Shaking it off, he grinned, then picked up another handful and lobbed it at her. "Hi."
"Get him!" Kero yelled, sending dozens of snowballs hurtling towards him.
In a minute, everybody was throwing snowballs at everybody and not even looking to see whether they hit or not.
I haven't had this much fun in such a long time
Sakura launched a snowball at Kero, and he laughed wickedly, then glowed gold. Sakura gasped as she was lifted off her feet and deposited in a snow bank near a tree. To add insult to injury, the minute she sat up another pile of snow, which had been shaken loose, dumped itself on her from one of the tree branches.
Poking her head out from the mound, she glared at Kero, scowling. "That was cheating," she accused.
"Me? Cheat? No way." He dropped a snowball on her head.
"That's it, you little–"
She stood up and started chasing him around the yard. About to catch him by his tufted tail, she was stopped as a pair of arms seized her around the waist and dropped her, once more, into a snow bank.
"Okay, this is so not fair," she said as soon as she'd managed to get her head clear of the snow. "Since when do you take his side?"
"No comment," Syaoran replied with a grin.
Sighing, she pushed sopping wet hair away from her eyes and stood up.
Syaoran caught her arm suddenly, staring at her forehead, and she remembered too late the cut she had. "Sakura–where'd you–" His eyes widened in shock as he let go. "It'syou–isn't it?" he asked slowly. "You're the one who–then that means it's Ueno–"
She stared, dumbstruck. He knew. Somehow, he knew. But how?
More importantly, what was she going to do?
I can't let him get hurt–he knows, and he might confront Ueno when he gets back–
I don't know what to do!
She did the only thing she could do right then.
Whirling, Sakura ran home.
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Okay, a really, really, REALLY big thanks to all you people out there who reviewed! I know it took me a while to get this up, and I was seriously considering not finishing this, but then I read my reviews, and you guys made me remember what it's like to read an unfinished story! I think I'll go with one last chapter after this (probably on the short side, gomen nasai -_-;) and thenI may keep on writing more stories on this pen name, I may not. I know I'll be changing this name a LOT too, just for fun. If you want to know, some names I may use are: The Mildly Irritated Hatter, Little Evil Sheep of Doom, Steel Butterfly, Tora-Hime, Psycho Shinju, AoMidori, and Tatsu Kurai. Keep an eye out! ~_^
