on Trial
The Conclusion: Emotional Repercussions
A couple
of hours later, back in Electro City, Ace practiced on the ring of fire
for the grand finale trick when he received a psychic message from Angie
that she would be home within the next hour. However, he also sensed
pain and sadness in her heart, which revealed the hearing did not go the
way she had wanted.
Coming
off the plane at Electro City International, she found Ace and Cosmo and
hugged them. "It's great to be home again."
"It's great
to have you back," said Ace. However, we need to talk when we
return to the Express. I know you're in more pain than you want us
to see.
Okay,
because you're right. I am in a lot of pain right now.
Returning
home after a long couple of days away, Angie knew she was more sad than
happy.
As soon
as they entered the Express, Ace wanted Cosmo to take her luggage to her
room so he could talk with her alone. He then faced his kindred sister.
"Angie, they didn't get the parole, did they?"
"No, they
didn't. It's no victory or defeat. Mr. Rogers won't be with
his family, and Mr. Fallon will be staying in a little longer. Fallon
deserves to stay behind bars, especially after he tried to attack Mr. Rogers'
son."
"Fallon
did that? Why?"
"It's obvious.
Fallon had no remorse for what he did, and he remained defiant all the
way through the hearing. He yelled at me because he thought I would
use my celebrity status to set him free. When the parole was denied,
he almost got his hands on Barry, but I stopped him in his place without
physically hurting him, of course."
"I'm glad
you were able to restrain yourself from harming him."
"Ace, the
last thing I wanted to do was get myself in trouble with the authorities."
"Maybe,
but I sense something else. You're a little upset because you discovered
a certain shifter decided to follow you to the hearing."
"Which
reminds me, where is Marshall right now? If she's at the Sanctuary,
I want to have a long talk with her. She had no business following
me. This was a private matter."
:I'm
here somewhere, but not at the Sanctuary.:
Don't
bother me right now, Marshall. I'm in the middle of a serious discussion.
:Well,
guess what, you and I need to have a discussion ourselves. If you
want this mess settled, then meet me immediately.:
Marshall,
Ace thought sternly, I'll let her see you in a few minutes. Let
us finish this first, okay?
:Very
well, Magician. I'll let her find me.:
Ace then
went back to speaking with Angie. "Angie, I—"
"You knew
Marshall followed me, didn't you?" she suddenly snapped.
"Only after
Michael Raven and Father Sean came to the airport and told us when you
left. We couldn't tell you because we were afraid you would be affected
emotionally during the hearing. In fact, it got to the point where
you actually broadsent an image into everyone's mind in the room, and Marshall
had to tell everyone not to react…including Ashley and Rita."
Angie was
shocked. "I did that? Everyone, including Williamson,
Fallon, the Rogers family…?"
"Yes.
You became very emotional after Rogers' son Barry had his little outburst,
which caused you to broadsend that image of the moment you learned of your
parents' deaths. Marshall also knew of a rather disturbing dream,
where you're actually trying to…kill Fallon. Your parents knew it,
too."
"I know
my parents did. But how did Marshall—"
"She can
dreamwalk, remember? She saw you using your powers to make him nervous,
and then nearly choking him to death. Angie, I'm very worried about
you."
"You don't
need to worry about me, Ace, I'm fine!" She then stormed out of the
Express to cool off for a while.
He then
put his face down. Marshall, it's up to you right now. Angie's
blocking my mind.
As Angie
walked in a rapid pace, she noticed a birch tree not too far away.
"Maybe I can collect my thoughts there." She then entered a nearby
park and sat underneath the tree. She closed her eyes and softly
said, "Ace, I'm sorry. Please forgive me."
Angie,
you haven't done anything wrong, but you need to talk to someone about
how you're really feeling.
:Yeah,
like me.:
She opened
her eyes and looked up into the tree. "Marshall, get down here.
We need to talk immediately."
The silver
falcon swooped just inches away from Angie's head and landed on the ground.
:Hello,
Angie,: Marshall thought coolly to the female magician.
"Marshall,
I want to know how and, more importantly, why you followed me 1500 miles
to the parole hearing in my hometown. Didn't that leave your wings
exhausted?"
:Not
really, no. How did I follow you? I "tagged" you, finding out
through our link about your problem, which made me concerned. As
for why, something was wrong enough to warn me you might need covert watching.
Appears I was proven right, too.:
"What do
you mean?" Angie asked nervously. "What do you know?"
:Ace
did explain that you broadsent, right?:
"Yes, along
with the fact you looked into my dream," she reacted with slight anger.
:Ah,
yes. Your dreams were pleasant, too…You're emotionally distraught
about those acts already, so you should go to the Sanctuary now.:
"I still
don't understand how I was able to broadsend an image into the minds of
everyone in the room."
:Your
emotions hold the key to your power. Angie, my suggestion about going
to the Sanctuary is no longer a request, but a command. You are starting
to broadsend again, and the only place within running distance that is
shielded is there. Now move!:
"You can't
force me to go against my will, Marshall! I don't need it!"
Suddenly,
the falcon's eyes flashed in silver light as a surge of power swirled around
her soul. :Go. I am not kidding, Angela Jacobs.
Head there now or I will forcibly remove you there myself.:
The female
magician gasped in fear, knowing Marshall was not one to kid around in
a situation as serious as this. "All right, all right, I'm going,
but don't think I'm happy about it."
She then
took off for the House Sanctuary as fast as she could. "She's crazy,"
she said to herself. "There's nothing wrong with me!"
A few minutes
later, she noticed Victor carefully clipping roses in the Sanctuary's garden.
He turned
and saw Angie looking very nervous. "Angie, are you okay? What's
wrong?"
"I…I don't
know," she responded with heavy breathing. After being allowed to
get her breathing back to normal, she added, "I'm a little mad at Marshall
because she followed me to my hometown for the hearing." She explained
what had happened during the course of the parole hearing, carefully leaving
out Marshall's intervention with the snake. "It's a victory because
Fallon's back behind bars, but it's also a defeat because Rogers won't
be with his family for another seven years."
"So Fallon
was a jerk?" Victor asked. No, he thought. From the
way Angie's reacting about Fallon, "jerk" isn't enough for that man.
"Let me
put it this way. He kept insisting it wasn't his fault, and when
he lost the parole, he almost attacked Rogers' son. I had to use
my powers to stop him."
Victor
whistled in surprise. "That bad? What a creep. What about
Rogers?"
"He was
sad but understanding. When I mentioned about his family possibly
being involved, he realized it was one scenario he never expected could
have happened."
After thinking
carefully, Victor put his hands on Angie's shoulders and said, "It sounds
like you need someone a little more experienced in dealing with tangled
relationships and time to heal. We can have our first date when you
feel ready for it, but not before. I want you to feel better about
yourself first."
"Oh, Victor,"
she said sadly, "I'm so sorry. I feel I'm wrecking everything."
He then
came up and gave her a hug. "No, Angie. You've got a lot to
deal with right now, and I think that needs to be the priority for you
right now. Father Gregor is in the Sanctuary proper if you want to
chat with him."
"Okay,"
she said returning the embrace. "Thank you." She next walked
into the Sanctuary itself.
Victor,
though, could not help being concerned. "She's going through a rough
time. I hope she'll be okay."
In the
main area of the Sanctuary, Father Gregor noticed the female magician and
greeted her with a warm smile upon her entrance. After she returned
the greetings, he said, "Come, join me on the floor, Angela. You
are troubled about the outcome of the parole hearing…"
"Wait a
sec. Can you read my—"
"No, young
one. I can read it plainly on your face."
Taking
a seat next to him, she sadly said, "Father Sean, I'm just so…confused
right now."
"What has
caused this uncertainty in your soul?"
"A lot
of things in the last few days. The dream I had about strangling
Brad Fallon is the most disturbing part to me, though. I'm not capable
of doing something like that to anyone…or am I?"
Father
Gregor put his arm around Angie in trying to comfort her. "Everyone,
at some level, is indeed capable of such actions, though you are
less likely to do so than many who do come here for counsel. Let
me ask you this: Have you totally forgiven the other man for his
act against you? Just answer with your first thought, as I know how
you feel about Mr. Fallon."
Angie gave
the question intent thought and after ten seconds finally said, "Well,
maybe not completely. I mean, Mr. Rogers could have ignored Fallon's
actions."
"Do you
feel that you have to forgive this man?" he asked gently.
"I feel
compelled to do so because he does have a wife and children. He didn't
mean to do it, but he was a factor in my parents' deaths."
"Now, consider
this. If he had no family at all, no connection at all, would you
still feel that compulsion of forgiveness for him?"
"Probably
not," she answered with her face going down in shame.
"I understand.
In order to protect others, you would attempt to forget. Forgetting
is not forgiving. Forgiving requires that the wrong be fully
acknowledged, and not necessarily on both sides, though this is most helpful.
This has not been done because I believe you are not in control
of the part of you that would allow the grievance to be heard and judged
in the heart." With a sad smile and a benediction, Father Gregor
left Angie alone in the Sanctuary.
Angie rubbed
her hand through her light brown hair and shook her head. "I thought
I got rid of my guilt. I guess I was…wrong."
Sean
means more than your guilt, Angie, a quiet, yet dark female voice whispered
in the female magician's head. He means that you're not in control
of your dark side, the side that holds the shadows.
"What?"
She turned around suddenly. "Marshall, are you haggling me again?"
The voice
laughed wickedly. Who said it was Marshall? She's not doing
this.
Angie's
breathing became more upsetting by the second. "What's going on here?
Who's doing this to me?" She then remembered one person with that
kind of ability. "Mrs. Brighton, are you trying to rape my mind again?"
You
are so blind, Angela, said the mysterious voice. Mrs. Brighton's
on the run, thanks to you and your best friend, remember?
Angie then
thought about an unlikely person. "No, it isn't Ace. He'd never
do anything like this to me."
Your
kindred brother understands his darker self, but you don't.
"Ace doesn't
have a darker self!"
On the
contrary, my dear. All human beings have darker sides and
darker feelings. You don't want that to come out. You don't
want…me to come out. I will come out sooner or later.
Angie decided
to leave the Sanctuary and return to the Magic Express, the place she called
home.
She entered,
with Ace sitting in the living room. "Ace, I'm sorry for being angry
with you earlier. I didn't mean it."
He hugged
her tightly. "I know," he stated calmly. "You've had to deal
with one of your worst demons from the past, and…I'm afraid it's beginning
something bad within you."
"Bad?
How?"
"You need
to embrace all parts of yourself, including that of…darkness."
"Darkness!?"
Angie asked, becoming increasingly nervous. "What darkness?"
"There's
a darker self somewhere inside your soul, but you won't let it come out.
You won't accept it."
"Come on,
Ace, you can't be serious."
"Even I
have a darker self."
"No, you
don't! I've never seen it."
"Because
I was able to accept it years ago. You know I can still get angry,
right? Remember the exposé Paparazzo did?"
"Yeah,
I do remember. You were upset with me because I had considered getting
revenge on him for doing that to me. I guess…I'm still angry."
"I agree,"
Ace said assuredly. "However, you won't show it as much. It's
as though you keep so much inside you, and I'm worried this could harm
you if you're not careful."
Angie put
her face down. "I'm scared, Ace. I'm really scared."
"I know."
It's late. Why don't you get some sleep, and we'll talk more in
the morning after breakfast. Okay with you?
Yeah.
I am tired. I'm sorry, kindred brother.
Don't
be, Angie. We all go through these difficult stages in life.
Now, go to bed and rest.
"Okay.
Good night, Ace."
"Good night."
When Angie went to her room, Ace quickly made contact with Marshall. You
were right, Marshall. Angie won't accept her darker feelings.
:It
is unfortunate. Her parents are also gravely concerned for the state
of her inner being. The question right now is, what will it take
for her to embrace all parts of her being?:
I don't
know. I hope nothing drastic will be required, but her power could
become dangerous if the darkness explodes.
That night,
Angie was asleep when the strange voice from within returned to haunt her
once more. You can't hide from me, Angela Jacobs. You know
I'm here, yet you won't let me be a part of you.
She suddenly
awakened. "What the—who's there? What's happening?" She
scanned the room with her eyes. "Cosmo, if this is your idea of a
joke, it's not very funny!"
Cosmo?
Ha, why would someone you care about play a sick joke like this?
However, this is no joke. You don't want me around because
you will lose your friends if I am seen by anyone, especially your kindred
brother, Ace Cooper.
Angie then
closed her eyes and went inside herself. Angry self, is that you?
Nope,
it's not me. I'm afraid it's someone a lot worse than me.
Then,
what's happening to me?
I can't
tell you that, Angie. You've got to come up with the answers on your
own.
Angie started
breathing heavily and became more frightened. "What is this!?"
In his
room, Ace slept soundly until he felt a sharp pain in his head. "Angie,"
he gasped.
He quickly
got out of bed and ran to her room. "Angie, are you okay?"
"No, I'm
not. This is scaring me now. What's wrong with me?"
The Magician
embraced her in warmth. "It's your darker self. As long as
you don't accept that, you're going to place yourself at greater risk.
Listen, tomorrow morning, after breakfast, I want you to go back to the
House Sanctuary for a little while, okay?"
"Maybe…maybe
that could help me some. Sorry I woke you up."
Ace then
noticed the quarter on the nightstand. "It's beautiful. From
your aunt?"
"Yeah.
Mom gave one to her after she and Dad got married. After the Sanctuary,
I'm going to the Sentimental Savings shop to get the quarter made into
a necklace. I want to preserve this forever."
"Okay.
Just think about what I said, though."
"I will.
Thanks, Ace."
"Anytime,
kindred sister. You'll be all right now?"
"Yeah.
'Night." She then went back to sleep.
As Ace
walked back to his room, he wondered if Angie would ever accept her darker
feelings before it was too late.
The next
morning, Angie wasted no time in getting to the House Sanctuary to try
and sort out her own feelings. "Why is this happening to me, why
now of all times? I haven't done anything wrong."
"Don't
be so sure of that, Angela," said someone sitting right behind her.
Angie recognized
the voice and had a tone of anger. "Marshall, are you trying to give
me a headache again? I went through enough yesterday with you."
"No, I'm
just trying to help you see the truth: You're scared of the darker
side of yourself."
"What are
you talking about!?" Angie toned in an angry whisper. "I am not
afraid of my dark self!"
"That is
a lie you tell yourself, the only one you have ever allowed yourself
to believe."
"And just
why would I be afraid?" the magician queried seriously.
"You fear
if others see that side of you, they will stop liking you as a friend or
sister. You, despite everything, cannot trust well."
"Why wouldn't
I trust others or myself?" Angie demanded. "I have learned trust!"
"Have you
really?"
"We-ell,
Ace…and the family."
"Maybe
so, but they had to prove it first, didn't they? Plus, you are always
trying to prove to yourself that their trust is justified with you.
What do you fear, Angela, that you are unable to trust others, even (and
most importantly) yourself in all occasions?"
"I-I don't
know."
"Do you
want me to tell you, even though this could hurt you?"
"Yes…please."
"You cannot
trust others because you do not see yourself as worthy of love. Others,
yes, but yourself, no. Very deep within your soul, you feel unworthy…and
you fear love. There's nothing else you fear more than love itself,
and you are frightened of it on all levels."
"All levels?"
Angie asked in slight confusion. "You mean there's more to love than
just family, friends, and romance?"
"I don't
believe this," Marshall said, very surprised. "You're almost 25 years
old, and you don't know all the levels of love?"
"In case
you forgot, Marshall, I led a sheltered life growing up. I was too
busy in my studies to think about love other than my parents and my best
friend at the time."
"There
is something I need to know, though. The night you learned your parents
died…you tore up your prom dress and didn't have your magical gift
go out of control. How come?"
"That's
because…I was too overcome with emotion to even think about using my powers.
The magic within me was the last thing on my mind or in my heart
at that point."
"Oh, I
see. You were awfully lucky that night. However, I'm warning
you right now. If you don't accept the darker part of yourself soon,
you're going to have a magical catastrophe within your soul."
"Magical…catastrophe?
I don't understand."
"You're
going down the same path I took, where I kept my own anger and grievances
buried away. I almost killed Ace in my gryphon form, remember?"
"I know
that. However, I'm not a shifter. I can only magically change
clothing, not forms. What is it I need to do to understand this darkness
inside of me?"
"I can't
tell you. In fact, no one, not even your parents, can answer that.
It's all up to you, Angie."
"Gee, thanks,
Marshall," said a sarcastic Angie. "You're some help." She
then looked at her watch. "I need to get to the Sentimental Savings
place so I can get my special quarter turned into a necklace." Angie
quickly got up and ran out of the Sanctuary.
Marshall
knew better, though. "She's going to keep running away until it's
too late. I fear she is placing herself in danger by not allowing
acceptance of her darker self."
I know,
thought Ace to the shifter guardian. Unfortunately, it's exactly
what you said. Angie must face that darker self, or something dangerous
could come out of it.
She was
on her way to the Sentimental Savings store when that dark voice returned.
You
can run, Angie, but you can't hide!
"Stop it!"
Angie whispered loudly. "I don't want to hear from you again!
Just leave me alone!"
She made
it to the Sentimental Savings shop and got her special quarter saved into
a necklace. After paying for it, she put it proudly around her neck.
"That's it. Now Mom and Dad are even closer in my heart."
Angie left
the mall and soon went about her normal daily activities, including shopping
for groceries and cooking good meals for her friends.
However,
deep down she knew her darker self would continue the inner war against
the female magician herself, a war which would last quite a while…
The parole hearing did not leave
her satisfied at all, and now Angie's darker half is beginning to show
signs of surfacing. Will Angie be able to face her darker self, or
will she continue to ignore it and hope it will go away? This is
only the first of three major stories focusing on Angie's inner struggle
with her darker self. The next story, "A Double Take of Revenge,"
will be coming soon, so stay tuned for it.
