Chapter 5: Draco the Fake-o.
The next morning at Potions, Cho was eagerly awaiting Homie's arrival. She seemed to be wearing more make-up than usual, with a lot of glitter on her eyes and lips. Cho also sported a new outfit: a pink angora sweater with matching headband and silver stretch pants.
The rest of the class noticed. They all wondered if Homie could possibly be contagious. None the less, the rest of the class was sitting as far away from the table where Cho sat and where no doubt Homie would be sitting when he arrived as well.
All of a sudden, Crabbe and Goyle entered with a large cassette-tape player. They announced in unison, "Introducing, the new Draco, Homie D!" Goyle pressed the play button and Crabbe held it high above his head for the whole class to hear. "Wild Thing" began to play. Draco, or at least people thought it was, entered the room. He seemed barely recognizable under all the chains and overly large sunglasses he was wearing. His hair appeared to have gel in it and was slicked back. On his feet he wore faux leather boots that seemed at least 4 sized too big. Baggy jogging pants were on him too. They couln't even see the shirt under all the chain necklaces. To much of the students' horror, he began to rap.
"Yo, my name is Draco but my homies call me D, and ya know what? I'm really hungry, I mean, I'm really thirsty. I could really go for some Pepsi! Or perhaps ice tea! Or maybe some hot cocoa, oh, that's minty!" No one made a sound. They didn't know what to do. One of their fellow students, who was barely recognizable, entered to practically ancient 60's music only to rap horribly. They only gawked. Draco's, or D's, normally pale skin turned bright pink under those ridiculous sunglasses.
D strutted over to Cho, who was equally shocked as the rest of the class, and slumped on the stool and folded his arms. It was Cho who had enough of herself to make a reaction, which was to scoot her chair away. "Yo," he said.
Excuse me, but that seat is reserved for a *cool* person," Cho told D. "But, I am cool! Aren't I? I've got it all!" D replied. Cho said nothing. She just gave him one of those one-raised-eyebrow looks and folded her arms. The rest of the class followed suit. D shifted his eyes around the room.
"Uh oh. Stink-eye. Better make a cool exit," D thought to himself. "Um..." he mumbled and darted to a stool across the room. All the students at that table quickly moved.
Just then, Homie H entered the classroom. This time, there was no music, but the outfit he donned was pretty much the same. Leather jacket and boots, heavy chains, but not as much as D, cool, non-ridiculous sunglasses, shaved head, purple scar, the works. The only difference was instead of all leather pants, he was wearing tight blue denim jeans. Cho swooned at the sight. Homie walked to the now empty stool next to Cho and sat on it, but in a cool way.
"Yo," Homie said.
"Hi," Cho replied. Her voice was high and flirtacious again.
"Stellar works, man," Homie commented.
"What?"
"Huh?"
Homie took of his sunglasses quickly and stared at her. He said slowly, "Nice outfit, girl."
"Oh... You mean my clothes! Silly me!" Cho exclaimed.
"Yeah," Homie said.
Across the room, D watched with fury. "How dare he take my beloved Cho! She's mine! She liked *me* first!" He thought to himself.
Professor Snape entered and was once again about to start the day's lecture when he caught sight of D in his absurd getup. *Oh no, not another one...* he thought. This whole punk look was driving him over the edge, slowly but surely.
"Draco Malfoy! What on earth have you done with yourself?! You look like a punk Greaser! You look worse than Potter does over here!" Snape yelled.
"Homie H," Homie corrected from across the room.
"Whatever. Your father Lucious would be ashamed!" Snape raved.
"I... but... uh..." D stuttered.
"There's no excuse for you! Get out of my sight! Go to the very back of the room this instant!" Snape said firmly and pointed.
D mumbled some things under his breath and walked sulkily to the stool his professor was pointing to. No one else was at the back table but him. He sat down and put his head on the table, mumbling away.
"Now that that's cleared up, lets begin. We will be continuing from where we left off yesterday. Get out the same ingredients and set them in order next to your cauldrons," Snape instructed.
"Pass the ginger root," Homie asked Cho.
"What about the magic word?" Cho asked.
"Huh?"
"The magic word is 'please.' Don't your parents teach you anything?" Cho questioned.
"I have no parents," Homie replied dully.
"Don't be like a disturbed teenager. I've heard that from other teens all the time, claiming they have no parents..."
"Whatever, just pass it," Homie replied.
"I will, but it's still very rude... Here," Cho said and handed him what he needed. Homie put it down and continued.
"Aren't you going to say 'thank you'?"
"Shut-up, woman." That did it.
"WOMAN?!" Cho was enraged. "You call me woman?! I have a name, it's Cho, given to me by my parents. Yes, I said parents. Unlike you, claiming you have none."
"But I really don-" Homie began.
"Don't start with me! They'd be ashamed of you! You don't just say 'shut-up' to Cho Chang! *My* parents taught me better!"
The entire class took notice of their argument now, even Professor Snape.
"And another thing, you didn't say 'please' or 'thank you'! How low can you get? Stay away from me, Potter!"
"It's Homie H..." Homie tried again.
"Whatever!" Cho yelled and stormed off to the table where D was once at before he moved.
Homie blinked a few times and looked around. Everyone was staring at him. He didn't know what to do. Snape was the first of anyone in the room to say anything." "So, three little fools having a dispute and sitting alone at three isolated island tables. What a pity!" Snape remarked sarcastically. Some Slytherins laughed cruelly. Cho stood up and was about to scream again, but caught herself and eased back onto her stool. She wasn't about to talk back to a teacher. That was a huge no-no.
"Cat got your tounge?" Snape asked Cho. Cho still said nothing and just sat there breathing heavily. "Shall we continue with our lesson, class, or will there be more bickering?" Snape questioned. Silence followed. "Ah, then we'd better keep going. About the concoction you're about to make..." Snape began. The rest of the lesson everyone did as they were told and no more fighting went on.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Homie slumped in a chair in front of the Gryffindor common room fire. It was now evening, and he had just come up after dinner. "What went wrong?" He asked himself. "What? I think it was my attitude. But she liked it yesterday... Ho hum. On the other hand, she doesn't like Malfoy either, which is a plus. I know I have to do something. But what? I know! I'll ask Ron! He was good at it last night!" Homie got up from his chair and raced to the boys' dormitory. There was Ron, passed out on his bed, not even in his jimjams. Lazy Ron. He was a person who loved sleep, so he went to bed earlier than any of the other Gryffindor boys. This was even early for him, but there was roast turkey for dinner, and Homie knew Ron always passes out after turkey. Homie poked Ron to wake him up. "Ron, Ron, wake up! This is another emergency!" Homie pleaded.
Ron yawned. "What? I'm up... I'm up..."
"Cho doesn't like me anymore! I think it was my attitude, but I don't understand girls! You have a sister, Ron, what should I do?"
"Huh? Ginny annoying little sister..."
"Yes, yes, but what do I do?" Homie begged.
"You have tizzy fit?" Ron asked Homie with his eyes half open and a bit crossed.
"Yes, tizzy fit, but Ron what do I do about it?"
"After tizzy fit you kiss and make up. Fred and George very good at it after tizzy fits with Mum about Weasley Wizard Wheezes and stuff," Ron explained to Homie and yawned again.
"Brilliant Ron!" Homie exclaimed. "But how do I do so?"
"Mum love chocolate. Ron love chocolate. Mmm... Chocolate..." "Great idea, Ron! How do you think up these great ideas?"
"Could I please have some chocolate in my telephone soup?" Ron asked. Homie sighed. "Thanks for the help. Get some rest now..." Homie said softly.
"O-ki-day," Ron said and was snoring again. Homie went over to his bed and looked under it. He then pulled out a heart shaped chocolate box. Hermione gave it to him a month ago for Valentine's day. He opened it. "Hmmm... I've only eaten a few, so this'll work fine." He picked out a few empty chocolate wrappers, closed the lid, and headed for the Ravenclaw portrait hole.
He sad next to the picture and waited. He couldn't go in, he didn't know the password. So waited for Cho to arrive back from dinner. She was always last to leave the Hall, chatting away with friends. She was a very popular girl. A minute later, Homie heard footsteps. In case it was Cho, he stood up and looked. The person coming his way was...
The next morning at Potions, Cho was eagerly awaiting Homie's arrival. She seemed to be wearing more make-up than usual, with a lot of glitter on her eyes and lips. Cho also sported a new outfit: a pink angora sweater with matching headband and silver stretch pants.
The rest of the class noticed. They all wondered if Homie could possibly be contagious. None the less, the rest of the class was sitting as far away from the table where Cho sat and where no doubt Homie would be sitting when he arrived as well.
All of a sudden, Crabbe and Goyle entered with a large cassette-tape player. They announced in unison, "Introducing, the new Draco, Homie D!" Goyle pressed the play button and Crabbe held it high above his head for the whole class to hear. "Wild Thing" began to play. Draco, or at least people thought it was, entered the room. He seemed barely recognizable under all the chains and overly large sunglasses he was wearing. His hair appeared to have gel in it and was slicked back. On his feet he wore faux leather boots that seemed at least 4 sized too big. Baggy jogging pants were on him too. They couln't even see the shirt under all the chain necklaces. To much of the students' horror, he began to rap.
"Yo, my name is Draco but my homies call me D, and ya know what? I'm really hungry, I mean, I'm really thirsty. I could really go for some Pepsi! Or perhaps ice tea! Or maybe some hot cocoa, oh, that's minty!" No one made a sound. They didn't know what to do. One of their fellow students, who was barely recognizable, entered to practically ancient 60's music only to rap horribly. They only gawked. Draco's, or D's, normally pale skin turned bright pink under those ridiculous sunglasses.
D strutted over to Cho, who was equally shocked as the rest of the class, and slumped on the stool and folded his arms. It was Cho who had enough of herself to make a reaction, which was to scoot her chair away. "Yo," he said.
Excuse me, but that seat is reserved for a *cool* person," Cho told D. "But, I am cool! Aren't I? I've got it all!" D replied. Cho said nothing. She just gave him one of those one-raised-eyebrow looks and folded her arms. The rest of the class followed suit. D shifted his eyes around the room.
"Uh oh. Stink-eye. Better make a cool exit," D thought to himself. "Um..." he mumbled and darted to a stool across the room. All the students at that table quickly moved.
Just then, Homie H entered the classroom. This time, there was no music, but the outfit he donned was pretty much the same. Leather jacket and boots, heavy chains, but not as much as D, cool, non-ridiculous sunglasses, shaved head, purple scar, the works. The only difference was instead of all leather pants, he was wearing tight blue denim jeans. Cho swooned at the sight. Homie walked to the now empty stool next to Cho and sat on it, but in a cool way.
"Yo," Homie said.
"Hi," Cho replied. Her voice was high and flirtacious again.
"Stellar works, man," Homie commented.
"What?"
"Huh?"
Homie took of his sunglasses quickly and stared at her. He said slowly, "Nice outfit, girl."
"Oh... You mean my clothes! Silly me!" Cho exclaimed.
"Yeah," Homie said.
Across the room, D watched with fury. "How dare he take my beloved Cho! She's mine! She liked *me* first!" He thought to himself.
Professor Snape entered and was once again about to start the day's lecture when he caught sight of D in his absurd getup. *Oh no, not another one...* he thought. This whole punk look was driving him over the edge, slowly but surely.
"Draco Malfoy! What on earth have you done with yourself?! You look like a punk Greaser! You look worse than Potter does over here!" Snape yelled.
"Homie H," Homie corrected from across the room.
"Whatever. Your father Lucious would be ashamed!" Snape raved.
"I... but... uh..." D stuttered.
"There's no excuse for you! Get out of my sight! Go to the very back of the room this instant!" Snape said firmly and pointed.
D mumbled some things under his breath and walked sulkily to the stool his professor was pointing to. No one else was at the back table but him. He sat down and put his head on the table, mumbling away.
"Now that that's cleared up, lets begin. We will be continuing from where we left off yesterday. Get out the same ingredients and set them in order next to your cauldrons," Snape instructed.
"Pass the ginger root," Homie asked Cho.
"What about the magic word?" Cho asked.
"Huh?"
"The magic word is 'please.' Don't your parents teach you anything?" Cho questioned.
"I have no parents," Homie replied dully.
"Don't be like a disturbed teenager. I've heard that from other teens all the time, claiming they have no parents..."
"Whatever, just pass it," Homie replied.
"I will, but it's still very rude... Here," Cho said and handed him what he needed. Homie put it down and continued.
"Aren't you going to say 'thank you'?"
"Shut-up, woman." That did it.
"WOMAN?!" Cho was enraged. "You call me woman?! I have a name, it's Cho, given to me by my parents. Yes, I said parents. Unlike you, claiming you have none."
"But I really don-" Homie began.
"Don't start with me! They'd be ashamed of you! You don't just say 'shut-up' to Cho Chang! *My* parents taught me better!"
The entire class took notice of their argument now, even Professor Snape.
"And another thing, you didn't say 'please' or 'thank you'! How low can you get? Stay away from me, Potter!"
"It's Homie H..." Homie tried again.
"Whatever!" Cho yelled and stormed off to the table where D was once at before he moved.
Homie blinked a few times and looked around. Everyone was staring at him. He didn't know what to do. Snape was the first of anyone in the room to say anything." "So, three little fools having a dispute and sitting alone at three isolated island tables. What a pity!" Snape remarked sarcastically. Some Slytherins laughed cruelly. Cho stood up and was about to scream again, but caught herself and eased back onto her stool. She wasn't about to talk back to a teacher. That was a huge no-no.
"Cat got your tounge?" Snape asked Cho. Cho still said nothing and just sat there breathing heavily. "Shall we continue with our lesson, class, or will there be more bickering?" Snape questioned. Silence followed. "Ah, then we'd better keep going. About the concoction you're about to make..." Snape began. The rest of the lesson everyone did as they were told and no more fighting went on.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Homie slumped in a chair in front of the Gryffindor common room fire. It was now evening, and he had just come up after dinner. "What went wrong?" He asked himself. "What? I think it was my attitude. But she liked it yesterday... Ho hum. On the other hand, she doesn't like Malfoy either, which is a plus. I know I have to do something. But what? I know! I'll ask Ron! He was good at it last night!" Homie got up from his chair and raced to the boys' dormitory. There was Ron, passed out on his bed, not even in his jimjams. Lazy Ron. He was a person who loved sleep, so he went to bed earlier than any of the other Gryffindor boys. This was even early for him, but there was roast turkey for dinner, and Homie knew Ron always passes out after turkey. Homie poked Ron to wake him up. "Ron, Ron, wake up! This is another emergency!" Homie pleaded.
Ron yawned. "What? I'm up... I'm up..."
"Cho doesn't like me anymore! I think it was my attitude, but I don't understand girls! You have a sister, Ron, what should I do?"
"Huh? Ginny annoying little sister..."
"Yes, yes, but what do I do?" Homie begged.
"You have tizzy fit?" Ron asked Homie with his eyes half open and a bit crossed.
"Yes, tizzy fit, but Ron what do I do about it?"
"After tizzy fit you kiss and make up. Fred and George very good at it after tizzy fits with Mum about Weasley Wizard Wheezes and stuff," Ron explained to Homie and yawned again.
"Brilliant Ron!" Homie exclaimed. "But how do I do so?"
"Mum love chocolate. Ron love chocolate. Mmm... Chocolate..." "Great idea, Ron! How do you think up these great ideas?"
"Could I please have some chocolate in my telephone soup?" Ron asked. Homie sighed. "Thanks for the help. Get some rest now..." Homie said softly.
"O-ki-day," Ron said and was snoring again. Homie went over to his bed and looked under it. He then pulled out a heart shaped chocolate box. Hermione gave it to him a month ago for Valentine's day. He opened it. "Hmmm... I've only eaten a few, so this'll work fine." He picked out a few empty chocolate wrappers, closed the lid, and headed for the Ravenclaw portrait hole.
He sad next to the picture and waited. He couldn't go in, he didn't know the password. So waited for Cho to arrive back from dinner. She was always last to leave the Hall, chatting away with friends. She was a very popular girl. A minute later, Homie heard footsteps. In case it was Cho, he stood up and looked. The person coming his way was...
